Chapter 26: The Joke About Getting Out of Prison
2022-07-14 Author: I'm Just a Pigeon
"Old Tom? Are you in the back?"
A deep, almost oppressive voice rang out from the pub ahead. Then, William saw a man nearly four meters tall walk through the pub's back door toward them.
In front of this visitor, Old Tom, who wasn't very tall to begin with, looked like a schoolboy. William wasn't faring much better—compared to the man before him, his own height was barely an improvement.
Giant—the word instantly flashed through William's mind.
But he dismissed the thought in the next moment.
Giants were not a protected species among wizards and couldn't possibly appear in normal wizarding society. Some in the Wizarding World enjoyed hunting dragons or giants for sport; Azkaban held a few such individuals.
Compared to him being a giant, it was more likely that the man had been afflicted by some dangerous dark magic or a curse.
At this thought, William relaxed a little. Since the man knew Old Tom, it was clear there wouldn't be any conflict. Therefore, his enormous size shouldn't be a warning sign of danger.
"Hagrid, why are you here so early today?"
Old Tom greeted him enthusiastically, and the name instantly made William recall the man's identity.
The visitor's immense height had made it difficult for William to see his face clearly, but now that Old Tom had spoken, he managed to recognize familiar features on the man's hairy face.
Alright, so much for his previous theories. The man was a giant after all, albeit a half-giant—a hybrid of human and giant.
Although William seemed to have heard about similar topics somewhere, now was clearly not the time for research.
Before he could figure out how to greet him, William was startled by Hagrid's gesture of greeting.
The half-giant bent down and placed a hand, four times the size of a normal man's, on Old Tom's shoulder, patting it lightly. William swore he saw Old Tom's legs tremble.
"I'm heading to Diagon Alley to look for some hair conditioner. The Centaurs asked me to go; they're having a feast soon, and a few of the lads think their tails aren't flowy enough."
As expected of the expert who could raise a Blast-Ended Skrewt, to have such a good relationship with the Centaurs—that Fellow Prisoner would probably cry with envy if he knew.
"Have a drink first, then?"
Old Tom straightened his back again.
"No, thanks, I should get my shopping done first. We can talk after I find the conditioner. I forgot last time, and those lads complained for three days straight."
"That's fine too. By the way, let me introduce you to someone. This might be your future colleague. He'll also be working for Hogwarts for the next year."
"Oh? A new Professor?" He looked at William and extended his hand.
"I'm Hagrid, Rubeus Hagrid, Groundskeeper at Hogwarts."
William looked at the massive hand before him and, steeling himself, reached out with his own.
"Li William. I haven't officially started yet. I'll be the Professor for the Magical Self-Defense class."
Hagrid gently shook William's hand—though it still made William feel like a schoolboy—while scratching his head with his other hand.
"Oh, Magical Self-Defense—I remember now, Dumbledore mentioned it. I remember you. Dumbledore said you might be the best professor for this course in the last five years."
Such high praise?
William felt that if he could just survive the first year, the risk of being fired would be almost nonexistent.
Of course, this was also likely related to the school's inability to find a new teacher.
Before William could say anything modest, Hagrid had already continued on his own:
"If Dumbledore says you're the best professor, then there's no doubt you're the best professor. I've got to go buy that potion. We can have a good few drinks when I get back."
Before William could agree or refuse, Hagrid had already strode to the entrance of Diagon Alley. He turned, gave them a wave, and stepped into the alley.
"He's always like that, a real whirlwind, but he's not a bad person. You'll understand once you get to know him."
"I agree with the first half of your sentence, but let me think about the second half—after all, the Magical Self-Defense professor at Hogwarts is expendable."
William stuttered slightly before managing to say the course's current name, but he would never mention its original name on his own initiative.
"Alright, but I sincerely hope you can last a while. A professorship at Hogwarts is a good job. There aren't many professions that will accept a wizard straight out of Azkaban—and I'd rather you not go back to smuggling."
"Don't worry. If worse comes to worst, I can still make a living buying and selling Potions," William said with a wave, preparing to head back to his room.
His break time was about over. He should get back to poring over those books.
But Old Tom grabbed his arm, stopping him.
"You've had enough time with your books. You finally managed to learn Apparition today; you should give yourself a proper break. Go for a stroll in Diagon Alley. If you really want to relax, the alley next to Knockturn Alley is a good spot."
Old Tom had a mischievous look on his face, but he was determined to stop him.
This made William give up on the idea of returning to his room to bury himself in books. A balance between work and rest wasn't a bad thing. If he really kept this up, he might end up collapsing from exhaustion.
Taking this opportunity to get a set of formal robes tailored was also a good option.
Although formal robes were only a suggestion on the clothing list, William figured he would be at Hogwarts for at least a few holidays, and following local customs was a good idea.
Additionally, getting a more serious-looking robe was also essential. He had a young-looking face, which was fine for dealing with the lower years, but when it came to the senior students, his appearance was indeed a bit unconvincing.
He had no experience with Hogwarts, so he could only use ordinary high school students of a similar age as a reference.
From eleven to seventeen or eighteen, the age gap was quite large. Mischievous, rebellious, suffering from delusions of grandeur, and pretending to be mature—students in this age range were the most troublesome.
Tapping open the entrance to Diagon Alley with his wand, William couldn't help but feel a headache coming on.
He had been too focused on his review before to think about it, but now that he considered it carefully, dealing with these students wouldn't be any easier than dealing with that curse—both were deadly jobs.
"For goodness' sake, why was I in such a rush to get out of prison? I could have just stayed quietly with the Dementors—never mind. Compared to the Dementors, I'd rather deal with these huge problems."
Thinking of the Dementors, William couldn't help but shiver.
Compared to those Dementors, the current difficulties were nothing. At least here, he could still see hope. But being with Dementors, even for just the few minutes they were feeding, would make a normal wizard lose all happiness and hope.
"I hope the teaching won't be too difficult. Otherwise, on the day my scheduled prison term was supposed to end, I'll definitely tell that joke in front of all the students."
William shook his head, dispelling the memories from his mind. Thinking of the joke about getting out of prison, he couldn't help but laugh.
(end of chapter)