Merlin kept no secrets from Nora. It was physically impossible for him to do so. He always told her everything he had on his mind, every time, which now included his reason for not wanting to train at a regular boxing gym, but instead with someone close by. And that was because of the structure of rules he believed he would have to follow, the time, and, most importantly, the future.
Basically, he wanted to be able to coordinate himself and decide when and where he could practice, and, if possible, continue even later on—if he got into Prestige Academy.
That was also true for his System. Nora knew about every single thing going on with it, its Quests, and, of course, his constant failures with meditation. That was why she had been able to help get him the meditation classes he'd needed from Sunny.
It was not like Merlin hadn't had any plans on that front, but his had just been the direct approach of asking, and, most likely, paying if Sunny had requested for a fee. Nora's method had been more effective, though—and frugal, too—and he had no problems with that.
Now, he was seated opposite Sunny, cross-legged, and trying to fall into a deep state of trance.
"No," Sunny voiced, frustration bubbling in his tone. "Not a trance. You're trying to meditate."
Merlin was not exactly sure what the difference was. Meditating put one in a half-conscious state, didn't it? If all his years of school hadn't deceived him, then wasn't that what a trance did as well?
"Why is this so hard for you to get?" Sunny sighed, rubbing his hand over his forehead.
They had been at it for almost an hour. Janeth was long gone now, with the claim that she had somewhere important to be—Merlin had hoped that it was not a date with someone else—while Nora had succumbed to sitting on the floor at a corner of the studio-shrine, headsets on, and phone horizontal.
Honestly, Merlin was getting exhausted about this whole thing. It was infuriating. He could be using this time to do something else that could favor him, like working on leveling up his other Attributes.
Merlin wondered what Attributes meditating pertained to, but since the whole Quest schtick had not been in Singularity Mage, it was hard for him to figure that out. However, he'd guessed that it was probably related to Perception, since they were both…mind induced? If he was to add one more Attribute, that would be Intelligence. But, unlike Perception, which was related with sensation as a whole, Intelligence didn't share any particular similarities with meditation.
He could be wrong, though. But, he would have to get something out of this for him to find that out. Which was one of the reasons why he was yet to give up.
"I'm not really understanding you," said Merlin. "I'm doing everything right, aren't I? If I'm falling into a trance, then doesn't that mean the method is wrong, not me?"
Sunny looked so frustrated that it almost seemed like he would rip off the headband tied around his forehead. Merlin had a feeling that it was not because he kept falling into a trance, but because of the money the man had missed out on snatching from them. It was really eating into him, wasn't it? And Merlin not being a fast learner wasn't exactly helping.
"Alright. Let me explain this slowly for you." Sunny became animated, moving his hands around with every word uttered. "Trance and meditation do seem similar at first glance, I understand, I really do. But they aren't the same, okay? Don't make that mistake. Yes, they both involve altered states of consciousness; trance, though, is characterized by deep relaxation and focused attention, allowing one to access deeper levels of their consciousness. So basically, it is what someone falls into when they're hypnotized. Get it?"
Well, that made things easier on that front. This was what a detailed explanation could do. Merlin nodded.
Sunny sighed and continued, still animated, "Meditation, on the other hand, is aimed at achieving mental clarity and a deeper connection with oneself and the world around us. In essence, trance allows for exploration of the subconscious mind—your inner being. While meditation promotes mental clarity and pushes you to become one with nature." He pulled his palms apart. "Depth and solace."
I see…
"So, basically, trance is internal, while meditation is external?" said Merlin with a slight bob of his head.
Sunny was taken aback, perhaps because of the way all his explanations had been dumbed down to just those two things.
"Uhm…I guess? If you put it like that. Anyways, the point is, trance and meditation are two different concepts. You don't go about them the same way."
"That much I understand now," replied Merlin. "I'll give it a crack one more time."
"Alright." Sunny sighed. "Geez… All this hard work for so little pay? This is basically exploitation. And she says I was the one planning to exploit. That little devil." He shot a glare at Nora.
Merlin, however, was yet to begin his meditation. After all, something had stormed his mind in that moment—something he couldn't just push aside.
If being in a trance-like state deals with my subconscious and being in attunement with a deeper level of my internal self, won't that mean falling into that state will help me attune with my mana more? Maybe I can progress my Intelligence with that, since it's connected to mana? His heart rate increased at that moment, but it calmed down a second later. Eh… I'm probably reaching. There's no surety that meditating won't help with my Intelligence, so why's my mind wandering towards something else? I should just stick to what the System gave me. Well, maybe I can take some time later off tonight to try it out. Wouldn't hurt.
With his thoughts now settled—all through it, Sunny had still been shooting Nora a glare she didn't even notice—Merlin rested his palms on his thighs and closed his eyes, recalling all Sunny had told him at the start.
Meditation proved to be a lot easier when one saw it as a 'stop' sign, giving them the permission to pause, breathe, and reset in a busy world.
Sure, Merlin had been doing just that all this while, but after Sunny's expatiation on the concept of meditation and its difference from trance, he'd come to have an inkling of where he had been messing up. Instead of being consciously aware of his senses, feeling for the sensation of the outside world, he had been focusing on his inner self and his fear of falling asleep, which, of course, made him fall asleep.
Now that he knew what to do, he went a different route.
Merlin started by noticing what the mat he was seated upon felt like. It was firm, but slightly cushioned, soft and warm. Then the slightly sweet smell of the incense lingering in the air stormed his nose—for some reason, it was thicker this time—mixed with the woody smell of wax. The taste of his saliva came to his notice—metallic. He heard breaths, the slightly heavy one of Sunny, the very heavy one of Nora, and…his, which was calm.
Merlin breathed in and breathed out. He could feel it. It was working this time. But this was the most important part. He couldn't get distracted. For the next twenty minutes, he was to focus on his circular breath, and the simple words of breathe in and breathe out in his head. Nothing more. If it was done correctly, he wouldn't even notice the passage of time.
And then came the challenge. Merlin's mind began to wander. Thoughts of his parents, their cat, Po, recollections of the day of his evaluation and how he had received the System, what would be of him if he failed the Academy's assessment exam, and…what Janeth was currently up to, rushed one after the other into his mind, causing ripples in its calmness.
However, that was not a basis to dismiss his attempt as a failure. As long as he didn't fall asleep, he could still carry on. Nothing was gotten on the first try; everything required practice, most especially clearing the mind.
Breathe in. Breathe out.
Merlin brought his mind back to those words whenever it wandered. Again and again. Until…the world inside him slowly muffled out, and his ears opened up.
"Piss off…"
He heard Nora curse under her breath. It was low, but he could hear it. That game would be the end of her.
"I'm really losing money here. Tsk."
Sunny's murmur was louder compared to Nora's, but that was because he was closer. His love for money was on a whole different level.
Merlin then heard the soft chirps of birds close to the window, the horns of cars, and footfalls of people walking on the streets; but those were very, very distant.
He still had a long way to go, obviously, but he was getting closer. And when he finally opened his eyes twenty minutes later, due to Sunny's tap, he found words hovering before his eyes, confirming that he had finally achieved some sort of progress.
[Blue Quests ongoing (2):
Strengthen your body, Merlin Tyrrell. (The strength of a Mage not only lies in their prowess with magic, but also in their physicality. A better body makes a better Mage.)
Be clear of mind and spirit, Merlin Tyrrell. (If you are quiet enough, you will hear the flow of the universe. You will feel its rhythm. Go with this flow. Meditation is key. A better mind and soul makes a better Mage.)]
[Progress to leveling up Strength: 8.25%/100%]
[Progress to leveling up Agility: 6%/100%]
[Progress to leveling up Intelligence: 5%/100%]
[Progress to leveling up Perception: 0.5%/100%]
[Progress to leveling up Resilience: 9%/100%]
[Free Attribute Points received: 5]