
"I can't believe you actually said that," Mikoto grumbled, pouring tea for both herself and Kushina.
"Haha, sorry, I just couldn't help myself. That line was practically begging to be said - what else was I supposed to do?" Kushina tried to look innocent, but the glint in her eyes gave her away.
"Your 'jokes' make my fists itch," Mikoto snorted, unimpressed by her friend's excuse.
"Mikoto, darling, there's a grain of truth in every joke. You're the one who told me things cooled off between you and your husband after Sasuke was born. I just drew the most logical conclusion from Akira's words." As soon as she finished, Kushina ducked, dodging a candy Mikoto flicked at her forehead.
"My. Husband. Is. Fine." Mikoto ground out, her teeth clenched.
"Oh, everyone says that," Kushina waved her hand dismissively, as if shooing away Mikoto's irritation. "But if you think about it - there's no such thing as a man without flaws. Some are drunks, some are weak-willed, some are just plain dumb, and some… well, some aren't just into women. Or maybe not into women at all."
"Kushina, I swear, I'm about to throw this spoon at you. And stop talking nonsense - you've probably read too many novels from the Land of Tea. There are no men like that in Konoha."
"Oh, don't be so sure. Remember Hoshiru and Yakiba?" Kushina's face lit up with intrigue.
"Hmm, I think… were they in your class?" Mikoto tried to recall. They'd only overlapped at the Academy for a year, and back then, they weren't even friends - Kushina was just starting, Mikoto was about to graduate.
"Yeah, you couldn't have forgotten them. They were always fighting and bickering over nothing, sometimes loud enough for the whole Academy to hear. And you know what? I heard from Mebuki that now they're best friends - practically inseparable, always together, even on missions."
"So what? We used to fight all the time too, back when you got transferred to Tsunade-sensei's team. We were at each other's throats almost every day, and now look at us - practically sisters."
"Sure, but every case is different. Like Akira's book says, _'There's a fine line between love and hate.'_ Hoshiru was married, but a year ago, he and his wife had a huge fight and got divorced. Can you imagine?" Mikoto's eyes widened. Divorce in Konoha was rare - it stained the honor of both husband and wife.
"So they split up, big deal," Mikoto tried to see the point.
"Now here's the interesting part! After the divorce, Hoshiru moved in with Yakiba. The official story is that he left the house to his wife and, with nowhere else to go, crashed with his friend until he could save up for a place of his own. But it's been a year, and he's still living there. Get it?"
"Okay, that's a little weird. He could've at least rented a place by now, but that doesn't prove anything."
"No, but sometimes you don't need proof. To me, it's obvious. Or take Izumo and Kotetsu - they spend all day together, just the two of them, in that tiny guard booth. Their houses are next door, no wives in sight. Tell me that's not odd."
"Pfft, by your logic, Akira should be on your suspect list too. He doesn't have a girlfriend or a wife," Mikoto smirked.
_Honestly, that bastard could be anything but gay,_ she thought, remembering a recent incident.
"No, a woman's intuition never lies," Kushina said, raising a finger with authority. "Whenever we go for walks together, I always notice where his eyes wander. If he's not staring at the sky or at me, he's definitely checking out the ladies passing by. Or are you going to tell me you didn't notice how he was ogling us from behind on the way to the dojo?"
"Pfft." Mikoto looked away, just for a second.
"See? Exactly!" Kushina said triumphantly. "So in that department, Akira's record is squeaky clean."
"Then what are his flaws? You're the one who said there's no such thing as a perfect man, even if you rephrased it a bit," Mikoto asked, feigning disinterest.
"Well… let me think. He's handsome, smart, dresses well, educated, fit, a great cook, neat, has a good sense of humor, interesting, mysterious…"
"Hey, I asked about his flaws, not his virtues," Mikoto protested.
"I know, I know. I'm just trying to figure out what his flaws actually are. Where was I? Oh right: mysterious, creative, understanding, not rude, doesn't drink too much - at least, he's only come home drunk once."
"And how would you know?" Mikoto asked, surprised.
"My whole house is basically one big fuin. I always know when he comes home. And since he never stays out past 8 p.m., it's not hard to figure out where he's been if he comes back late. And if I want to double-check, I just listen to how he walks."
"You're starting to scare me," Mikoto joked.
"Hey! He's my neighbor and friend, and he gets along great with my daughter. I have to make sure he doesn't have any bad habits."
"Ara-ara, 'friend,' sure. Go on, keep singing his praises, don't mind me."
"Pfft." Kushina snorted, blushing a little.
"Nope, pfft-ing is a privilege of my clan. Find your own thing," Mikoto said, unable to hold back her laughter.
"All right, so to sum up, his flaw is that he doesn't have any flaws," Kushina concluded, looking very pleased with herself.
"That sounds like nonsense," Mikoto said, unimpressed.
"No, it makes sense. Because he doesn't have any flaws, he attracts way too much female attention. That's a lot of competition, and it could last until he's old and gray. That's his flaw."
"So basically, high risk of cheating," Mikoto decided.
"Well… I don't know, I don't think he's that kind of guy," Kushina said, suddenly a bit downcast.
"Ah, Kushina, I'm no genjutsu master, but even I can see you're living in a fantasy. Do you really think a guy half your age is going to settle down with a single mom? Don't get me wrong, you're a wonderful woman and would make a perfect wife. I'm sure there are plenty of men who'd be happy to be with you."
"But?" Kushina asked, not hiding her annoyance.
"But… in our world, it's just not done. A man doesn't usually tie his life to a woman several years older than him. Even if you were ten years younger, you'd still be twenty-eight, and as far as I remember, he's eighteen."
"Yeah, you're right," Kushina sighed, her voice heavy.
_Kushina, this guy isn't for you. Sorry to say it like this, but let him just stay your friend,_ Mikoto thought.
Just then, the sound of a shoji door sliding open interrupted them.
"Welcome back," Mikoto said with a smile, standing up to greet her husband. Kushina followed suit, as etiquette demanded.
"Kushina-san, it's good to see you. How have you been?" Fugaku asked, heading to the sink to pour himself a glass of water. Mikoto was about to help, but he shook his head, signaling he could handle it.
"I'm great. I see you're as busy as ever," she replied.
"Want a snack? I'll put the kettle on," Mikoto offered, reaching for the teapot, but Fugaku stopped her.
"No need. I just came home to change. I need to call an urgent clan meeting. Don't wait for me at dinner - I'll be late." He finished his water, set the glass in the sink, and turned to leave.
"Did something happen?" Mikoto asked, worried.
Fugaku frowned and glanced at Kushina. After a few seconds, he said, "I had a talk with Akira-san, and the conversation turned to what's been happening in the clan. He's an impressive person," a brief smile flickered across his face. "I only mentioned that there's been growing unrest in the clan because of some minor scuffles with villagers over the past two weeks, and he immediately suggested it might be staged incidents and deliberate provocations."
"But why would anyone do that? And who's behind it?" Mikoto asked, surprised.
"I'm not sure. Maybe the Hyuga, but as much as our clans dislike each other, none of us would stoop to such methods. Or maybe it's Danzo - he's had it in for us for a long time, but I can't figure out what he's after. In two weeks, there'll be a clan meeting, and if our suspicions are confirmed, I'll bring it up then. Kushina-san, you've found yourself a wonderful friend." With a nod, Fugaku went off to change and soon left the house in his kimono.
"Kushina-san, you've found yourself a wonderful friend," Kushina mimicked, shaking her head with a grin. "And did you see his face light up when he talked about how amazing Akira is? Mikoto, you should start getting worried."
A moment later, Kushina, with a sly smile, quickly raised her spoon to deflect a flying object. With a clang, the two spoons collided, and one fell to the floor.
"Deep breath, Mikoto-chan, deep breath," Kushina laughed, picking up the spoon and putting it back on the table. After a few more playful exchanges, Kushina's face turned serious.
"So, what's going on in your clan?" For the next ten minutes, Mikoto told her about the harassment cases, threatening letters to the police, and fights.
"I see. Then Akira's theory makes sense. By the way, show me the portrait," she said, changing the subject.
Once in the bedroom, Kushina oohed and aahed over Mikoto's painting, sharing her impressions.
"It's a really emotional piece. Mmm… Mikoto, remind me, when was the last time Fugaku gave you anything?" Kushina asked, her face the picture of innocence.
Mikoto, holding the portrait in one hand and a storage scroll in the other, didn't have to think long about what to throw at her friend.
****
I hope my tip helps them, even a little. As long as the Uchiha are alive, Danzo won't bother with me. He's the last person in the village I want to deal with right now.
As for the renovations on the second house… I think I'll hold off for a bit. My two-bedroom apartment is just fine for now.
Feeling my stomach rumble, I veered off my route home and headed north along the main street, planning to cut over to the northeast district.
On the way to the intersection, I glanced at the museum, where renovations were crawling along.
They're taking their sweet time. Saving on labor, maybe? Well, at least they haven't abandoned the project.
With a full stomach, my brain finally started working properly, and I remembered I wanted to check on the details of the approved fund. So I headed to the administration building to see Homura.
To my surprise, aside from the fund's account operations being public, there were no other controls set up for my activities.
Are they really that short-staffed? They could've at least assigned someone for appearances' sake. Even with transparent transactions, it wouldn't be hard for me to siphon off the money for personal use. The councilors have shown me plenty of ways to do it.
The fund's balance was 7.8 million ryo. I even counted the digits with my finger to make sure I wasn't seeing things. That's a huge sum, even by my world's standards. The fund was new, the idea was new, and no one really understood how it would work. Plus, it wasn't an investment - the clans had to understand they wouldn't just get their money back.
Was it my reputation? Or did the clan heads want to boost their own standing and show off their financial muscle with these donations?
The Hyuga clan gave 888,000 ryo. The Uchiha, as if on purpose, donated twice as much. The other clans chipped in too.
Heh, what a bunch of… old cheapskates, I finished the thought in my head. The Hokage himself donated the least, on behalf of the Sarutobi clan. If you want to know who has what money, just walk through Konoha and look at the clan crests.
All the clans made money from missions. As far as I understood, the clan took a cut from its members' rewards, but that alone wasn't enough to keep a clan running - you needed more for growth.
The Nara clan made extra from selling medicine - they had five pharmacies in the village and probably worked with all the big cities in the Land of Fire. The Akimichi ran a big restaurant business. The Yamanaka didn't have a clear specialty, but they owned two flower shops, an onsen, three cafes, a weapons store, and apparently a few apartment complexes, though you couldn't be sure since they didn't put their crest on rental properties.
The other clans had similar side incomes, but honestly, these "side" incomes were probably their main ones. There were exceptions, though - the Hyuga and Uchiha clans.
The Hyuga didn't do any business, just provided medical services at the hospital or to other clans, charging sky-high rates. After Tsunade, their clan had the best medics. The Uchiha… well, I don't know if it's something to be proud of, but all their income came from missions. Judging by the wealth of their district, the Uchiha did more missions than anyone else in Konoha. Elite mercenaries, that's what they were.
So why is Hiruzen such an old cheapskate? Simple. Everyone knows the Sarutobi clan is the main player in the Keishi trading conglomerate. While a shinobi bows and reports on a mission he risked his life for, earning a couple hundred thousand ryo, the Hokage can sit back and light his pipe with tobacco that costs up to 100,000 ryo for 20 grams. And that's no joke! In this world, only the rich or the show-offs smoke.
For some reason, the local soil just doesn't like tobacco plants. Sounds crazy, but it's true! Everyone talks about how hard it is to grow tobacco. If someone lights up in a restaurant, no one kicks them out - random customers even move closer.
Health risks? Just addiction. Here, chakra keeps everyone healthy, so a couple cigarettes won't hurt you. No one smokes a pack a day, anyway. Maybe things will change if they figure out how to grow more, but for now, demand is huge and supply is low.
The next morning, I decided to look for a place to handle fund applications. Or rather, I handed that job off to Ayumi.
Once she left the office, I sprawled out in my chair and grabbed my hair.
"What the hell is going on?" I slammed my palm on the desk in frustration.
****
The morning promised to be perfect. I hadn't slept so well since I arrived in Konoha. But the moment I saw the envelope on my desk after my shower, my good mood vanished.
"Aika… was it you who put this here?" I asked the fox, who was wagging her tail and munching on meat from her bowl.
After setting up the barrier, I'd made sure it was impossible to get through - at least, with my level of power. To test it, all I had to do was remove my chakra signature from the fuin controls and try to leave the house.
The door stood wide open, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't step past the threshold. It was like a soft force field was holding me back. To break through it without some crazy technique, you'd need someone like Guy, and even then, only if he opened the gates.
"Wait! When did I fill your bowl?" Was I having memory problems? At eighteen?
I strode over to the envelope, tore it open in one motion, and pulled out the letter inside:
_Akira-san, it's me again, your number one fan! I couldn't resist and decided to read your draft - a thousand apologies. But don't worry, I didn't mess anything up. To make it up to you, I fed your pet, watered your plants, and did a full cleaning here and at your other house. By the way, you look really cute when you sleep. Also, I took your dirty laundry - I'll wash it and hang it out to dry, so don't worry._
"Aika! You couldn't have woken me up?" I asked the fox, who paused for a second, barked at me, and went back to her food.
****
How did she get through the barrier without me noticing? How did she get through at all? She doesn't have chakra? No way!
Like I didn't have enough problems already - now I've got a crazy fan to deal with! Just my luck.
The problem isn't that she comes and goes as she pleases, or even that she got through the barrier, though that's worrying too. The problem is, she's nuts! Only people with issues act like this.
And the thing about crazy people is, they're unpredictable. When I do something, I can usually guess how people will react. Everyone does it instinctively.
I can more or less predict how the Hokage or Danzo will act toward me. I can analyze and guess how the other clans will respond to my projects. I know how a drunk will react if I curse him out. But no matter how hard I try, I can't predict what a crazy person will do. Today she cleans my house and feeds Aika, and tomorrow… she might decide I'm holding my pet hostage and break in to "rescue" her - and beat me up in the process.
Damn, I need a bodyguard. The barrier won't save me. Maybe I should put out a mission for a chunin? Or just hire a jonin? But if I keep a jonin on for more than a month, it'll start eating into my finances. Maybe I should look for someone to get rid of her? That's an option, but only as a last resort - I don't even know who she is.
Ugh, Itachi, things were so much calmer with you around. You brought me tea and buns, and my nerves weren't nearly as frayed as they are now.
I wonder if she's still keeping tabs on me? Hmm, doubtful. If there was even one ANBU in Tanzaku, they'd have noticed how close we got - way too close for someone who's just supposed to be tailing me. Plus, I've been to her house. Maybe they've called off the surveillance altogether? A few days ago, I would've killed for that, but now I really hope they're still watching, and all these letters from my crazy fan are just some bored ANBU's idea of fun.
"Whew, all right, calm down." Today I'd planned to do the books, and that's not something you want to tackle when you're worked up.
By evening, I left the restaurant tired but in a good mood. McDonald's brought in 723,000 ryo this month, and the book added another 278,000 on top. If that's not a reason to celebrate, I don't know what is. In Tanzaku, after opening the restaurant and with the right advertising, I'd expected to make over 800,000 in the first month and break a million in a few months.
What do you do with big money? Invest it, of course. For the past two weeks, I'd had my eye on a little shop that was always empty. That evening, I decided to check it out, hoping it wasn't closed yet.
"Hello, are you still open?" I asked as I walked in.
"Hello, hello, of course! We're open till nine… Oh, you're the owner, Akira-san, right?" the man said, surprised.
It wasn't surprising he recognized me - he'd come to my restaurant before, trying to sell me a TV and security system. I'd recently learned he'd gone from merchant to owner of this appliance store - or at least, that's what I called it. To the locals, it was just a shop selling who-knows-what for who-knows-why.
"That's right. And you are?" I nodded, looking over the merchandise.
"Oochuki Ryusen, at your service." The portly man bowed and stepped out from behind the counter. He walked over to the shelves, and I started checking out the goods.
"This is an electric stove - with it, you won't have to worry about kids starting a fire at home. And this is a new model from the Land of Snow - an electric kettle that boils water to the perfect temperature, fast and quiet."
He started listing off the names and features of everything I looked at. The only big appliances were TVs - he must've decided to take a risk and focus on those.
"See anything you like?" he asked with a polite smile. I could see the hope in his eyes - he was dying for me to buy something.
"Do customers only come in here to buy light bulbs?" I asked, smiling calmly.
"Uh, yeah…" he admitted, slumping a little. "You're in the business too, so I won't lie - people are really reluctant to buy electric appliances."
No surprise there. Electricity here was only a little cheaper than gas, and the current appliances weren't exactly energy efficient. The fridge in my house used three times more power than the old Soviet one in my old apartment. So, to the locals, buying this stuff seemed like a bad idea, and there wasn't much to be done about it.
"Do they buy anything besides bulbs?" I asked, glancing around the shop again.
"Bulbs, irons, rarely anything else. The income barely covers taxes and rent." At first, he seemed a little too open - you'd think he'd hide that from a potential customer. But like he said, I was in the business too. All it took was a look at the customer flow and price tags to figure things out, so… what he was saying was probably common knowledge among the neighboring shop owners.
"Where do you get your TVs from?" I asked, looking at the downcast owner.
"Um, well… I'd rather not say, but… oh, whatever. I haven't sold a single TV, and I doubt anyone else will. He told me he bought them from the Keishi trading conglomerate, who got them from the Land of Snow."
"I see. So you can travel to the capital freely?" I asked, interested.
"Yeah, you wouldn't guess it, but I'm from a samurai family. I didn't get lucky with chakra, but my younger brother's a real genius - he took the oath at fifteen," he said proudly. So, he was a Keishi native.
"I see, Ryusen-san. Since you work with the conglomerate, can they act as intermediaries for business deals with other countries?"
"As far as I know, yes," he nodded several times.
"Great. Then I have a favor to ask. Could you contact someone you know at the conglomerate and ask them to give my address to a trade rep from the Land of Snow, and let them know I'm interested in investing in their tech?"
"With all due respect, Akira-san… that's a bit of a tall order," he said firmly.
"Oh? That's a shame. I was just about to buy a light bulb from you for 50,000 ryo," I said, putting on my best sad face.
"Really?" He practically jumped. "Why didn't you say so? I'll gladly sell you a bulb - I'll even give you a little discount," he said with a smile.
Rolling my eyes mentally, I pulled out my checkbook and wrote out the amount with my signature.
"One moment." He smoothly pocketed the check, walked over to the neatly arranged table, grabbed a random bulb, and brought it back.
"Here you go - and your change," he said, handing me the bulb in a small box and a 100 ryo bill.
"So, when should I expect an answer?" I asked.
"Hmm, I'd say five to eight days," he said, looking much happier.
"All right, I'll be back then." I said goodbye, left the shop, and headed for the main street. I wanted to pick up some sweets for tomorrow, to treat myself after my morning workout.
Ryusen's shop wasn't in the busiest part of town, so after I turned down an alley, I walked in silence for a few seconds.
"Akira-san." A voice I didn't recognize called from behind.
Turns out my instincts aren't bad - the moment I heard that voice, my body told me to get out of there, fast. Still, I turned to see who wanted to talk to me in a deserted alley at this hour.
"ANBU?" I asked, biting the inside of my cheek.
"Something like that," came the flat voice from behind the mask. "I've been told to inform you that you are to cease all contact with the Academy student Uzumaki Naruko and her guardian. I recommend you cooperate with us on this."
"Oh? Did something happen? Am I being accused of something?" I feigned surprise, trying to get more info.
"Don't ask unnecessary questions, and don't talk about this conversation… and one more thing, a personal tip, Akira-san: don't leave the village, and better yet, don't even leave your house." The ANBU vanished, leaving only a swirl of leaves from a shunshin.
Without showing any emotion, I made my way to the main street, bought a few buns and a chocolate cake. I'd planned to take a walk in the park on the way back, but decided to head straight home.
As I stepped through the doorway and felt the barrier wrap around me for a second, I turned and locked the door.
"Yip?" Aika asked, waiting for me near the entrance.
"Yeah, I'm home." I put the bag in the kitchen, fed Aika, and slowly made my way to the bedroom.
****
As soon as the bedroom door closed, Akira slammed his fist into the wall.
"I'll kill him," he said coldly.
There was no trace of his usual calm expression.
"So, you finally put me on your blacklist, huh, Danzo? You don't like how close I've gotten to the 'weapon' and her guardian? Or do my visits to the Uchiha clan grate on your one good eye? You think you're so damn smart!? Bastard! I actually thought you'd be a little more reasonable in this reality - guess I was wrong. Well played, Danzo, I'll give you that. This is check.
You're a seasoned shinobi, you've got a whole army of trained killers, you can arrange a death, a poisoning, or an explosion anytime you want. In that department, I'm no match for you. But you know what - you made one fatal mistake. Instead of playing games with me, you should've killed me right away, because the dead don't pose a threat.
Yeah, in your game, I'm no match for you, so we'll play by my rules - by the rules of 21st-century warfare.
🔥~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~🔥
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