"Feeding him, I give food—
But he feeds the hunger I cannot name."
—Nil
Kao's steps were unhurried, but his nearness was a tide—silent, irresistible. By the time Nil realized, those long arms had already circled his waist from behind. The warmth of Kao's chest pressed against his back. Nil could feel the slow rise and fall of his breathing, could hear the faint,
'Thud'
A heartbeat against his spine.
"You've prepared so many dishes," Kao murmured, the words low enough to stir the fine hairs at Nil's nape. "What about dessert?"
Nil's shoulders twitched. His head tilted slightly, their profiles almost touching, breath mingling, "I didn't think about that," he admitted.
His voice faint, lips brushing dangerously close to Kao's, "Then,"
"what sweet dish do you like most?" Nil spoke, while Kao's arms tightened, drawing Nil a fraction closer.
Nil's pulse stumbled, "...Stranger... if you don't let go—"
Kao's reply cut him off, smooth but edged with heat.
"A kiss might compare to dessert..."
A flush crept across Nil's cheeks, hot enough to burn. He tried to speak with poise, but his breath betrayed him, "Dessert...''
"Umm...desert!''
"Should be eaten after the meal."
Kao lowered his head until his jaw grazed the curve of Nil's neck, the rough edge of stubble catching on skin. His lips hovered, brushing as he spoke,
"Don't be cruel...'' soft.
''Just one will be enough." low as begging.
Nil's lashes trembled. He tilted his head back, exposing the vulnerable line of his throat, their lips now a breath apart. Kao's eyes fluttered shut, and their lips hovered on the verge of meeting. Kao's eyes closed in anticipation, his grip tightening... and then—
Nil's gaze sharpened. A flicker of mischief. In one swift motion, he leaned forward, pressing a fleeting kiss to Kao's mouth—barely there, like tasting the first drop of rain—and then pushed him back with one hand. "Just one," he said.
Kao blinked, froze for a beat. "...Not fair," he said at last, voice thick.
"That wasn't dessert," he accused, brow furrowing slightly.
"Cheating," he added, the word half-growled.
Nil's lips curled into a mocking smile.
"You asked for one kiss.''
''Not two. ''
''Not a long one."
Kao emerged from the kitchen, his expression small and lost, like a child robbed of cotton candy. His gaze swept the room, and for a moment, his expression stilled—there was a perfectly set dining table just a few steps away, yet Nil had laid the meal on the floor, smoothing out two thin mats.
"Nil..." Kao's voice was low. "Why aren't we using the table?"
Nil looked up at him, his dark eyes catching the light, a smile blooming there like a sudden dawn,
"In our home, we never had a dining table. After cooking, Ma would just call out to us, and me and Didi would sit in front of her, on the floor."
Kao's lips curved faintly.
Nil's voice softened, "She'd serve us on steel plates... "
"Sometimes, she'd feed us with her own hand."
Nil straightened, brushing his palms against his knees, and glanced at Kao with concern,
"Stranger... are you comfortable sitting on the floor?"
"If you'd rather, I can move everything to the table."
Kao stepped forward without hesitation. The subtle shift of his weight made the floor creak faintly. Then, with a motion both casual and deliberate, he lowered himself onto the mat, the line of his shoulders relaxed. His hand found Nil's wrist—cool skin, quickened pulse—and with a gentle tug, he pulled him down as well. Nil lost balance slightly, his knee brushing against Kao's thigh.
Kao's voice was quiet but unyielding,
"I'm happy to sit anywhere, so long as you're with me."
Nil's skin, quickening his heartbeat as those words seemed to slide beneath His cheeks, already tinged pink from the kitchen heat, deepened in color. He ducked his head, breath catching,
"...Stranger," he murmured, almost reproachfully.
Kao's gaze didn't waver. The corners of his mouth lifted in a slow, "Let's dig in," he said.
Nil was about to serve the Kichdi onto two plates, hands steady but eyes flicking toward Kao. Before he could, Kao reached over and lifted one plate.
"I want to eat with you. In one plate."
Nil's brows knitted, a faint flush warming his cheeks. "Stranger... don't you think you're being... so romantic today?"
Kao's dark eyes widened and earnest. "Is this a crime?"
Nil's lips curved awkwardly, a soft stammer in his voice,
"But... every word of yours..." He paused,
"Heart fluttering"
"...it's stroking my heart!"
Kao leaned closer, "Did you just say something?"
Nil averted his eyes, cheeks hot, as he carefully scooped the Kichdi onto a single plate. His fingers trembled slightly, betraying the calm he tried to keep.
"No... I didn't..."
At last, the plate held the warm Kichdi, flanked by the golden Aloo bhorta and the crisp Begun Bhaja. Kao's gaze swept the food, then tilted toward Nil.
"Where's the spoon?"
Nil's dark eyes met his, "Bengalis love eating with their hands... and it brings out the flavor. Makes the food taste better."
Kao exhaled, slow and low, a corner of his lips tugging upward. "Alright..."
The room glowed with warm golden light. Kao and Nil sat on the floor, legs crossed, facing each other, knees almost brushing. The balcony was open, and a soft chill drifted in, mixing with the warm aroma of spices. The distant hum of Bangkok traffic barely touched.
Nil scooped a small mound of Kichdi with his fingers, blending the sharp mustard bite of Aloo Bhorta with the soft, smoky flesh of Begun Bhaja. He pressed it carefully, lifting it toward Kao's lips.
Kao's steadily, lips parting just enough, breath hitching slightly. Nil fed him, fingertips brushing the edge of his mouth. Kao chewed slowly, savoring the heat, the mingled flavors,
While, Nil's gaze stayed fixed on him with curiosity, "How is it?"
His voice trembled softly, heart quickening! Kao swallowed, eyes never leaving Nil's.
"...Do you like it?" Nil asked.
Kao's lips were pressed thin, eyes glossy with a sheen of moisture. Nil's excitement faltered, the sparkle in his gaze dimming,
"Sorry, Stranger... I should have let you order."
"It's my first time..." His eyes lowered, hopeless.
Kao shook his head faintly, a slow smile tugging at the corners of his lips.
"Fine... I ordered it." he retorted.
Nil began to stand, but Kao's hand caught his wrist, holding him in place.
"Nil... it's too good."
Nil's brows furrowed, "Those... tears?"
Kao's eyes met his, shimmering, "It's just a little spicy... ''
"But I've never tasted anything like this. Too good..."
" More..."
A small smile curved Nil's lips. He leaned forward, another bite. Kao's eyes widened, soft exclamation escaping him. "Wahhh..."
Then Kao scooped up a mound of Kichdi himself, lifting it to Nil's lips,
"I never knew... love could taste this beautiful." Nil murmured, "Stranger... never leave me."
Kao stayed silent, setting Nil take the bite first.
And then, again and again, they fed each other.
The dinner was done. Meanwhile Kao noticed a stray grain of rice clinging to Nil's lips. His fingers hovered, deliberate, before brushing it away, tracing the curve of Nil's mouth, soft, full, the pale pink tipped with the faint sheen of the meal he had eaten.
The subtle rise and fall as he breathed, drew Kao like a tide he could not resist. Each tremble, each tiny parting, made Kao's chest tighten.
"Enough," Kao whispered low and commanding.
Nil's fingers twitched, still warm from the meal, but he didn't pull away. His chest rose rapidly, a soft. Kao leaned in, slow, deliberate. His lips met Nil's—soft, teasing at first. Nil's lips parted instinctively, small moans pressing past them,
"Mmmph..."
Kao's hands slid to Nil's waist, pulling him flush against his body. Nil shivered, hips tilting. His hands clutched at Kao's wrists, holding him closer, needing the contact. His pulse hammered, fingers trembling, lips wet and hot.
"Ahh..." Nil gasped.
Pressing closer, opening, tasting Kao in return. His body arched instinctively, pressing into every touch, every curve of Kao's chest.
Kao's thumb brushed along Nil's jaw, tilting his head, lips parting to deepen the kiss. His mouth moved with deliberate slowness, sucking, nipping, dragging heat across Nil's lips.
Kao's grip tightened at the small of Nil's back, pressing him harder. Nil's body trembled, small whimpers slipping out, his hips brushing instinctively, begging without words.
"Do you feel me?" Kao murmured against his lips, fingers tracing along Nil's sides.
Nil nodded, breathless, ''You..!''
"Already...I...Inside—"
Minutes passed, and still their mouths clung, a tether neither would release. Nil's eyes rolled instinctively toward the entrance, panic flickering through his lashes, but Kao remained eyes closed, lips locked, tongue brushing, sucking.
A sharp shift—Nil pushed him, not violently, but enough to signal the intrusion of reality,
"Str..." still staring at door.
''Strangerrr...''
Kao's hands remained firm on Nil's waist, tilting him closer before his own gaze flicked to the doorway, "Than..."
Than stood frozen, eyes wide, body taut with shock.
Kao's ears burned, a dark, raw flush coloring his features, the veins at his temple tense. The kiss had left traces: lips swollen, glistening, soft tremors running through them, breath mingling, shallow, ragged.
"You..." Kao's voice broke in a frustrated sigh, low, guttural.
Than's presence pressed awkwardly, "Ahhh... sorry," he stammered.
"Umm, I think I should leave now." Voice trembling.
Nil's face flared scarlet. He fumbled with his hands, twisting the hem of his shirt, unable to meet Than's gaze. "Thannn... there's nothing—nothing like what you're thinking," he blurted.
Words tumbling out in a rush.
He stepped forward, then back, anxious, hands fluttering as if caught in a storm.
"Why... why don't you join us? I... I cooked..."
Than hesitated, glancing at the spread on the floor, "In fact, I came here to ask about your food," he said softly.
Nil's shoulders slumped slightly, heat crawling up his neck. His eyes darted, refusing to linger,
"Ooo... ''
"Sweet of you, Than," he murmured.
Kao's gaze darkened, a storm coiling in his chest as Nil chattered, persistently inviting Than to stay. Every word, every gesture fanned the sharp spike of possessiveness.
Than met Kao's eyes, freezing for a moment. The message was clear—this was not a place to crash. "I... already had dinner," he muttered, voice hesitant.
Kao stepped forward, slow, deliberate, the shadows under his eyes deepening, lips curved in a cold line,
"Before entering anyone's personal space," he said, voice low, controlled,
"You should knock on the door first."
Than didn't reply, he couldn't.
Nil, moving just slightly, leaned close, murmuring into Kao's ear, voice soft, warm.
"Strangerrr... he's already nervous...''
"Don't scare him!"
Kao stare at Nil, "...''
"I'm just asking...!"
Than's shoulders stiffened. He couldn't stay,
"I... I'm leaving," he said finally and then turned on his heel, "Good night..."
Nil called after him, but Than didn't respond—he ran, leaving Kao and Nil in the quiet aftershock.
Kao's gaze fixed on Nil, "Didn't you close the door?"
Nil's shoulders sank; he drew in a deep,
"...I thought you'd closed it already." His eyes flickered away.
Without a word, Kao stepped closer. His hand came to rest on Nil's shoulder—not heavy, but firm,
"It's all right," Kao said.
His eyes did not waver from Nil's. "Sooner or later, everyone will know about our relationship."
A faint curve touched his lips— "Better he finds out now."