Chapter 59: Which Bastard Called the Cops?!
"Achoo, achoo—!"
Ryohei, who was in the kitchen wrapping savory pork buns for the stall, turned and gave Jashin-chan a suspicious look. "Jashin-chan, are you secretly cursing me in your head?"
"..." Jashin-chan squinted at him and threateningly held up an unwrapped bun. "You want me to smear this wrapper and filling all over your face?"
"Haha, just kidding, just kidding. Don't get so worked up," Ryohei said, holding up his hands in a placating gesture.
"Seriously…" Jashin-chan grumbled. "Blaming me for your sneezing is just too much."
"I'll give you an extra portion of the crème caramel I'm making for dessert."
"Deal!" she replied instantly, her face breaking into a wide smile. Like Yurine, Jashin-chan loved crème caramel. Maybe it was contagious.
"You change your mind faster than you can flip a page," Ryohei said, shaking his head with a laugh as he went back to wrapping the buns.
"Hehe, thanks for the compliment. I am a demon, after all," she replied smugly.
"Minos and Medusa aren't like that."
"They're a disgrace to all demons," Jashin-chan declared without a moment's hesitation.
"Are you sure you're not talking about yourself?" Ryohei shot back with a sidelong glance ( ﹁ ﹁ ). He was starting to think that demon culture was actually pretty straightforward.
"What nonsense are you spouting? How could I possibly be a disgrace to all demons?!" she huffed, puffing out her chest with pride. "You might not believe this, but in the Demon World, I'm a high-ranking, noble demon from a prestigious demon family!"
"Oh, is that so?" Ryohei said with a grin. "Then I'm truly honored to have such a noble, high-ranking demon from a prestigious demon family working for me."
"..." Jashin-chan froze. The words sank in, and she slammed the half-made bun down on the table, letting out a soul-wrenching cry. "WHAT THE HELL AM I EVEN DOING WITH MY LIFE—!"
After her brief existential crisis, tempted by the promise of more of Ryohei's food and money, Jashin-chan returned to her duties as a diligent part-time worker snake.
Meanwhile, the atmosphere at the stall's usual location had changed. The arrival of the "Demon Ape" crew had put everyone on edge. After all, who could relax with a dozen "Yakuza" standing around?
The Ghouls from the crew noticed it too. Mizutani Hayato thought for a moment and then told everyone to take off their sunglasses. The shades were intimidating, and a dozen men in sunglasses standing together, even if they were just chatting, was enough to make anyone nervous.
In fact, someone had already called the police, reporting a Yakuza gathering in the area.
Before long, two police cars pulled up. Seven or eight officers got out and began questioning the bewildered members of the Demon Ape crew. Just then, Irimi Kaya arrived with her own "Black Dog" crew and some other Ghouls from Anteiku. She frowned when she saw the Demon Apes being interrogated by the police, and then she heard them loudly protesting:
"We're not Yakuza!"
Irimi paused. What's going on? Yakuza? (´･ω･`)? She didn't get it. But then her eyes fell on the sunglasses clipped to their collars, and she started to understand. A strange expression appeared on her cool face. Some of the smarter members of her own crew also figured it out, and they had to suppress their laughter.
"You'd better not be," the old, experienced police sergeant leading the squad said, his expression stern. "We'll be watching you." After finding nothing, but still feeling that something was off about the group, he gave them a final warning and then led his team away, leaving the speechless Demon Ape members behind.
Seriously! We told them we're not Yakuza! Which bastard called the cops?! Baka—! Some of the more hot-headed members started looking around, viewing every passerby with suspicion.
"I'm home~."
"Welcome back~."
Yurine had two classes that day, one in the late morning and one in the early afternoon. She got home right at 3:30.
"Yurine, have some fruit," Ryohei said. Instead of rushing her out to the stall as usual, he had prepared a fruit platter and placed it on the coffee table in the living room. As they sat down, he noticed Jashin-chan circling them with a strangely focused expression.
"What are you doing?" he asked, squinting at her. He knew that look. The scumbag snake was up to no good again.
"Kawaii—!" Yurine exclaimed, her eyes lighting up at the sight of the cute apple bunnies on the platter, arranged with strawberries and grapes. Ryohei looked at her and thought that she was even cuter.
"Ahhh~," Yurine said, picking up an apple bunny. She then took a grape and popped it into Ryohei's mouth before turning her attention to Jashin-chan.
"I'm looking for an opening!" Jashin-chan replied without thinking, her brain apparently missing a few connections. But what can you expect from a gag manga character? The moment the words left her mouth, she seemed to realize her mistake. She slapped her hands over her mouth and turned away, whistling nonchalantly.
"What's wrong with you? Do you get an itch if you don't get beaten up at least once a day?" Ryohei asked, chewing on the grape, which tasted especially sweet coming from Yurine. He looked at Jashin-chan with a resigned expression. Honestly, after getting to know her, he sometimes felt bad when she got brutally punished. His conscience was just too big.
"Whistle, whistle—!" Jashin-chan pretended not to hear, her tail still wriggling as she walked away.
"My patience has its limits, so I suggest you don't test it," Yurine said coolly. She was used to Jashin-chan's daily antics. But she was in a good mood right now and wasn't planning on punishing her, for the moment. She took a bite of an apple bunny. The crisp, sweet-tart fruit was delicious. "This is really good. You should have some too, Heian-kun," she said with a bright smile.
"Mhm." Ryohei took a strawberry, fed her a bite, and then ate the rest himself. They were in the honeymoon phase of their new relationship, and the simple act of sharing food together seemed to double their happiness.
Jashin-chan watched them feeding each other, that strange "third wheel" feeling returning. But her gaze quickly shifted to the back of Yurine's head. Her eyes lit up, and a wicked smile spread across her face.
Perfect opportunity!
"You've let your guard down, Yurine! Now that you've fallen in love, you're full of weaknesses! I'll finish you off while you're lost in your sweet little lovey-dovey moment! Next year, this day will be the anniversary of your death!"
"Finishing Move—Jashin-chan Dropkick!"
With a string of machine-gun-like taunts, Jashin-chan leaped into the air, her face a mask of vicious intent as her thick green snake tail swung down hard at Yurine's head.
"Die—!"