The low hum of laughter followed me out of the dining room, but I didn't slow my pace until the heavy doors swung shut behind me. The silence in the hallway was immediate, wrapping around me like a cloak. My jaw ached—I hadn't realized I'd been grinding my teeth for half the night.
I loosened the button on my suit jacket and let out a slow breath. I'd told myself I could handle it. Dinner. Elijah's friends. Lyra at the same table. I'd even convinced myself that if I kept my distance, if I said little, if I focused on meaningless conversation, the evening would pass without incident.
I'd been wrong.
Every laugh that escaped her lips, every time her eyes softened when someone else addressed her—it clawed at me. I shouldn't have been watching her at all, yet I couldn't stop. And when she smiled, even just politely, it burned in my chest in a way I hadn't prepared for.
I leaned against the wall, loosening my tie, forcing myself to think. The woman beside me during dinner had leaned in more times than I cared to count. I let her, because it kept my hands busy, my expression neutral. It gave me something to focus on that wasn't Lyra. But then—every time I looked across the table, her gaze caught mine, wide and uncertain, and it felt like a battle I was destined to lose.
Damn it. She was Elijah's sister. That thought had become my anchor, my only line of defense. Elijah, who trusted me more than anyone. Elijah, who would break me in half if he ever suspected how I thought about her.
And yet, the moment she bit her lip, trying not to smile at some stupid remark, my restraint nearly snapped.
A door creaked somewhere down the hall, jolting me out of my thoughts. I straightened, schooling my features back into calm indifference. The last thing I needed was for someone—especially her—to stumble upon me like this, raw and restless.
I checked my watch, more for distraction than necessity. Twenty minutes more of this dinner, maybe thirty. I could survive it. I had survived worse.
But even as I told myself that, a part of me knew: surviving Lyra was a war I had already lost.