Part 1
I sat on my bed late in the afternoon contemplating where it all went wrong.
I used to be an arrogant kid who saw myself as the main character. I was mean to a certain girl who ended up dating an ex of mine to prove they were both better off without me. Her friend ended up with my childhood crush, whom I had ignored while I chased an aloof girl. Finally, after years of showing off to my sister, she called me a moron and got a girlfriend too.
I felt a deep sense of insult, as if I were invisible to those around me. This unsettling experience unfolded during my middle school years, and now, as I navigate my second year of high school, the memories still haunt me.
I was subjected to a barrage of degrading names—"perv," "scum," and even "an enemy to all women." The words stung, echoing the harsh judgments that often play out in manga and other narratives, carving a painful identity for me in my peers' eyes.
In a misguided attempt to cope with my own feelings of exclusion, I directed my frustration toward another boy, which resulted in my bullying him. This reckless choice led to a month-long suspension, forcing me to stay home from school and face my own growing isolation. It was during this time that my parents seemed to forget about me, leaving me alone with my thoughts while they focused their attention on my siblings.
Instead of providing the support I so desperately needed, they dedicated their energy toward shaping my siblings into exemplary students and morally upright individuals. I felt like a failure in their eyes, lost in the shadows of their expectations and aspirations.
That one-month suspension, along with the cold shoulder and disappointed words being thrown at me, allowed me to contemplate all of this, which led me to regret those choices of mine, and in the end, I ended up alone.
I was isolated from the class, being labelled as a bully and scumbag.
I ended up making no friends, and that took a toll on my self-confidence, which ended with me not making any more friends or rather, I began to have difficulty communicating with others. Everything became harder because I made it like that with my own past actions.
This all happened that day.
In the dining room, my parents chatted with my sister, a childhood friend, and my sister's girlfriend, completely ignoring me. I quietly retreated to my room, finding solace in my own company.
At the dinner table, only my sister and childhood friend acknowledged my return. My sister mumbled with slight annoyance, trying to maintain the cheerful atmosphere. My parents remained oblivious.
My childhood friend, who once found me arrogant and inconsiderate, now noticed my isolation and deepening troubles. She had observed my boredom, nervousness, and growing contempt for myself.
"How is he?" she asked my mother.
"That good-for-nothing son of mine? He's distant and compliant lately," my mother replied, worry creeping into her expression.
"Leave him be; he needs to learn from his mistakes," my mother's partner added.
Yet, despite her frustrations, my mother couldn't shake her concern. She felt a lingering care for the charming son she once had before he became insufferable.
Later that night, as I read manga, there was a knock on my door.
"Hey, are you doing okay?" It was my childhood friend.
What should I say to her?
"Hey, are you awake?"
Crap, just say you're fine.
"I...I am doing fine," I stuttered.
"Yeah, okay, good to know..." I heard her leave. She must hate me, only caring because of my mom.
I'm sorry, Mom. I let you down.
I wanted to apologize, but she went into my sister's room for a sleepover. I almost knocked but cowered out and retreated to my own room.
Early The Next Day
My younger sister went down with my childhood friend to grab a glass of water when they spotted me by the front door, having changed from my pajamas, showered and was wearing casual clothes with a backpack.
They saw as I left without even noticing either of them Staring at my own back.
Part 2
I walked to my grandfather's home in the early morning because I did not want anyone to see me leave wel even if I did leave, they would not care at all in the slightest.
Well, after all, I grew distant from them all after that whole incident.
The reason I went to my grandfather's place was because of something that happened a few months after my suspension.
This was during the time when my parents were out on their dates, and my sister was also on a date with her girlfriend.
I was envious, but after a while, I wondered if I could be envious after all the women he used to have a connection with, either good or bad, are now living their best lives away from me or dissing me badly.
This was around that time when
Ding Dong!....Ding Dong!....Ding Dong!...Ding Dong! Ding Dong! Ding Dong! Ding Dong!
"Okay, okay, okay, okay! I am coming, so stop it, whoever is out there!"
Sigh....
Do they even have to ring the doorbell many times after all, I was coming to answer.
I opened the door, and there stood my grandfather, who was about in his late sixties and early seventies despite the fact that he looked strangely young with only a few wrinkles on his face.
Beside him was a middle-aged woman wearing a secretary's outfit
"Hello there, grandson.....may we come in?"
"Grandfather, what are you doing here?"
"Let me in, and we shall explain it to you."
"We?! What do you mean, and who is this chick with you?!"
"Ohhh, allow me to introduce you to my secretary."
"It is nice to meet you, young master."
The secretary beside him made a bow to me, young master, huh, I will not lie, I like the sound of that, but I doubt I should be bossy with her, so I would not provoke her in any way.
"So may we come in?"
"Of course, come in."
"Thank you, my boy."
The old man and his secretary went in and sat side by side on the couch.
My grandmother, his late wife, passed on when she was forty-three years old, and since then grandfather has been hanging out with some women....I do not see him flirt with them, and he did make me swear not to tell my parents.
Thank goodness I forgot about this for a while, as it allowed my family to be in the dark about this.
My grandfather sat with a happy expression on his face, holding his cane as he sat.
I sat down across from him, and then he began to speak with a calm expression now.
"You have gotten more respectful and kinder than before...I missed that about you when you were in elementary....what changed, huh, my grandson."
"Puberty i guess hehehe."
I gave out that reason because I was ashamed and embarrassed about what happened to me, so I decided to go along with this lie of mine, but from the looks on his face, he seems to have seen through it now.
"Well then, enough about you, let's get down to business, shall we?"
"Yes, we shall begin, sir."
The middle-aged secretary pulled out some documents from her bag and presented them on the table.
The moment I picked up this paper, I knew what it was by the words that I first laid my eyes on.
"What is this? inheritance?"
"Yes, you catch on, grandson."
I could not believe it, but wait.
"Don't you want to wait for mom, dad, and sister to come?"
"Nah, they have their own will, but this one is for you as it is meant to be a secret from them.....also, you seem to refer to them as your mother, father, and sister instead of...okay, let's talk about the will of mine."
My grandfather saw that look in me and decided not to comment on it anymore.....thank you, grandfather.
His own secretary had read the important sections.
"In the event your grandfather dies, you would inherit his house as he considers this a gift to his eldest grandson."
I looked shocked and nearly got excited when a thought crossed my mind.
I put the paper down and looked at my grandfather.
"Why are you giving this house to me and not my...."
"Why am I not giving my house to your mother and father or your sister, huh? Is that correct? Well, they are good folk, and I do not trust them."
"What do you mean, grandfather?"
"Well, that house of mine is special, you see, there is a doorway hidden by the back."
So yeah, he offered me his house, but I still kept wondering why, and the only response he gave was "you need it!"
Even his secretary agreed that I needed his house.
I had some concerns, but decided not to raise them because I was tired of this.
Well, after that talk, he said his goodbyes and left. Then, on the morning of one of the days of me being a first-year high school student, my grandfather died and left some money and things he cherished to my mom, dad, and my sister.
Meanwhile, the ownership of his house, with my signature, was given to me later that night by the secretary in secret.
I didn't get a chance to go because I was busy with school. Lately, I've been feeling drowsy and neglecting exercise, so a walk to my grandfather's house was something I really needed.
Part 3
I arrived at the house, and it looked to be a normal house; it was neither small nor big and was made of average materials, of course.
I did not know why Grandpa wanted me to offer me a house
Is this some sort of way to teach me responsibility?
Even now, I did not understand what my grandfather must have been thinking when he made me move to his house.
"So, do you like the house, young master?"
The secretary of my grandfather was tasked to accompany me
"I have no complaints about having a house, but are you sure you want to live with me?"
"What do you mean your grandfather ordered me to...."
"Do you know what type of person I used to be?"
"No, I do not....."
"Then why would you?"
"What type of person are you now?"
"What?"
"I am asking not what type of person you...used....to be but what type of person you are....now."
"What are you trying to?"
"Your grandfather told me what type of person you are, and yet you are remorseful, you were guilty and did your best, and yet why are you being punished. I wondered, after hearing the full truth, as to why punish a repentant and forgiving person for past actions. The meaning of forgiving those who seek it has become labelled as weakness and not an act of humanity and morals."
"Hic."
"Hey, your grandfather was there for you like he was with me, so allow me to return the favour your grandpa entrusted to me by doing it in his favour."
"Thank you so much.....I....I.....I.....I am so sorry about....."
"It will be okay."
Later in the house, they stood in front of a giant door in the back of the house.
"This is where I lived."
"In this room....why the large door?"
"Why don't you go ahead and take a look?"
"Okay."
I decided to trust her, she is someone who believed in me changing for the better....and so she became like an older sister, a teacher, a counsellor to me.
I then looked at the door, then I went through that door along with my teacher and then...
I saw an amazing out-of-this-world event.
Everything was different their were now blue skies and no houses surrounding my grandfather's house anymore.
I found the teacher and me on a hill, and from a distance, they lay a large city that was a mix of medieval and European-esque, it was as if they were large towns with a large tower in the centre.
The large town was a large circle with walls that surrounded.
The circumference and radius of the circle would be difficult to measure, as only being able to look at it from a bird's eye view can one see the full circle, and even then, one would have to have a never-ending measuring tape to get the exact radius of the large town.
In the large town stood many civilizations and that brought this spark of wonder.
"Welcome, my young master, to my hometown."
"You lived here, teacher?"
"Teacher?....well, yes, I lived here, but I stayed with my grandfather."
"Teacher, what were you before you met my grandfather?"
"I used to be someone who was struggling in poverty."
"Poverty?"
"Yeah, I used to be the daughter of a baron, but my family were all convicted because of their greed, and the elders were executed for treason."
"Convicted?"
"I do not remember much anymore, but I was around your age when I experienced poverty...my family were the type to always want more money, and so they all sold military weapons and were all tasked in helping the demon lord to raid and destroy this whole town."
"What?"
"I was still six years old when this all happened and their plan went well for many years until the guards of this world captured one of the subordinants of the demon lord and decided to sell out my whole family for the sake of it's freedom, I remembered your grandfather said that it was something the demon lord decided on, because he valued that one subordinant and was willingly to betray my family anytime."
"Ohhh."
"Selling them out shifted the attention of the city, and some demons were able to infiltrate the whole city, and this caused many deaths and wars."
"That all happened many years ago."
"So is this the town that...."
"No...actually I fled to this town because it was the safest."
"What?"
"That whole incident happened up north, or was it south.....honestly i forgot the geopolitical landscape of this world."
"So who won in the end?"
"I do not even remember; it was a traumatic experience for me, everyone was scary, and I did not look back at that city. I then moved to this city that you see in front of you."
"You doing okay now?"
"Managing."
"What, not yes or no?"
"Let's walk and talk, do not worry if monsters are looking to hunt for us, I will protect us."
"Okay, so continue, why not yes or no?"
"That is because it would be a lie to say either."
I kept on listening, wanting to understand the teacher better. Yet from the looks of the teacher, she has this calm face, but her expression looks troubled.
The teacher seemed to have difficulty talking about it, and yet she took a deep breath and let it out, then she looked at me as we walked through the huge city.
"You see, young master, if I were to say I am okay now, that would be a lie since even then I am still afraid of what has happened before..."
"Ohhh."
"But if I were to say I was not, that would be accepting defeat, and the efforts I made were all for nothing, so you see I want to be honest with you...Whenever you experience something and are in the process of healing and moving past that painful experience done either by you or someone else, then deep down your opinion on that past painful experience will, of course, be answered in neutral."
"Does that apply to everyone?"
"No, because there are some who managed to be fully okay, and there are some who managed to get consumed in darkness, either indulging in self-loathing or criminal activity."
"I see....but my problems and pain, unlike you, were all my fault, so the only feelings I can understand are guilt, remorse, and, as you said, self-loathing...teacher, what do I do now?"
"Well, when I was in poverty, afraid of what would happen to me or if I was going to be just like everyone else....your grandfather saw me and recruited me.....that was many years ago, probably before you were born into the world, young master."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah....so I will say the one advice to you like your grandfather said to be after he brought me into his home, fed, made me bathe, offered me clean clothes and shelter...do not focus on the past because that is something you can not change....what you can change are what you are going to do now....your past depressions and future anxieties will never leave but what you can do in the present moment can help you find your peace...but even in the present there will be a fight for control, your positive and negative emotions will never stop until you die."
"So what exactly do you want me to do?"
"Do what is right, follow the virtues and good values taught to you, and live in the present not just for yourself but for others."
"Huh?"
"Tell me now what you feel about everyone who has labelled you a bad guy."
"What do I feel?"
"Yes, tell me now what you feel and how you feel."
I looked at the teacher, we were near the entrance to the large city, and so I stopped, and my teacher understood that I did not want to be seen by anyone else other than her.
"I do not want to be the bad guy, I do not want to be hated, nor do I want to hate anyone. I believe there are second chances, I want to be saved, and I want to.....to....to....to live with you in peace."
"Act with integrity, uphold the virtues and values you were taught, and live in the moment not just for yourself, but for others."
The teacher smiled at me, then she gave me an embrace which brought me crying my hardest.
"You did well, my young master. Now allow me to help you and guide you."
I cried for about half an hour, and my head got fuzzy and numb in the process.
"Now then, young master, let's go apply for citizenship in this world."
"Yeah..."
"Hey."
"What?"
"If you want, you can live in whatever world you want for as many days as you want."
"What?"
"Young master, you are free to do that, but I will always be there to make sure you remain a good and innocent boy."
"Teacher."
I let out a calm and natural smile as we approached the gates of the city, and in my heart.
Thank you, teache and to you, grandpa, for believing in me.
Part 4
One Year Later
"Welcome and hello there, miss...ohhh."
"Why are you here?"
Currently, I am in a convenience store working part-time to earn money for my teacher, when suddenly a young woman approached me.
"Hey!.....is this where you ran away to. You are such a horrible person, you know that!"
"I am sorry if I did anything bad to you before, miss."
I made a bow, attempting to show a polite gesture with a hint of nervousness overtaking my system.
"Huh? Why are you doing this?"
"Whatever do you mean miss?"
"I mean, you disappeared for over a year, and your stuff is gone, so tell me you! Why did you disapper huh? You're looking to make trouble for our mother and father?"
"I mean, I did move, didn't I?"
"Yeah, I noticed, but moved where?"
"I moved to another home with a teacher."
"Who is the teacher? Did you get involved with anything bad?"
"Well, I did manage to steal...."
"Ohhh, so you are a thief, huh?"
"Well, they were an enemy trying to steal military plans from the world government, leading a coup d'tact with the royal family, and orchestrating a slave market."
"What!?"
"So, as ordered in retaliation, I had to steal from them just so we can get the upper hand."
"What on earth are you talking about?"
"Yeah, what on earth am I talking about..."
"Enough with the jokes, what are you doing now?"
"Training recruits, exploring the tower, as well as researching the ancient texts to....."
"What!?"
"What else am I doing now...ohhh yeah serving as a bodyguard for an influential political dynasty,..."
"What?"
"translating that ancient text so we can find a way to win without fighting or death."
"What have you been watching....?"
"Ohhh yeah, taking care of teacher so she can live a carefree life being a..."
"Who on earth is the teacher?"
"She is my best friend and caretaker."
The young woman let out a sigh, and then she started to talk.
"You look so different, you look more lively and strangely nice..."
"Why wouldn't I...I just want to do my work here so I can go home to my teacher."
"What about your mother?"
"What?"
"I hope you, mother, father, and that special someone of yours ends up being okay. I just hope you all remain safe and are doing well."
I made a natural smile, and then, looking at my smile that was not disgusting to her, she began to break down.
"Why are you nice to someone like me? I hurt you and made you sad!... I knew you were remorseful, yet I kept on insulting you and being mean to you."
"Yeah, you did do that, miss."
"Stop calling me miss....please call me your little sister again!"
"Miss, you should know that I accept everything that was said to me and I made do with it."
"Come home, please, I beg of you....I am so so so so sorry!"
"Why do you want me to come home that badly?"
"Because our mother misses you, our father misses you, I miss you....please come home, I am sorry for leaving you alone!"
Random thoughts were plaguing my head as I watched the little woman crying while staring at me, such as 'why should I',' what makes you think I will do that', or even 'you do not deserve me', but I just...
"Yes, okay then....little sister."
"Yes!"
Later, after my shift was finished, I accompany miss ....'s little sister to her....my home now.
When I got to the house, there in the house was my mother serving an old childhood crush of mine, along with some other women whom I had not seen.
Then I looked at my mother and father.
"I am home, mother, father."
They both went to embrace me, and I did the same.
They both asked for some forgiveness from me for ignoring me and leaving me alone, and without thinking, I forgave them because I have no reason not to.
I surprisingly want to go home to my teacher.
"Where have you been all this time?"
My mother asked this, and everyone else listened, but my little sister did not want to because...
"I was with my teacher, dealing with some responsibilities."
"Responsibilities?"
"Yeah, the usual stuff, politics, resource management, linguistics, and treating back pain to teacher."
"What?"
Every answer they asked me during the year I was missing ended up confusing them more. The next day, they met the teacher, and so mother, father, and little sister found out that my words were not a lie as they read the will given to me and also went through the doorway.
In that world, I began to make connections on my own, I even found a job that I enjoyed doing, and I managed to be efficient and diligent in my work.
So to say I believe that the other world helped me to change for the better, and I am very thankful for the opportunity to take a breather and try to redo this life, having learned from my mistakes.
However, I was forced by my parents to finish college first before they would allow me to return to doing business in this other place.
My teacher, mother, and father suggested that this could help me understand various topics, such as economics, politics, and other subjects. I agreed with their point of view.
A few weeks later
I managed to get to my class with the furious glares being targeted at me
I went to my own seat, ignoring the stares, and nonchalantly pulled out my textbooks from my bag.
"So you are back, huh? Where did you go for one whole year? Your suspension was only for one month, so why not come back for a year?"
There was a random woman who came up to me. She seemed like someone I knew, but I forgot....her tone and voice were scary, so I decided to make a polite remark.
"I am sorry, miss, but who are you again?"
"What?"
Just then, my teacher...my teacher, who I cherish as an older sister and someone I trust, has become an actual teacher at my school that stays at school and is known to be everyone's counsellor that people can talk to about their own struggles, such as stress, anxiety, and others.
This is going to be a long time before I am allowed to return to the other world.
But as the teacher said, enjoy the moment while it is there, and so I decided to do this not just for the teacher but for my family members as well, for they began to believe in me.