What is a university like? In truth, not many people think concretely about this. A university is just a university. Usually, the image that comes to mind is sufficient.
According to an encyclopedia, it is defined as:
"An institution of higher education where various academic fields are researched and leadership qualities are cultivated."
It's quite a complex definition.
Simply put, it's a place where you study one field in depth. While in elementary, middle, and high school, we learned a variety of subjects like Korean, English, math, and science, in university, you choose one subject from a broader range and delve into it deeply.
It's a space that creates specialized experts in one field.
And it's also a society in itself.
Young adults in their early twenties gather, build friendships, and study together.
They form study groups, discuss their majors, and build knowledge and culture.
Occasionally, they bond over drinks, developing social skills and knowledge, which is the goal of university life.
At least, that's how I understood it.
...But this is just the hopeful side of university.
It's rare for someone in their early twenties to firmly decide their career path, successfully enter a university and major that matches it, and passionately pursue both self-development and networking.
Dreams are hard to achieve, and talents are even harder to find.
There are more people in the world who aren't like that.
Many just go to university and pass the time.
Those who postpone their decisions and enter university as if going with the flow make up a large proportion of university students.
They choose a major with decent grades or good employment prospects and attend without much thought. Studying is not easy if they are not interested in the major itself.
Even so, if they are sociable, they might enjoy university life to some extent, but if not, they might completely fall out.
I, 'Lee Se-won,' belonged to the latter group.
I came to university just to give it a try, but I couldn't adapt to the different university life and even received an academic warning.
And I was going to university to clean up 'Lee Se-won's' mess.
'Why do I have to go...'
I sighed inwardly with this complaint.
Anyway, I had to avoid expulsion.
It was too much to be expelled after all the money and time I had spent. I had to go to school for now.
[This stop is ○○○ Station. Passengers getting off, please use the right door.]
Soon, an announcement on the subway informed me of my arrival at the destination. Maybe because it's a world where men and women are reversed, the announcement voice was also a man with a clear voice.
I got up from my seat and trudged out.
It was quite crowded, probably because it was rush hour.
As a result, my already dirty expression became even more wrinkled.
'Why the hell is there a 9 o'clock class.'
I felt like I was going to die from exhaustion. Waking up at 2 a.m. after going to bed at 6 a.m., morning classes were too harsh for me.
I cursed a lot this morning too...
I could slightly understand the heart of the runaway ninja 'Lee Se-won.'
'Lee Se-won, have you always been fighting like this?'
Fortunately, the distance to the school was close.
Whether I had deliberately chosen a university close to my lodging, it took only 20 minutes to get there. It was really damn fortunate.
Soon, I arrived in front of the lecture room door. A nameplate reading OO Building 502 was visible on the door.
The current time was 8:52. Fortunately, there was still enough time.
"Phew..."
Before entering the lecture room, I took a moment to regulate my breathing. Strange places always made me nervous.
Especially for an introverted loner like me. Looking into 'Lee Se-won's' human relationships, it seemed he didn't have any friends he made in college.
It was inevitable because I was a year older. Even though it was only a one-year difference, there was bound to be a slight barrier when trying to get close for the first time.
And 'Lee Se-won' was an introverted person who snapped at many people, so he didn't approach first. As a result, I missed the first chance to get close, and by then, the groups had already become close.
"So, damn it..."
"Hey! Today, there's a 5:5 internal match with the Physical Education Department. Do you want to participate..."
"Hahaha! Is that true?"
As I stood there for a moment, I could hear the students chatting behind the door. The sound of girls cursing and joking with each other, and boys talking loudly. I was momentarily speechless at the strange sight.
But that was only for a moment. Now it was time to go in.
I tried to enter as quietly as possible and turned the doorknob.
But...
Click, click.
The door wouldn't open. It was as if something was caught, or something was blocking it, the door was stiff.
"Huh? What's this..."
As I was flustered for a moment, 'Lee Se-won's' memory popped into my head and informed me of the situation.
(Lee Se-won): Our university is old, so the doors are all rusty.
'Aha.'
Then I just need to apply a little more force. With that thought, I opened the door with all my might...
Bang!!!!!!!!!!
As if to announce my existence to the whole world. As if to make the loudest noise in the world.
The door opened with a loud noise.
The wall and the door of the lecture room collided, spreading noise all around. The surprised people turned their gaze towards me.
At the same time, I heard 'Lee Se-won's' memory.
(Lee Se-won): But if you apply force, it opens with a loud noise. Be careful because it draws a lot of attention, haha.
Suddenly, I realized that I was screwed.
'You should have told me that first, you bastard!!'
I quickly shouted at the guy in my head, but it was already too late.
The girls in the back who were planning a 5:5 internal match, the boys who were chatting in the front, and even some students who were quietly using their phones.
Everyone stopped what they were doing for a moment and focused their gaze on me. Dozens of eyes were solely on me.
"..."
"..."
An awkward silence that was unbearably uncomfortable. A few seconds felt like an eternity.
'Damn it, damn it...'
I felt so embarrassed that I wanted to die. I was the type of person who couldn't stand such gazes.
"..."
Unable to bear the gazes, I quickly went to my seat. Trying to maintain a poker face as much as possible, I went to the most secluded seat.
This awkward atmosphere... I didn't know how to resolve it, nor did I have the intention to. The best I could do was to quietly sit in my seat.
Did my best work? The kids finally turned their gazes away from me and started chatting with each other. I could feel occasional glances in my direction, but it was bearable.
'I want to drop out...'
A few minutes after I entered, I felt like dropping out.
Finally, the professor entered. He was a middle-aged man in his 50s. As soon as he entered, he took attendance.
"Kim Woo-sung."
"Yes."
"Kang Yoon-mi."
"Yes."
Names were called in order of student numbers. My student number was in the middle. After a while, my name was called.
"Lee Se-won?"
"Yes."
As I answered, the professor turned his head towards me.
His eyes were wide open as if surprised.
"Oh, Lee Se-won is present? It's been a long time. I almost thought I wouldn't see you again. Hohoho."
Then he said something to himself. He was smiling with his mouth, but his eyes didn't seem to be smiling.
It wasn't hard to understand the hidden meaning of his words.
In other words, he was picking on me.
'Damn it.'
He was asking what I had been doing instead of attending classes until now.
The professors naturally knew about my academic warning. That's because they had recorded my attendance.
It wasn't a pretty sight to suddenly appear after not showing up at all. It wasn't a pretty sight to appear quietly when the risk of expulsion arose.
'Who knew how to go to school...'
I felt a little unfair, but there was no way he could understand that.
"Haha..."
In the end, the only choice I had was to smile awkwardly.
I forced the corners of my mouth up to make a smile. This was my best.
The professor, who seemed to have nothing more to say, looked at me for a moment and then turned his head.
"...Well, then, let's start the class."
He picked up a pen and started writing on the whiteboard.
The real class began. Now it was time for the students who were chatting to concentrate.
But the atmosphere in the lecture room was still restless.
"Wow, he came. I haven't seen him this semester."
"Did you see him when he opened the door earlier? I almost peed my pants from the impact."
The girls behind me whispered as they looked at me. They thought they were speaking quietly, but I could hear everything.
They giggled and chatted away.
A nearby boy also said something like this.
"That guy seems a bit weird..."
Suddenly, why?
"Huh? What's going on?"
Coincidentally, a nearby man seemed to have a similar thought. His voice was slightly cracked with a nasal tone, but I liked it because it spoke for my heart.
"No, I live in a similar place to that guy? The distance is close too. But last night, I suddenly heard a screaming sound... He was screaming loudly as if he had seen something he shouldn't have. Thanks to that, I was surprised."
However, the man's logic was reasonable.
A memory flashed through my mind.
'Ah.'
It was when I checked my bank balance yesterday.
So that was heard, huh.
'Crazy, I should have been more careful...'
But what could I do? How could I not scream when 10 million won suddenly disappeared and a debt of 6 million won appeared?
It was an act of God.
But still, it was a painful mistake.
The man had enough reason to see me as a mentally ill person.
'Ha, hurry up and end...'
I listened to the class as if I was sitting on a bed of thorns.
The first day of college passed like that.