Despite the look Eve was giving me, I wasn't laughing because I had lost my mind, in fact it was the opposite. I was overjoyed at having reclaimed a massive portion of it.
"Adam, please. Talk to me." Eve's tears of concern and tone of confusion accompanied the words she spoke as she held one of my hands to her face whilst stroking mine.
"Eve. I love you more than words can say, so why would I waste them in place of taking in and savouring every moment." My words flowed so naturally she blinked as if not understanding what I said.
"Adam, I..." She started to talk before figuring out, but then it hit as she realised what I said. "Did you just?..."
"I did Eve, we certainly have to talk about a few things. I still don't feel it in my body, but I have seen the love is there so yes... Eve, with all my heart, yes... I love y-" I didn't get to finish before she kissed me.
I couldn't bring myself to tell her how I saw it, but the influx of such an intense revelation left me exhausted.
As I was out of it, the influx of knowledge had caused significant damage to my brain and rather than being thrown into my physical body I was sent to the minds-cape that was inhabited by Idir and my other self...
"I've been trying to get here for ages damn it." I gasped, the blow-back from my shifting consciousness rattling both my physical and metaphysical structures.
"You put that pain in her face!" The words came as I turned, the other me charging in against the blow-back that was clearly effecting that fragment as well.
The determination was admirable, but I had more important concerns at that time and simply stood into an uppercut that connected with enough force to lay him out in one.
"You really do enjoy beating yourself up don't you." Idir chuckled. "It seems you were a good all this time... How did they manage to detach you? Surely you have an idea."
"No... I don't think I have been a god since I arrived in this world. I do have an idea though, in the past I saw it, whilst I was standing sentinel for Ever. They mapped my emotional responses completely, then implanted something... Right about here." I said, pointing to a spot half way between the tip of my ear and my crown.
"Anyway, thanks to that... This guy was born and I got locked away. Nothing I can do about it from here, but I can at least confirm what I already know. Hold him down please." Idir was nodding along, struggling to keep up with my pace, when he put his hands on the unconscious me's shoulders I simply laughed. "Come now, do you underestimate me, it will take a monster to keep me down."
"You seem different." Idir snarled as his body returned to that of the monster.
"Of course I do, I'm a father now and you were right... That does change a man. Now.... Wakey wakey, I need me awake." I chuckled as I slapped his cheeks, making him come to aggressively.
"Stop." The word was order, one I couldn't refuse. When he did I placed my hand on him to read my pulse, then I held my eye lids apart to observe my pupil reaction
"Now. I'm going to say a few things and you are going to react silently... Halsan... Leeson... Byurik... Astrael... Quatal... Eve... Ever..."
With each name the response was definitive.
For Halsan, my pupils narrowed, ready to observe the subtleties in his political mannerism. Heart rate, steady. Byurik garnered the same response.
For Leeson, I felt my body relax, ready to have fun with my friend, to laugh, to drink, to sing... I was ashamed at how much I had undervalued his friendship.
For Astrael my eyes softened, my pulse became rythmic and I was filled with warmth of familial love and the same happened with Quatal though more intensely.
The mention of Eve brought with it a Maelstrom of physical response. Warmth spread through my cheeks, pupils dilated, breathing slowed and became heavier and my heart raced.
"Oh Adam... I think it's safe to say you love the girl." Idir said, his voice still hoarse and carrying an underlying growl.
"I do... I knew already, but I needed certainty not belief."
Then I said Eve's name and my head tilted as I read the reaction. "Quatal..." I repeated, thinking it seemed familiar.
To my surprise, it wasn't just similar, but exactly identical. 'Did I think if her as a daughter all this time?' The question came to my mind as I felt sick. 'My god... I was so cruel to her, always keeping her at arm's length and tip toeing around her out of fear for what she might do.'
I fell back, as Idir looked at me. "What is it? Eve was obvious but this Ever is a different story, I can't read these reactions as well as you."
"The response is the same as it is for my daughter..." I looked at myself on the ground. "All that time ranting about Eve and you never thought to say one thing about her. Damn you. When you are absorbed I'll make sure to discard that single-mimded cruelty, how dare you even react to her that way? To treat your daughters as an afterthought..."
Idir smiled, transforming back as the pathetic hypocrite slinked off and dispersed. "Don't hate him, think of your father, how he left your sides for your moth-"
"Don't even... He's me, he should have been how I will be and treasure them all, they are all my priority, I would never prioritise one over the others, anything that tries to make me will suffer." I smirked with the last word, the implication not lost on my own friend.
"I see.... If anyone harms your family, they will answer to a god. Good, because I fear it is such a being who means you the most harm."
I grimaced, in truth that was the most likely conclusion, but something deep down told me Sil would be the greatest threat. I didn't have time to air that thought though as I began to return to my physical form...
After my confession and that kiss, I felt the first flutterings of emotion stir within my body. Her arms around my neck, the softness of her lips, the heat of her body pressed against mine.
I felt like I was touching her for the first time and my hand ran down her side, then she made a strange squeak.
"Eek! Mmhmm, oh my... I think you are, a bit more... Go than usual. You were not exaggerating." She finally said, rambling as she pushed off of me, blushing and biting her lip.
"I guess I have to relearn restraint? I didn't feel like we were doing anything more than kissing." I laughed, then I realised what she meant and sat up. "We should go back to town..."
"You can't walk around like that!" She yelled in the mortified voice only a woman in a committed relationship can use, then her face went blank and I expected Ever to be speaking inappropriately, but Eve spoke with urgency when she came to.
"Ever needs to speak to you, now... It's urgent, she is saying good bye." The words broke my heart, all that big talk to Idir and I was losing her almost immediately. "Adam! I'm not going I just need to stay quiet, I also need to forget... I need to forget everything.
"Ever, why? What happened? I just realised what you mean to me my girl, give me a chance to make it right."
"Adam please, I need you to do this for me, do it and I swear... I swear I will give you that chance. You didn't need to feel it, I felt it, everyday you carried me with you as you fulfilled your duty. You protected and guarded me and now I know why, but I can't know, if I do then it will all end right here I can feel it." She held my face as I looked at her, completely lost. "I'm sorry, but trust me, it won't be long and you will have your chance to start over, but you need to wipe my mind clean." She was sobbing, with that memory, she clearly learned things that she shouldn't have.
"My girl, I'm sorry, I love you like a daughter. Plea..."
"Dad! Listen to me already.... This is for the best, we can start over. You can raise me properly next time, it won't be long, then you'll have your Ever nuzzling your back after nightmares and making inappropriate jokes for you to scold her for."
A small, tragic smile came to my mouth as my bottom lip shook with the first tears I'd properly felt myself shed. "Ever, I am going to be so mad if you're lying." I said through gritted teeth as I kissed her forehead.
"I'll make you mad about plenty, but not this, see you soon dad. I love you to." As she said it, she nodded and I erased my first daughter. The first person in my first life who asked if I was OK, the first person in my time as a judge to give me a reason to care about something other than duty, the first one to sacrifice anything for me.
"I just erased my daughter..." I fell, broken.
Eve caught me. "No Adam, she isn't gone, she's simply moved I can feel her still, but it's more like she is everywhere in me now, like she is trying to find herself, trying to be... Sorry, I don't know how to describe it, but trust me, she will be back and we should trust our daughter not to lie."
I gave the weak breath-y chuckle of a man trying to hide his utter defeat. "I thought you didn't want a daughter older than you."
"My love, I will gladly have any child you give me, but please try to give me at least one the usual wa-... Actually, I think I know something that will make you feel better now." She said, suddenly pulling a face.
"Eve, I don-"
"No, I know,,, What I meant was, I may have asked her advice about something... something a woman definitely shouldn't ask a girl about her father figure, of course, it wasn't really a problem back then, but after that last revelation..."
I looked at her stunned. "You asked her for advice? Then I got a... whilst you were on top of me and she was paying att..." We looked at each other, the situation wasn't exactly expected and Eve had been used to having her as a voice in her head. One with a lot of knowledge on things Eve needed advice on... Unfortunately, hindsight is twenty-twenty and the sight was horrific.
"I trust her, she will return to us one day soon. We need to make sure that when she does, we are much more parental than we have been. For now, we need to go and talk over these things you mentioned earlier."