Chapter 59: Dry Humor and Quirky
"Good night,"
Chuck explained frankly, nodding to Monica. "Your friends are waiting for you."
Monica followed Chuck's gaze toward the door, immediately realizing her friends must have been eavesdropping from the other side. She angrily pushed the door open.
She figured her previous failure wasn't just because she was drunk, but also because her friends had been listening from behind the door, and Chuck, having overheard them, had refused because he felt the situation wasn't appropriate.
As everyone knows, New York apartment doors are never locked.
The push of the door startled everyone in the room and they scattered. Meeting Monica's angry glare, they all struck various poses, pretending they hadn't been eavesdropping at the door.
"You're the doctor, right?"
her best friend Rachel said, but then stopped him. Seeing Chuck about to leave, she called out, "I'm Monica's best friend, Rachel. Nice to meet you. Why don't you come in and sit for a while?"
"Okay,"
Chuck glanced at Monica, who looked upset, nodded, and walked in.
Ross stood there with his arms folded, watching Chuck enter the room with an unhappy expression.
Monica was overwhelmed by a complex mix of emotions, unable to sort them out for a moment, and went straight into the bedroom.
"So, how was dinner tonight?"
Rachel warmly invited Chuck to sit down, then began her interrogation.
"It was fine. We had a frank exchange of ideas."
Chuck thought for a moment and gave an accurate assessment.
"That's it?"
Rachel pressed on, unsatisfied. "Isn't there anything interesting that happens when you scientists get together for dinner?"
"Ahem."
Dr. Ross Geller coughed loudly, reminding everyone that he was also a scientist.
It was perfectly reasonable to ask him about such things.
"Don't get all technical on us,"
Rachel glanced at Ross, who had coughed to remind her, and added with sudden realization, "Nobody wants to hear about how to identify dinosaur species. That's not interesting at all. Talk about something we can understand."
"..."
Ross's face darkened.
Dinosaurs are fascinating.
"Yeah,"
a handsome young man with a sarcastic air said with a half-smile. "Like, tell us how kissing counts as drinking, or something like that?"
"Yeah, yeah, yeah."
The dark-haired Italian guy standing next to him nodded repeatedly, his eyes revealing his intense interest in the intimate details.
"This is Chandler, and this is Joey. They live in the apartment across the hall."
Rachel briefly introduced them to Chuck, then said with mock indignation, "Chandler, Joey, how dare you ask such a question!"
Even as she spoke, her eyes kept glancing at Chuck, hoping he'd respond.
"It's nothing. If you want to hear it, I can explain."
Chuck shrugged.
"Yes, yes!"
Another tall, blonde girl chimed in, nodding even faster than Joey, her face brimming with gossip-fueled excitement.
"This is Phoebe,"
Rachel also introduced her. "If you don't mind, tell us about it."
"Alright,"
Chuck began to explain.
"..."
Everyone was stunned.
They wanted to hear juicy details, so what was with all this endless string of mathematical equations and formulas?
They instinctively glanced at Dr. Ross Geller,
the man who could put them to sleep with his endless dinosaur lectures. He looked just as bewildered as they were. His expression faltered the moment he noticed their gazes, as if trying to imply he understood. But his performance was too wooden and unconvincing, failing to fool even a stranger, let alone his friends.
"Wait, wait,"
Rachel interrupted rudely, unable to bear it any longer. "That's it?"
"Don't you want to hear the mathematical proof of how kissing counts as drinking?"
Chuck said seriously.
"Yes, that's what we want to hear,"
Chandler, the handsome young man with the sarcastic demeanor, said self-deprecatingly. "What else would we serious intellectual types want to hear?"
He then glared at his good friend Ross with a mocking look. "Dr. Geller, do you think his calculations are correct?"
"..."
Ross stared at his friend, speechless.
He didn't understand a damn thing.
Chuck continued to mentally calculate and verbalize this absurd mathematical problem for a full half-hour, making Rachel and the others drowsy. Ross's face grew darker, and he could only watch Chuck's calm explanation with awkward politeness.
Monica had been in the bedroom, thinking about her experience that evening. She had collapsed on the bed, buried herself under the covers, and cried quietly for a long time. When she needed comfort and found none, she wiped her tears and secretly cracked open the door to see this scene. She was both stunned and embarrassed.
Her previous depression and unhappiness instantly vanished.
That's just the kind of person Chuck is. It wasn't personal against her at all. And Paige was right—if you put in the effort to win over a guy like that, you'll be together forever. He's so attractive and challenging!
Monica, never one to back down from a challenge, and certainly not one to give up halfway, how could she let this setback discourage her?
"Okay, it's getting late. You should head home,"
Monica said with a smile. "Drive safely and be careful."
"Don't worry, I don't drink,"
Chuck said, delivering his parting words. He repeated his previous statement to Monica, then nodded to the others and stood up to leave.
Monica walked him to the door and turned around to see everyone sprawled there in completely relaxed positions.
"Oh my God, Monica, he's gorgeous, but he's such a nerd. So boring," Rachel said with a look of regret, shaking her head.
Ross was happy to hear that, but then his mood soured.
Because Rachel casually added, "It's just like when Ross talks about dinosaurs!"
"You really think he's like Ross?"
Chandler scoffed. "I think he's just being dry and sarcastic, deliberately messing with us."
Rachel and the others were stunned. "You mean he did it on purpose? All those mathematical formulas were just gibberish?"
"If you don't believe me, ask Ross,"
Chandler playfully called out his good friend Ross.
"Of course he was talking nonsense!"
Ross replied with obvious relief.
No wonder he hadn't understood anything. It was all gibberish. It wasn't anything special. If Chuck had spouted nonsense about dinosaurs, Ross was sure he would have been just as lost.
"What are you doing!"
At that moment, in everyone's stunned eyes, the tall blonde Phoebe suddenly reached out and hugged Monica. When Monica was released, she covered her lips and stared with a face full of existential confusion.
"Let's test whether this Chuck guy was talking nonsense."
Phoebe smiled mischievously: "Although I don't understand his string of mathematical mumbo-jumbo, I heard his conclusion. I just verified it. With my many years of drinking experience, he's absolutely right!"
Everyone: "..."
(End of Chapter)
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