"Of course it's a compliment!" Ah-Head said proudly, chin raised like a man who'd just solved the world's greatest mystery. "Fengchu means… uh… Wolong! Yeah, it's definitely something good!"
"Exactly!" Ah-Dai puffed out his chest, nodding with great confidence. "He's praising us!"
Ritter nearly fell off his tiny boat laughing. "You don't even understand what it means, but you're confident anyway? Well, I guess that's one kind of strength."
He wiped away a tear, chuckling. "So… you guys still planning to rob me?"
Ah-Dai blinked, suddenly remembering the reason they stopped him in the first place. He tried to put on a serious face. "R-right! Stay serious, men! Hand over half your fresh water!" He peeked at Ritter's water barrel mid-sentence, clearly tempted.
Ritter almost laughed again. These guys were too harmless to even call themselves pirates.
Ah-Dai turned red under his sunburnt skin. "W-we only want half! Not all of it!" His three crewmates nodded eagerly, all of them staring at the water barrel like starving men at a feast.
Ritter shook the barrel teasingly. "You sure about that? Even if you take half, would it last until you reach the next island?"
The "pirates" huddled together and started whispering intensely. Five minutes later, they shuffled back, looking defeated.
"Not enough," Ah-Dai mumbled, pushing the barrel back toward Ritter. "But… could we just drink a little?"
Ritter glanced at their cracked lips and hollow eyes. "How long since your last proper meal?"
"Three days…" muttered Ah-Head. "We raided a pirate ship last month, but it turned out they'd just robbed a village. So we… uh… gave the food back."
Ritter raised an eyebrow. "And starved yourselves?"
Ah-Dai scratched his head sheepishly. "The villagers had old folks and kids. We still had some strength, so we figured… we'd manage somehow."
Ritter couldn't help but sigh. "The diversity of life at sea never fails to amaze me."
Later that evening, a bonfire crackled on a small island nearby. The scent of roasted boar filled the salty air.
Ah-Dai's crew tore into the meat like wild beasts, tears streaming down their faces. "So good… I've never tasted anything this good in my life!" Ah-Dai sobbed, half-laughing, half-choking on his food.
"Slow down before you choke," Ritter said, tossing another skewer a roasted rabbit across the fire.
Ah-Dai caught it clumsily, eyes shining with gratitude. "Boss! You're too kind! You're our real boss now!"
He turned and shouted to his men, "Brothers, say thank you to Boss Ritter!"
"Thank you, Boss!" The chorus came out uneven but heartfelt.
Ritter rubbed the back of his neck. "These guys… definitely not professional pirates."
"Alright then," he said after a moment, smiling faintly. "If you're done being pirates, I can find you work."
All four pairs of eyes lit up like lanterns. "Really, Boss? You'd do that for us?"
"Sure," Ritter replied. "Not as my crew on the Blumarine Jackson, though. You four aren't exactly… battle material."
Through their rambling introductions, Ritter pieced together their story.
The lanky one, Ah-Ya, was supposedly the "strategist," though his plans rarely worked.
Ah-Head, the "thinker," was the ship's loudmouth and source of comic relief.
Ah-Fish barely spoke, but he was a skilled fisherman unfortunately, their recent routes had been barren seas.
And finally, Ah-Dai, the self-proclaimed captain, was strong enough to wrestle a sea cow, though Ritter figured even Colonel Morgan could beat him.
Their collective bounty? A grand total of 65.25 berries. Not thousand just sixty-five and a quarter.
The number wasn't symbolic; it was pity. The Navy likely issued the bounty just to make them take down their pirate flag and stop embarrassing the profession. In fact, printing the wanted posters probably cost more than the bounty itself.
Not everyone with a low bounty can be like Tony Tony Chopper.
Ritter chuckled. "So, what would you four do if you hadn't met me?"
Ah-Dai wiped grease from his mouth and said seriously, "We were planning to join Captain Buggy! I heard he's hiring! Free food and lodging!"
Ritter blinked. "Buggy? He's still recruiting… in Paradise?"
Now that was interesting.
Ritter leaned back, thoughtful. Buggy's name had popped up in recent news alongside Shanks. "Red-Haired Shanks bounty, 1.16 billion. Clown Buggy bounty, 1.03 billion."
Compared to the original timeline, their positions had shifted. Buggy wasn't just a joke anymore. His reputation, his crew, even his influence all had grown dramatically.
Ritter smirked. "Guess that's partly my fault, huh?"
Still, he couldn't help but frown. "Recruiting in Paradise? That fool hasn't changed one bit."
He exhaled through his nose, tone turning low and amused. "Oh, little Buggy… it's been too long since someone smacked sense into you."
The four "pirates" shivered in unison.
"B-Boss… you know Captain Buggy?" Ah-Dai asked timidly.
Ritter smiled faintly, eyes gleaming with mischief. "Know him? You could say I trained him once."
He stood, brushing sand from his coat. "Well, boys, looks like I've got somewhere to be and gifts to prepare for my nephews."
Ah-Dai gulped. "Nephews?"
Ritter grinned. "You'll see."
Far out on the horizon, the sea shimmered under the sunset.
Somewhere beyond that glow, a certain red-nosed clown was blissfully unaware that a storm one named Ritter was about to visit his "recruitment office."
And when that day came, Buggy would remember every painful, humiliating drill session from his days on the Oro Jackson.
Ritter stretched lazily, stepping back onto his small boat. "Well then, Paradise… show me what's new."
The waves lapped gently against the hull, and the four newly reformed "pirates" waved until he was out of sight, their stomachs finally full, their hearts strangely light.
"Boss Ritter's a good man," Ah-Head murmured.
Ah-Ya nodded. "Think Buggy's hiring's still open?"
Ah-Dai wiped his greasy hands, eyes shining. "No matter what, we'll make him proud!"
Behind them, the bonfire burned bright against the night, and the laughter of fools drifted across the sea a sound that somehow made the vast ocean feel just a little bit warmer.
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