IT WAS QUIET in the room, rendering the sound of their breaths and the pounding of their hearts louder in their ears. The air was redolent with some scent—musky but sweet.
Mo Ran shifted on the bed, drawing Chu Wanning into his arms from behind and planting gentle kisses on his eyelids and the nape of his neck. Both were covered in sweat, their bodies feverish as they lay pressed together, damp skin sticking to damp skin, limbs entwined in a clinging embrace. Chu Wanning felt faint; he didn't dare dwell on what they'd just done. The very thought was absurd.
But his heart was warm and glowing. Gentle waters surged beneath his ribcage, about to spill over.
Mo Ran heard the man in his arms murmur, "What about you?" "Huh?" Mo Ran went still, taken aback.
Chu Wanning cleared his throat. "You…" He began. He turned in
the darkness, lifting those bright eyes to meet Mo Ran's.
Even in the gloom, Mo Ran imagined he could see the flush on Chu Wanning's cheeks.
"You're still…" Chu Wanning hesitated for a long beat, incapable of voicing his thoughts. In the end, he lowered his lashes. "I'll help you."
Realization broke over Mo Ran, and his heart ached. Embracing Chu Wanning, he said, "Why are you so silly? It doesn't matter. That can wait."
"I'm not silly," Chu Wanning said stiffly. He rejected the word. "Aren't you the one being silly? Aren't you…uncomfortable like this?"
Mo Ran coughed awkwardly. "Once you're asleep, I'll go take a bath and…"
But Chu Wanning would not be dissuaded. "I'll help you." "It's all right." Mo Ran hastily stopped him.
Chu Wanning fell silent. His clumsiness in bed was shameful; how could he give Mo Ran any pleasure? Mo Ran's excuse of taking a bath later was probably merely thrown out to placate him—what Mo Ran really meant was that using his own hand would be better than relying on Chu Wanning's skills, or lack thereof. At this thought, his eyes slowly dulled. "Forget it then, if you don't want it."
Mo Ran paused. In the afterglow of his own pleasure, Chu Wanning's voice wasn't controlled, as it usually was. His usual cool detachment had fled, leaving his dissatisfaction and indignance sharp and vivid. How silly could this man be? How could Mo Ran not want it? He wanted it more than anything; he wanted this night to be eternal, for the torrential downpour outside to fall forever. He wanted to drown in pleasure with Chu Wanning in this inn for the rest of time, to devour the man in his arms until their flesh and souls were one. He wanted to see Chu Wanning tormented to the point of sobbing; he wanted to leave his unmistakable mark inside this man's body.
But it would hurt him.
He remembered the high fever Chu Wanning had run after the first time Mo Ran had taken him the past life. Even now, Mo Ran couldn't forget his face in the aftermath, skin pale and lips cracked. He wanted to take it slowly. It didn't matter how much effort he had to put in to resist his desires; he wanted Chu Wanning's first time to be good. And he wanted him to feel pleasure and enjoyment in every subsequent dalliance; he wanted him to savor the sensation and sink into its depths with him.
But Chu Wanning had clearly misunderstood.
Mo Ran kissed his brow. "How could I not want it?" he said huskily. "What are you thinking?"
Chu Wanning said nothing.
"Can't you see the state I'm in?" Mo Ran's fiery, labored breaths fanned his ear. "I'm this hard, and you somehow think I don't want you… Dummy."
Chu Wanning's temper flared. "Call me dumb again and I'll cut your head off! You—mngh…"
Mo Ran had caught his hand and tugged it downward. The instant it met Mo Ran's body, Chu Wanning was too startled to manage a harsh word. Steam seemed to rise from his ears.
"Look what you've done to me."
Wrapped in soft darkness, Mo Ran kissed Chu Wanning's eyelids again, then ducked to capture his mouth. He suckled and licked at Chu Wanning's lips, intoxicated by infatuation.
After several more kisses like these, neither of them could take any more. The desire in the room thickened; as their mouths entwined, so did their legs. They ground against each other, the blaze of lust almost enough to light up the dark. In the haze, Mo Ran heard Chu Wanning mumble, dissatisfied and embarrassed, with all his habitual stubbornness: "I also… want to make you feel good…"
The last syllables came out shaking, as though shame threatened to engulf them. Mo Ran's heart was close to melting, and his neglected cock was an angry red. Chu Wanning's hand was still pressed against him, the ready heat emanating from his palm to the small of his back.
Chu Wanning could feel just how formidable that weapon described in the cultivation rankings was in its state of arousal; it was so thick, so hard, and so heated, even through the fabric it strained against. That ferocious thing would never fit in his mouth…
Making love with a man like this would be life-threatening.
Chu Wanning finally realized Mo Ran's insistence that it would hurt wasn't a baseless worry. Hurt was the least of it—he'd be torn to pieces, rent asunder, his whole body split apart. But thinking how Mo Ran had taken care of him, Chu Wanning mustered up courage from who knew where—or perhaps he'd always been able to steel himself so ruthlessly— and bent down to try.
Mo Ran panicked. It was hard enough for him to maintain control as it was. If Chu Wanning really took him into his mouth, he feared the last of his gentleness would be reduced to ash by the flames of lust. A man entirely at the mercy of his desire was a beast devoid of reason. He knew himself—he'd crave the heights of pleasure; he'd madly take and take. He stopped Chu Wanning, voice ragged, "Don't, Wanning. You… You…"
"It's fine, I'm only doing the same as you."
"You can't." Mo Ran's voice was like water on the verge of boiling.
He swallowed. "I won't be able to stop myself."
Chu Wanning didn't understand. "Stop yourself from what?" he asked, confused.
Mo Ran cursed under his breath. He couldn't take it anymore. Chu Wanning's scent, his voice, his body were slowly prizing apart his self-imposed chains, burning him to the ground.
After catching his breath, Mo Ran abruptly stood. He turned Chu Wanning over and pinned him face down in the bedding. Before Chu Wanning could react, he felt himself shoved into the sheets with force. Mo Ran's fervid body pressed down on him, engulfing his own.
In that instant, he felt something of terrifying proportions thrust up against his ass through the layer of thin fabric. Chu Wanning cried out, a whimper softer and more lewd than he'd anticipated. His face flushed, hands wringing at the bedding as he bit his lip, refusing to make another sound.
What was it that Mo Ran couldn't stop himself from doing? Chu Wanning was beginning to understand. Mo Ran ground against him through his underclothes, the rest of his words a growl. "Stop myself from wanting to put it in, from wanting to fuck you—how have you not realized…"
Those scalding breaths fell upon the shell of Chu Wanning's ear. Mo Ran braced one strong arm on the bed and wrapped his other around Chu Wanning's hips, thrusting forward and panting roughly. After a moment of ineffectual grinding, Mo Ran patted Chu Wanning's rump and said, "Press your legs together."
Mind a haze, Chu Wanning did as he was told, but he didn't feel Mo Ran move. As he made to turn around, he felt something hot, hard, and thick thrust between his thighs. The sensation ripped a gasp from him, eyes losing focus as his scalp prickled.
Mo Ran pulled his underclothes away to reveal his fully erect cock, flushed dark from arousal and leaking clear fluid at its tip. It pressed between Chu Wanning's thighs, surrounded by the slick, soft heat of the flesh there. Mo Ran groaned in pleasure. Gripping Chu Wanning's waist, he drove his hips forward, fucking into Chu Wanning's thighs.
"Ah…"
Chu Wanning had never even imagined such a thing was possible.
That thickness rubbed obscenely against him, pulsing as it ground between his legs. Chu Wanning was going limp, his straight spine melting as his eyes went glassy. He was delirious; he couldn't sense a thing beyond the sharp thrill of the man he loved thrusting against him. He gasped for breath in silent pants, turning his face and burying it in the bedding, his hair falling loose…
Mo Ran's cock rubbed several times against his entrance. If he lined it up and pressed in, he could wholly take his shizun, he could have this unyielding man beneath him. Inflamed by the threat of being overpowered, being run through, Chu Wanning's spent cock hardened once more alongside Mo Ran's quickening pace. Mo Ran's hips snapped against his, his movements fierce and fervent, unbridled and insatiable. The slap of flesh on flesh echoed in the room; with each thrust, coarse hair rubbed against the tender skin of Chu Wanning's thighs, the abrasion driving him further and further into rapture.
"Shizun, tighten up… Ah…"
The pleading voice of the man behind him was so low, so thick with desire—what could he do but obey?
"Yes…just like that… Even tighter… Fuck…"
Mo Ran's reason was drowned beneath the rising tide of lust. In the heat of the moment, carnal instinct gradually swallowed him; he arched his neck, swallowing with difficulty.
"Shizun…baby…you're so hot inside… Ah… Mn…"
He was referring to the space between his legs, but those words still sounded unbearably vulgar. Those low, absorbed mumblings, that crass and crude language—yet somehow, none of it seemed dirty. Chu Wanning thought perhaps he'd lost his mind. As he listened to Mo Ran's panting, he felt feverish, his thoughts spinning out of his control. "Is it good?" he asked softly.
"Yeah…" When Mo Ran opened his eyes, they were bright and wild. He bent, broad shoulders enfolding Chu Wanning as he held him steady. He pressed him into the bed, their bodies inseparable, his hips still thrusting, frantic heat washing over them both.
He sought Chu Wanning's mouth, seizing him by the jaw to kiss him with a desperate hunger. Their tongues entwined, sliding wetly. Mo Ran's cock pushed between Chu Wanning's legs, thrusting with such force that it sent the bed swaying. It strove to press deeper, Mo Ran's toes going white with the exertion in the bedsheets.
Under this brutal onslaught, Chu Wanning felt as if he really were being taken. Cloaked in the night's darkness, he let himself fall prey to his basest urges without shame, tilting his head to return Mo Ran's passionate kisses, saturated with adoration.
In this position—on all fours, with his head wrenched back—he looked debauched beyond measure, a wanton and tempting sight. Between the pounding of his heart and the fervor of the kiss, he couldn't catch his breath. Dizzy, Chu Wanning glimpsed another fragmented scene—
Where it was, he didn't know. But he was also on a bed, a very wide one, spread with bloodred sheets. Their legs were tangled, their breaths coming fast. Sweat steamed from their skin, heady with desire.
They were in the same position: Mo Ran was fucking him from behind, grabbing his jaw to kiss him. But in this scene, his body had been stretched open, that massive cock pushing fiercely into him. Chu Wanning didn't know how long Mo Ran had been fucking him like this—there seemed to be some salve, so it didn't hurt as much. All was hot and wet as Mo Ran drove hard against a bundle of nerves deep inside him.
"Ah… Ah…"
Someone was moaning, panting, whining, their voice weakened to a whisper. Who was it? Was it him?
Mo Ran pounded into him with no sign of stopping; instead, he slowly increased his pace. Chu Wanning's body was filled to bursting and flooded with pleasure; he felt he was being speared through, yet somehow it felt so good. He was addicted to this feeling, like he'd been trained for it, legs going limp as Mo Ran fucked into him while still instinctively pushing back, grinding against Mo Ran and taking him deeper yet.
The discomfort he felt was indescribable—it was as though there was an insatiable flower pistil inside him that only sex could gratify; it was like the strongest aphrodisiac in the world, capable of destroying the mightiest men. He was falling into pleasure, reciprocating it; gripped by ecstasy, a low whine escaped his throat.
Who was it… What a strange scene… Such a bizarre dream… illusion…reality…
What was this, really?
"Chu Wanning, does it feel good when I fuck you?"
"You look like such a slut when you're taking me like this." "Relax, you're squeezing me too tight…"
"I'll come inside you, come for you… Ah…"
Everything was disjointed, unintelligible, surreal; yet it seemed to have happened just this way. What was going on…
That man's voice sounded like Mo Ran's, but not the Mo Ran he knew. Mo Ran had never spoken in such a twisted way, never… Chu Wanning couldn't hear clearly… It probably wasn't real…
His head was swimming, his thoughts a mess.
As the night wore on, the snapping of Mo Ran's hips grew rougher, more fevered. He braced his feet against the bed, heaving for breath, the pillows and blankets a disheveled snarl. Finally, Mo Ran pulled Chu Wanning into a bruising embrace. They were like rutting beasts, the one on top craving an ardent kiss, the one beneath yearning to entwine with sloppy urgency.
"Wanning… Shizun…" Mo Ran's voice was hoarse and low, mad with love and desire. "Baby…"
Hands kneading Chu Wanning's waist, Mo Ran's full buttocks tensed ferociously as he bucked forward. He was close to climax, his gaze almost vicious. After burying himself between Chu Wanning's thighs with such intensity it seemed like he might shatter him completely, he grabbed the man in his arms, biting and sucking at his earlobe, his nape.
Mo Ran pressed his heaving chest to Chu Wanning's sweat-soaked back, his lucidity hanging by a thread. With a low grunt, nearly undone by the pleasure, he reached down to guide his thick cock, throbbing with need, to Chu Wanning's entrance.
Now having experienced the full ferocity of Mo Ran's arousal, Chu Wanning finally began to panic. Spine tingling, he cried in protest, "Didn't you say you wouldn't put it in? Hold—hold on—"
Breaths heavy, Mo Ran kissed his neck. He swallowed, then turned to whisper against his cheek. "Don't worry, I won't. But…" This was all the control Mo Ran had left. "I want to come, right…here." He pressed the smooth head of his cock against Chu Wanning's clenching hole.
Mo Ran swore under his breath, then pushed himself between Chu Wanning's legs with renewed violence, that sense-shattering pleasure building to its peak. Stroking himself, he pressed his cock flush against Chu Wanning's hole and released everything with a growl. Spurt after spurt covered that tight furl, dripping down Chu Wanning's thighs and smearing onto the sheets. The sight was unspeakably obscene as the musky smell of sex filled the room.
Chu Wanning shook minutely, shivering under Mo Ran's climax.
Reaching down, Mo Ran wrapped his fingers around Chu Wanning's stiff cock. He stroked him off, his touch tender but insistent.
Shame overwhelmed Chu Wanning. "No more…" he mumbled, face flaming. "Stop touching me… I've already…"
Eyes sparkling, Mo Ran whispered in a voice soft with infatuation, "Mn, I know you already came."
Chu Wanning was more stubborn than anyone. He snapped, teary- eyed, "Don't… Don't say that word."
"What word?"
Chu Wanning pressed his lips together.
"Oh." Mo Ran gave him a broad smile. "Okay." He kissed him, his hand never stopping for a moment. "Shizun, I want to see you climax again."
"Mngh…"
Chu Wanning was at the mercy of this young man's skills, swiftly brought to a second orgasm. This kind of drawn-out pleasure was more than he could endure, to say nothing of how his mind had felt fogged this whole time, fragmented scenes swimming across his vision as voices echoed in his ears. He felt so drained, so sleepy…
"Wanning."
He heard Mo Ran calling out to him from behind, so gentle, tender, adoring.
Their most primal urges sated, the two gradually caught their breath. Mo Ran caressed him, kissed him, thanked him, drawing him into his arms as if protecting a great treasure.
Chu Wanning, delirious and naked, stared blankly into the night, resting his cheek on Mo Ran's broad chest. At last, he slowly closed his eyes and fell into sleep.
When Chu Wanning awoke the next morning, the early light had snuck into the room through a crack in the window. He could hear rain drumming down on the roof tiles; the downpour hadn't let up.
His head ached dully. Scattered images from the night before flashed through his mind like the glint of fish scales in a dike, glimmering as they rose and fell in the water. He cast his mind after them, but those scales sank deeper and deeper, swallowed by the darkness.
Suddenly he stiffened, cheeks blazing. He recalled what he and Mo Ran had done last night. His first thought was to get up, but Mo Ran was still holding him, sturdy arms wrapped around him, and chest pressed to Chu Wanning's spine as it rose and fell evenly. He was still asleep.
So Chu Wanning waited, just like that, for who knew how long.
Time felt unclear in that darkened room. It must have been a long time— long enough that his arms seemed to go numb, and his pounding heart gradually slowed. Long enough that it no longer felt so embarrassing.
He finally turned to gaze at Mo Ran's sleeping face.
Mo Ran was undeniably handsome. Such arresting looks were rare in this world: his brows, nose, and lips were all as beautiful as they could be. But just now, his brows were knit tight, as if something weighed heavy on his mind. Chu Wanning watched him silently for a long time. At last he couldn't resist. Very gently, he kissed Mo Ran on the cheek—the first time he'd taken the initiative to do so.
He nudged Mo Ran's arms aside and swung his legs over the edge of the bed, pulling on his underclothes, then reaching for his pristine white robes. They were covered in suggestive wrinkles—Chu Wanning tried to smooth them out to no avail. He had no choice but to put them back on and pray no one from Sisheng Peak would notice. He fixed his lapels, lost in thought.
Warm arms came around him from behind. Chu Wanning jolted, though it only translated to a brief pause in his movements.
Mo Ran had woken some time ago. He sat up to hug Chu Wanning and kissed his earlobe. "Shizun…"
He didn't know what to say. This was their first true morning-after in this life—even Mo Ran was struggling with the awkwardness of a newlywed, to say nothing of Chu Wanning. He let the silence stretch for a long moment before he softly said, "G'morning…"
"Morning? It's late." Chu Wanning put on his clothes without turning.
Mo Ran smiled. He reached out, helping Chu Wanning straighten the pendant around his neck. "This is for expelling cold; it has to be worn against the skin or it's no use." His voice was slightly hoarse.
Struck by a late recollection, Chu Wanning whirled to face him.
Last night as they'd made love, he'd felt something fastened around Mo Ran's neck, but he'd been too dizzy to get a good look. Now, he saw it was a dragonblood crystal pendant, the exact twin of his own.
"Didn't…" Chu Wanning's jaw dropped. "Didn't you say at Rufeng Sect that this was the last one? Then how—"
He fell silent as Mo Ran smiled back at him, dimples tucked softly into his cheeks, his eyes gentle. In a flash, he understood Mo Ran's little act of selfishness back then. Chu Wanning turned without another word, flustered, and bowed his head as he fiddled with his clothes. "We should go back soon." He didn't look at Mo Ran. "Any later and someone will notice."
Docile, Mo Ran replied, "Of course—whatever you say, Shizun."
But in the next moment, a devious heat flared in his chest once more. Grabbing Chu Wanning, who'd already pulled on his boots and was ready to stand, he nuzzled close and pressed a sweet kiss to his lips.
"Don't be mad. I'll have to hold back once we return; I just want something to remember this by." Mo Ran grinned, forestalling whatever Chu Wanning was about to say with a finger to his lips. "Shizun, you're the best."
That sentence left Chu Wanning wandering in distraction until they passed back through the mountain gates. He didn't think those words applied to him. It was Mo Ran who was the best. This young man was handsome, gentle, and loved him with an all-consuming focus. Sometimes, even Chu Wanning felt it couldn't be real. Mo Ran was too perfect—how could he belong to someone as boring as himself? A man who couldn't even muster a single soft endearment.
But when Mo Ran looked at him, his expression was earnest, without the slightest hint of falsehood. When Mo Ran kissed him, he was so passionate, as if he'd handed control of his every breath to Chu Wanning, along with everything else. Last night, though Chu Wanning's actions had been clumsy and his words dry, and his mind had sometimes wandered… Mo Ran hadn't been put off by any of it. When he woke in the morning, he still wanted to kiss Chu Wanning's lips and say, You're the best.
"Shizun."
"Mn?"
Returning to his senses, Chu Wanning saw Mo Ran waving at him from beneath a red haitang-patterned barrier. "Where are you going? Let's go this way—the Red Lotus Pavilion's over there, but let's eat at Mengpo Hall before you go back."
In the dining hall, Mo Ran sat across from him as usual. But with a constant stream of passersby chatting around them, they became self- conscious. They kept their heads down and applied themselves to their meal in silence.
Those disciples who liked betting on Chu Wanning whispered among themselves. "Why isn't the Yuheng Elder talking to Mo-shixiong today?"
"Never mind talking, he's not even looking at him."
"That's weird. Mo-shixiong isn't putting food in the Yuheng Elder's bowl either. Isn't he normally really clingy…? What happened, did they fight?"
"Would you still sit at the same table as your shizun after a fight?" "Ha ha, fair enough."
They saw Chu Wanning stand up to fetch another helping of congee. When that white-clad figure swept past them, those busybodies fell silent, keeping their heads down and their mouths busy with their steamed buns. Only once Chu Wanning sat back down did they start chittering like rats once again.
"Have you noticed? There's something off about the Yuheng Elder today."
Someone nodded. "There is! I just can't tell what—his clothes maybe?"
Six pairs of eyes snuck curious glances at Chu Wanning. Finally, one of the disciples clicked his tongue. "They're all wrinkled—they aren't as perfect as usual."
The observers all realized this was indeed the case, but no one's thoughts drifted in any untoward direction. After some back and forth, they concluded that the Yuheng Elder must have dealt with some demons in the forbidden area of the backwoods last night, or patched up a small Heavenly Rift.
These disciples admired and revered him. At most, they might find him a source of occasional entertainment. But no one had ever treated him as a man of flesh and blood, a man with his own desires. Although Mo Ran and Chu Wanning hadn't been as painstakingly careful as they might have been, although they had left behind many obvious clues, none of those disciples noticed or paid attention.
When a man was placed on a holy altar and elevated by the masses, he must be silent and unmoving, cold and aloof. The slightest blunder and everything he did would be considered wrong. That was why, much later, when Mo Weiyu and Chu Wanning's relationship was made known to the world, many felt their deity had crumbled. They were furious and disgusted, finding it unbelievable—unacceptable.
No one remembered that to raise someone to the heights of worship—demanding he take every step along the path the masses dictated, demanding he live only according to the whims of the people, refusing to let him show the slightest hint of selfish desire—was, at its core, an act of cruelest coercion.