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On the fourth day, I went to the tourist attraction, Ellis Cathedral. It seems to be a church with a long history.
"Kazuma-san, the stained glass is so beautiful!"
"Oh, that's true."
"You don't seem interested..."
"No, the royal capital is full of educational tourist spots. It's getting a bit monotonous."
"Really? I'm having fun!"
I wonder if Yunyun likes history, because she knows Japanese history, but now that I think about it, she knows absolutely nothing about our local history. I open my guidebook to see if there's anything else I can see. According to it, this church has a permanent confessional and the most beautiful statue of Eris in the world. I think I'll go and check it out.
"Yunyun, let's kill time and go chill in the confessional."
"Just teasing me... well, let's go."
We then headed to the confessional. However, since only one person was allowed in at a time, I had no choice but to send Yunyun ahead. I wonder what she was discussing in the confessional. After a while, Yunyun came out of the confessional. She had a big smile on her face.
"Kazuma-san, I have received God's approval! It seems that God will forgive my betrayal as well!"
"Betrayal? What did you betray?"
"Megumin"
"!?"
For some reason, Yunyun's expression became blank. I'll just leave this alone.
"I'll be next, so wait for me!"
"Kazuma-san, what are you confessing?"
"Just teasing me."
And then I entered the small confessional. The priests of the Eris religion are all stubborn. I'll make fun of them. With that resolve in mind, I knelt down in front of the partition of the confessional.
"Welcome, lost lamb. Confess your sins. God will forgive you."
A young woman's voice came from the other side of the partition. I see, I see...
"I once committed a sin... I spread the underwear of three of my female adventurers on the floor and rolled around in it. Can God forgive me for what I did?"
"Huh? Wait... I think you should confess to your friends first, not to God!"
"By the way, after that, I had a big blast and came all over her."
"What's that?! Are you stupid?! You're an idiot! God would never forgive such immorality!"
Hmm, maybe this sister is inexperienced. If she doesn't master the art of ignoring, she won't be able to do this job. Okay, let's tease her some more.
"He seduces a country girl with no friends and uses her as an outlet for his sexual desires. And that's me..."
"Go away, you apostate!"
"What's going on? Eris-sama, is she such a narrow-minded god that she won't even forgive something like this? If she's like this, then her breasts must be small..."
"Waaaaaaahhhhh!"
The nun kicked the partition and charged towards me. Oh, a loli. I wish she was a voluptuous, sexy nun...
"Calm down, here's some candy."
"Shut up! You're an Axis believer! Get out of here...!"
"Huh? I'll strip you and rape you brat."
"Hii?! I'm sorry, I'm sorry!"
Boring, she's just a brat. I popped the candy into the nun's mouth and left the confessional. Outside, Yunyun was sitting in a chair waiting for me.
"Kazuma-san, how was it?"
"It was fun."
"What's with that childish comment...?"
We then headed to the Central Cathedral to worship the Eris statue, our next objective. When we saw the statue, we honestly cried out in admiration. It was extremely well made. But we soon realized that it was, after all, a product of our imagination.
"It's well done."
"Yeah, and I'm wearing pants."
"Huh? Ah, really..."
The two of them peered up the skirt of the Eris statue. If Lady Eris were to see this scene, she would likely exact divine punishment.
"But, Yunyun, this one is fake."
"Fake? What does that even mean?"
"Look closely! You'll notice something strange!"
Following my instructions, Yunyun began to observe the statue of Eris. I'm sure Yunyun has seen the real Eris before. If so, she should have noticed something strange.
"There's nothing strange about it... Ah..."
"It seems you've guessed, Yunyun."
Yunyun's gaze was fixed on the voluptuous twin hills of the Eris statue. Something was wrong, this was unacceptable. I often looked at the Eris statue's breasts. They weren't padded either. It was definitely fake.
"Hey! Yunyun, look here!"
"What's with the chest of a stone statue... it's really smooth here."
"Maybe it's because you've been touching it so much that it's shiny and smooth. Okay, I'll give it a pat too!"
"Kazuma-san, you're a human being..."
"Hey assistant, what a coincidence we met here."
"?!"
We turned around at the sudden voice and saw the familiar silver-haired thief, Chris.
"Eri... Boss! What are you doing here?!"
"It's fine, now let go of that hand."
"Yes! My hand just slipped! It was beyond my control!"
I let go of the Eris statue's chest. Damn, she's seen me!
"Shall we talk for a moment, Assistant?"
"Hey head!"
I replied without hesitation, and we sat down in nearby chairs. Yunyun kept glancing at Chris. I see...
"By the way, does the boss know Yunyun?"
"Yes, I've spoken to him a few times when he was bored at the guild."
"Is that so, Yunyun?"
"Y-yes! But that's all we're friends about..."
Yunyun looked down and replied, "Really, this lonely Crimson Demon."
"Boss, would you be willing to be friends with this guy?"
"Sure."
"Oh really?"
Yunyun jumped on Chris, who answered casually. Is she really that desperate for friends? It made me sad to watch.
"We're not strangers after all! Nice to meet you!"
"Y-you're welcome!"
Yes, Lady Eris really is a goddess. Not like some useless goddess. Yunyun took Chris' hand and shook it vigorously. Is she that happy...?
"So why is your head here?"
"I'm in the royal capital for a certain reason, but I saw you earlier and followed you."
"Do you have something to do with me?"
"Yes, but it seems like you're in the way right now."
Hearing Chris' voice, Yunyun blushed and looked down. Yunyun is really cute...
"Um, Chris-san, if that's the case, why don't you come and have dinner with us now? We can take care of Kazuma-san after that..."
"Oh! Is that okay? Well then, I'll be happy to help you out for a while!"
So we took Chris to a restaurant and had dinner. We spend every day lavishly, but we never get bored of the food. After dinner, we bought some drinks and snacks and went back to the hotel.
"So, boss, what business do you have with me?"
"..."
Chris closed his eyes in silence, pondered, and then spoke to Yunyun.
"Hey, Yunyun. Can I borrow your assistant for a bit?"
"Please, come on in! We're friends!"
"Okay, I'll borrow it then! I'll be back in about 30 minutes."
Although I was a little annoyed at being treated like an object, Chris led me by the hand and we left the room. Perhaps it was something he didn't want Yunyun to hear about. Chris then dragged me into the guest room next door.
"Hmm? Is your boss staying here too?"
"That's right. What a coincidence."
What a rare coincidence. Well, nothing to be worried about. But, what business is this? The only business Eris-sama has is that one.
"So, I have something to ask of you..."
"I decline."
"Hey, let's at least listen to what you have to say!"
"It's probably related to the sacred artifact, right?"
"That's true, but..."
I thought of a reason to decline. I was traveling at the moment. I didn't want to cause any trouble. Besides, I couldn't leave Yunyun alone.
"Well then, Lady Eris, I guess we weren't meant to meet today."
"At least listen to me, Assistant!"
"Well, it can't be helped."