MC POV —
"Oh, one last thing," said that smug cosmic bastard — the ROB. "I've made a few edits. Some little tweaks. Trust me, you'll like them. Unlocked a bit more... creativity. Chaos. Conflict."
I narrowed my eyes.
"Wha—?"
I didn't even get to finish that sentence. The dimensional gate yawned open and yoinked me out like I was on some cosmic roller coaster with no safety harness.
I knew reincarnation wouldn't come cheap — there's always a price for power, especially when a cheeky god-thing smiles like that. But the way he said "tweaks"? Yeah, no. That was never a good sign. That was the kind of tone people use before dropping spoilers and bombs — metaphorical and literal.
If I'd known what he meant?
I'd still have agreed.
Because I'm not a coward — I'm just dramatic.
The first sensation after darkness was… awful.
Not painful, not loud — just gross.
Everything was wet, squishy, and too damn bright. I couldn't see jack at first, only hear muffled screaming, like someone had parked a banshee next to my head. Then I was yanked out into the cold, like a prize at a very disturbing carnival game.
Wrapped in a towel. Cranky. Confused. Probably covered in stuff I didn't want to think about.
"It's a girl! Red hair, strong lungs — like her mother!"
Hold. Up.
Did she just say "girl"?
Son of a—
I distinctly remember dying with the parts of a man, thank you very much. And red hair? Uzumaki vibes all over the place. Yay for chakra reserves and epic screaming potential. Boo for the whole gender-switch surprise.
"Minato… look at her…"
Boom. Baby transfer.
Now I was in someone else's arms. Bigger. Stronger. Radiating dad energy and stress hormones.
And if I heard correctly, then let me guess — Fourth Hokage, legendary ninja, king of bad work-life balance: Minato freaking Namikaze.
Before I could even mentally roast him for dying young, another scream tore through the air. The midwives shouted, and I heard another baby's cry.
Twin confirmed.
So, new body: check. New gender: reluctantly check. New hair: spicy check.A twin? A hell yes from the other side of the room, because a few seconds later—I felt it.
A connection — raw, primal, unexplainable. Like a thread tied around my soul.
Naruto.
My new brother.
My jaw would've dropped if, you know, I had muscle control.
I was his sister. No — his older sister. Firstborn. The DLC character nobody saw coming.
And that… oh, that opened so many doors.
Protective instincts? Already online.
Manipulation plans? Drafting.
Plot domination arc? In motion.
But my stupid baby body had other plans.
Sleep Mode: Activated.
Ugh.
Round two: I woke up to a claw the size of a damn tree trunk impaling both my parents.
And trust me when I say this whatever you say the sight of the claw scared me shitless. But hey at least we know:
Donut Club: Founding Members – Minato & Kushina.
Kushina was crying and smiling, doing her dying-mom speech about ramen and friendship and don't do drugs, and all I could think was:
Lady, if I have to make friends with the idiots in this world, I'm starting my own village.
But I will not say no to a few members, such as the cute and shy Hinata, the smart one in this village of idiots, Shikamaru, don't judge me I need a strategist and a sharp mind to keep me active mentally.
Minato followed Kushina's speech by doing something incredibly badass and incredibly reckless: the Dead Demon Consuming Seal.
He split the Nine Tails in half — sealed one part in my golden crybaby of a brother, and the other in me. Because why not give the gender-bent wild card baby half of an angry chakra nuke?
Well played, Dad. I approve.
It wasn't subtle. I felt it immediately — the weight of that power. The burning coil of rage and hatred wrapped around a primal force. Kurama was in there, snarling like a caged monster… and I was already plotting how to make him mine.
Don't worry, Foxy. We're gonna have fun.
Then, for a moment, everything paused. I was warm, safe-ish, and weirdly proud of surviving day one of the Naruto timeline without exploding.
That's when I heard it — not aloud, but in that annoying back-of-the-head way.
"Well? What do you think, my little wildcard?"
ROB. Of course he was still watching. Probably eating popcorn and laughing his celestial ass off.
I couldn't speak yet, but if I could, I'd say:
"Next time you tweak me, maybe don't gender beend me without telling me."
But truthfully?
This was better than anything I could've dreamed. I had power. I had purpose. I had a brother to protect, and a world to break in all the best ways.
Name drop moment: Kushina had whispered it before she died.
Mito. Mito Uzumaki.
Named after the woman who raised her. A legacy name.
How fitting.
Because the original Mito sealed the Nine Tails too.
But me?
I'd do more than seal it.
I'd own it.