Maestro vanished into the amusement park's darkness. I trusted he was off to fulfill his end of the bargain.
He didn't seem like the type to take a fragment of my Mystery and then shamelessly run off without keeping his promise. Generally, the members of Gematria, with the exception of Beatrice, were a rather dignified bunch.
I never imagined someone of Maestro's stature would go to such lengths for Hifumi's sake. Things had certainly taken a strange turn.
As I walked back, I tried to imagine what kind of bizarre creation Maestro would produce with my Mystery. For some reason, I could already hear Sensei's pained screams. It probably wouldn't be far from the truth.
Still, even considering that, I think I've already done more to lighten Sensei's load than to add to it. The appearances of Total Assault bosses like Hieronymus and Gregorius have already been half-derailed, haven't they? And I completely blocked the future where Saori shoots Sensei and turns him into a donut. Surely he can handle a slight increase in Total Assault difficulty, right? It's not like he's the type to be defeated by a little hardship.
If he insists, I'd even be willing to take a flick on the forehead. Knowing his personality, that's as far as he'd go.
Crossing the boundary from the eerily deserted area back into the bustling crowds, the strangeness of the deal I'd just made truly began to sink in.
Even so, thinking of it as a small gift for Hifumi, who had been such a wonderful friend to me all this time, made it feel like a worthwhile exchange. Or maybe it's better to call it a small offering to the great Lord Faust.
"Ah… Look, it's Mika!"
"Mika…? Where did you run off to in such a hurry?"
"Ahaha, you could say I had some business with an acquaintance. It was nothing to worry about, so you can relax, Nagi."
It seemed that in the ten minutes I was gone, the group hadn't moved from our spot near the parade route, waiting for me to return.
"Besides, Hifumi, I don't think you need to be too upset about the parade."
"Huh…? It's a shame I won't get to see Lord Peroro leading the magnificent parade, but it's okay! I had a lot of fun today, and I even made new friends. That's more than enough for me!"
"Oh, you recovered faster than I thought, Hifumi?! Now the gift I prepared won't feel as special…"
Hifumi's bright smile was much more cheerful than I'd anticipated. I was expecting a bit more of a mental breakdown, but it seems I'd underestimated her.
As expected of Ajitani Hifumi, the future betrayer of humanity. She's strong…
"A gift, you say…? Aww… Mika, you really don't have to give me any more gifts. It's getting to be a bit much for me."
"Hmm, can't do that."
"Huh? Why…?"
"Because I plan to shower you with gifts until the day you learn to be shameless enough to accept them without flinching!"
"Aww… Please don't do this to me, Mika… Oh, I know! Instead of me, you should give them to Azusa!"
Hifumi pointed at Azusa, a brilliant idea having seemingly struck her. Her intentions were so transparently cute.
"Ahaha! You don't have to ask, Hifumi. I already make sure our little squirrel sees only the best, eats only the best, and wears only the best. So you can accept my gifts without any burden!"
"It's all true. From head to toe, there isn't a single part of me that Mika's touch hasn't reached."
Azusa, hearing my words, suddenly made that declaration. She then trotted over to my side and looked up at me expectantly.
…Hey, Azusa, don't you think that statement could be a little misleading? What are you expecting after dropping a bomb like that?
"..."
"Kyahat! My, my, Ms. Angel is quite the sly one, isn't she~? At this rate, maybe I should be wary of you too!"
Nagisa's silent stare was piercing. I wanted to smack Mutsuki for her theatrics.
Lady Nagisa, I know how that sounded, but it's a complete misunderstanding, I swear. And more importantly…
"Hey, Azusa… didn't Hifumi pick out the clothes you're wearing today?"
The clothes you have on now have never even been touched by my hands. In other words, this is slander. I'm innocent.
"Oh, that's right! I picked those out for her when we went shopping the other day!"
"...I don't know anything about that."
"A-Azusa?!"
Azusa whipped her head away from Hifumi. Seeing her like this, who would ever believe she'd one day earn a moniker like the 'Ice Witch' in the original story?
"Ahem, anyway. That's not what's important. Hifumi, you don't have to be disappointed about the parade being canceled. Because the parade is—"
[Attention, guests. We have an emergency announcement. The parade floats are currently moving on their own and entering the parade route. For your safety, please move away from the area immediately!]
"—going to proceed as scheduled."
Having entered the parade's starting point, the Peroro float flapped its wings, its long tongue spinning like a pinwheel.
"...Th-That's… Lord Peroro…?!"
I'm not sure what's so great about it, but Hifumi's eyes went wide, so I guess it worked out.
"Mika… what is that? Surely this isn't the work of that 'acquaintance' you mentioned earlier…?"
As I watched with satisfaction, Nagisa came up beside me and asked in a trembling voice. Terrified by the presence of the Peroro, her pupils were shaking violently.
"Yeah, well. You could say I made a little deal for Hifumi's sake."
"...So you've caused another incident."
"Wait! That's a misunderstanding, Nagi! When have I ever gone around causing incidents?!"
"Do you really need me to list them all for you?"
"...On second thought, I don't think that'll be necessary! So, uh, I'm sorry…"
I mean, this isn't really a mess we have to clean up, right? So in times like these, we should just enjoy it, Nagisa.
PEROPERO—!!!
"You're the absolute best, LORD PEROROOOOO!!!!!"
Just as I was thinking that the cleanup was someone else's problem, Peroro's monstrous screech shattered my thoughts. It was an unearthly sound that shouldn't exist, a sound that snapped me back to reality.
…Again, I am so sorry, Lady Nagisa. I only wanted to protect Hifumi's childhood innocence. I had no intention of unleashing such a monster upon the world.
I really mean it. Please believe me.
Once people realized the parade floats weren't a threat, they started to gather around them. The park management quickly made an announcement, claiming this was an intentional, planned event and not a situation that had spiraled out of their control.
It was shameless, but I suppose it was better than letting the incident blow up.
I was worried about how to explain the situation to my friends, but thankfully, no one pressed for details. It was a relief, since it wasn't a topic I could easily explain.
As the Momo Friends-themed floats passed by one by one, I found myself less amazed by Maestro's skill and more by the Momo Friends characters themselves, in various senses of the word.
To be honest, I didn't care much for most of them, but Peroro got a pass because of Hifumi's ecstatic reaction. Of course, it earned a "what did I just see" reaction from the rest of us, so that's a demerit.
However, I had to admit, Skullman breakdancing on top of his float was undeniably cool. It was a universal hit, and Azusa looked like she was about to die of happiness.
But the Wavecat float…
"...Mika, could you please ensure that I never lay eyes on that monstrosity ever again? This is my lifelong wish."
"No one with a normal sense of aesthetics could possibly like something like that…"
Having witnessed something that should not be, something that dealt a grave blow to my psyche, I vowed to never recall that memory for as long as I lived. It was an event that simply did not happen. In fact, Wavecat was never even in this parade.
If I didn't engage in this level of self-censorship, I didn't think I could ever continue to like Wavecat.
Seriously, I never imagined I'd see something so bizarre that it would instantly drop my favorability of Maestro from 30 to 0.
I only had one thing to say.
This is NOT my Wavecat!!!
…Anyway, the parade, which only Hifumi and Azusa seemed to have truly enjoyed, finally came to an end. A glance at my phone showed it was about time to head home.
Or rather, it was time for three of us to head home.
"See you tomorrow, Mika. Don't forget to message me when you get back."
"Bye, Mika."
"I had so much fun today, Mika! And you too, Ms. Aru!"
"Hmph, me? O-Of course! How could you not have fun with the great Aru?! That's a given!"
I entrusted the safety of my friends on their way back to Trinity to the Tea Party staff. Azusa didn't really need it, but the other two did.
Before they left, there was something I'd wanted to ask the girls from the Pater faction. I wanted to know what they thought seeing students from Trinity and Gehenna, two schools thought to be immiscible, mingling and having fun together. I wanted to ask if they still saw the two schools as oil and water, unable to ever mix.
But seeing the confused and lost looks in their eyes, I decided against it. It might be better to let them experience the summer festival for themselves and come to their own conclusions.
"Ahaha, get home safe, everyone!"
After a long day, the three of them and their escort departed, leaving just me and the girls from Problem Solver 68 at the park entrance.
As if the friendly atmosphere from moments ago had been a lie, a chilly silence fell between us.
Regardless of the friendships we'd built today, it was time for the conversation we had postponed.
"So, shall we finish our talk? Problem Solver 68, who was your client? And what exactly was the request… oh wait, didn't Aru already say it was to kidnap me?"
"Wh-What?! Th-That was all a ruse to deceive you! Huhu, yes! I was merely pretending to make a mistake and spreading false information to trick you!"
"Yeah, I don't believe you ☆. If that were really your intention, you wouldn't be revealing it now, would you?"
"Sigh, Boss..."
"..."
Kayoko sighed, and Aru's head drooped. She seems even more clueless than her in-game counterpart.
Seeing Aru's spirit crushed, Haruka's eyes darkened, but her shotgun was still in my possession. To prevent her from going on a rampage over Aru's slip-up, I decided to get straight to the point.
"I actually have a pretty good idea who your client is. It's Hanuma Makoto, right?"
"Hanuma Makoto…? Who's that?"
"I-I've never heard that name before…"
"Ah."
Right. The Gehenna kids didn't even know who their own student council president was. But since they showed no reaction to the name, she must have hidden her identity, given the shady nature of the request.
"Ufufu. Now that you mention it, I remember. When we received the down payment, the sender's name was listed as 'The Great Hanuma Ma…'"
"Wow! You're amazing, Aru! To think you remembered such a useless detail!"
"Of all people, it had to be that idiot…"
Kayoko and Mutsuki clearly knew who Makoto was. But since they said nothing, it seems they're planning to stay out of it, as usual.
Wait, a down payment…? Didn't they say they don't accept those? Was that before they established that rule?
"Makoto is the Chairman of your school's Pandemonium Society. Why I have to be the one to tell you Gehenna students this, I have no idea… but yeah. There's no one else who would request something so ridiculous."
"…Hahaha! A plausible deduction, but protecting our client's information is the lifeblood of our business. After all, no one would hire an agency they can't trust! Therefore, we—"
"For your information, I'm close friends with Gehenna's Head Prefect. A little word to Hina that you tried to kidnap me, and you'll have a warrant out for your arrest. Your accounts will be frozen, naturally…"
"...Wh-What did you say?!"
"Kufufu, but we have the down payment from this job. Aru, how much was it again?"
"Ten million yen… But no! We absolutely cannot use this until the job is done! My pride won't allow it!"
"Y-You're so cool, President Aru…!"
Wow, what is this?
Did Makoto… really pay a ten-million-yen down payment to a no-name agency for a request with a near-zero chance of success?
She's even more of an idiot than I imagined. I'm genuinely worried about how she'll survive after graduation. It's not like Iroha will be there to take care of her then.
A ten-million-yen down payment… so the final payout was probably ten times that? Knowing Makoto, that sounds about right.
"Hmm. Hey, Aru. Could you call your client for me? On speakerphone. Knowing her, it'll be much faster to talk to her directly than to try and get anything out of you guys."
If I choose my words carefully, she'll spill all the important information herself. That's just the kind of person Makoto is.
"...I suppose that much wouldn't be a problem!"
Aru called someone on her phone and switched it to speaker. A subdued, classical-sounding ringtone played for a moment before the other end picked up.
[Kikikik— I've been waiting, Problem Solver. How is the request I entrusted to you proceeding? Or could it be… you're calling because you've succeeded in kidnapping her?]
Well, well. I was sure of it, but it really is Makoto. What on earth possessed her to make a request like this?
"Ah, well, about that…"
No, Aru, that's not it. You don't need to talk to her. Just leave everything to me.
"Makoto, how could you do this to me!"
"…?!"
A moment of silence. Everyone, except for an intrigued Mutsuki, looked completely dumbfounded.
And then…
[...Hoh. So the request was completed! It's been a while, Misono Mika! Did you like the gift I sent you? Kishishishi—!!]
Just as I expected. Makoto was Makoto.
Now all that's left is to cook her just the way I like.
"What were you thinking, pulling a stunt like this?!"
[Kikikik. That's obvious…]
Alright, let's hear it. Let's hear the grand reason you used Pandemonium Society funds to orchestrate this.
If it's a lame reason, I'm seriously poaching Iroha. She was just complaining to me on MomoTalk about how hard she's working on the festival preparations. At this rate, she'd welcome me taking her away with open arms.
[To win our bet! Victory without fighting is the most perfect victory of all. If you don't show up for the festival, it's a forfeit, is it not! Kishishi!]
…We never made a rule like that, you idiot. Why are you making up your own weird delusions?
"Hey, Makoto. Just asking, but… are you scared?"
[What?! How dare you, you pigeon! There is no way that the great Gehenna Academy, led by the magnificent me, would ever lose to a mere pigeon nest!]
"But you were scared enough to hire someone to kidnap me, right? What a coward."
[…Kikik. Kikikikikik!! Your provocations are useless, Misono Mika. You've already been kidnapped, and the festival starts in four days. When you fail to appear, the morale of your pigeons will plummet. That means Gehenna's victory is all but assured!]
"Aha… I see. So you're a coward who makes a lot of excuses, Makoto."
[Hmph, blame yourself for being incompetent enough to be kidnapped by a mere club.]
…No way. You've got to be kidding me. Did she really cook up this plan just because I got kidnapped by the Gourmet Research Society? Seriously?
The reason, the motive, the process… it's all so clumsy. It's just so Makoto…
[Good work, Problem Solver. I will send the promised payment immediately. As for Misono Mika, lock her up tight somewhere remote in the Gehenna district for five days. Kishishishi—!!]
"W-Wait?! The request—"
Click.
"—was a failure…"
Makoto hung up without listening to Aru and, a moment later, actually transferred the fifty-million-yen payment. I guess I should be glad it wasn't the hundred million I'd expected. Honestly…
Well, that's that.
"Aru, you guys keep ten million, and can you send the other forty million to me? I think I need to slip about half of that to our dear tank commander, who's always suffering because of that idiot."
Makoto will be furious when I show up at the festival safe and sound, but what do I care? The Problem Solver kids are already on the Prefect Team's bad side. Adding the Pandemonium Society to the list won't change much. In fact, thanks to me, they just made twenty million yen despite failing the request. Their business might just start thriving from now on.
They'll have enough conscience not to ask for more, right?
Next, I'll take care of our dear Iroha, who has suffered and will continue to suffer because of Makoto. The other half will be my business capital.
Thank you, O Great Chairman Makoto!