Morning broke over Darsha Estate, but rather than the familiar serene sound of birdsong, the air rang with a strange combination of clashing metal, hammer blows, and the rolling of barrels over cobblestones like a horde of wooden thunder.
Sharath stood in the center of the courtyard like a general on the eve of a great campaign. The catch? His army wasn't comprised of plated knights — it was a mix of:
Team 1: His high-end massacre crew — battle-tested psychopaths who could withstand Sharath's friendly fire without getting PTSD.
Team 2 & 3: Barrel transport teams, every squad equipped with souped-up tricycles pulling quad-barrel trailers that resembled medieval siege engines.
Team 4: The operators in the warehouse — proud, apprehensive individuals who stood on the brink of experiencing the very worst instance of "we don't have enough storage" in estate history.
Lord Bassana sat on the sidelines taking sips of his tea with the kind of unruffled equanimity only a man equipped with space pocket bags could possess. Lord Darsha stood next to him, arms folded, already scheming exactly how much of this mission could be explained away as "necessary estate maintenance" on next year's tax scroll.
The Pre-Dive Speech
Sharath cleared his throat and spoke to the gathered crews.
"Hear me out! This isn't merely a dungeon crawl — this is an infinite loot op. I don't want to see any drop of slime sludge wasted. No fire slime gone uncollected. No ice boar tusk overlooked. No crystal slime shard overlooked. This… is war."
Team 1 clapped. Team 2 and 3 exchanged worried glances, understanding this meant they'd be carrying barrels until their legs collapsed. Team 4 prayed under their breath to storage deities.
🐧Neuro Boop: "War? Ha. This is you attempting to become the Jeff Bezos of slime goo."Thermo: "Clarification: the militarized Jeff Bezos of slime goo."Sharath: "Laugh all you want, but monopolies are based on systems, and today… we are the system."
The Entry – Round Two
The entrance of the dungeon was just as crowded as a dock in a port city. Team 4 had a stack of empty barrels stacked higher than a mountain that could be seen from the highway. Team 2 and 3 had cleaned their tricycles until they sparkled like parade floats.
With a dramatic finger gesture, Sharath took Team 1 into the dungeon.
The second floor welcomed them with anarchy:
Fire slimes hurled molten blobs around the room.
Ice boars, tusks edged with frost, charged blindly.
Crystal slimes glittered like hazardous disco balls.
Sharath didn't waste any time. M416 in the left hand, Uzi in the right, he cut loose a barrage of bullets that filled the air with ear-shattering BRATATATATATATAT in stereo.
Slimes exploded like tacky water balloons. Boars fell in mid-charge. Crystal slimes burst into glittering puddles that caused the floor to resemble something decorated by a too-enthusiastic party planner.
The Loot Conveyor System
This time, it was different.No more "loot until full and leave the rest."
As soon as a barrel was full, Team 2 and 3 swooped in like vultures at the trough, carting away the valuable goo. They left behind empty barrels as fast as they took away the full ones, like some industrial production line.
One of the transporters rolled by with barrels piled so high he couldn't even see the ground. Sharath gestured carelessly amidst gunfire.
"Watch it! That's top-grade slime!"
🐧Neuro Boop: "Sounds like a wine snob, only dark lord-quality slime is used here."Thermo: "Vintage 201, picked fresh from the guts of a freshly killed monster."
Monster Respawn Madness
The dungeon surely got the message that Sharath wasn't going anywhere after hour 10.The respawn rate doubled, then tripled.
Batches of fifty slimes spawned at once. Herds of boars spawned. Crystal slimes attempted to fuse together, only to be cut down before they could fully combine.
Sharath's eyes sparkled. "They want to rush things? Fine."
The battlefield was a conveyor belt of death. Slimes were killed before their spawn animation was completed. Ice boars were frozen in mid-charge. Crystal slimes exploded like overpriced chandeliers.
Monster death screams and the sound of bullets were so relentless that the transport teams started moving barrels in sync with it like a ghastly work song.
The Boss Room – Not Today
Hour 18 led them to the boss chamber.A massive Inferno Slime Boar Hybrid was in mid-dramatic entrance — fire licking one tusk, ice dripping from the other, glowing eyes foretelling doom.
Sharath yawned, drew out a grenade launcher, and — THUMP.BOOM.
The hybrid roared, mid-roar, before it died. A heap of loot landed on the floor with a loud, unceremonious plop.
Team 1 applauded. Not because it was amazing, but because they finally received a three-minute break while Sharath pillaged.
The Warehouse Problem
Outside the dungeon, meanwhile….
When Team 4 received the 247th barrel of slime sludge and the 180th frozen corpse of an ice boar, the warehouse manager of Darsha Estate suffered a nervous breakdown.
"Lord Darsha, the ice boar room is… uh… full."Darsha blinked. "Already?""Yes, my lord. We… we began piling them in the wine cellar."
Bassana, sipping tea without raising his eyes, merely replied, "Problem?"
The warehouse manager gulped. "Well… the wine now has a hint of pork flavor."
Sharath's Victory Lap
With 22 hours of non-stop farming, the second floor was bare.
Not in the "relaxing nature taking its rightful space" sense — in the "we cleared everything that could be harvested" sense.
The loot list was absurd:
Slime sludge barrels: 300+
Slime acid bottles: 120
Crystal shards: 400
Ice boar carcasses: 220 (mint condition)
Other oddities: 17 hats, 1 pair of boots, a defective chair, and one suspiciously clean doormat.
Sharath's only regret: that the warehouse area hadn't been infinite.
Dinner Debrief – Round Two
Over dinner that evening, Sharath was almost shaking with enthusiasm as he described the day.
And with the groups well-established, not a drop of loot went to waste! Not even the chair!" We grabbed everything!"
Lady Ishvari glared at him over her wine glass. "I suppose I should be thankful you didn't bring back the walls of the dungeon."
Sharath stuttered for a moment. ".yet."
🐧Neuro Boop: "No. No, we're not doing this."Thermo: "We are absolutely doing this.
Lord Darsha rubbed his temples. "Son, I just want to remind you — there are people who use the dungeon to train. You've made it a slaughterhouse with a barrel export business."
Bassana laughed. "And a lucrative one."