Chapter 183: My Heart is So Tired, I Really Want to Retire
In the black space, Kobayashi's back was slumped against the wooden chair, as if his entire body had no bones.
He tilted his head back, his body sinking down, the light gone from his eyes. He was the very picture of a salted fish with no more dreams.
And opposite him was a large chair, upon which sat a petite, cute goddess, her face a mask of awkwardness, as if she wanted to comfort him but didn't know how.
Eris scratched her cheek and asked softly, "Um... Mr. Kobayashi?"
"Aaaaaaaaaah!!!" he suddenly let out a loud howl.
"E-eh?!"
The sudden howl startled the kind goddess. She curled up her body, trembling pitifully, shocked by the man's sudden, frightening action.
But this was only the beginning.
He began to complain loudly, pouring out his grievances to her. "That idiot goddess! She always drops the ball at the critical moment! We were this close to a magnificent ending, but she just had to set off a huge firework at the very end! Was she trying to celebrate? Celebrate with my life?! Besides, was that a 'small problem'?! It was an explosion! An explosion! Can you call that a 'small problem'?!"
I'm tired. Just destroy it all, quickly.
His eyes were dim and lightless, and he had returned to his previous state of a salted fish that had lost all hope in life.
"Th-that is... I'm sorry."
She really didn't know how to comfort him and could only apologize in a low voice.
What a kind goddess!
He couldn't help but sigh.
It clearly wasn't her fault, yet she was apologizing just to make him feel a little better.
He was beginning to regret his previous choice.
He looked at her and couldn't help but ask, "Can I really not swap them?"
"...I'm sorry, you can't."
"I thought as much."
Her answer was as expected. His question just now had only been a subconscious hope.
"I... maybe I should just go to heaven like this," he muttered.
He had to take care of those problem children every day, and they were always causing trouble for him, forcing him to wipe their asses.
This kind of life was simply too tormenting.
My heart is so tired. I really want to retire.
Eris couldn't stand to see anyone so dejected. She quickly perked up. "Mr. Kobayashi, please don't be so pessimistic! Please try to think on the bright side! At the very least, you saved the villagers of Axel, didn't you?"
"Hehe. If it hadn't exploded, then yes, I would have saved the villagers," he said, his laugh full of frustration.
The core of the Destroyer was a Coronatite.
It was a stone with a huge amount of energy, capable of powering the giant mobile fortress for hundreds of years. One could imagine the energy it contained.
It was at least ten times stronger than Explosion magic. It wouldn't be an exaggeration to call it a nuke.
Originally, his plan was to push the mobile fortress into the sky. After reaching a sufficient height, he would quickly retreat. That way, even if it exploded, it wouldn't affect Axel. Even the falling fragments would be mostly burned up due to the high speed.
However—
When it exploded, not only had it not left the town, but the mecha's own explosion had caused secondary damage to Axel.
Many adventurers and villagers must have been injured.
Thinking of this, his expression became extremely pained.
Eris also understood his distress. She also often ran to the mortal world to clean up other people's messes. On top of that, the Destroyer had passed through the town she was in some time ago, so she naturally knew how terrifying it was.
She didn't know how to comfort him either.
The two were silent for a moment.
On the contrary, he was the first to snap out of it. He slapped his cheeks. Smack! His cheeks turned red.
She looked at him with a puzzled gaze.
He had forced himself to wake up and to stop thinking about those messy things. At the very least, he knew that being hit by the blast wave was better than being flattened by the Destroyer.
He told her his thoughts, and received the goddess's high praise.
The kind goddess encouraged him, "That's right, Mr. Kobayashi! The Destroyer's power is for all to see. Even if there were some mistakes, no matter what, you still saved the town! You can absolutely puff out your chest with pride! You could even be called a hero in the kingdom!"
"I hope so," he said, and could only force himself to be optimistic for now.
The atmosphere lightened up a little.
Then, he began to think. Because the Destroyer had come too quickly, there were still some things he hadn't figured out. Now that the incident was over, he had a lot of questions to ask.
He also had questions for her.
"Eris, I remember asking you to lure the Destroyer away before, right? And you told me that its course had been changed to an uninhabited, deep mountain. But why did it correct its course and come back?" he asked.
She pressed her hand to her chin, her expression thoughtful. "That's what I'm wondering too. I clearly led it away. Why did it come back? I remember that the only thing that attracts it is a sudden burst of powerful energy, but it's winter now and no one is out doing quests."
"...Wait, a-sudden burst of powerful energy?"
"That's right. After all, it's a weapon of war for fighting the Demon King's army. It goes wherever there's a battle. And the characteristic of Coronatite is that it's easily attracted to heat, which is why it wanders around and destroys everything."
As she explained, his expression turned sour.
He remembered the chain explosion from before.
That's right. It was because he had gotten hot-headed and insisted on taking out the Winter Shogun, and had used several hundred crystal bombs to cause that huge destruction.
So it was that?!
By the way... it's all my fault!
His expression was very conflicted. With no one to blame, he suddenly didn't know how to vent his anger.
"Um... Mr. Kobayashi?"
"It's... it's nothing."
He hesitated for a moment, but in the end, he told her the truth.
After hearing the reason, the kind goddess's whole being went limp. She wanted to blame him, but the words wouldn't come out.
Not only did he not know the reason for the Destroyer's actions, but even if the route hadn't been changed, it would have eventually headed for Axel anyway. Most importantly, the man before her had saved Axel.
Eris didn't say anything, but he still didn't dare to look at her.
A silent rebuke is the most painful.
Fortunately, Aqua's voice cut in. "Hey! Kobayashi! You can be resurrected! Hurry up and come back from that chest-padding goddess!"
It was extremely rude and overbearing.
He could see that Eris was not in a good state. The goddess's face was bright red and her eyes were watery. She looked pitiful, as if she were begging him not to spread it.
She's probably forgotten that I've already spread 'Eris pads her chest' as a doctrine throughout the entire Holy Kingdom.
Of course, he wasn't going to be tactless.
He gave her a look to assure her that he wouldn't spread it, then hurriedly said goodbye to her and ascended, following Aqua's summons.
He opened his eyes again. A water-blue figure was close by.
He could smell the sweet fragrance coming from her and see the concern in her pure, water-blue eyes.
His heart warmed.
Seeing him open his eyes, Aqua relaxed. "Phew, you scared me to death. Half of your body was gone. I thought even my goddess authority couldn't resurrect you. Hmph, as expected of me!"
Give me back my touching moment, you idiot goddess!
"Wow, he's really resurrected!" Megumin exclaimed.
Darkness also said, "As expected of the most amazing Archpriest in Axel! You're amazing, Aqua!"
Kazuma pouted. "This is the only thing she's good for."
He's right. This is the only thing she's good for.
He deeply agreed on this point.
RyuZU gently caressed his cheek. "To be resurrected even with half a body gone? What tenacious life force. Just like a cockroach."
The usual sharp tongue annoyed Aqua.
She yelled, "Wait, wait! Shouldn't you all be praising me at a time like this? To be able to resurrect such a tattered Kobayashi... isn't that all my doing?"
Hearing this, he also got annoyed. "Well then, which idiot goddess was the one who got me blown to smithereens in the first place? Hmm?!"
"Th-that is..."
Aqua's eyes darted all over the place, not daring to answer.
Of course she was guilty. No matter how you looked at it, it was her fault that the mecha had exploded.
Most importantly, she hadn't told him about the hidden danger of the mecha exploding. She had thought it wasn't a big deal and had hidden it.
He sat up crisply. This scared her, and she immediately ran behind Darkness, peeking her head out timidly, terrified that he would hold her accountable.
But he was in no mood to scold her right now.
He stood up and looked around.
Because the explosion had not been high enough, the beginner town of Axel had still been affected. Countless stones and mecha fragments were scattered all over the town, and the houses and streets were all in tatters. But that was the good part. The worst was the plain. Because the Destroyer had been continuously firing its beams from its underside, the entire plain was now pockmarked.
As far as the eye could see, it was a scene of devastation.
It was too tragic.
He let out a faint sigh, and at the same time, felt a sense of relief.
In an explosion of this intensity, for him to still have half a body left... he could be said to be lucky.
What he was even more thankful for was that he hadn't been wearing the necklaces when he was piloting the mecha.
Yes.
When he had had a bad feeling, he had specially taken off the blue crystal necklace and the elven sigil necklace and had given them to RyuZU for safekeeping.
After all, Aqua could be resurrected indefinitely, but he was more worried about his equipment.
Who told him to like equipment so much?
He looked at the villagers who were continuously coming in from the other city gate and asked, "Were any of the villagers injured this time?"
"No," Kazuma replied. "Because the villagers evacuated in time, no one was injured."
"What about the adventurers?"
"Them either. Or rather, they were injured, but they were all healed by the idiot Archpriest next to them."
"Is that so."
He nodded, relieved.
Just at this moment, Dust and the other adventurers also came over, surrounding him excitedly. They immediately surrounded him, and their hands began to roam all over his body.
He cringed, his shoulders shrinking.
Because of the explosion, his clothes had been destroyed. Although RyuZU had managed to put a pair of pants on him in time, his upper body was still bare.
To be touched by a group of men... anyone would be nervous and scared, right?
But don't misunderstand, they didn't have any strange ideas. Instead, they knocked him down, lifted him up, and began to toss him high in the air, catching him steadily, over and over again.
"That was awesome, Kobayashi!"
"You saved the town!"
"You're my hero!"
"Hero!"
"Hero!"
"Hero!"
...
...
Cheers erupted on the city walls, continuously spreading, reaching the ears of the other adventurers, the ears of the villagers who had just returned to the town, and the ears of everyone.
Just like that, he became the hero who had saved the town.
...Even though he felt guilty and didn't think he was qualified to be called a hero.
Megumin really liked this kind of scene. She looked at him with a fervent gaze. This wasn't a feeling of love or adoration, but of envy. She also wanted to be the one to turn the tide, save the town, and then be sung about as a hero. That was why she was so keen on defeating the Demon King, to spread her name.
Kazuma was the exact opposite. If he had to die and be blown up to become a hero, then he would pass. Not to mention, even if the mecha had exploded, it wasn't certain that he could have stopped the Destroyer.
Darkness smiled gently, silently looking at him, it was unknown what she was thinking.
RyuZU also had a smile on her lips. For him to be able to shine so brightly, as his attendant, she also shared in the glory.
The most pitiful one was Aqua.
This idiot goddess was constantly trying to take credit. She, who loved to show off, really wanted to show her presence, but unfortunately, the protagonist this time was him. Naturally, there was no chance for her to be in the spotlight.
After a while of commotion.
"Kobayashi! Don't you have anything to say?"
"What?"
"Something you want to say... don't you have anything?"
Just as every battle must have an ending, and every award must have an acceptance speech, Dust was also urging him to say something.
Whether it was words of encouragement or words of inspiration.
He, who had come from a knighthood, understood very well that this was a great opportunity to build his reputation.
He thought for a moment and said, "I want to say that stopping the Destroyer this time was not my personal achievement, or rather, it was not the achievement of any one person. It was all thanks to everyone's help. It was you who evacuated the villagers, you who set up the traps, and you who lured the Destroyer, that I was able to let go and have a big fight. This is our shared victory!"
"Ooooooooooh!!!"
"Well said!"
"That's right, that's right!"
The crowd clapped and cheered.
This was just the simplest of pleasantries, but it was just so nice to hear. Even if what they had done was useless, and they could only watch from the sidelines, he still hadn't forgotten them.
This, in an instant, had greatly enhanced his popularity.
The entire town of Axel was immersed in a sea of joy.
To be able to successfully intercept the Mobile Fortress Destroyer... even if the town and the plains had been mostly destroyed, that was still capital to brag about.
Originally, they couldn't have said it, because they hadn't contributed.
But now, it was different.
He had said that this was everyone's achievement. Of course they could thick-skinnedly say that they had also contributed, and brag in the guild all day about what they had done at the time. Even if it was just setting a trap, they had to blow it up to be the key to stopping the Destroyer.
And while everyone was still immersed in the joy, his whole being was not well.
His hand was holding a piece of paper, trembling slightly.
On it was written:
[Debt: 89,000,000 Eris]
That's right. It all had to start with this receipt in front of him.
(End of Chapter)