The splashing sounds of the shower echoed from the bathroom, accompanied by Su Xiaolan's off-key but clearly cheerful humming. It was like a cascade of skipping notes, piercing the stagnant air of the living room. Li Chenyuan stood frozen, his perpetually icy expression showing rare cracks—a mixture of humiliated anger at being mocked, utter defeat at failing his mission (making breakfast), and a complex, misplaced resentment towards that grinning yellow rubber duck?
He looked down at the plate on the coffee table, the "breakfast of biochemical warfare" still emitting its stubborn, burnt stench. Then he looked at the fresh oil and soy sauce "medals" adorning his shirt. An overwhelming urge to destroy the evidence surged through him. He picked up the plate as if handling hazardous material and strode purposefully towards the kitchen, ready to consign this disgrace straight into the trash bin!
Just as his fingers were about to touch the lid—
"Beep—"
"Morning wellness broadcast activated."
"Indoor air quality: Excellent. PM2.5 index: 12."
"Kitchen area monitoring: Detected high concentration of burnt particulate matter and volatile oxidized oil byproducts. Air quality: Severely Polluted! Hazard level: High!"
"Urgent recommendation: Open windows immediately for ventilation! And avoid the pollution source!"
"Repeat: Open windows immediately! Avoid the pollution source!"
That damned Smart Door—the one Li Chenyuan had supposedly muted—was blaring through the living room! Its voice was clearer, more perfectly enunciated, and dripping with a stern, "concerned-for-your-health" mechanical tone than last night. The volume was clearly more than doubled! Where was the "mute" function now?!
Li Chenyuan's hand holding the plate jerked violently! He nearly dumped the "biohazard" onto his expensive suit pants! He whirled around, his deep eyes locking onto the Smart Door by the entrance with a gaze so cold it could instantly freeze the lock solid three feet deep! A vein pulsed fiercely at his temple.
Was this stupid door… getting revenge?!
The shower sounds abruptly stopped. Seconds later, the bathroom door cracked open. Su Xiaolan, her hair dripping wet, poked out half her face, flushed crimson from suppressed laughter. Her bright, sparkling eyes darted between the kitchen direction and the "righteously indignant" Smart Door.
"Pfft… cough! Cough!" She quickly covered her mouth, but her shoulders shook uncontrollably! Avoid the pollution source?! Smart Door! You truly are Li Chenyuan's nemesis! What a beautifully executed revenge!
Li Chenyuan's face wasn't just dark anymore; it was the leaden grey before a storm. He slammed the plate down onto the countertop with a loud clang! Radiating murderous intent, he covered the distance to the Smart Door in a few strides! His finger jabbed at the interior touchscreen with destructive force!
"TURN. OFF. ALL. BROADCASTS!" He ground out the command through clenched teeth, each word dripping with frost.
The screen lit up, menus flickering rapidly. Li Chenyuan's finger became a blur as he stabbed violently at the option for "COMPLETELY DISABLE VOICE SYSTEM!" His movements were fast and brutal, as if poking out the eyes of his father's murderer!
"Voice… system…" The Smart Door's mechanical voice seemed to stutter, carrying a hint of "death throes." "…is… dis… abled…"
The voice finally vanished completely.
Li Chenyuan retracted his finger, the force of his jabs still lingering on his fingertip. He shot a final icy glance at the door that had stripped him of face and dignity, looking at it as if it were a cold corpse.
However, before he could turn back to deal with the actual "pollution source," the bathroom door opened fully.
Su Xiaolan emerged, changed into comfortable loungewear, her hair wrapped in a towel. Her face was flushed pink from the steam, her large eyes watery from stifled laughter. In her hands, she held… a pink apron? Emblazoned with a huge, cartoonish yellow duckling?
She walked up to Li Chenyuan, her face breaking into an expression of utter innocence and sweetness, yet brimming with unmistakable, teasing "concern." She offered him the overwhelmingly girly, pink ducky apron:
"President Li," her voice was as clear as morning dew, laced with undisguised amusement, "Kitchen fumes are harsh, bad for the skin. Wear this, protect your… uh… priceless 'battle attire'?" Her gaze meaningfully swept over the oily "medals" on his shirt.
Li Chenyuan: "..."
He looked down at the blindingly pink, ridiculously grinning duck apron thrust before him. He looked back up, meeting Su Xiaolan's sparkling eyes, filled with mischievous glee and screaming "Put it on! Put it on! I want to see!"
A powerful premonition—the kind known as social annihilation—engulfed him!
Wear it? Stand in the kitchen draped in this? Then the name "Li Chenyuan" might as well be written backwards from now on!
Not wear it? Continue standing there in his grease-stained shirt, labeled the "Polluter-in-Chief," subject to the ridicule of that lazy fish?!
The air seemed to solidify. Li Chenyuan's face cycled through a kaleidoscope of expressions: leaden grey, flushed crimson, then settling into a near-suicidal ashen despair. He stared at Su Xiaolan's face, grinning like a cat that got the cream, then at his own disheveled shirt, and finally back at the damnable pink apron…
This lazy fish! She was absolutely doing this on purpose!
Just as Su Xiaolan thought he would throw the apron away in a fit of rage, Li Chenyuan did something that nearly made her eyes pop out!
He snatched the pink duck apron from her hand! The movement carried the desperate finality of cutting off one's hand to save the arm! Then, without even looking at it, he yanked the soft, fluffy (the apron edges had fake duck-down trim) pink fabric over his head with lightning speed!
A rustle of fabric later—
There stood the tall, imposing, intimidating CEO of the Li Group, looking stiff as a board in the pale morning light of the living room, squeezed into an incredibly childish, pink-and-yellow duck apron!
The pink straps tied in a… slightly clumsy bow? at his broad back. The huge, cartoonish yellow duckling, grinning stupidly, was plastered right across his solid chest. Its goofy smile and his tightly clenched, glacial expression created a contrast of apocalyptic proportions!
Su Xiaolan: "..."
Her mouth hung open for a full five seconds! Then, a tsunami of laughter, impossible to contain any longer, erupted like a volcano!
"Pffft HAHAHAHA—!!!" She doubled over, tears streaming, her finger trembling as she pointed at Li Chenyuan. "Pr… President Li! You… you wearing that… hahaha… it's… it's too perfect! The ducky… and you… a match made in heaven! HAHAHA…"
Li Chenyuan's face was beyond ugly; it was a riot of colors beneath a layer of black fury. His thin lips were pressed into a tight line, his jaw clenched to the point of fracture, his ears burning crimson. His deep eyes churned with a complex mix of mortification, murderous rage, and the desperate desire to vanish into thin air! His entire body was rigid as stone, radiating an aura of utter desolation from his fingertips.
This was, without doubt, the greatest stain on his life! Bar none!
Just as Su Xiaolan was laughing herself breathless and Li Chenyuan was burning with enough embarrassment to spontaneously combust—
"Ding-dong! Ding-dong! Ding-dong!"
A series of sharp, urgent doorbell chimes rang out like the clarion call of salvation! Shattering the suffocating, pink-tinged scene of social death!
Li Chenyuan reacted as if hearing heavenly music. He spun around instantly, radiating a "finally freed" murderous aura (and wearing the ridiculous apron), and stormed towards the entryway! He desperately needed an outsider to divert this godforsaken awkwardness! Even if it was the water bill collector!
He didn't even glance through the peephole. With an aura of "whoever you are, come in and face my wrath," he yanked open the brand-new, freshly "avenged" security door!
Outside.
Secretary Wang Jing stood with her usual professional sternness, though unable to completely mask her underlying anxiety. Behind her were two technicians in "Golden Shield Security" uniforms, carrying toolboxes. She was clearly here to confirm the lock repair and handle the "post-disaster reconstruction" (like clearing the door frame debris).
However, as the security door swung wide open, Wang Jing's face—accustomed to the tempests of the business world and famously unflappable—registered an unprecedented, nuclear-grade expression of shock!
What was she seeing?!
Her superior—the man with an aura ten feet tall, whose gaze could freeze a polar bear, whose signature could make the stock market tremble—CEO Li Chenyuan…
Wearing a blindingly pink apron… emblazoned with a huge, stupidly grinning yellow duckling?!
And the apron looked slightly tight on his tall frame?! With a crooked, clumsy bow tied at the back?!
Wang Jing's eyes instantly bulged wide! Her mouth fell open, large enough to fit an egg! The two security technicians behind her turned to stone on the spot, their toolboxes crashing to the ground with a clang! Their jaws practically hit the floor!
The silence was deathly.
Only the faint, lingering sound of Su Xiaolan's uncontrollable, silver-bell-like laughter drifted out from the living room…
Li Chenyuan stood in the doorway, clad in the pink duck apron, enduring the three pairs of eyes outside, shining like searchlights—filled with shock, disbelief, utter confusion, and the distinct sense of "this must be a nightmare"…
Time froze completely at that moment.
Li Chenyuan's handsome, icy face visibly cycled through colors: from crimson, to iron grey, to a pallid, lifeless ashen hue… finally settling into a… utterly shattered, utterly desolate blankness.
He felt the last shred of dignity belonging to "Li Chenyuan" crumble to dust beneath Wang Jing's horrified stare, along with this damned pink apron!
Ding—!
(A system prompt echoed in his mind: Li Chenyuan Character Collapse Level: 100%!)
Public Humiliation (Live Execution Edition), Achieved!