Chapter 19 – The Distance Between Us
Sang Zhi had always thought that growing up would make everything easier. People said that once you became an adult, you could make your own decisions freely, without waiting for permission or fearing disapproval. But standing at the window of her dorm room, staring at the city lights far beyond the campus walls, she realized adulthood only meant making harder choices—alone.
Duan Jiaxu hadn't been calling as often these days. It wasn't deliberate—at least, she hoped it wasn't—but Sang Zhi could feel the subtle distance between them, like a thread being stretched too far. He was busy with work, and she was buried in her studies. Whenever they did talk, there were small pauses, words that felt as though they were tiptoeing around something unspoken.
Her phone buzzed. A message lit up the screen:
[Jiaxu]: Are you eating well? Don't skip meals.
Sang Zhi smiled faintly at the simplicity of it. It was so him—concern first, conversation second.
[Sang Zhi]: I am. You? You sound tired.
The typing bubble appeared for a long time before his reply came:
[Jiaxu]: Just a bit busy. Don't worry about me.
But she did worry. She worried about how hard he worked, about whether he was eating properly, about the shadow of the past he still carried. And most of all, she worried whether this quiet, careful affection between them could withstand the pull of time and distance.
---
Later that evening, her friend Yang Er called her out for a late-night snack. The campus streets were still alive with the chatter of students, the aroma of skewers and spicy noodles filling the air.
"You've been staring at your phone like it's going to grow legs," Yang Er teased, nudging her shoulder. "Is it that guy again?"
Sang Zhi's ears flushed pink. "What guy?" she deflected, though the answer was obvious.
Yang Er sighed dramatically. "Honestly, you two act like you're not even together. Is this a romance or a long-distance pen-pal exchange?"
Sang Zhi bit her lip, unsure how to answer. They hadn't really defined anything. He hadn't said the words, and neither had she. There were only gentle looks, late-night calls, and the kind of warmth that lingered even when unspoken. Was that enough?
---
Meanwhile, in another part of the city, Duan Jiaxu leaned back in his chair, rubbing his tired eyes. The glow of his computer screen reflected on his face as he worked through yet another late-night project. His phone sat on the desk within arm's reach, but he didn't pick it up again.
He wanted to call her. He wanted to hear her laugh, to reassure her that nothing was wrong. But what could he say when he wasn't even sure of his own future? He'd spent so many years building stability out of nothing, trying to be someone reliable—someone she could lean on, not someone who added to her burdens.
"Just hold on a little longer," he murmured to himself, as if Sang Zhi could hear him through the night.
---
When Sang Zhi returned to her dorm, she lay awake staring at the ceiling. She thought about their childhood memories, about the way he'd always treated her as if she were someone precious. Now that she was grown, she wanted to prove that she could stand by his side, not as a little sister figure, but as someone who could choose him fully.
Yet the silence between them tonight felt heavier than before.
She reached for her phone, typed a message, and hovered over the send button:
[Sang Zhi]: Jiaxu… are we okay?
But after staring at it for a long moment, she deleted the words and locked the screen.
Outside the window, the city pulsed with life, but Sang Zhi felt the space between them stretching, fragile and uncertain—like a thread waiting to snap or to be pulled close again.
End of Chapter 19