A mansion stood quietly in the suburbs.
It wasn't particularly large for a mansion—only a handful of rooms—but it looked respectable enough. Six people could comfortably live here.
"Not bad! Very good! Very good—perfect for me!" Aqua shouted, practically bouncing in place.
…Okay?
Zunzun curled his lip in disdain.
Whether in his previous life or the one before that, the houses he'd lived in were far grander than this. Honestly, compared to this "mansion," he'd rather stay in that run-down castle in the outskirts.
Of course, because it was big, there were plenty of rumors about evil spirits lurking inside. In fact, the place had been written off as a haunted house long ago.
Kazuma said matter-of-factly, "Alright, Zunzun, you should just go back to the inn tonight. Tomorrow, after Aqua clears out all the spirits, you can move in."
"…I don't want to."
Zunzun shook his head and pressed a hand to Kazuma's shoulder, leaning in like a ghost whispering from behind.
"Kazuma, you know I live by the rule: those who don't work, don't eat. I won't abandon you. Aren't we companions? A team? Supposed to share joys and sorrows, weather the storm together?"
"Hey, hey, hey—I'm worried about you!"
"Thanks for the concern, but you should probably worry about yourself more."
"Damn it…!"
Scarlet eyes glinted dangerously. Kazuma had not expected the boomerang to come back so fast—and he might just get electrocuted tonight. In other words, he'd dug his own grave.
Looking for an escape, he turned to the idiot goddess with desperate optimism.
"No, no—it's fine! Even if this is a haunted house, we've got Aqua here, right? She's an expert in dealing with undead."
Even as he said it, unease crept into his voice. Still, given the High Priest's supposed abilities, it should be fine.
"Leave it to me!" Aqua declared. She pressed her index and middle fingers to her forehead, as if receiving divine revelation. "Oh, I see… the owner of this mansion is a little girl. Her name is Anna…"
Kazuma's expression immediately flattened. He'd lost all hope.
Her grand proclamation was like something out of a cheesy TV psychic's routine. He stared at her like she'd just tried to sell him magic beans.
Honestly, he'd trust some roadside fortune teller over Aqua.
"Zunzun, can you—"
He was about to ask if Zunzun knew anything about the spirits, but froze. Zunzun was holding Megumin in his arms like a doll, looking terrified.
…Yeah, never mind. If they couldn't even look at the problem, they sure couldn't help.
"What do you think? I really want to complain about Aqua naming the ghost already. Are we sure this is okay? Didn't we agree way too easily?"
No one answered. Apparently, they shared his unease.
Inside the mansion, Zunzun originally wanted the second-floor room with the best view—until that jerk Kazuma said, "Really? Bigger rooms just mean more evil spirits. Be careful, you might not sleep at all."
And just like that, Kazuma moved in instead.
Once rooms were assigned, everyone went their separate ways.
Despite his grumbling, Zunzun still held onto a tiny shred of hope—that Aqua's so-called goddess aura might actually drive away the spirits so he could sleep in peace.
He was almost asleep when—
Knock knock.
At the door stood a pajama-clad girl hugging a pink pillow.
"M-Megumin? Why are you here?"
"…I thought you might have trouble sleeping, so I came to help you."
"Do I look like a child?!"
Still, he was touched by the gesture. Then another thought hit him.
"Where's Yunyun?"
"…Why bring her up?"
"Well…"
Under Megumin's stare, he turned his head away, unable to explain.
"Forget it," she said quickly. "She wanted to come, too, but I sent her to help with the exorcism. I'm low on magic, so I'd just cause trouble."
She smiled, but it carried the edge of a dagger. He could easily picture Yunyun reluctantly helping Aqua.
"So, do you want help sleeping or not?"
"Yes, please."
He stepped aside to let her in.
Sharing a bed should've been nothing new—they'd done it hundreds of times—but for some reason, Zunzun felt oddly nervous. Like… a man cheating with his wife in the next room. A strangely forbidden thrill.
The bed was huge, but still—
"Megumin, don't you think I'm too close?"
"Are you saying I'm annoying?"
"No, no! Not at all."
He leaned closer. She gave a token push, then sighed like she'd run out of excuses and let him stay near.
Suddenly—
"Ahhh! Wahhh—"
"Wait, Megumin, something's happening—"
"Don't worry. Aqua's an expert; she can handle this."
"But—"
"I said don't worry."
Her glowing gaze shut him up. He lay back down, and her arms came around him again.
A soft, gentle warmth.
Different from holding his sister, or Yunyun, or Cecily. This was a warmth with its own budding charm.
"…Zunzun, what are you thinking?"
"Nothing."
"I'm getting mad."
"Sorry, I was wrong."
Better to apologize quickly than be on the receiving end of Explosion Magic.
Leaning close, she whispered, "Remember that favor you owe me from when we were in the Crimson Demon Clan?"
"…I forgot."
"HUH?!"
"Just kidding! I remember."
Back when he was trying to learn Explosion Magic, he'd put his hands on her chest "for magical research." She'd only let him after he promised her a favor.
"So what do you want?"
"I want a princess carry!"
…Not what he'd expected.
"In a romance novel I just read, the princess is carried in the hero's arms… it's wonderful!"
Her cheeks flushed, eyes sparkling.
So she still liked romance novels? Back in the Crimson Demon Clan, her favorite was the tale of the first hero defeating the Demon King. Maybe that story had a princess carry too.
"So you want to experience it?"
"That's right!"
She leaned in, close enough for him to feel her breath and the faint sweetness of her scent.
"Alright, alright—don't get so close!"
"Then let me try!"
He sighed. "Fine, Your Highness."
Her smile brightened instantly.
It was just a hug—shouldn't be a problem. He scooped her up, one arm under her back, the other under her legs.
"Ohhh—"
"It's even better than I imagined," she said dreamily.
"That's good. If this isn't enough, I'm out of ideas."
"But… I'm a little shy."
"Then let's stop."
"No! What a waste! Let's keep going—opportunities like this are rare!"
Even he felt shy now. Sure, she wasn't as beautiful as her sister, but she was undeniably cute.
Suddenly, she said, "Since this is rare… can I ask one more thing?"
"Kiss you, right?"
"What—! No! How could you even—!"
"Just kidding… huh?"
She was blushing. Her shy glances flicked up at him.
He quickly changed the subject. "What's the request?"
"I want you to say a line. Lean closer."
"Why not just say it?"
"So shy!" she protested.
With a sigh, he leaned in. "…Alright, what line?"
It turned out to be an absurdly cheesy romantic declaration from her novel.
He groaned. "If I didn't owe you, I'd never say this…"
Still, he set her gently on his lap, lifted her chin, and recited:
"Oh, Princess, your voice is lighter than the spring breeze, cleansing my soul like a clear stream. Your eyes hold more colors than the stars—so beautiful they make the heavens jealous. Your lips are brighter than blooming flowers, your smile warmer than the sun, forever shining in my heart… I swear to protect you until my last drop of blood is spilled, until my soul is gone! I love you!"
"Wahhh—"
His back prickled with embarrassment. His toes wanted to dig a hole straight to another dimension.
"This… is really good," Megumin murmured, dazed.
"You seem satisfied."
"Very, very satisfied!"
At least she was happy. That made the humiliation worth it.
"…So, we done? My arms are going numb."
"Not yet! Let me enjoy this a little longer."
"How could you—my arms, my arms—!"
He was only pretending to complain.
She giggled. "Maybe I should get used to this in the future."
Wait.
In the future?
-End Chapter-
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