"Tsk, tsk, tsk… at least now I know you care about me," Selene teased, wrapping her arms around me like nothing was wrong.
Damn it. I should've known—Selene's indestructible. Nothing can harm her.
"It was going to hit you so… cough—ugh." My chest burned. Someone please save me from this clingy menace. "You've got the wrong idea, don't overthink it," I muttered.
Selene only smiled wider, her grin practically glowing.
"Stop. Stop. Stop smiling!" I barked.
"Why, Kisaragi?" she asked sweetly, smile stretching even more. That smile—it was infectious. No, no, I won't fall for it.
"You're ugly when you smile!" I snapped.
"Eeeh?!" Selene gasped dramatically, finally dropping her grin. Then she squinted at me. "Kisaragi… you're melting."
"What?!" I looked down—and my arm was dissolving into steaming chunks. My skin sizzled. Acid.
"That's acid!" Rei shouted from behind, horror in her voice.
"Ahhh! Ahhh! Ahhh! look who got an upgrade!" boomed a guttural voice.
The queen ant.
No longer crawling on six legs—she had risen upright, standing on two like some monstrous parody of a human. Wings sprouted from her back, her golden carapace gleaming so brightly it was painful to look at.
"Oh, come on! Wings? A humanoid form? Shiny golden armor?!" I yelled. "This isn't fair—when I die, I don't get upgrades! Why would Author LeeDevil write this garbage?"
The queen only laughed, her voice dripping with power.
My body continued melting—but then, piece by piece, it regenerated. Flesh knitting, bones reforming. Rei's jaw nearly hit the floor.
"Wha—WHAT?! You're healing?! Since when?!" she cried, mouth hanging open in a dozen unasked questions.
"Don't worry, Rei. I'm not that easy to kill," I grunted, rising to my feet.
"Wow, you don't have to die for me," Selene said softly, smiling again as she hugged me tighter.
"We're in the middle of an ant crisis, Selene—STOP hugging me!" I growled, prying at her arms.
That's when the black ants unfroze. One by one, they began crawling, chittering, swarming. Their screeches tore through the chamber—except to me, they weren't just noises. They were words. I could understand them.
The workers were terrified. The queen planned to devour not just us—but them, too.
"Rei! You need to create ash!" I barked. "The queen communicates with scent—we can cloud it with ash and throw her off balance. We need it to trap her."
"Okay, but where the hell do I get ash?" Rei shot back.
"This is a forest! Burn the trees!"
Rei gawked. "So you want me to start a forest fire NOW?"
Before I could argue, the queen spread her wings, shrieking as she devoured one of her own workers mid-step. Her body pulsed, swelling—growing even bigger.
"Go, Rei!" I ordered. "If you run, the ants will chase you. You're food to the queen. Lure them out—we'll handle things here."
Rei clenched her fists, then bolted. Immediately, half the black ants screeched and split off to pursue her.
The queen cackled. "Fools! You think you can scatter my army? Nothing can stop me now—I am unstoppable!"
"Yes, she can." I shoved Selene forward.
"What the—Kisaragi! Are you trading me to the bug?!" Selene snapped.
"You struck her once with a single sword, and she vanished," I said quickly. "You're stronger than her. If she kills you, she'll become the strongest queen alive. So now—fight."
Selene glared at me. "Unbelievable. And how the hell are you even talking to that thing?"
"We need time for Rei to come back," I whispered, ignoring her complaints. "Make me a dagger with your ice—just something sharp. I'll start freeing the prisoners while you keep the queen busy."
The queen hissed, mandibles clacking like thunder. "I am the only queen! No rival may stand above me. If she is strong, I will kill her. I will eat her. I will become more powerful!"
"Well, okay then. It'll be a pleasure to kill you again," Selene said coolly, summoning a frozen blade from her hand. This one shimmered differently from the last, etched with frost that sparkled under the torchlight.
"Whoa, cool sword, Selene," I blurted, eyes wide.
"This sword," she said with a smirk, "will cut her in half and freeze her into shards." She lifted it high, ready for battle.
"No, no, no killing, Selene!" I waved frantically. "If you kill her, she'll just respawn stronger. No killing!"
Selene tilted her head, annoyed. "This goes against my virtue. I don't take orders… and yet here I am, listening to you, Kisaragi. You're the first to ever command me. But don't worry—" her lips curled in amusement "—I'll allow it. You can be the top when we get married."
I nearly choked. "THERE WON'T BE A WEDDING! Do you hear me?! Not even a marriage! Why are you flirting in the middle of life-threatening danger?!"
The Ant Queen growled, her golden armor glinting. "If she has a sword, then so shall I." Her arms twisted and reformed, each morphing into a sharp, gleaming golden blade.
My jaw dropped. "Oh my god. Sword vs. sword. Steel on steel. I'm loving this anime right now. Who's gonna win?!"
"Kisaragi!" Selene snapped, glaring at me as the Queen lunged. "Who are you even cheering for, me or that thing?!"
Before I could answer, the Queen struck first—her golden sword slamming down with terrifying force. Selene caught the blow but was thrown back, hitting the ground hard.
"Aww…" I winced. "Oof, fighting, Selene! You got this! Fighting!" I threw my fists in the air like I was watching a tournament.
The surrounding black ants clacked their mandibles, rallying for their queen like die-hard fans at a concert.
Selene shouted at me, "Seriously?! I'm trying to save your life and you're busy supporting the villain?!"
"You're just… too easy to distract!" the Ant Queen mocked, pressing her attack.
But Selene rose from the ground, brushing dust from her immaculate armor. She wasn't even scratched. Her lips curved into a dangerous smile.
"What—how?!" The Queen's voice shook. "That strike should've ended you!"
"She's immortal," I cut in, taunting. "Just like you. Only difference is, she's indestructible. Ha! Power gap much?"
"Kisaragi!" Selene yelled, blocking another strike. "Shouldn't you be doing something other than commentary?!"
"Oh right, the hostages!" I slapped my forehead.
"Selene, dagger!"
Without missing a beat, she conjured a small ice dagger in her free hand and flung it at me. I caught it and grinned. "Cool!" Then, curiosity got the better of me. I brushed the blade with my thumb. "Whoa, super sharp—ouch!" Blood welled from the cut, but I shook it off. "Okay, focus."
Looking up at the writhing nest, I realized I had no way to climb. I crouched toward one of the worker ants nearby.
"Pssst. Hey, buddy. Mind giving me a ride up there?" Silence. The ant just stared.
I tried again, whispering urgently. "Look, I get it. You hate being a worker. Help me out, and I'll free you from your queen. Deal?"
The ant's antennae twitched. It glanced between the battle below and me… then, with a strange chitter, it lowered its body.
My grin spread. "Nice! You're my Uber now."
I climbed onto its back, gripping tight as it carried me up toward the hostages. The air reeked of resin and blood as I started sawing through the sticky cocoons.
Below, Selene finally landed her first clean strike, slashing across the Queen's chest. Frost spread across the golden carapace.
I couldn't help myself—the words slipped out before I knew it. "YIPPEE! That's my baby! Fighting!"
The instant I said it, my face went pale. Oh no. Please tell me she didn't hear that—
Selene froze mid-fight. Her head whipped toward me, eyes glittering with mischief.
"…Did Kisaragi just call me baby?"