I was never living this down.
Every hallway I turned, I felt the weight of Future Mrs. Elias Moreno following me like a ghost with lip gloss. Jay had clung to me like I was a limited edition Gucci bag, and now I had to deal with Ermelinda's nonstop jokes.
She wouldn't stop grinning. That smug, evil little smirk she wore every time she looked at me — it was like she'd been gifted the world's greatest meme and I was the punchline.
We were walking down the stairs after class, and I could feel her side-eye burning through me.
"So..." she started, way too casual.
I sighed. "Don't."
"Just curious," she said, "Did you guys set a wedding date yet? Or is Jay still picking out the roses?"
I stopped walking, exhaled hard, and gave her a dry look. "She's my cousin."
She blinked. "What?"
"Jay. Cousin. My uncle's daughter. She's visiting from Barcelona. I had no idea she was gonna announce a marriage plan in the middle of the hallway."
Ermelinda stared at me in silence for a full second, then burst out laughing. "Oh my god, that makes it even funnier."
"I'm glad my suffering is your entertainment."
She grinned. "It really is."
I rolled my eyes. "Fine. You know what? I'll marry you instead."
That wiped the smirk off her face for about half a second.
Then she scoffed. "Not even if every guy in the world dies."
I gasped — loudly — and slapped a hand over my chest like I'd just been shot. "Oww. That hurt."
She just kept walking. "You'll live."
"I won't," I called after her dramatically, dragging my feet behind her. "I've been emotionally wounded. Crushed. Betrayed."
She didn't even turn around. "Cry me a river, Moreno."
"I will. And then drown in it."
Even as I joked, I caught the quick flash of a smile tugging at her lips. Genuine. Bright. She was laughing again — teasing me, yeah, always — but that laugh?
It made all the fake heartbreak worth it.