DING...
Rosinante stared in bewilderment at the glowing interface that had suddenly appeared before him. But after the initial shock came overwhelming joy, the cheat system is finally here!
A mental image immediately popped into Rosinante's mind: himself shirtless, greatblade resting on his shoulder, stretching out a hand toward Sengoku.
"Sengoku, be my son!"
Then, without warning, Sengoku would go full Buddha mode—golden form, giant shockwave instantly reducing Rosinante to ash. Not even a speck would remain.
What kind of lunatic system thinks I'm Whitebeard?! And even if I were, not even Whitebeard would dare say that to Sengoku!
"Rosinante, Rosinante!"
"Huh?"
"Would you be willing to be my son?" Sengoku asked, looking at him with hope in his eyes.
"Yes, I would, Mr. Sengoku."
"'Mr. Sengoku? Come on, call me Dad."
"Uh… D-Dad…"
Rosinante looked at Sengoku, a bit bashful. Sure, he was shameless enough to talk a big game and he definitely wanted to be adopted—there were so many benefits after all, but saying it out loud? That was something else.
It's like how people in the real world love to joke about calling "Daddy," but if you were actually face-to-face with him? Let's see how many of them could say it with a straight face.
"Alright, Rosinante. From now on, you're my good son. And—"
"Wahahaha! Sengoku, you're acting just like Whitebeard, adopting kids left and right! Wahahaha!"
Before Sengoku could deliver a heartfelt speech, Garp—ever the clown burst into laughter, pointing at Sengoku and nearly doubling over.
"Garp, you bastard!"
Sengoku grit his teeth, barely restraining himself from going full golden Buddha and pounding Garp into the deck.
"Hahaha, don't get so worked up, Sengoku. I'm just messing with you. Hey, kid! I'm your Uncle Garp. I don't have much to give you for a first meeting, but I do have this—an actual Devil Fruit I confiscated in the New World! I'll give it to you as a gift!"
"Devil Fruit?" Rosinante's eyes widened, his curiosity spiking.
A Devil Fruit! The legendary treasure of the seas! Any One Piece fan who gets teleported here would be drooling at the mention of one.
But even though Devil Fruits were amazing, you couldn't just eat any random one. In the original story, Rosinante had eaten a rather underwhelming one—the Calm-Calm Fruit, whose only effect was soundproofing. And he had the nerve to brag about it being "the best fruit for quality sleep." What a joke.
If he had eaten a Logia-type Fruit instead, the ending might have been different. Maybe he wouldn't have been able to defeat Doflamingo, but at least with intangibility, he could've escaped the Birdcage.
So, in Rosinante's new plan, eating a Devil Fruit was a must. As for not being able to swim afterward, he couldn't swim before either. He'd taken swimming lessons in college for a few days, but the pool water tasted horrible, so he'd quit.
Still, there was no way he was going to eat a Devil Fruit from Garp without knowing what it was. What if it turned out to be another "silent but useless" type?
Sure, people say there's no such thing as a bad Devil Fruit, only bad users. But come on, there's clearly a difference in the cost of these powers.
If you eat something like the Calm-Calm Fruit, you'd have to train for decades to even reach utility-level. But a Logia user can go intangible right away. It's like being born on the finish line versus starting two laps behind.
And Rosinante knew that a top-tier Logia—the Rumble-Rumble Fruit was hidden on Skypiea. A billion volts of power. Why would he waste that opportunity on Garp's mystery melon?
"Ah…Uncle Garp, this gift is way too valuable. I really can't accept it!"
Rosinante waved his hands frantically. Garp just shrugged.
"What a shame. It really is a treasure of the sea, not something you see every day."
Treasure of the sea... rare item...
Hearing that only made Rosinante more curious. To be reborn in the world of One Piece and never even see a real Devil Fruit? That'd be a regret for life.
And he wasn't going to eat it. Just look at it. What could go wrong?
"Uncle Garp, would it be alright if I just take a look at it?"
"Sure, here you go."
Garp casually tossed over the box. Rosinante eagerly opened it.
Inside was a melon-shaped fruit covered in strange, swirling patterns.
"So this… is the Devil Fruit?"
He brought it close to his face, scrutinizing it like a scientist examining a rare compound. Meanwhile, Garp turned to Sengoku.
"Got any more rice crackers?"
"Nope."
"Liar. I saw you stash a pack behind your cloak earlier."
"I'm telling you, it's gone."
"Gone? Then what's this!?"
"HEY! Garp, give me back my rice crackers!"
"Wahahaha! No way! You said you ate them all, liar gets nothing!"
…
While Garp and Sengoku fought over rice crackers, Rosinante lifted the Devil Fruit to his nose and gave it a sniff.
Doesn't smell weird... They say it tastes like crap, but maybe that's just a rumor?
He brought it to his lips, almost as if preparing for a bite—then stopped and laughed.
Come on, I'm not that dumb. No way I'm actually eating it.
Just as he was thinking that, Garp dodged a lunge from Sengoku and stumbled backward—
WHAM!
He crashed right into Rosinante's back.
And in that exact moment, Rosinante had his mouth open, playfully pretending to bite the fruit.
The impact knocked him forward.
CRUNCH.
He bit right into the Devil Fruit.
"BLEGH! Tastes like actual garbage!!"
The taste hit him like a freight train.
Don't ask how he knew what garbage tasted like. Honestly, he didn't. He was just repeating what everyone else said. He'd never tasted actual trash, and he sure as hell wasn't about to try.
"BLUHHH—HUAGHHH—"
Rosinante collapsed on the deck, violently gagging, fingers jammed down his throat trying to puke it back out. Tears welled in his eyes.
The Rumble-Rumble Fruit... I was supposed to eat the Rumble-Rumble Fruit... This isn't how it was supposed to go…
"GARP!" Sengoku roared.
"I-It was an accident!" Garp stammered, bewildered.
His words only made things worse.
Rosinante wailed louder, sobbing uncontrollably—but to everyone's shock, no sound came out.
"Eh? What's up with this kid?" Garp scratched his head. "Why's his mouth wide open but no sound's coming out?"
(End of Chapter)
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