Chapter 410: Very Different Guild Members
Noah gently nudged the large wooden door, pushing it open just enough to create a tiny crack. He pressed his eye against the gap, silently observing the interior of the guild.
The rest of the strike team immediately scrambled to get a look as well.
Ultear, Wendy, Yukino, and Meredy crouched down below Noah to peek through the lower half of the crack. Laxus, Natsu, and Gajeel decided the best strategy was to literally climb onto Noah's back to see over his head.
Laxus was the first to slap his hands onto Noah's shoulders, practically draping himself over the younger mage's back. Natsu and Gajeel immediately piled on top of Laxus.
Caught completely off guard by the sudden weight of three heavily muscled men, Noah nearly collapsed face-first into the door. He shot a vicious, lethal glare back at Laxus, but the Lightning Dragon Slayer completely ignored him, his eyes glued to the crack in the door.
Sighing helplessly, Noah returned his focus to the inside of the guildhall.
Mystogan didn't join the ridiculous human pyramid, but he quietly observed the interior from a slight distance.
Inside the rustic, root-woven building, dozens of people were scattered around wooden tables. Just like their own Fairy Tail, the members were drinking and chatting.
"The atmosphere here... feels way different from our guild," Happy whispered from the bottom of the pile.
Everyone instantly realized what he meant. While the alternate guild was indeed chatting and drinking, it was incredibly quiet and subdued. There were no chairs flying through the air, no magic being thrown around, and absolutely no one violently brawling in the center of the room.
"Yeah..." The entire strike team nodded in unanimous agreement.
"Is that the request board?" Carla asked, pointing toward the back of the room.
"It looks like it. And it's pretty fully stocked," Noah noted, utilizing his enhanced vision to scan the distant board.
Just like their own guild, the board was covered in a wide variety of job requests. Thankfully, a quick scan confirmed that they were all completely normal, legal jobs; there were no assassination requests or dark guild activities listed. Noah breathed a small sigh of relief. Even though this guild was actively being hunted by the kingdom, they hadn't compromised their morals or turned to the dark side.
"Wait... the girl standing in front of the request board... isn't that..." Gray muttered in shock.
Everyone followed his gaze. Standing near the board was a young woman with familiar sky-blue hair. She wore a cropped top that exposed her midriff, paired with a short skirt and thigh-high stockings. As she turned around, her face was revealed perfectly.
"Juvia is going to head out for a job now," the woman announced to the room.
"Stay safe out there," a man who looked exactly like Macao replied warmly.
"W-W-Wait! Wait just a second, Juvia-chan!"
Hearing that desperately pleading, overly affectionate voice, Gray violently flinched. The tone, the inflection—everything about it gave him a deeply horrifying premonition.
"I-I want to come with you... or something..."
A man who looked exactly like Gray practically threw himself into the conversation.
The Edolas Gray was wearing at least five layers of heavy winter coats, completely burying his entire body in thick clothing. He had a massive, chunky scarf wrapped around his neck and thick winter mittens on his hands.
"God, you are so annoying! Exactly how many layers are you wearing right now?! Don't even talk to me until you take some of those off!" Edolas Juvia snapped, glaring at him with pure, unadulterated disgust.
"B-But I get cold so easily!" Edolas Gray whined, desperately reaching out to grab Edolas Juvia's arm as she walked away.
"What the hell is this?!" Natsu gaped in sheer disbelief.
Gray's jaw practically unhinged and hit the floor. The rest of the team stared in stunned silence. They all knew exactly how much Gray despised the cold; the idiot subconsciously stripped his clothes off every five minutes. Seeing a version of Gray buried in winter gear and desperately simping for Juvia felt like a literal fever dream.
"Man, Gray is way too clingy," Edolas Warren sighed, shaking his head.
"What can you do? A man in love is overflowing with passion," Edolas Macao chuckled, spreading his hands.
"You're completely useless, Elfman!"
"Did you seriously fail another job?!"
Two highly aggressive, familiar voices rang out. The team instantly shifted their gaze and spotted two men who looked exactly like Jet and Droy. However, unlike the pathetic, easily depressed duo in Earth Land, these two were practically overflowing with intense, confident alpha-male energy.
"I'm... I'm so sorry..."
Standing in front of them was Edolas Elfman. He had short white hair, wore a simple sleeveless vest, and had massive tears streaming down his face as he openly wept in shame.
"Hey, look! Jet and Droy, the two strongest candidates in the guild, are lecturing Elfman again."
"They should probably dial it back a bit..." Edolas Macao and Warren muttered to each other.
"What?! Jet and Droy are the absolute strongest mages in the guild?!" Sorano gasped quietly. She simply couldn't reconcile the image of those two with the title of 'strongest.'
"Actually... he looks exactly like the old Elfman. This is making me kind of nostalgic," Mirajane whispered softly, a fond smile touching her lips.
Before the tragic incident with the Beast King that supposedly killed Lisanna, Earth Land Elfman had been incredibly soft-spoken, gentle, and easily brought to tears, exactly like the man crying before them. He had only adopted his aggressive, overly macho "A REAL MAN!" persona to cope with the trauma.
"Work! I need work! Gotta stay active!"
A hyper-energetic voice boomed through the hall as a man identical to Nab practically sprinted past the tables.
"Nab, you're working way too hard!"
"Seriously, take a break once in a while!" The other members called out to him.
"Is that actually Nab?! He's actually aggressively searching for jobs?!" Lucy gasped, clapping her hands over her mouth. In Earth Land, Nab literally spent his entire life loitering in front of the request board, perpetually claiming he was looking for a job "only he could do" without ever actually taking one.
"Hey Cana, come grab a drink with us!"
"Over here!" Edolas Macao and Wakaba called out to a woman sitting at a nearby table.
"Well, at least those two haven't changed at all," Carla noted dryly.
"Mhm," Wendy agreed quietly.
"I've told you guys a hundred times... I really... can't handle alcohol..."
A soft, incredibly gentle, and polite voice answered them. The entire Earth Land strike team froze.
"No way..." Cana whispered, her entire body shuddering violently.
Everyone looked toward the table. Sitting there was a woman wearing an elegant, flowing dress and a pristine white blouse. A delicate sun hat adorned with beautiful flowers rested on her head. Her hands were politely folded in her lap, and she radiated an aura of pure, refined elegance.
She had the exact same face as Cana.
"Is that... Cana?!" Ultear gasped. Earth Land Cana was a legendary heavy drinker who could drink the entire guild under the table while brawling with Macao and Wakaba. Seeing a hyper-polite, alcohol-intolerant, ladylike version of her was profoundly disturbing.
"Is that actually me...?" Cana gripped her own hair, feeling physically nauseous at the sight of her alternate self acting so refined.
"Bis-Bis~!"
"Oh, Al-Al~!"
A sickeningly sweet, romantic exchange drew the team's attention. Sitting closely together in a booth were Edolas Bisca and Alzack. Edolas Bisca was practically sitting in Edolas Alzack's lap, her arms wrapped tightly around his neck as they aggressively flirted. A thick, suffocatingly pink aura of pure romance radiated from them, causing the surrounding guild members to violently turn their heads away in disgust or just leave the area entirely.
"Wah!" Wendy, Yukino, and Meredy shrieked quietly, immediately covering their eyes with their hands—though they all naturally peeked through their fingers, their faces burning bright red.
"Hmm. Very good. The Edolas versions of Bisca and Alzack clearly cherish each other and don't waste time hiding their feelings. Excellent," Erza nodded in absolute, serious approval.
"Seriously, you need to get it together!"
"Stop crying already!"
"Waaaah..."
Edolas Jet and Droy were still aggressively lecturing Edolas Elfman, who was violently sobbing into his hands.
"I love you, Juvia!" Edolas Gray declared passionately.
Noah could literally feel Earth Land Gray vibrating violently against his back in sheer, unadulterated cringe.
"Shut up, Gray! Why the hell are you wearing so many layers?!" Edolas Reedus roared angrily at Edolas Gray.
"HAHAHAHA! Oh my god, you look so incredibly pathetic!" Natsu cackled from the top of the dogpile, utterly failing to contain his laughter at the sight of simp-Gray.
"You bastard!" Gray snarled, instantly trying to twist around and punch Natsu in the face.
"Don't move, you idiots!" Noah hissed.
But it was too late. The violent thrashing between Natsu and Gray instantly destabilized the precarious human pyramid. Laxus and Gajeel lost their balance and violently collapsed forward, directly slamming their full weight into Noah's back.
Caught completely off guard by the massive impact, Noah stumbled forward and violently crashed into Ultear, Sorano, and the girls crouching beneath him.
The combined kinetic force of the entire strike team instantly shoved the girls directly into the wooden door.
CRASH!
The guild doors violently burst open, and the entire Earth Land strike team spilled into the Edolas guildhall in a tangled, chaotic pile of limbs.
"I literally told you two not to move!" Noah growled. He planted his hands and feet on the floor, violently bucking his body and launching Laxus, Natsu, Gajeel, and Gray off his back and onto the floor behind him.
"It was his fault!" Natsu and Gray instantly pointed at each other, screaming in unison. A second later, they were actively rolling around on the floor, trying to strangle each other.
"Is everyone okay?" Ultear groaned, pushing herself off the floor and helping Lucy, Wendy, and the others up.
"I'm fine," Meredy laughed, dusting off her skirt. Wendy and Yukino nodded in agreement.
"You guys are so incredibly heavy..." Happy groaned miserably from the very bottom of the pile, desperately trying to crawl out. Carla, thanks to her precognition, had perfectly predicted the collapse and gracefully sidestepped the disaster, leaving Happy to bear the brunt of the weight.
"What did you just say?" Ultear asked, turning to glare at the blue cat with absolutely terrifying, dead eyes. The rest of the women turned to glare at him with identical, murderous expressions.
"Aye!" Happy squeaked, instantly saluting and pretending he hadn't said anything.
"Hey! Who the hell are you people?! What are you doing sneaking around outside our guild?!"
A highly familiar, incredibly fierce voice echoed through the hall.
The entire Earth Land team instantly froze and looked up. The massive commotion of the door bursting open had obviously alerted the entire Edolas guild, and the members had quickly surrounded them.
Standing at the absolute front of the pack, glaring down at them with her hands on her hips, was a very familiar face.
The team instantly whipped their heads to look at Earth Land Lucy.
"Me?!" Lucy squeaked, staring in utter shock at the blonde woman standing before them.
Edolas Lucy had the exact same face, but she was wearing a tight, incredibly aggressive black leather biker outfit. She radiated an aura of pure, dominant, delinquent energy.
"Lucy?!"
"Big Sis?!" Natsu and Happy yelled in shock, pausing their brawl to stare at Edolas Lucy.
Hearing her name, Edolas Lucy locked eyes with Natsu. She marched right up to him, leaning in close as she scrutinized his face.
"Wait a minute... you're Natsu, aren't you?!" Edolas Lucy's fierce expression instantly melted into one of pure, overwhelming joy, and she violently threw her arms around him in a bone-crushing hug.
"Gah!" Natsu choked, the air forcefully driven from his lungs by her aggressive grip.
"He's Natsu?!"
"Then who the hell are the rest of these people?" The Edolas guild members began murmuring in confusion.
"Where the hell have you been?! I was so worried about you...!" Edolas Lucy practically sobbed, hugging Natsu tighter.
"W-W-Wah?!" Earth Land Lucy shrieked, her face turning as red as a tomato at the sight of her alternate self passionately hugging Natsu. She immediately took a step forward to intervene, only to freeze as the heartwarming reunion took a violently unexpected turn.
Edolas Lucy suddenly leaped into the air, landing perfectly on Natsu's shoulders. She locked her legs violently around his neck in a brutal chokehold, balled her fists, and began aggressively grinding her knuckles directly into Natsu's temples.
"EXECUTION!" Edolas Lucy roared.
"GYAHH!" Natsu screamed in agony, desperately grabbing at Edolas Lucy's legs to try and pry her off.
"It's back! Lucy's 48 Techniques of Torture: Number 12—The Drilling Knuckle!" The Edolas guild members erupted into wild, ecstatic cheers, completely hyping up the brutal assault.
"Techniques of Torture?!"
"Lucy?!"
The entire Earth Land team slowly turned their heads to stare at Earth Land Lucy in absolute horror.
"It's not me! I swear to god, I don't know any torture techniques!" Earth Land Lucy frantically waved her hands, defending her innocence.
"You're bullying him too much... poor guy..." Edolas Cana whispered softly from her table, looking deeply sympathetic.
"Waah..." Edolas Elfman was still crying in the background.
"How long are you going to keep crying, you baby?!" Edolas Jet and Droy yelled at him.
"Well, regardless, I'm just glad you're safe, Natsu! Right, Juvia-chan?!" Edolas Gray cheered, giving Natsu a thumbs-up before immediately turning back to aggressively simp for Edolas Juvia.
"You are so annoying!" Edolas Juvia shrieked in disgust.
"Wow... they really are completely different from us," Laxus muttered, watching the absolute chaos unfold with a raised eyebrow.
"It's like their entire personalities were perfectly inverted," Cana noted in disbelief.
"But still... looking at all this chaos, it really does feel like we're standing right in the middle of our own guild, doesn't it?" Noah laughed fondly.
The rest of the Earth Land team looked around and smiled, nodding in agreement. Even though the personalities were completely flipped, the overall vibe—the chaotic, loud, over-the-top energy—was exactly the same. Standing in this bizarre, bizarro-world guildhall actually felt incredibly nostalgic and welcoming.
"Let go of him right now! That is absolutely not the Natsu you know!" Earth Land Lucy finally snapped out of her stupor. She sprinted forward, violently pulling Edolas Lucy off of Natsu's shoulders.
"Another Lucy?!"
"What the hell is going on here?!"
Seeing Earth Land Lucy standing face-to-face with Edolas Lucy, the Edolas guild members gasped in sheer shock.
They frantically compared the two women. Aside from their vastly different clothing styles, they were physically identical down to the last detail, and their voices were a perfect match. However, their auras were entirely different. The leather-clad Edolas Lucy was wild, aggressive, and radiated the terrifying energy of a delinquent gang leader. Earth Land Lucy, on the other hand, was much softer, significantly more polite, and gave off the bright, energetic vibe of a classic magical girl.
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