Rhaine had a plan.
Not the kind of plan you'd write down or even admit to having, but one that quietly took shape in her head while she stared at the ceiling the night before.
She was going to drown herself in noise. In people. In activities. In anything that would keep her mind too busy to wander back to Sam's stupid, sharp little question:
Do you always hide the parts of yourself you don't want people to see?
The answer was obviously yes but saying it out loud would feel like peeling her own skin. So instead, she'd make it look like she was just… living her life. Just a normal, busy high school girl. Not hiding from anything. Not overthinking anything. Certainly not overthinking her.
---
The next morning, Rhaine got to school earlier than usual. The air was still cool, the sun barely warm, and the courtyard was quieter than she was used to. She spotted Maya and Eli leaning against the front gate, chatting half-heartedly between yawns.
"Morning!" Rhaine greeted them with a brightness that made both of them pause.
Maya narrowed her eyes. "What's wrong with you? You're way too chipper for 7:15."
"Yeah," Eli added, rubbing his eyes. "Usually you look like you fought a war with your alarm clock."
"I'm just… in a good mood," Rhaine replied, shouldering her bag. "And I think we should sign up for the volunteer booth at the school fair."
Maya blinked. "The school fair? That's like… three weeks away. You've never cared about the fair before."
"Since now," Rhaine said quickly. "It'll be fun. We can work the games booth or help set up the food stalls. Lots of people, lots of noise"
"Lots of work," Maya cut in. "You okay?"
"I'm fine. I just think it'd be… good for us."
Eli gave her a slow, knowing smile. "Translation: good for you."
Rhaine ignored him and started walking toward the main building. She didn't need them poking at her motives the whole point was to look like she had no motives at all.
---
Her plan worked for most of the morning. She kept herself busy: talking to classmates she barely knew, volunteering to help carry boxes for a teacher, even sitting through an entire conversation about the student council's budget without letting her mind drift.
But at lunch, the universe decided to test her.
The cafeteria was its usual chaos chairs scraping, trays clattering, Maya telling a ridiculous story about her cousin's birthday party disaster while Eli acted it out dramatically. Rhaine was mid-laugh when she felt a presence slide into the empty seat beside her.
"Hey," Sam said casually, like she hadn't just materialized out of nowhere.
Rhaine froze for half a second before forcing a smile. "Oh. Hi."
Maya glanced between them but didn't comment at least not yet.
Sam leaned her elbows on the table, eyes on Rhaine. "You've been scarce lately. Busy with something?"
"Yeah," Rhaine said quickly, stabbing at her food. "Fair stuff. Projects. Life."
Sam tilted her head. "Life, huh? That's vague."
Rhaine shrugged without looking up. "Not everything needs an explanation."
"That's true," Sam replied, her tone light but her gaze steady. "But some things do."
Before Rhaine could respond, Maya jumped in, a little too cheerfully. "Speaking of explanations tell Sam about your big fair idea."
Rhaine shot her a warning glare. "It's not a big idea. Just… volunteer work."
Sam's smile curved slowly, like she could see the edges of Rhaine's discomfort. "Keeps you busy," she said. "And keeps you away."
Rhaine looked up sharply. "What's that supposed to mean?"
"Nothing," Sam replied with a shrug, sipping her drink. "Just an observation."
The conversation shifted as Eli launched into another one of his dramatic retellings, and soon Maya was laughing so hard she nearly choked. But Rhaine barely heard any of it. Sam's words echoed in her head like an irritating song you couldn't stop humming.
Keeps you away.
---
Classes passed in a blur after that. Every time Rhaine glanced around, she swore she caught Sam watching her. Not in an obvious, creepy way just a quick, unreadable glance before looking back at her notes.
When the final bell rang, Maya and Eli headed to the gym for their club meeting, leaving Rhaine to pack her bag alone. She thought she was safe until the footsteps came.
"You know," Sam said, leaning against the desk beside hers, "avoiding me doesn't really make the questions go away."
Rhaine didn't look up. "I'm not avoiding you."
Sam's eyebrow lifted. "Then what are you doing?"
"I'm just… busy. That's all."
Sam's smile was small, almost gentle. "Busy proving something to yourself?"
The air between them felt heavier than the quiet classroom around them.
Rhaine zipped her bag and stood up, slinging it over her shoulder. "I don't know what you're talking about."
"Sure you do."
That simple statement sent a flicker of irritation or maybe panic through her chest. She opened her mouth to argue, but Sam stepped aside, letting her pass.
"See you around, Rhaine," Sam said softly.
Rhaine walked out without looking back, but the words clung to her all the way home.
---
That night, lying on her bed with the faint sound of her neighbor's TV bleeding through the walls, Rhaine thought about how ridiculous this all was.
She wasn't avoiding Sam. She was just… spending more time with her friends. Doing more activities. Meeting more people. That was healthy, wasn't it?
It had nothing to do with the way Sam's eyes seemed to look right through her. Nothing to do with the sudden, stupid flutter in her stomach when Sam sat beside her.
And it definitely had nothing to do with the fact that, somewhere deep down, a part of her recognized that flutter for what it really was.
No. That was impossible. She wasn't
Rhaine rolled over and buried her face in her pillow. The thought fizzled before it could finish.
If she didn't name it, it wasn't real.