Enid was waiting for her sixth birthday with great joy and energetic annoyance to everyone around.
Her eldest brother recently turned twelve, and on his birthday they went to the Muir Woods, to the usual camp of the San Francisco Pack, to celebrate with the whole pack and be closer to nature so that the young werewolf turned. At that time, Enid did not know all the details, but she really enjoyed spending time with the other children, that's why she asked her mother, Esther for the repeat.
She, surprisingly, agreed.
Years later, Enid realized what caused her consent.
Austin Sinclair, the oldest brother, didn't turn at twelve, but Esther Sinclair read all the necessary brochures to speed up the turning process and decided to follow one of the tips.
A young werewolf needs diverse interaction with peers and elders, and due to the fact that Austin did not turn until the age of twelve, she decided to add such interaction with the help of a rather conflictual gathering of the whole pack. And it seemed conflict-based even when it was without the participation of teenagers and children.
And what if not a bunch of hormonal teenagers, children with propellers in their asses and a general lack of a criticism filter against each other, could provoke a boy to turn?
Austin turned right in the middle of a werewolf croud, right during a scuffle with one of the teenagers who had already turned. And who decided make fun of and even suggested that Austin is a late bloomer.
Austin turned and became the first pack alpha in his generation.
All attention turned to the boy, congratulations poured out like cornucopia of sorts. And obviously, everyone forgot about little Enid, even the rest of the brothers. It was new for them, as well as for Enid herself, but she was always quite emotional and sensitive.
Mom often pursed her lips and noted with a dismissive snort that these were the traits of the future omega of the pack. Murray, the father, always shrugged his shoulders at this and seemed to be showing that there was nothing terrible about it, even if you were the omega of the pack, but preferred to keep quiet.
Enid didn't want to be the omega of the pack even when she didn't quite understand what it was.
The understanding that being the pack omega is not the worst thing, came with time.
She remembered later that she had run away from the jubilant loud gathering, depressed and splashing emotions, all in tears because everyone had forgotten about her, and she hadn't even received her promised cake, nor had she received any gifts. These moments, small and even stupid, have not been forgotten for a very long time, although they have lost their sharpness, of course.
Enid turned ten minutes later than her eldest brother.
A couple of hours later, she was found by Owen Sinclair, a distant relative and former member of the pack, a lone wolf that Enid had never heard of before his introduction and attempts to calm her down. If it hadn't been for her heightened senses and certain traits that could only be discovered by a werewolf who turned, she would never have believed his story.
After all, when Enid was six years old, no one thought of scaring her that she would become a lone wolf and leave the pack if she didn't turn. The maximum of her fears was, as already mentioned, to become the omega of the pack, a kind of fool to be ordered around, as she understood it. Even for such a straightforward and assertive woman as Esther, it turns out there were limits to what was reasonable or not.
Enid didn't know at that time that you could be kicked out of the pack simply because, in theory, for biological reasons of your turning, you could challenge the right to the power of the pack alpha. And if you do not transfer power over yourself, do not obey, want to remain equal, then this "could be kicked out" turns into "definitely kicked out and deprived of your last name."
Such utter betrayal was new to Enid.
Owen asked to be called uncle and was surprisingly helpful when the girl turned into a human form and whimpered softly from the pain of the first turn, feeling every blade of grass and pebble on her heated and overly sensitive body. After she recovered a little, he told her the whole thing.
As soon as her head cleared a little, Enid started asking questions. Why he told her all this was the first question.
Owen grinned, without malice but also without joy, smoothed Enid's disheveled hair, adjusted the blanket she was covered with, and lifted her by the armpits to the level of the side mirror of his pickup truck.
The scarlet sparks still lingered in her eyes.
Enid felt overwhelmed with emotions again, tears rolled up to her throat, and soreness in bones, joints and muscles added reasons to burst into wailing, but the man gently shook her, put her on the ground and looked into her eyes.
His pupils lit up with the same scarlet sparks as hers, but it was clear that he was letting them glow, and they were not doing it themselves without his knowledge.
This made little Enid hold her breath and stretch out her palm in an attempt to find support in the older werewolf. Her emotions were still getting the upper hand.
Owen gave her his palm and in a gentle tone began to explain to her the way to control these sparks. And the transformation. And her emotions.
Three hours flew by unnoticed, as if in a fog.
It was only later, years later, that Enid realized it was the alpha's power. That's how he gave her some of his knowledge so that she could hide her turning from her mother, father and brothers. They were insanely happy because of the presence of the next pack alpha in the family. That's how Owen made her not be gullible and childishly prattle everything to the family on the same day, as it would be logical for a child who still believed his parents, even though offended. That's how she, under the pretence of interest in the new status of her elder brother, asked all the adults available for conversation about what would happen if another alpha of the pack suddenly appeared. That's how she managed to ask her brother to show her the half-turn of the eyes.
That's how Enid realized that Owen Sinclair wasn't lying to her.
Enid didn't know how exactly, but Owen always found out when the pack was gathering where he could intercept his protégé. Her parents let Enid go into the woods, hoping that there would be no issues with her, just as there were no problems with the other brothers, Brandon, Colin and Dylan. Each of the brothers, except Austin, were beta wolves. And all of them wolfed out before their twelfth birthday.
The same was expected of her.
Every full moon of the previous six years, she got out of her house to be closer to the moon, but did not give free rein to transformation - this was Owen's knowledge, developed over decades. Every full moon without Owen, she did not allow herself to turn, so that she would not be kicked out of the family - the laws of the pack have not changed since Owen's banishment. She was sure - she checked. Even though emotions still took over sometimes and she wanted to loosen her control over the wolf and stop torturing herself.
On the night of her twelfth birthday, when she was left fully alone in the forest, as it traditionally happened to everyone before her, Owen offered his support and help, said that even if she would be kicked out, she would have a place in his family. He was not as lonely as the stories of other relatives about lone wolves painted it. He had a wife, the witch of one of the psychic clans, it seemed. As Enid understood from his meager explanations. And he sincerely claimed that there was simply no difference between the Mates of werewolves and how he felt about the witch. Enid had doubts, not about his love for the witch - it was not for her to talk about matters of heart, she could not have an opinion on this, and she accepted Uncle Owen's version without much resistance.
Enid was doubtful about their ability to provide for another growing and demanding werewolf - as Enid understood from his stories, Owen had his own twins much younger than Enid herself, who had yet to turn for the first time. And he didn't say much about the identity of his wife. All this together has become decisive for determining future actions, to some extent.
Enid couldn't risk her future like that.
Enid was persistent and stubborn, as alphas should be, which Uncle Owen noticed with a grin when she made her decision and informed him. And there was no taking that away from her.
That is why her decision to continue pretending was not revoked even when she realized the depth of contempt and neglect from her mother and even brothers that this decision brought.
Enid preferred to endure, realizing that it was still better than completely losing the opportunity to finish school and make friends with other outcasts, to find herself for hell's sake!
Enid was jealous of her brothers when they were sent to Nevermore, and she definitely didn't want to say goodbye to such an opportunity without even trying.
Her position in the San Francisco Pack didn't mean that things would be the same in Nevermore. There, her wolfing-out situation won't be as important, and she will be able to surround herself with outcasts of various species and characters.
Enid understood that this was a postponement of the inevitable, yes. But during all this time of bullying, teasing and outright pressure that piled on her, she changed her mind about wanting to be in the pack. Fundamentally changed.
Enid cooled down to any attempts by relatives to urge her to respect the Sinclair leagcy, controlled any attempts by the inner wolf to get out and show primacy, which led to control over emotional outbursts that could lead to the wolf breaking out.
By fifteen, Enid knew all her weaknesses and triggers, felt when it was better to close her eyes and when the inner wolf began to feel and act for her.
Enid gave herself free rein only in this small, if compared with what could have been, of course, uprising in the form of bright colors in clothes and decor - it was not wolfish in the slightest and irritated both narrow-minded brothers and mother as much as possible.
After the domestic torment of trying not to give herself away, her new room in Nevermore was simply paradise. Without a roommate and without any obligation to visit the local containment cells - after all, Enid was not officially capable of turning. Within the room, Enid could even turn at the full moon and curl up on the bedsheets. The mentoring of another alpha, and such a detailed one, which began with that very "unsuccessful" twelfth birthday, aside for those few hours in early childhood, helped a lot with such antics.
By the time she entered Nevermore, Enid was convinced that she did not need such a pack as it was. That's why every quarrel with her mother over her non-turning was not something traumatic or deserving of special attention.
Enid knew her own worth.
And she knew that there's always a price.
***
If anyone thought to ask Enid Sinclair what exactly was the most important turning point in her life, she would have answered something like "Nevermore admission."
And then she would smile brightly so that what she said seemed truthful.
No one asked Enid such questions, so the honest answer would be something like this. The most important day in her life happened when she turned six, and her eldest brother turned for the first time.
That day Enid got lost in the woods and lost her rose-tinted glasses forever.