The road to the tavern felt heavier than the first time. Not because his steps were more tired, but because every moment was burdened with a new fear: the fear of dying again. Renji's stomach was clenched like a claw, and every whisper of the wind carried the same question: How did I die?
He leaned on the stick he had found by the roadside and stared at his trembling hands.
—"It wasn't poison… it wasn't a dagger… I didn't feel anything. Just… the end. Instantaneous."
He bit his lip until he tasted blood.
—"If I step inside again… if I eat again… if I drink… will I just drop dead once more, like a fool? And yet… I need to know. I can't run from this."
The plain stretched before him, and between the hills appeared the familiar silhouette of the tavern, just as dusty, just as quiet as before. Thin smoke rose lazily from the chimney, as if nothing had changed. But for Renji, it was like staring into the maw of a dragon.
He pulled his hood tighter over his face, took a deep breath, and whispered to himself:
— "This time… I have to be careful. To observe. To find out what kills me, or I'm lost forever."
And with his heart pounding like a mad drummer, he took another step toward the door that could be both his salvation and his end.
The warm glow of the lamps struck him again. The same scene, the same play repeated: crowded tables, laughter, the smell of stew and wine. No one paid him any mind. No one knew he had lived this once already.
He sat at the secluded table. Within moments, the woman appeared, wearing the same friendly smile.
— "Good day, stranger. Would you like today's special? Stew and fresh bread, with a glass of wine on the house."
Renji stiffened. "The same words… the same gestures. Everything's a perfect copy." He swallowed hard and answered:
— "Yes… sure."
The steaming plate was placed before him. Stew, bread, red wine. Identical. Too identical. Renji clenched his fists under the table. "I won't eat… not this time. Just observe."
Minutes passed. Nothing happened. People ate, laughed. Everything seemed normal.
Hunger tore at his stomach. The spoon beckoned him. The wine tempted him. "If I don't taste it… I'll never know what kills me."
He lifted the spoon, trembling. Brought it to his lips. The warm, salty flavor spread through him, comforting, familiar. He bit into the bread. He sipped the wine.
Exactly as before.
And then, the end. Instantaneous. No pain, no sound. A lifeless body, collapsed like a puppet with its strings cut. The world unraveled, light shattered.
Renji woke again.
In front of him, the same gates of Marvek, the same cold stone, the same empty road. The air smelled the same, the sun fell the same, the wind rustled the same. Everything was identical. Too identical.
And then terror struck.
He didn't scream. He didn't make a sound. His throat felt dry, as if his screams had already been stolen by someone else, somewhere else. Instead, he covered his face with his hands and began to laugh briefly, suffocated, like a man who had lost all sense of reality.
— "It's… the same… everything… the same… over and over…"
His hands dropped, his eyes clouded as he stared at the gates. He no longer knew if it was the second time, the third, the tenth. Time had dissolved into a heavy fog.
Suddenly, he jumped to his feet and started running. Not because he knew where he was going. Not because he had a plan. But because if he stood still, if he remained motionless for even a moment, he felt he would collapse into the void and never rise again.
The road burned beneath his feet. His breath tore through his chest. He was no longer a man running, just an empty shell driven by instinct.
—"If I die again… I won't come back." The thought appeared on its own, clear, cold, sharp as a knife. It pulsed in his skull, repeating, pounding against his temples: "If I die again… that's it. That's it. THAT'S IT."
He stopped suddenly, collapsing to his knees at the roadside. He dug his fingers into the dirt, trying to feel if it was real. He clawed at it, tore it, smelled it, his eyes wide.
— "Is it real? Or… is it all a lie? Am I waking up? Or just dying… and dying… and dying…"
Slowly, he lifted his gaze. The gates still stood in the distance, the same. An absurd silence enveloped him. And in that silence, a face lit up in his mind: sensei.
—"Sensei… you… how did you do it? How did you stand tall… when Miyu and Airi… when they were gone? I… I can't even breathe without feeling like I'm breaking in half. How did you face the pain? How did you remain human?"
He saw the image of his sensei—cold, unshaken, eyes betraying nothing, not even when the world around him burned. Then Miyu's smiling face. Airi's laughter. Then their fallen bodies, lifeless.
Renji felt his heart clench until it nearly burst. He pressed his hands to his temples, tearing out strands of hair, blood trickling faintly down his scalp.
— "Tell me, sensei… where are you now? What are you doing? How do you endure?!"
His eyes filled with tears, but he laughed. He laughed and cried at the same time, a horrifying, broken sound, neither human nor beast.
He rose slowly, staggering like a drunk. In his eyes was only a small flame, but one that burned dangerously.
He knew, if he entered the tavern once more and died, there would be no return.
And yet, something still called him back.
[POV Takamura Haruki (Renji's Sensei — after Renji ran away from Drenna)]
I walked toward Renji's house with a strange feeling tightening my chest. A restlessness without a clear reason, but my instincts never failed me. With each step, the tension grew, and my mind refused to stay calm.
When I reached the house, my heart clenched. The door was ajar. The light inside was gone. Normally, I wouldn't have panicked right away, but something was wrong.
And then I heard it.
A rustle, a hiss, a murmur… Renji. His voice was trembling, but clear. It came from behind the house. I didn't hesitate. I sprinted along the side path, adrenaline surging through my veins, every reflex sharp as a drawn blade.
My breath was ragged, eyes scanning the shadows, hands gripping my sword. Each step guided by instinct, fear, and concern. If something had happened to Renji, I could never forgive myself.
When I reached the back, I froze for a moment. Renji lay on the ground, utterly broken, wounded, his clothes torn and bloodied. Beside him, Miyu and Airi lay motionless, lifeless. A massive knot formed in my chest, my breath stolen.
Shock made me tremble, but I had to be strong for him. Not for myself, not to hide my pain, but because Renji needed to see that someone could still anchor him to reality, even when everything seemed lost.
— "Renji… you must leave the city at once. Go to the city of Lioren, in the kingdom of Tarhal," I told him. "Everything that happened… everyone will believe it was you. There's no time to explain."
His eyes were vacant, gaze hollow, but I caught a spark of recognition. It was hard to stay stern, but I had to. I had to pull him back, to keep him from drowning completely in despair.
I took a deep breath, suppressing the horror and fury within me, and continued, firm:
— "And… there, you must seek a seer. Her name is Eris. She will help you. Tell her who sent you, tell her what happened. But be careful… the Imperials will be hunting you, along with bounty seekers. Don't waste time."
In my mind, the truth shook me: if he hadn't lied about Kaede, then Eris was his only salvation now. The only one who could help him escape the chaos that consumed him, the only one who could give him a chance to survive.
I watched him gather the last shreds of strength. He trembled, but for the first time, a spark of determination lit in his eyes. Renji blinked rapidly, then slipped into the house with hurried steps. His movements were chaotic, but effective. I didn't intervene. I knew he would do exactly as I said.
Left alone at the back of the house, I gazed at the shadows of night settling everywhere. I took a few steps toward where Miyu and Airi lay. My heart tightened with a pain I had never felt before. I knelt beside them, trying to absorb the crushing reality.
I let the tears fall freely. I trembled, not from cold or exhaustion, but from guilt. If Kaede truly had done what Renji said… if he had turned into a demon… then all of this was my fault. All the madness creeping into Renji's life, all the chaos threatening him, all the evil that had struck these children, it was my fault.
— "All of it… it's all my fault…" I whispered through sobs. "If Kaede did this… if all it took was for him to vanish and become what he is now… then… all of this… all of this rests on my shoulders…"
And deeper still, I felt fear for what was to come. Everyone would believe Renji was behind this. Kaede was no longer here to explain, and Renji's screams had likely already alerted neighbors. All eyes would turn on him, and no one would understand the truth.
I bent closer to them, trying to stifle my shaking, but the tears wouldn't stop. Guilt tore at me, despair clutched my heart with unseen claws. Deep in my mind, I knew Renji's only chance was to reach Lioren and find Eris… but that didn't lessen the horror and guilt devouring me now.
— "Renji… I sent you toward hope… but if I'm wrong… if you don't reach Eris… it will all be… it will all be your end… everyone's end…" I whispered, my broken voice dropping tears onto the cold ground beside the helpless bodies of the children.
I hadn't yet lifted my gaze from their still forms when I heard heavy steps on the gravel. The sound jolted my heart. In seconds, I realized, someone had come to see what happened.
I looked up and saw the silhouette of a guard approaching the yard. He wore standard armor, and the scabbard of his sword gleamed faintly under the moonlight. With each step, the tension grew, knowing that one wrong move could turn this into disaster.
When the guard reached me, he stopped abruptly, eyes widening at the bodies beside me. His hand leapt instinctively to his scabbard. In a heartbeat, his sword was drawn, gleaming threateningly in the pale light.
— "Who did this?!" the guard shouted, his voice heavy, threatening, blade raised.
A knot twisted in my stomach. If I said I didn't know, all suspicion would fall immediately on Renji. The neighbors and guards would judge him guilty without hesitation. I couldn't let him bear that blame.
I took a deep breath, heart racing wildly, "I trust Renji," I told myself, and chose to take all the guilt.
— "…It… it was me," I said, my voice trembling but firm. "I drank too much… I lost control… I'm sorry. This should never have happened."
The guard stared, surprised, searching for lies in my face, but I stood unmoving, letting the responsibility crash down on me. As much as the pain and guilt tore at me, I knew it was the only way to protect Renji.
I felt the tension ease slightly around us, the guard still hesitant, but my calm admission held him back from rash action.
In my mind, though, it was clear: if Kaede really did what Renji said, if he truly had a pact with a demon… it was still my fault. But at least now, Renji had a chance to survive.
I had barely finished confessing when my senses were assaulted by heavy footsteps and armed shadows. In an instant, more guards emerged from the darkness, surrounding me from all sides.
Their eyes gleamed under the moonlight, their swords flashing in their hands. Each of their steps pressed heavier on my chest, the air thick with tension. There was no turning back now; my confession had sealed it.
— "Come with us," one of them said coldly, while the others closed in, making sure I wouldn't try to escape.
I tried to breathe deeply, to steady my thoughts, but every fiber of my body trembled. Truth no longer mattered; now, all eyes were on me, each step dragging me closer to what I knew was inevitable: prison.
I was shoved forward, surrounded by armed guards. Their boots weighed down every nerve in me, my heart pounding frantically. Within minutes, we reached a cold, massive building with thick stone walls and small barred windows that seemed to shut out the world. The air was heavy, damp, laden with stone and dust, time itself contracting around me.
Without warning, I was pushed inside, the heavy gate closing with a metallic echo that pierced my chest. I tried to gather my thoughts, to stay calm, but the tension was suffocating.
And then I heard them. Familiar steps, heavy, unsteady, mixed with the smell of wine and alcohol. Kaizen and his group from the tavern entered the chamber, their eyes instantly locking on me. And Kaizen… Kaizen seemed to collapse with shock. His gaze filled with horror, his hands instinctively trembling as they rose.
— "No… it can't be…" he whispered, his voice torn between dread and disbelief. "Takamura? You… YOU did this?"
The tension gripped my chest. Kaizen's eyes spoke what he couldn't say aloud: the disbelief that the man he had respected all his life, the man of honor, his father's closest friend, could be capable of such a thing. Two girls… two lives… and yet I was the one before them.
I tried to read their faces, to grasp their confusion and disbelief, but I knew the truth: I had to take the blame entirely, to protect Renji.
— "Yes… it was me," I said, my voice calm but heavy with guilt. "I lost control… I drank… I'm so sorry."
Kaizen's gaze filled with pain and disappointment, but there was no time for explanations. In my mind, I knew my sacrifice was the only way to give Renji a chance, even if the whole world believed otherwise.