Chapter 146: Kushida, We Cannot Do Anything Wrong!
What he thought would be an ordinary day off was once again disrupted by Sakura's several visits.
Every time he looked at the girl lying in his arms, Hikigaya felt it was surreal, not even knowing when he had begun to accept it. But her sleeping face, snuggled beside him, felt like the school's final comfort, allowing Hikigaya to cast aside all worries.
At some point, Hikigaya began to slowly accept all of this. After all, this was his responsibility, something he absolutely could not evade with any excuse.
If possible, he had to take responsibility.
…
If one got used to this kind of life, they would surely sink into it completely. Even if only for a day or two, it would make one savor it repeatedly. Simple days off passed quickly, and with Sakura's company, they passed even faster.
Compared to the start of school, life now seemed fuller, though Hikigaya couldn't exactly describe what made it so.
But one thing was undeniable: his previously hollow heart had, through gradual interactions with them, become interesting.
At some point, his mind no longer overflowed with random complaints. He simply smiled faintly and accepted everything that happened.
Tomorrow… When he woke up, the first year would see a major change. Not only would Ichinose join his class, but Class AD would also face setbacks in the upcoming exam.
The Hirata issue had not been resolved yet, and the next exam would basically be the end-of-term assessment for the second semester. By then, the class would face even bigger problems.
Hikigaya hoped Ichinose's arrival could gather the now scattered Class C together. He decided to place his hopes on her. She had a special presence that Hikigaya himself could not possess.
It was a power naturally respected by others, coming straight from her heart.
But all this would only be known after waking up.
Thinking about it now was nothing but making it harder to sleep.
With that, Hikigaya planned to lie down and sleep well. He had been overexerting himself these past two days. Honestly, if he didn't take care of his body, something would break eventually.
He had even told Sakura this. She was first surprised at his rationality. Hikigaya was usually rational, but being able to think logically about such matters already surpassed ninety-nine percent of boys.
Later, although she still felt a bit reluctant to go to school, Sakura obediently nodded. She always seriously followed Hikigaya's suggestions.
Hikigaya felt the same way.
However, until the door was knocked again, he didn't realize things wouldn't go smoothly.
"Looks like I won't get to rest tonight."
Hikigaya thought this and went to the door, gently opening it.
He expected Sakura to be standing there as usual, but no one was in sight.
"Sakura?"
After calling her name, there was no reply. Hikigaya felt a sweat break out on his back but gathered courage and slowly peeked his head out.
What he saw next terrified him. The person hiding behind the door was not Sakura but Kushida.
Her face was grim, as if extremely displeased. Seeing Hikigaya's head, she suddenly grabbed him and shoved a pre-prepared tissue into his mouth.
"Hey… mmmph!"
Before he could react, Kushida, as if premeditated, dragged his head inside the room, removed his shoes, and slammed the door shut with a violent kick.
Unable to escape, Hikigaya's hands were pinched painfully by Kushida. She seemed to notice but didn't relent. After ensuring the door was locked, she executed a shoulder throw.
Hikigaya's body flew through the air like seeing a deceased grandmother in heaven.
Next moment…
"Bang!"
A loud crash filled the room. Hikigaya's bones felt like they might break; pain spread throughout his body. He was disoriented, unable to move his hands or feet.
The tissue in his mouth nearly fell out from the shock, but Kushida wasn't done. Swiftly, she sat on Hikigaya, forcing the tissue further into his mouth.
Hikigaya felt his mind go blank. If he wasn't sure it was Kushida, he might have thought an assassin had broken in.
But why would someone hate a guy like him? If anyone, they should be going after Tatsuyama! That guy deserved death!
Clearly, it wasn't Hikigaya's turn to think. Kushida, her face icy, sat on him. Due to her weight, Hikigaya was further immobilized.
He struggled but was met with Kushida's disdain. She grabbed both of his hands with one hand.
Finally, Kushida spoke:"I've been watching you for a few days. Our mixed dormitory… I didn't expect you to be so bold, Hikigaya. I really underestimated you."
With the tissue in his mouth, Hikigaya couldn't say a word.
Kushida's expression was cold; Hikigaya didn't doubt she might kill him next.
"That day, I wondered why you and Sakura were acting so strangely… So this is why. Karuizawa and Horikita… those two idiots… couldn't see it either. But I can't blame them. Karuizawa isn't cunning, and Horikita's attention is always on class matters."
She smiled mischievously: "But I'm different. Call me cunning if you want, I don't blame you."
"But since you've personally removed the mask I rely on to survive, you have to take responsibility, idiot."
"Mm…"
"What's that 'mm' for? You have a mouth, don't you?"
Kushida looked impatient, then thoughtfully removed the tissue.
"Phew… phew…"
Hikigaya gasped heavily. He thought he might suffocate.
"I… I say… you… are you trying to kill me?"
"If I didn't do this, you'd use some excuse to avoid me. I can't tell if you're lying otherwise."
Hikigaya looked helpless. Regardless of right or wrong, he couldn't reveal what happened with Sakura.
The consequences were unimaginable. To him, it was like the world exploding.
"Anyway, get up first."
"I don't want to."
"Don't be like that…"
Hikigaya had no strength to resist, and even if he did, he didn't want to.
"When you're with Sakura, I don't think you'd say that."
"Please…"
"I like you."
Before he could react, Kushida leaned forward, pinning him down, and again covered his mouth with hers.
"Mmm…"
Her eyes were closed, as if simply enjoying the moment. Her face was no longer cold; her gaze softened, and a smile slowly spread.
Hikigaya couldn't accept any of it. Kushida was right, he had removed her mask and should take responsibility.
But doing this disrespected Sakura, and it was not what Hikigaya truly wanted.
He could resist.
'I cannot sink further.'
Thinking this, Hikigaya tried with all his strength to push her off.
But…
He unexpectedly touched something extraordinary, making his body tremble. Kushida stopped the kiss, her whole body softening slightly with the movement.
Yet she didn't get angry; instead, a more mischievous smile appeared.
"Looks like now you can't avoid responsibility… a little kitten trying to run away."
She ignored whether he agreed and wrapped his hands with pre-prepared rope, then pulled sharply with her right hand. Hikigaya never expected Kushida to prepare this far and was left stunned.
"Don't, don't… Kushida…"
"Call me Kikyō."
"..."
"Will you or not?"
"Kikyō… please don't… I… I can't forgive myself."
"I can't forgive myself either… for letting you go."
Hikigaya didn't know how to continue talking. He just sighed.
"Don't worry. After this, I'll explain everything to Sakura. I won't call it an accident, because I'll take responsibility for you."
Hikigaya had never heard a girl say this to him. Honestly, did he dislike Kushida?
The answer was definitely no.
When she revealed her true self for him, Hikigaya viewed her differently. Later, during many exams, he cooperated with her multiple times. She always appeared when needed.
So when Kushida asked that question, Hikigaya didn't answer, choosing silence instead.
It wasn't that he disliked it; he just didn't know how to face both Kushida and Sakura at the same time. For something like this, Hikigaya Hachiman really couldn't forgive himself.
As the night slowly deepened, Hachiman's hands were still tightly bound by a thick rope.
From that moment on, he had no right to choose.
Perhaps it was because he hadn't rested at all in the past few days, or perhaps it was because Kushida was far too intense and domineering compared to Sakura, their time together didn't last an entire night.
In the middle of the night, Kushida finally, after losing the last of her strength, decided to let go of Hachiman.
From the floor to the bed, the scene of their struggle was unspeakably chaotic, leaving sticky traces everywhere.
After the middle of the night, time no longer mattered, because Hachiman's desire to rest properly had been shattered, and he couldn't fall asleep. He just lay on the bed with a detached expression.
Kikyo slid into his blanket. Compared to her usual domineering and icy demeanor, she was very different.
Afterward, Kushida's gaze became even more tender and captivating, like when she first entered school, but now, there was no trace of any pretense.
Hachiman lay under the blanket, feeling "cool," and stared at the ceiling, while Kushida simply stared at the boy's profile.
"I'm asking, you hate me, don't you?"
Hachiman shook his head, saying nothing.
"I know this is my fault, that I forced you to do something you didn't want to do, but… I'm sorry. I have to be selfish. I absolutely cannot let you go just like that."
As she spoke, Kushida's expression carried no pity, no intention of making Hachiman feel sorry for her, as if she were merely stating a thought from her heart.
Hachiman looked at Kushida. Her face was flushed, probably because it was too hot under the blanket. She became unusually shy, then, on her own, hugged Hachiman.
"Kikyo, you shouldn't be doing this, but…"
"But… I can't deny that I was wrong too."
If this time he was filled with reason, then the first time with Sakura had been completely unreasonable. Back then, he had been swept away by the same feelings, so he couldn't blame Kushida.
She was just an ordinary girl fallen in love; she had done nothing wrong.
Listening to Hachiman's words, Kushida frantically poked at his chest like she was venting a small tantrum: "You told me you'd take responsibility. You forced me to do it this way. If I could, who would want to force someone else…"
As if she had touched a tender point, the usually cold and strong Kushida's eyes moistened, and the tears slowly ran down to Hachiman's chest.
This time, Hachiman didn't refuse; he hugged Kushida tightly.
For a girl to be this brave was truly rare, and her beauty was such that any boy would find it hard to resist. Yet she endured such hardship with him.
Since mistakes had already been made, one might as well admit them and see them through. For now, he only hoped that Sakura could forgive him.
At this moment, their bodies felt completely fused, and Kushida, cradled in Hachiman's arms, completely let herself go, crying out loudly.
…
The next morning, Hachiman dragged his exhausted body out of bed again. Because he wasn't wearing clothes and it was winter, he immediately shrank back into the blanket.
He truly hated this feeling of being tired yet forced to get up early; it drained all his energy for the day.
Kushida, however, in his arms, seemed like a completely relaxed cat after the nighttime release, clinging to Hachiman's arm without a trace of her usual coldness.
One had to admit, Kushida's figure was outrageously astonishing. Just by holding Hachiman's arm, he could feel the heavy yet soft weight of her body, a terrifying "evil" power.
At Hachiman's soft call, Kushida finally lazily rubbed her eyes and woke up.
"Your eyes are swollen."
"It's all your fault, tricking me like that."
"I…"
Hachiman felt completely speechless.
Kushida wasn't angry; she just stuck out her cheek and posed in a tsundere manner.
"Here, I'll forgive you if you give me a kiss as a reward."
"No, this…"
Hachiman had just started to protest that it wasn't his fault when he suddenly felt a wave of coldness sweep over him. Strangely, it wasn't because of the weather.
Helpless, Hachiman had no choice but to comply.
Having received the reward he deserved, Kushida happily returned a kiss, and this time, it was on Hachiman's lips.
"Alright, get up now."
"It's so cold, help me get dressed."
"You're acting like a child again?"
"I want you to help me get dressed!"
"No…"
Another chill ran through Hachiman's body. Shivering in fear, he had no choice but to obey.
Not to mention, Kushida's face remained flushed, more alluring than usual. But in this short time, Hachiman noticed that his own body was no longer under his control.
Of course, Kushida noticed it too, but she only gave a mischievous smile and didn't continue with anything else.
It wasn't that she didn't want to; one reason was time, they were already running late, and another was that her actions were meant to assert control over Hachiman. Now that the goal was achieved, she could savor the rest another time.
After enduring this difficult period, Hachiman finally got dressed. This time, there was more time than before, and they agreed not to let anyone discover anything like last time with Sakura.
At first, Kushida disagreed. This was her perfect chance to assert her position. But after thinking it over, she agreed.
Status didn't matter. Now, she and Sakura were the only ones on the same side. As for others, it didn't matter how much they tried to seduce Hachiman.
Of course, if possible, she still needed to assert her status in other ways, after all, she had confessed.
As for Sakura, Hikigaya would take the initiative to apologize, and Kushida would explain herself. She admitted she was wrong.
If possible, Hikigaya wanted to resolve it this morning. He didn't know if Sakura would hate him, slap him, and call him a "scumbag," but hiding this from her was too painful.
No matter which side, he had to take responsibility. After all, they had shared the same bed, it was impossible to escape responsibility with excuses.
[In the chatroom, Yukinoshita was furiously tapping on the projection.]
[Isshiki softly reminded: "Yukinoshita-senpai, lighter… lighter…"]
[Yukinoshita sighed helplessly: "Why does this projection always fail at critical moments? It's infuriating…"]
[Hayama laughed: "No need to rush. It's a day off; nothing serious."]
[But just smiling like that earned Yukinoshita a cold glare. Her expression was merciless, like an emotionless killer.]
[It was a day off, true, but without seeing Hikigaya, Yukinoshita felt uneasy. If someone took advantage of the day to do something excessive, she could kill the man beside her at any time.]
[Hikigaya sat with hands on his knees, trying to suppress the shaking of his legs, yet still trembling.]
[One had to admit, Yukinoshita's presence was overwhelmingly oppressive.]
[In another classroom, a similar scene unfolded.]
[Sakura: "What do you think Hachiman does on weekends? He can't really sleep two days straight, that would turn him into a pig."]
[Kushida: "Who knows? If I stayed in my room for two days like him, I'd go crazy."]
[Sudō: "Maybe he has someone to hang out with?"]
["Hm?"]
[Sudō flustered: "No, I mean, maybe I could hang out with him too, right?"]
[Horikita: "If you go, I can't imagine how you'd have any common interests."]
[Everyone nodded in agreement.]
[Shiina Hiyori: "My weekend with Hachiman is probably similar, just reading and eating."]
[Ibuki: "Didn't you eat for a long time?"]
[Kaneda: "Maybe read all day…"]
[Ryuen: "You wouldn't understand the world of fools. I definitely can't stay in my room for two days."]
[Shiina Hiyori: "I feel like Ryuen is cursing again…"]
[Ichinose: "With so many friends, Hachiman should go hang out."]
[Hikigaya: "You'll be disappointed. I don't have many friends."]
[Ichinose: "Then you can hang out with me because I'm your friend!"]
[Damn it, she fell for it…]
[Kamuro: "Luckily it's the weekend. Otherwise, watching idiots all day would drive me insane."]
[On the other hand, Kito shrugged: "Maybe you'll regret it. There could be something unbelievable behind that door."]
[Kamuro suddenly felt refreshed.]
(End of this chapter)