The mall was packed with holiday shoppers, twinkling lights strung from every railing and cheesy Christmas music playing over the speakers. Alex, who normally wouldn't be caught dead browsing for clothes, found herself nervously flipping through racks of dresses beside Gloria.
"I just… want something nice," Alex muttered, holding up a deep red dress before frowning and putting it back.
Gloria smirked, adjusting her designer sunglasses. "For Marco, sí?"
Alex's cheeks warmed. "Maybe."
Gloria laughed, tossing a silky emerald-green dress at her. "Try this. Men like color."
Alex held it up, skeptical. "Isn't this a little… much?"
"Ay, you think too much," Gloria said, waving her off. "You want to impress him? Wear something that makes you feel good. Confidence is sexy."
Alex sighed but draped the dress over her arm. "Fine. But I still need to figure out what to get him for Christmas."
Gloria's eyebrows shot up. "Oh? And when were you planning to introduce this boy to the rest of the family, huh? Jay, Manny, Mitch, Cameron—Lilly?"
Alex froze. "I… hadn't really thought about that."
Gloria rolled her eyes. "Of course not. You Dunphys are all the same—"
"Nah, she doesn't gotta wait for that."
A familiar voice cut through the air. Alex spun around—and there was Marco, leaning against a nearby display with a smirk, dressed in his usual hoodie and jeans but somehow still looking unfairly good.
"Marco!" Alex blinked. "What are you doing here?"
"I needed new work shoes. Saw you two from across the store." He pushed off the display and strolled over, eyes flicking to Gloria. "Who's this?"
Alex cleared her throat. "This is Gloria, my… step-grandmother."
Gloria's lip curled. "Do not call me that."
Marco grinned. "Got it. So, just Gloria?"
"Sí," Gloria said, sizing him up.
Then Marco's grin widened. "Wait… you're Latina, aren't you?"
Gloria's eyes lit up. "Colombiana, mijo."
"No mames," Marco laughed, switching effortlessly to Spanish. "¿De qué parte?"
"Barrio peligroso, cariño. Tú sabes cómo es." Gloria smirked.
"Ah, claro. Yo soy del sur de LA—puro movimiento." Marco nodded approvingly.
Alex cleared her throat loudly. "Uh. English, please?"
Marco waved her off. "Relax, mami, we're just bonding."
Gloria folded her arms, amused. "I like him."
Alex groaned. "Great."
Marco, never one to waste time, turned to Alex. "Anyway, since we're here—what do you want for Christmas?"
Alex blinked. "What?"
"I don't wanna buy you some estúpido gift you won't like," Marco said bluntly. "So just tell me."
Gloria burst out laughing. "Oh, Dios mío, I really like him."
Alex rubbed her temples. "You can't just ask me that! It's supposed to be a surprise!"
Marco shrugged. "Nah, surprises are overrated. I'd rather get you something you'll actually use."
Alex opened her mouth—then closed it. "…A first-edition copy of The Origin of Species."
Marco stared. "That's the nerdiest shit I've ever heard."
Gloria cackled.
Alex huffed. "You asked!"
Marco sighed, rubbing his face. "Fine. But I'm wrapping it in, like, Spider-Man paper or some mierda."
Gloria wiped a tear from her eye. "Oh, you have to bring him to Christmas. Jay's gonna hate him."
Alex groaned. "This is a nightmare."
Marco just grinned, throwing an arm around her shoulders. "Nah, mami. This is gonna be fun."
And as much as Alex wanted to argue—she had a feeling he was right.
———
After buying clothes (Alex refused to show Marco her purchases, much to his playful annoyance), the trio wandered through the mall. Gloria cooed over a display of fluffy bunnies in the pet store window, immediately dragging them inside.
"Oh, mira how cute they are!" Gloria pressed her hands against the glass as a tiny white bunny twitched its nose at her.
Alex, meanwhile, followed Marco as he beelined toward the reptile section.
"What are you getting?" she asked, though she already had a sinking feeling.
Marco grinned. "Live crickets and worms. Ava's running low."
Alex shuddered. "I hate that you feed her live things."
"She's a predator, mami. It's nature."
"It's disgusting."
Unfortunately, the pet store was out of live feeders. Marco grumbled, but Gloria—still distracted by the bunnies—suggested the fishing supply shop across the street.
The fishing shop smelled like bait and rubber boots. Alex wrinkled her nose as Marco cheerfully grabbed a container of live worms and a small box of crickets.
"Ava's gonna feast," he said, way too excited for someone buying bug snacks.
Alex grimaced. "Please don't say feast."
Gloria, meanwhile, was inspecting a rack of fishing hats. "Jay would hate this one," she mused, holding up a neon orange cap with "Bass Master" embroidered on it.
Marco snorted. "We gotta get it for him."
Alex rolled her eyes but couldn't help smiling.
With another half-hour to spare before Marco had to leave for work, they grabbed coffee at a nearby café. Gloria, stirring her café con leche, eyed Marco with amusement.
"So, mijo, you really take care of a tarantula?"
"Yup. Ava's my girl," Marco said proudly.
"And a raccoon?"
"Carlos is more of a freeloader than a pet."
Gloria laughed. "You're loco. I like that."
Alex sipped her latte, watching them banter. It was weird seeing Marco so effortlessly win over her family—but then again, he had a way of charming everyone when he wanted to.
Finally, Marco checked his phone and groaned. "Alright, mami, I gotta head out. Work calls." He stood, dropping a quick kiss on Alex's forehead. "Text me when you get home."
Alex nodded. "Try not to drop any wrenches on your feet."
"No promises." He winked, then turned to Gloria. "Nice meeting you, señora."
Gloria smirked. "Call me señora again and I'll break your nariz."
Marco grinned. "Noted."
And with that, he was gone—leaving Alex with a shopping bag, a half-finished coffee, and the unsettling realization that her chaotic boyfriend was somehow winning over her entire family.
———
Marco: [sent a photo]
Marco: look mami. avas having a fancy dinner. see? this one's even gift-wrapped for her 😂
The photo showed Ava crouched over a fat cricket, her fangs sunk in as it twitched helplessly. Next to her, another cricket was half-wrapped in silky white webbing, its legs still kicking futilely.
Alex: I WAS ABOUT TO GO TO SLEEP. NOW I'M GOING TO HAVE NIGHTMARES.
Marco: nahhh it's educational. look how efficient she is! nature is beautiful 😍
Alex: Nature is TERRIFYING. Goodnight, weirdo.
Marco: dream of me 😘 and ava 🕷️
Alex: BLOCKED.
(She didn't block him. But she did turn her phone face-down and burrow under the covers, trying very hard not to imagine eight-legged roommates.)