We spent almost another hour at headquarters, scrolling through holographic diagrams and sorting through options of who would act, how, and from which side in the event of a full-scale attack by Eve. I really hope that if it comes to it, our dearest Seraphim won't chicken out and will actually help, but to be honest, I was once again deeply disappointed in their inaction. I get it—the Darkness, the danger, the risk of "infection"... But they're just too... passive, aren't they? They'll never go into battle themselves, never strike first, always waiting for something, biding their time. This "wise" tactic of waiting might have worked before, but now it was completely inappropriate. Especially in a situation where the enemy, who openly wants to destroy all of Heaven, also likely dominates them all in raw power. In short, apart from Luci, whom we'll talk about later, it seems no one can really help me in battle.
When the main skeleton of the strategy was finally assembled, and all the tedious work of adding "flesh and skin" to it was safely passed on to Abel's broad shoulders and Jacob's wise head, I was about to wrap things up and fly off to finish one very important, but relatively non-urgent matter. But then, as usual, Hera found his level-100 eloquence and talked everyone into getting drunk again... Oh, what a man... I mean, angel. As soon as important matters need to be discussed, he can't string two words together and communicates like a "drunk dad" from the memes, but when it comes to talking the whole company into another booze-up, he could out-talk any fucking politician from my past world! And this is despite the fact that everyone here is, essentially, a naive simpleton compared to the hardened, cynical bastards that populated my-God-Slayer's world. Yeah…
Long story short, after a couple of mugs of heavenly beer, I finally made my escape. As I've said before, alcohol has almost no effect on me, and even if it did, I don't really like it, unlike the past Adam. Who, even though he didn't get drunk from it, still drank it by the bucketful. Because "The Top Dick Has the Right." That's a direct quote, by the way…
I, on the other hand, headed to… the Seraphim Tower. It was a huge, multi-story tower not far from the center of the Capital, but it didn't belong to the Seraphim themselves—the most ordinary souls who had made it to Heaven lived there. Yes, there's a term "winners," but it seems extremely stupid and pretentious to me, as it did to the past Adam, who used it only a couple of times in his long life, and then only for dramatic effect. So I don't use that shit, sticking with the simple "angels." Because "angels" is already pretentious, beautiful, and blah-blah-blah.
They called this Tower the "Seraphim Tower" for a reason. Because every Seraph, strange as it may seem, also had to sleep somewhere, eat, and do other mundane crap (I'm shocked myself, to be honest. Why did God put such primitive limitations in them if they can literally create food out of nothing? What's the point of that at all?). So the Seraphim had homes too. But while Gabriel lived in Cherub Town, and Sarakiel—not far from the Council Hall, in his medieval-style forge filled with all sorts of high-tech-magical gadgets (he says he "likes the vibe"...), many other Seraphim simply didn't need a separate house. Our young Emily was one of them, and she lived in this very Tower. And they called this tower that because many Seraphim who, for one reason or another, didn't need their own home lived there. In short, it was a popular name that was also quite pretentious and made the residents of this tower stand out a bit from the rest, so buying an apartment there was extremely difficult. Primarily because money in Heaven, as I have said repeatedly, was essentially a fiction that wasn't really needed.
So why was I flying there (and why didn't I just teleport)? It's simple. On the way, I was thinking over my next steps and calculating what I would have to say and do so that our sweet Emily… wouldn't eat that damn fruit that Eve had given her.
No one thinks I'm a complete idiot, right? I've already mentioned that Sarakiel is currently working on creating special spy drones that can detect Eve's Darkness, haven't I? And what, you ask, should be done with the existing, old models of drones? Well, thanks to Sarakiel, I was able to free up some of them and give them a new task—to patrol Heaven. And to the Seraphim, who, of course, couldn't have missed these little bastards even in stealth mode, I simply said that this was how I was patrolling a larger territory without causing unnecessary panic among the civilians. And I wasn't even lying! But my main goal was, of course, different—to observe the Seraphim themselves. Since Eve's Darkness can affect even my son, Sif (who is, mind you, literally a demigod), so strongly, it could very well work on the Seraphim too. And as for the character of a certain young Seraph... Seraph-ess? In short, I've already talked about Emily. And it was her I was most worried about. Because Sera or Michael, I'm sure, would just tell Eve to go fuck herself, and even blast her with some Light to signal her intrusion to the others. But a young, naive girl who has just barely turned two hundred is extremely easy to influence.
And I wasn't wrong. When Lute (what would I do without her? She deserves a monument of pure gold by now!) came to me with another report and informed me that Emily had been found with an "apple," which she was looking at with a mixture of horror, disgust, and… desire… Well, my heart started beating very fast then. Because it meant that Eve had AGAIN somehow come to Heaven, and even with the improved, upgraded barrier made in Heaven, they still couldn't detect her!
So how does she do it? Although… Of course! Alastor, that horned devil! He uses power borrowed from Eve (and, partially, from Lilith), thanks to his contract! And what is his main, most notable ability? What makes him stand out so much from other characters? Shadows! He's literally the lord of shadows! Eve most likely possesses the concept of Shadow, and thus can, for example, hide in those very shadows and move freely through them! And there's another plus of my unhurried mode of transportation! Because if I had simply teleported to Emily instead of flying, spending time on preparation and reflection, I would never have arrived at this brilliant theory, which answers literally all my questions!
Okay, I'm almost there, so I need to stop talking about how smart I am and get back to the main topic—the Fruit of Knowledge in Emily's possession. Undoubtedly, Eve spun some pretentious crap to this kid in the style of "it's not so black and white," then showed her a video in which I, along with my Exorcists, slaughter "poor, innocent" sinners with particular sadism and pleasure, and then fucked off into the sunset, leaving her with this Fruit. Sounds logical? Definitely. But how should I act now? Just come, take the apple from her, and fuck off into the sunset? Well, that would be bullshit. That's what parents usually do with kids they've caught with cigarettes or beer. I won't even talk about the downsides of such an approach; it's obvious that it will only anger the child, destroy any trust, and make her act the same way, just to spite the "tyrant parent." Ugh, I ended up explaining it anyway…
Then maybe I should try to convince Emily that killing sinners is actually a good deed, which allows angels to continue living normally and not turn into slaves and toys for demons and other infernal rabble? That idea is also shit, because Emily is a naive idealist to the core who has lived her entire life in the safety of Heaven, not in Hell. That is, unlike Charlie, she has simply never seen the kind of hell that these "poor, unfortunate maniac-murderer-rapists who accidentally ended up in Hell" actually unleash. Charlie is also an idealist, but she, at least, understands perfectly well that not all sinners have the right to be in Heaven. I personally explained this to her using the example of a certain mustachioed idiot-dictator during our very first meeting, and she agreed with it. But Emily is different, so such an approach definitely won't work with her.
That leaves the last, most risky, but perhaps most effective option—to tell her the truth, seasoned with lies. To complain about what a terrible, dirty job it really is, and that we don't kill all sinners, but purposefully hunt down all the absolute scum, thus cleansing Hell and giving the rest of its inhabitants a chance to live normally and, perhaps, even accept the Light. So what? It might be a little... completely untrue, but it might work. And then I'll need to keep her busy with something, to get all the silly thoughts out of her bright little head. And I'll have to tell Sera about all this, since she's almost like a mother to her.
I fly up to the huge, shining skyscraper and decide that flying in through the balcony would be… a little rude. So I smoothly descend and land right in front of the main entrance. A large white building, about twenty stories high, as I recall, and it looks absolutely stunning, especially when compared to the shit that was in my country in my past life—shabby, gray walls, balconies all different—some normal, with modern finishes, and some—emergency, rusty crap made of metal pipes, held together by a prayer, and all this, for fuck's sake, right next to each other! Here, everything was different—a perfect, shining building, as befits Heaven.
The entrance had an automatic sliding door made of a single piece of some transparent, glass-like material. This is very common in Heaven. The angels see it as something like "we have nothing to hide," and it looks beautiful, so many buildings here have these glass doors.
A snap of my fingers—and my suit changes to a more casual one—a white T-shirt with a stylized letter "A" on the chest, loose shorts, and sandals. It's hot today, and the image of a "big, scary uncle" kind of fades into the background when you see him in such a relaxed outfit. It kills the business-like mood and all that.
I walk inside, looking around the spacious, bright lobby, which I've seen many times before—Adam used to have his own apartment here, but he quickly got tired of it and left for his own house, giving it to the first angel he came across, so I knew the layout of this building perfectly. The lobby was decorated with gold and a white, marble-like stone. Although these colors are extremely common in Heaven, the residents here are not fools and try to play with them in different ways, so it doesn't get as boring as it might seem at first glance.
I walk up to the counter, where a concierge is sitting (who, by the way, volunteered to be a concierge, which once again made me think that the "divine selection" in Heaven really works very poorly), and lean in so he can hear me.
"Yo, Dak, I'm here for Emily. Can you tell me how to find her?" I was somewhat acquainted with this concierge from Adam's time, so this kind of familiar behavior was the norm.
"Adam? Oh, yes, one moment..." Dak looked like an anthropomorphic starling, which was normal for Heaven, but I personally preferred those who retained a human form (fucking furries…). For a couple of seconds, he looked at something in his huge ledger, then turned his gaze to me.
"Apartment 271, that's the 17th floor." There were 16 apartments on each floor in this residential complex. Adam used to live in 319 because he wanted to live higher up.
"How are you doing?" I decide to continue our short conversation, because for some reason it triggered a bout of nostalgia from Adam's surging memories. Yeah, it would be so good to go back to those distant, carefree times, when Hell didn't have such a strong influence on Earth, Eve was hiding somewhere, and Adam's only real concern was killing as many sinners as possible…
"I'm fine, thinking of going on vacation. To be honest, it's gotten a little boring in the last hundred years or so. And you moved out, so there are far fewer drunken brawls and fun parties here," he chuckled, making me smile too. Yeah, it was fun. I should go to another party sometime, the ones my exorcists sometimes throw. I had almost no such experience in my past life, and in this one, I just haven't done it in a long time.
"Well, that's good," I support Dak. "Hang out at the sea for a year or two, get a tan, you're so pale," I smirk. Dak had completely white skin and equally snow-white plumage.
"Very fucking funny," the concierge nevertheless chuckled. "Alright, get back to your business, or I could keep you here for hours, talking about all sorts of nonsense."
"Okey-dokey, see you later, buddy," waving goodbye to him, I head to the elevator. Okay, room 271, that means the 17th floor… There were four elevators in the building, just for convenience. Inside, it was made of a white, shining metal, with a huge mirror covering the entire wall. I get in and press the button with the number "17". A few tens of seconds—and that's it, I'm there. In human elevators, such a journey would have taken forty seconds, if not more.
What can I say about the corridors here? Minimalism—white and gold, as usual. The floor has a soft, white carpet with beautiful symbols embroidered in gold, and on the walls, there are periodically beautiful golden lamps with white, matte glass shades or something like that. The apartment doors were made of a shining white metal with large, golden numbers.
Reaching apartment 271, I stopped, gathering my thoughts. There was a little bit of anxiety, and I could snatch this Fruit from her by force at any moment, but I really don't want to bring it to that.
Knock-knock-knock.
"Yes?" After a few tens of seconds of waiting, Emily's sleepy voice was heard, and her cute, disheveled face appeared in the crack of the slightly opened door. Ah, right, it's already late evening… Oops?
"Hey, kiddo, did I wake you?" I smile at her awkwardly.
"No, I wasn't asleep yet…" the girl answered, flinching for a second when she saw me, but immediately composing herself. Yeah, she was definitely shown how I "enjoy" the killings… "Why did you come?" she threw me a wary look, which she desperately tried to hide.
"I came to talk about the Fruit of Knowledge, Eve, and the Exterminations. You don't mind?" You always have to be honest and direct with young people, so they feel that they are trusted and considered equals. That's just psychology, and it seems to work with Emily too. Look how surprised she was by my directness. "May I come in? I heard you make some good tea…"
"Ahem, y-yes…" Not understanding how to react to all this, Emily finally opened the door, still staring at me with wide eyes. After which she shook her head and, waiting for me to pass, looked at me with the same distrust and wariness.
"Cute," The Seraph was dressed only in a thin T-shirt and short shorts, which led me to the thought that local girls sleep in this way far too often. But my comment, of course, was not about her appearance, but about her apartment. The walls were a gentle purple, to the left was a large wardrobe for clothes and shoes, to the right—a full-length mirror. The hallway was divided into three parts: to the left, apparently, was the bathroom, a little further—the toilet, ahead—the kitchen combined with the living room, and to the right—her bedroom. On the walls hung posters of some popular show in Heaven, and at the entrance, on a small table, sat a small teddy bear with bright yellow fur.
"Thanks…" Emily was embarrassed, either shy of her "childish" apartment, or I'm really irresistible (which is unlikely, considering what Eve could have told her about me).
Actually, it wasn't customary to take off your shoes in Heaven. Because, despite the angel's country of residence in life, in Heaven itself the streets were crystal clear. You could literally eat off the local sidewalk, and there would be no problems. That's just the specifics of Heaven. But for me, because of my past, human life, it was customary to walk around the house barefoot, so I decided to take off my shoes, which I did while Emily was awkwardly shuffling at the entrance.
"So, are you going to offer a guest some tea? Or are we just going to stand at the entrance like two statues?" I chuckle at her behavior after I put my shoes on a special shelf.
"O-of course! Tea?" the girl almost jumped, looking at me anxiously.
"Let's have some," I wink at her, then follow a nervous Emily to the kitchen, where she turns on an electric kettle, and I sit down at a small dining table. "So, I think you have some questions for me, don't you?"
"Yes…" For a moment, a multitude of different feelings flickered across her face, after which she became serious. "You… You kill them!" she even pointed her thin finger at me. "You exterminate innocent souls in Hell! Without giving them a chance for redemption!" In Emily's voice, there was not just resentment, but real, righteous anger. It might be difficult, but I'll do my best…
"Emily," I calmly interrupted her, looking her straight in the eye. "I was talking about questions, not statements, remember?" and now—my most disarming smile, to throw her off balance.
"Ahem…" the girl choked with indignation, then, gathering her strength, she finally continued. "Why do you kill sinners? Eve showed me how you do it… You even get pleasure from it! How can you do that?!"
"Emily, a second ago you said we kill 'innocent souls.' And now you're saying we kill sinners. Don't you think you're a little confused in your testimony?"
"…"
"Sinners, over the last hundred years, due to one very cunning plan of Eve's, have started arriving in Hell in simply huge, colossal numbers," I sighed. This topic really pissed me off. "And the number of sinners directly affects the power of the local demons and 'overlords'—the elite of these very sinners."
"But that's no reason to kill them!" Emily sharply interrupted me, her cheeks flushed with anger.
"Yes, it's not a reason. But what is, then? You do understand that we, as creatures of pure Light, simply cannot do such things without a really, very good reason? Do you really think that Sera would allow such a thing if she had any other choice?"
"…" On Emily's face was a visible desperate struggle between her faith in Sera and what Eve had shown and told her. Poor girl, she's too impressionable, and that was sad.
"Did you know that seven years ago, the sinners rebelled?" Unlikely, since this information was carefully hidden from ordinary angels, and especially from her, so as not to cause unnecessary panic.
"R-rebelled?" the girl's eyes became like two huge saucers. I see. "But how? Why?"
"Emily, you just fell for Eve's manipulations. She even showed you how the 'exterminations' happen, didn't she? But she could have just generated any picture she needed, or, at the very least, highlighted the accents she needed to confirm her words."
"Yes, I understand, but…"
"But you still lost faith in the very idea of Light, because how can you kill while being on the side of good, right?" I sighed heavily, seeing the confusion and pain on the young Seraph's face.
"Listen to me, please. I'm not trying to convince you of anything. I'm just telling you what I know myself. We are really trying to solve this problem in a different, more peaceful way," I held out my hand, and a small but very detailed illusion of a notable building immediately appeared above my palm. "This place is called the 'Hazbin Hotel'," the picture changed, and now it showed a view from the inside, where a awkwardly smiling Charlie stood in the lobby. "In it, the princess of Hell herself, with our support, is trying to redeem the souls of sinners," the picture changed again. Angel, Pentious, Husk, and the other residents of the hotel. "As you can see, they are all trying. And I'm sure that when we succeed, we will be able to truly help them all get on the right path. But…" a moment, and the illusion changes again, now it shows a huge battlefield: thousands of sinners are fighting with exorcists. They don't stand a chance, because they can't harm the exorcists. At least, that's what Emily thinks, but the battlefield changes again, and now she sees Carmilla Carmine blowing off the head of Harfy—that very nameless exorcist from the canon. "They are killing us, Emily. They are fighting us. And the more of them there are, the stronger they become. And the more angels die. We cannot allow that," I gently placed my hand on Emily's palm, who was watching all this with disbelieving horror. "Emily, I… we… we are really trying to make all this end as soon as possible. But we just don't have any other, more effective options right now. But we don't kill everyone. Only those who pose a real threat," now my illusion shows the very moment when Vaggie, while still an exorcist, let that cannibal-dwarf go. Yes, a white lie was simply necessary here... For now... "Listen to me, please. Eve showed you all this as some one-sided, senseless massacre, carried out only for our pleasure, but believe me, I hate this part of my job. If I had my way, all the Darkness would have long since disappeared from this world, giving us all the opportunity to live in peace and harmony, like here, in Heaven. And I am working towards making that disappear for good, it's just… it doesn't happen with a snap of your fingers…"
"..." Emily was silent for a long time, then she looked down at my hand resting on her palm, and then… she burst into tears. Oh, these teenagers… Everything is always so complicated with them…