As the city's largest library it had a very well put together sorting system. Aisles were labeled with codes, words, and colors for people to find the book they wanted. Or they could speak with the employees and get assistance with the technology and the online system. Since the weather was poor, a lot of people took their free day to head to the library. There was no desire to play outside but to stay indoors where it was dry.
Sage knew right where he wanted to go. He reached for a book and pulled it down, and Rowan took a seat at an empty table near the shelves Sage picked from. It was a heavily populated library, but it was also the biggest library and had plenty of seating.
"Break or not, you still read about medicine."
"Because," Sage began, not looking at Rowan. His focus was on the pages as he began to flip through. "Medicine isn't only my job, it's my passion too." He peeked up, noticing Rowan staring off someplace else, a weird scrunch to his face. But the latter seemed to feel his stare and looked over. Sage ignored the strange behavior and asked, "What do you read, if you can?"
"Like, if I have time to read?"
"No, like, if your dumb brain can read a book without pictures," Sage deadpanned.
Rowan frowned, but from Sage's small smile, he knew the doctor was only joking with him. He flipped his frown and answered, "I'm a kid at heart, Sage. You know that."
"You're a grown ass man," Sage grumbled.
Rowan ignored him. "I read non-fiction," he answered.
"Like, witches and wizards?" Sage teased.
"And vampires and dragons," Rowan added with a grin. Sage scoffed and shook his head, laughing quietly under his breath. If they weren't in a library, maybe he would have let it out. Maybe. Either way Rowan would have been listening carefully to not miss it.
"In more seriousness," Rowan began to add. He leaned back in his chair and looked around, scanning the shelves that were nearly as high as the tall ceiling. His arms were folded over his chest, palms holding his elbows. "I've always been interested in learning more on old category systems to see how they handled it back then and comparing the pros and cons of modern technology."
"Nerd."
Rowan turned his head at him and squinted, but then he scoffed a quiet laugh and gently shook his head. At least he smiled.
"Your hand really feels better?" Sage suddenly asked.
"Better thanks to the doctor," Rowan answered. His eyes jumped behind Sage again for a moment. Sage turned and looked over his shoulder behind him, but he could see nothing out of the ordinary. People walked by, scanned shelves, and spoke in quiet whispers. But nothing was inherently strange. He raised an eyebrow and turned to look back, finally ready to ask Rowan about his strange behavior.
When he turned, Rowan was suddenly right there leaning in front of his face. Sage's breath caught in his throat, and he froze as Rowan lowered himself down to Sage's height. He grabbed the book from Sage's weak hands and raised it, covering their faces. He moved close. So incredibly close.
"Close your eyes."
Sage felt nervous. His whole body was ice cold. He closed his eyes. Though he had no idea what Rowan was thinking, he listened. There was a weird feeling of trust in him.
The doctor sucked in through his teeth when the other man tugged at the band in his hair and let it fall. The black hair cascaded down. One hand held the book up giving them a private shield, but Rowan's other hand pushed his fingers through the black hair. He could clearly see Sage's expression as he peeked an eye open. The doctor's eyes were closed, but his lips were parted in surprise, and then his bottom lip curled. Rowan swallowed. He prayed that Sage couldn't hear his heart beating.
For Sage, Rowan got closer. He could feel Rowan's breath hitting his open lips. That ice cold in Sage's body slowly began to melt until it began to boil, doing a complete twist in the opposite direction. Sage's head spun like an empty, hot pan on a burning stove top. Rowan was so close.
The other's body felt so much larger when he was leaning over him. His presence felt ten times bigger when Sage closed his eyes, listened to his breathing, and could feel his warmth so close to him. He could feel the uneven beating breath down on his face. Rowan was only a smidge bit taller, but he suddenly felt like he hovered over him completely.
Sage raised his hands and placed them on Rowan's chest, not pushing him away, but just keeping them there. For something to hold onto. To touch. Under his palms, Rowan's heart was beating fast. Maybe even faster than Sage's heart was.
Rowan was pretending to kiss him behind a book, letting their breaths mingle in the small space between them while being up against each other, deep breathing, eyes closed that only heightened Sage's other senses that were beginning to burn—somehow it was more intimate than actually kissing.
Sage was still in a daze when Rowan lowered the book, grabbed him by the hand, and pulled him out of the library. His feet moved by some unknown instinct to follow Rowan. He hustled down the steps, but he didn't register it. The next time he was completely aware of his own surroundings, Rowan was helping him in the car. He watched as he circled around the front of the car and got into the driver's seat. Unable to think of a word to say, Sage stared at him.
"I wouldn't kiss you without asking first," Rowan clarified, seemingly reading Sage's mind. He went quiet before he began to whisper his explanation: "The meeting I had this week—the guy was an asshole. He made comments about us, and it pissed me off." He took a deep breath and admitted, "He's why I punched the wall. He just pissed me off so badly."
"Comments about us?" Sage raised an eyebrow.
"About our marriage," Rowan said with confidence as if it was real. "That our marriage was wrong. And He was in there," he said, slanting to look at the library building. The client Rowan had met had been in the library. No wonder Rowan kept acting strangely. "I wanted to," Rowan trailed off but cleared his throat and said, "I wanted to shove our relationship in his face before we left.
"Sage," Rowan suddenly said. "Do you regret it?"
"What, being fake married to you?"
Rowan seemed to hesitate and then nodded.
"If I regretted it, I would've gotten a flight back already," Sage said honestly. He hesitated before he followed up: "Do you regret asking me?" Sage suddenly asked. "Or would it have been easier if your ex-wife came along?" If his ex-wife had come along or any other woman for that matter, Rowan would have never received the hate that had sent him off. Though Rowan's anger did not make sense to why it made him so mad, it was at least an answer as to why he had punched the wall and injured himself. There was a story finally, but there was no explanation or motive.
"Like I said, we're friends, not lovers." Rowan suddenly turned back straight in his seat, staring straight again. He looked at nothing in particular. "I'm not struggling getting over her because there's nothing to get over. I'm struggling to be alone. Being alone is going to take some time. I've known her since childhood, but if we're going to be stern on being different people, we might have to part more than I wanted to. I didn't lose my wife, I lost my best friend."
The car went quiet again.
Rowan's skin was thick. The entire time he covered their faces with a book and pretended to kiss, asking Sage what he said about how he was in bed, the idea of Sage pretending to be his husband—none of it had ever made his face flush. If anything, the tips of his ears would get a little red, but he was never too embarrassed to say anything. Now, he currently felt his cheeks become a bit hot.
"I didn't mean to rant off." Embarrassed and desperately needing to change the topic, Rowan quietly asked, "What was your question again?"
Sage didn't continue to embarrass him at all. Instead, he re-asked his question: "Do you regret asking me?"
Rowan shook his head and said, "Honestly, if I had to do-over from the start and pick someone, I would pick you again."
"It's been that fun?" Sage teased.
"Well, my ex didn't save anyone from a near death experience before."
Sage scoffed. "That was by chance."
"Still," Rowan said, his dimples reappearing into his cheeks, "it's been a lot more exciting this one time than it has been all the trips with her combined. If anything, we hung out every now and then and she attended some things with me, but she usually went off on her own to sightsee and meet up with old friends. She definitely didn't come to me telling her about the girl talk she had with other wives."
A scowl formed on Sage's face remembering the embarrassing conversation on their theoretical intimacy. "Shut up about that."
Rowan laughed. "Sorry."
"Prick. I might just schedule that trip back when we get back to the inn."
"Hey, come on," Rowan whined. And Sage stayed quiet, but he couldn't help the tug at his lips that made him smile. The doctor suddenly cleared his throat and sat up in the seat.
"What happened earlier today," Sage began to say, his voice getting quieter, "might happen again. And you might not have a book to cover it. What'll you do?"
"If it comes to kissing you? What instance do you think that'll happen in?"
"Didn't it happen just now," Sage deadpanned.
"I did that to irritate him," Rowan said. The more he thought back on it, the more he realized his actions had been a little childish. He looked down and spotted the band on his wrist from taking out Sage's hair. Silently, he handed it back to him with his head still down.
"What happens if you need to do it again, or something similar?" Sage still questioned, taking back the band from Rowan. "If people don't see us acting like a couple in public, they might spread rumors of a faulty relationship."
"Then, well, I've already given you permission to kiss me, Sage," Rowan said. "As long as you're still fine with it."
"Do what you have to do," Sage said, a weird brush of courage coursing through him. "The payment was a three-month vacation, and I pretend to be your husband. A kiss won't kill me."
"I don't want to make you uncomfortable."
"I won't be uncomfortable."
The silence in the car at that time was too difficult to cut through. Before Sage could think, he had spoken, but now that the quiet laid thick and he had a moment to think, he realized what he had implied with his words. Kissing Rowan wouldn't make him uncomfortable, but what did that mean?
Suddenly, Rowan hesitated and then asked, "Have you?"
"Have I what?"
"Have you kissed anyone before?"
"I'm thirty-four, Rowan," Sage deadpanned.
"I was just wondering."
Sage scoffed. "What, if you could be my first?"
"Kind of." Rowan suddenly grinned and added, "I was going to make sure it was really good for you."
"If we do end up having to kiss, it better be good, or I'll kick you in the groin. How about that?"
Rowan's face went pale, but slowly, he smiled again and said, "You're cute, Sage."
Sage said nothing but reached over and flicked him in the face.
On the last day of their seventh week, Rowan had a video call with Penni.
Or Sage had a video call with Penni.
"Sage-y! When are you coming back?"
From across the inn room, Rowan slipped on a shirt to sleep in and muttered, "Said as if you're best friends. This is ridiculous."
"We have about a month left," Sage answered the young girl. She frowned, pouted, and sank into her chair. It was clear that her mannerisms when she was upset were picked up from Rowan. They both resulted to sulking and pouting. "I promised you that I'll come with your papa to come meet you properly."
"Are you sure?! I'm so excited." Penni giggled. "Tell Papa not to be too sad. He should be happy because I like his friend."
Suddenly, Rowan came over into the camera. He plopped himself down onto Sage and leaned on him. "Of course, I'm happy you like him," Rowan said. "But I'm your father. You're not supposed to like him more than me."
"But… he's so nice and pretty."
"Are you saying I'm ugly?" Rowan asked sadly, deepening his frown.
"Not ugly!" Penni cried out. "But you're definitely not pretty."
"Handsome?" Rowan asked.
"Yup! My Papa is handsome! But that's not girly for me. I don't want to be handsome like Papa. I want to be pretty like mama or Sage-y."
"Hah!" Rowan backed up and pointed at Sage as if he won. "You're pretty like a girl."
"You don't seem to have a problem with it," Sage blurted out.
"Of course not. Theoretically, if we were doing stuff, you would be on the bottom."
Sage immediately picked up his phone, the nearest solid object, and chucked it at Rowan's head. The other hissed and slid off the bed, falling to the floor into a protective bubble. He swore quietly under his breath.
"Thank you, Penni," Sage said, ignoring Rowan's suffering on the floor. The other slowly made his way back to stand up, rubbing a spot on his head. Even though it had been Sage's choice of weapon, he picked up the doctor's phone and handed it back to him before he retreated to finish his nightly routine. Sage wrapped up the video call with the young girl who was sad to see him go and set the laptop aside when he was finished. He waited with his arms wrapped around his knees watching the culinary channel.
Rowan made his way to the bed, turning off the lights as he walked over. He flopped down with a dramatic sigh and frowned.
"You know, I have a headache now," he muttered.
"Maybe you should refrain from saying idiotic things."
"I don't have a headache from saying idiotic things, I have a headache from you throwing a phone at my head."
Sage passed him an innocent look of question and asked, "Who is the doctor here again? Who can legally diagnose people?"
"Funny," Rowan deadpanned. He closed his eyes to try and blink the pain away. His head truly did start to tingle a little bit. He laid like a corpse in a coffin and muttered, "It's only right for you to fix me, you know? It's your fault." He was not too serious. Only a little bit. He did not push Sage to take responsibility for Rowan's headache. However, the doctor still easily moved.
Sage dropped his legs and said, "Okay. Come here."
Surprised, Rowan opened his eyes. He turned his head over to Sage quickly to make sure he wasn't hallucinating. And he wasn't. Sage stared at him with a gentle look, his legs lying flat on the bed different from how they were a few moments ago when he had them dragged up against his chest, like he was inviting the other in. Unable to process, Rowan slowly sat up, keeping his eyes on Sage like he was afraid a blink would make him go away.
Still, Sage invited him over. He held out his hands and parted his legs a little more, dragging up to bring them close to Rowan's back to sneak behind him.
Rowan moved slowly and carefully. It was almost pitiful, like a sad dog on the street afraid someone was tempting him with a good home before they took it away as a sick joke. He almost began sweating as he shifted close to Sage. To think he was sleeping on the sofa a month ago.
The doctor had good patience. He waited for Rowan to get close enough to make a slow movement to grab his hands, and his leg inched its way behind Rowan to pull him between his legs.
"Spin around, idiot," Sage said. "How do you expect me to help?"
"I don't know what you plan on doing," Rowan muttered in response, his throat feeling a little dry. Eventually, he managed to get into position: sitting between Sage's legs, leaning back on him. Sage had enough of the comfortable, fluffy inn pillows stacked up against the headboard to be comfortable with Rowan laying in front of him. He teasingly dragged his fingers along Rowan's jaw and brought them to his temple before he gently massaged.
Rowan's tense muscles slowly began to relax under Sage's touch. He let out a deep breath, sinking further back into the doctor's chest. Sage's movements were slow and consistent, not breaking or hiccupping in the motion. As he drew his fingers in small circles, he carried his eyes up to the television screen in front of them and watched the channel playing. The other said nothing about the situation. He was scared a comment would make Sage stop, so he kept quiet. Aside from the small mumbles of pleasure that would fall his lips, he said nothing.
Underneath Sage's comfort, Rowan felt like he was drugged, as if Sage was a siren who poisoned him. He mumbled some incoherent words and raised his half-numb arms, resting his hands on Sage's knees. His thumb caressed the other's skin. Sage glanced down at him when he did, still not forgetting to move his fingers against the other's temples and noticed Rowan's eyes were still shut and looked like a sleeping puppy.
A small scoff fell from his nose, amused that Rowan was so easy. If only he had a chew toy and a box of bacon bits.
Who knew how long they were stuck in that position for. Rowan had fallen asleep, and Sage acted like he was hypnotized and stuck in motion. It was when the program ended when Sage turned his head to look at the alarm clock sitting on the hotel nightstand to read the time.
Like separating from a cute, resting dog. It almost broke Sage's heart to slip out from underneath Rowan. He moved carefully, but it was a bit difficult, and it would have saved ten times the energy if he had woken Rowan up. But still, he moved as best as he could to get Rowan off of him without disturbing his sleep.
His legs were numb from Rowan leaning on him for a while. Sage huffed quietly, holding onto the edge of the bed as he rocked on his heels to get the blood to flow back to his limbs. Soon, they were working enough to move, and Sage awkwardly walked to the bathroom to brush his teeth and wash up for the night.
He made his way back when he was finished, quietly sliding underneath the covers. As he pulled the blanket over, Rowan shifted and turned. Lying on the bed was only one blanket. They were both underneath it. Rowan's arm tiredly wiggled through and hooked around Sage's waist.
Sage let out a gentle cry of surprise, but he did not resist Rowan's tug. Instead, Rowan scooted tight against his side and pressed his forehead against Sage's arm.
It was impossible to say whether or not Rowan was moving in his sleep or pretending to be asleep to avoid confrontation of the intimate act. Regardless, Sage let it be done.