Sung-min waited for my response but I didn't give any. I was more concerned about my bruised chin than the load of bull crap he spilled at me just now.
I rubbed my chin and sighed,
"Look what you did," I said. "Next time you want to spring up something you don't even intend on me, give me a heads-up."
His brow arched.
"Excuse me?"
"You're excused," I responded and hissed. I was lucky I didn't bite my tongue.
"Are you really blaming me right now?"
"Of course," I said, shamelessly, and not giving him a chance to refuse taking responsibility. "You're the one who suddenly asked if I wanted to sleep with you. It caught me off guard and then this happened."
He frowned.
Yeah, frown. I was also feeling quite shitty from his words.
"I like you, yes. But I'm not doing all this just to sleep with you. What I'm after is your heart, not your body." I said but then thought briefly with my eyes rolled away. I smacked my lips and rephrased. "Okay, I want your body but that's not it. I want your heart before I want your body."
He looked at me like I was a confusing piece of a puzzle. And then he sighed, his hand on his face as he shook his head.
I was becoming harder and harder to read.
"Look, Sung-min. I... I don't want to just have sex with you and be done. I want to form a relationship with you—"
"Not happening." He shut me down before I could even finish and I gnashed my teeth. I felt so irked all of a sudden.
Was it always this hard dealing with him in the past? I think I'm getting a migraine at the back of my head. Help. This can't be explained scientifically.
"Anyway," I got up from my chair and headed to the kitchen. "You still have to take responsibility," I said, and returned with a little first aid box I bought that afternoon.
First aid was a very essential need.
Especially since I need it to make little moves towards Sung-min if I get hurt a little. I inwardly cackled evilly.
"What sort of responsibility?" He asked and I grinned.
Now we're talking.
Stop being such a stuck-up bitch sometimes, Sung-min. I'm going to be your future husband, y'know.
"Help me take care of this." I pointed at my chin.
It was red and throbbing.
"I can't do it on my own because I don't have a mirror yet." I grinned, victoriously. "And since you caused it, you have to be the one to fix it."
"Choi Joon-ho, I don't fix things." He suddenly said. "These hands only know how to destroy."
He said it in such a deep and sorrowful way that anyone would back away, feeling sorry for him. But not me.
I dropped the first aid on the table.
"Well, there's a first time for everything," I said. "Now, come over here and help me."
The dinner I was supposed to have... I decided to put it off for a bit. Very soon, Sung-min would walk away.
He would walk out that door without looking back and start his patrol around the area.
And when that happens, when I'm once again alone in this big space, then... I can have my meal.
At least, it'll help me while away time. Though, I can't say I won't think of him and get so depressed that the food might have a little hard time going down my throat.
"Come on, what are you waiting for?" I asked. "Or should we do it in the living room?" I picked up the box. "I think that should do."
He simply stared with his cold gaze.
Well, I figured. If he wasn't going to move his feet then I might as well help him move.
I held his hand, my warmth permeating into his skin, and he looked at my hand.
"What's wrong?" I asked, despite knowing why, every time I held his hand, he would look down at the connection. "You're a little cold," I said and smiled. "Hope Mister ice Man isn't coming up with a cold."
He heard this and sighed.
"You should be the one worrying about catching a cold from being near me too much." He said and I laughed.
"Mister ice man," I drew closer to him, holding his hand more intimately and scratching my finger in his palm. "Are you worrying about me right now?"
I grinned in his face. A plastic mischievous grin, holding secret intent and plans he could never figure out.
"Don't get ahead of yourself." He said and then walked past me, holding my hand tight as he walked towards the living room. "It's only inevitable that you catch a cold from me."
"Wow, are you cursing me now?" I laughed.
"I'm just stating the fact." He stubbornly said but I laughed more.
Well, I don't know about that fact but... I looked at his hand holding mine tightly, as if he didn't want to let go... 'You're the one actually getting ahead of yourself here and you don't even realize it.'
I don't know if he noticed, or if this was just a habit he was forming from having held my hand so much that he got addicted to my warmth, but... I definitely liked this development.
Please, do get ahead of yourself more so you can hold me like I'm the most precious existence you'll ever have in your life.
Well, I am the most precious existence he'll ever have but let's give him time to come to terms with that.