I've lived in a dark lonely world . I had none to comfort me or atleast love me . That's why when someone showed me even the slightest affection ,I would feel like they gave me the world. It's funny, right ? Having your own parents as your enemies. They beat you up , neglect you and do disgusting things to you. Things that can not be talked about. I Honestly don't care about myself anymore. I'm okay as long as my sister is happy. I work part time jobs to buy her nice clothes and school stuff. I also have to pay the rent or buy us things to eat. My legs ache and my ears hurt from all those screaming customers. But then I get back home and she rushes to give me the warmest hug ever. I would forget about my pain and start cooking for her . My dad would be on the couch drinking beer and watching tv.my mom would be sleeping or just smoking on the couch. I hated the smell of cigarettes but every time I mentioned it she would burn me with the cigarettes. I hated her so much I actually imagined killing her. i imagined it so many times in my head . Killing my mom and dad was my biggest dream. But it was illegal and I didn't want it to affect my sister. My sister never got harmed.i made sure of it. I promised to protect her and give her a normal life but I knew that wasn't possible. I honestly don't understand why they gave birth to us in the first place. Like why did you give birth to us if you knew you were unstable or if you hated children . You don't have to ruin our life's just because you are emotionally immature." What is wrong with them ? " I would ask myself multiple times a day. They weren't okay. They acted like children . They got angry at small things. They refused to go to work and used me "their daughter" as a servant. It was gross .but do you know the worst part that man I once called my father found me " sexy" . Isn't that funny ? Your life is already fucked up but your father just has to make it worse .he disgusted me . He ate like a hungry pig . He looked like a pig .I asked myself if he felt guilty after what he did .I wondered why mom didn't come save me. I wondered why she didn't get angry at him . he is her husband after all. But no she just.....watched. like it was a movie. And the worst part is she even held me down. I screamed and yelled but nothing worked. Thank God they closed the door and lily was playing downstairs. I didn't want her to get worried or even worse... traumatised. I cried a lot that night . It hurt so much . I felt disgusting. I couldn't look at myself anymore more . That night I made up my mind . We had to get out of this house. And I also knew that I can't leave lily home alone with those two. So I took her to work with me and saved up money for months . And I secretly packed our bags and got our documents and passports. We left that night. We went to the other side of the city . On the bus I told myself " I have to do it for lily " the whole time, while she slept on my lap .we finally arrived. I was tired and sleepy but I carried her and called a taxi. He took us to a hotel and me and lily got our selves a room . The woman gave us a room key and we went to our room .we took a nice warm bath and ate the sandwiches I made before coming. Then we finally both slept peacefully. I was exhausted but atleast my lily wasn't in that dirty and disgusting dusty old house. All of it was worth it because she was save from that pedophile bastard. She was happy now . So was I..... I guess.
