The night sky was clearer than usual, most of the city visible from where they were in the sky, flying slowly without a destination in mind.
It's probably not a good idea to be carrying her in my arms, holding her in such close proximity, with my currently unstable mind.
He saw her face which was pale with a bit of fright and excitement mixed in as she constantly kept pivoting her cute little head around, her hair swishing in the winds.
Oh well, I can't just stop and drop her either.
And if I were being honest...
Sanit sniffed the air a little and breathed in her presence, closing his eyes involuntarily.
I don't think I really want to anyway.
Her scent was sweet to his nose and it kept wanting for a more better waft of her smell.
Her very essence of feminity too tempting to ignore and too difficult to pass on.
He felt this animalistic urge to clutch her so close that she would meld into him while also wanting to keep her away from him as far as possible.
He had to find a way to distract himself.
"You're clutching my neck a bit too tightly." His tone was both a warning to himself and a request to her.
"Huh what?" Piya asked a little distractedly before relaxing her hold on him, "oh sorry. It's just that--this is incredible. I think I can even see my college and house from here."
"You can?"
"Not entirely but I can make out where they'd be in the general direction from up here."
She led him to some of the sights of the city, the night sky illuminated with the city's lights and slow traffic movements.
His travel in the air with her was in a slow pace. Not too hurried.
The pale city lights along with the moon's reflected a hue so pretty on her face, it was bewitching and Sanit was struggling to hold himself.
Then she pointed to the college where they had first met, "that's the building."
She pointed to one among many but Sanit was distracted, merely nodding in response.
"You remember where your hostel is?" her question snapped him to reality.
"Uh I think it's somewhere there," he drifted to a part of the area where there was a tenement and a cluster of small apartments.
"It's that one," Piya pointed to a peach building and he hovered above it before slowly descending on its rooftop tank.
He slowly brought Piya's legs to the ground before letting her go and watched as she straightened her hair, her dress which was all wrinkled up.
That skin is unnaturally soft. I want it all.
NO! NO!
But it was too late.
"I don't know your room number though so that's for you-"
He interrupted her with a kiss that was so sudden in it's urgency that it first made her flinch, her eyes widening at the sudden gesture.
It wasn't a long kiss and he could still feel a slight tremble in both their bodies at the intimate contact as they parted. Or rather he did. Piya just stood stunned in place.
"That's one another thing I have regretted not doing overtime."
Speaking from a past of a memory long ago it made sense to Sanit but in the present, it was inexcusable.
Sanit pulled back, pleased with himself. He had mixed opinions on if he would tear up something but he thought it had gone well.
He knew it had been getting uncontrollable and irresistible to give in to something.
Anything, to enjoy the urge. And now that he had refused the guilt, he found himself taking solace in the brief pleasure of the kiss.
This is better. This is not too bad, right?
But when he saw the look on Piya's face he realized he had messed up.
Her voice was soft and cracked, "what the hell was that?"
He saw her wiping her lips with the back of her palm and looking at him with a look of almost...betrayal.
She felt like she was seeing someone else. Or rather something else in place of the boy she was with just a second ago.
At this moment all she wanted was to get away from whatever he had initiated.
No. No, this is bad. Her face says it all. Why did I give in to it? I was doing so good....aagghh
He had simply wanted to give in, waiting for the perfect moment or reason to fulfill himself.
Yes that's what he had wanted to do from the start. This was just one of it.
There's so many more urges to act on after all. Why stop here and now?
Right now she was here. With him. Alone.
Sanit knew in his heart that it was the accursed bloodlust speaking but it felt more like the 'him' he recognized.
The version of his self that he related more with.
A corrupt soul rotting in the realm for survival. Is that what I'll always be then?
Piya thought she was mistaken when she briefly saw him audibly snarl in her direction.
Stop! Stop this! This will go horribly wrong for her.
Sanit could see her step back a little and his foot seemed to mimick her. Moving forward to her. His arms trying to lift and grab hold of her.
And he was close to it. Very close.
He raised his hands to her, "this...I," he was interrupted by someone's voice.
"Yo Sanit...is that really you?!"
A voice beneath them startled both and Piya took the opportunity to descend the ladder from the rooftop tank to the lower roof, not meeting Sanit's gaze.
"P...piya," he whispered half-heartedly not wanting her to respond.
I can't even imagine what kind of a face she's gonna make if I try to stop her.
He watched her land on her feet, before walking past the guy who had just interrupted them.
And then slamming the gate to the roof behind her, she left.
Sanit turned to the guy who had spoke. He was a stout boy, wearing just a banyan and shorts with half a dozen clothes in a bucket.
"Um, hi." He descended the rungs slowly, pitying himself over and over as he did so.
"Dude where the hell have you been? We all thought you were pretty much dead after what happened to Akhil. And how the hell did you get a girl past everyone and up here at that? Hello are you listening?"
Sanit's mind was preoccupied and this constant barrage of questions wasn't helping him either.
Right. This is the hostel. So he's probably a roommate or a neighbor.
"No. I'm fine," Sanit spoke up, clearing his throat, "just had a few things to clear up."
"If you say so," the boy still had a suspicious gaze but held back from attacking him with more questions he wasn't ready to answer, "but we need to talk about a lot. By the way who was the chick that rushed past?"
Sanit stared longingly at the gate Piya had just passed through.
"A friend."
The guy mouthed the same word with a quizzical look and became more perplexed when Sanit asked, "remind me what's your name again?"
"You forgot?" the guy paused and blinked before saying, "I'm Muneeb."
"Right." He looked away hoping he would see Piya loitering somewhere but she wasn't.
He finally turned to Muneeb and asked
"Can you show me where I stay?"
Muneeb sighed and led the way downstairs. After two floors he led him through a corridor to the room at the far end of it.
"This is yours. You used to bunk with Akhil, but now it's just you and your lone ass."
Sanit stepped in to enter a world of neglect. Books, clothes, bags, random plastic were scattered around.
Very unlike Piya's place.
That it was the first thought on seeing the state of the room, made him realize how much of a mark she had left on him in that small amount of a time.
The left corner had a small table and the right one had a bunk bed. Both of them cleaner than the room. On the farther corner, just a few meters away from where he was, stood a sink and a mirror above it.
On his immediate left was a wooden cupboard and next to it was a built in shelf with four granite slabs as separating compartments. The four of them dustier than the other.
Sanit touched his shirt and realized he was still wearing Piya's father's clothes and smiled sheepishly.
"Oh well," he removed the buttons slowly and turned to where he thought Muneeb would still be by the doorway, but was instead greeted by emptiness.
He moved to the bed, his feet feeling the coldness of the cement floor seep into him and deeper into his soul.
The bed spring of the lower bed creaked in protest after he bent to avoid hitting the upper berth and sat with his hands over his head.
A familiar sight among today's youth, all on the verge of a depressive nature, but Sanit didn't know that. He didn't even know what he was feeling right then.
Damn I screwed up.
It didn't last long though. That empty feeling that was creeping into his mind was soon overtaken by the rush of what happened next.
Muneeb had taken it upon himself to spread the word of his 'return' among the neighboring rooms and the boys had all filed in, a whole group of them in fact.
When the first ones saw him with his head between his hands they hesitated a little before a bespectacled one stepped forward, "bhai, your friend will be alright, don't be too down man."
Sanit looked up and was startled at the number of guys who were looking at him.
Their looks were curious of course, but the majority were just in silent pity.
He felt a bit sick at the moment for giving them the wrong impression but he had no mood to correct them.
I guess people think what they wanna think.
"Hey seriously guys, he just came back what's all this gloom and doom? Bencho...let's be happy this idiot's in one piece at least!"
The boys all hooted together, "Yeaaahhh!!"
And for the next hour they surrounded him, most of them half-dressed, some reluctantly there while others were just talking amongst themselves as glasses of local beer got passed around in steel glasses.
When he was handed one he sniffed it, his face scrunched up, "what's that?"
The boys laughed, "what's that he asks. It's beer you poser."
He eyed them all suspiciously, "and what does it do?"
"Gets you drunk of course. Drink up now!"
Despite their insistence he politely declined. Anything that could dull his senses didn't feel right, not with his bloodlust still peaking at absurd and random times.
Sanit looked around as many of them introduced themselves, and he took it all in without question.
This ain't too bad.
Some of them brought in an induction stove and Bluetooth speakers, blasting Hindi songs as they got together to cook up some fried rice.
The burnt smell of food made Sanit realize he hadn't eaten almost a day and his friends were very much amused at the way he wolfed it down despite everyone else complaining about the mish-mash spices and mixtures that were in all the wrong ratios.
Sanit had gotten tired of repeating that he was alright to everyone who kept asking him again and again, making up some story of being midly injured only, which to his relief they either bought or simply looked past it.
As it got late they began to filter out, some of the other rooms still playing music and some of them passed out on the corridor before the warden brought out his cane.
"You're a tough nut dude, not even a big smile after all that?" Muneeb prodded him as he came out of Sanit's room, his speech slurring a little due to the many beers he had chugged.
Sanit's eyebrows shot up, "are you kidding me? You guys kept me smiling so much my cheeks hurt now."
Muneeb cracked up and threw his head back, "you absolute dork."
Sanit couldn't help but smile again, something he had gotten used to now in this new body thanks to his hostel mates.
They had an infectious rhythm to them, Sanit understood, from the hour he had spent with them. Then again it made sense. Most of them came from far away places beyond this city, leaving behind their homes.
Everyone needed someone to fall back on and lose themselves once in a while after all.
Maybe I'll stick around them longer than usual and surprise myself.
Muneeb cleared his throat and adopted a serious tone all of a sudden, "so I have been meaning to ask you?"
Is it about my roommate again?
Sanit could feel himself sweat a little at having to lie again for this but prepared himself.
Muneeb looked around as if going to ask something very serious, "that girl you were with? You have her number yet?"
Sanit stared at his new friend's face but when it remained unchanged, he pushed him gently back and was about to shut the door of his room at Muneeb's open mouth.
"Yo wait, wait, wait. I was kidding," he cackled.
Yeah I think I might have to reconsider my future relations a little bit more throughly.
"But I could tell you were pretending to be upset about your roommate."
Sanit stiffened.
Have I been caught out?
"I know," Muneeb raised a hand as he burped and excused himself before continuing, "that you were actually more upset about that girl."
Sanit closed his eyes in relief, "uh, yeah I guess," he scratched his head in mild annoyance at the thought of being judged.
"If it makes you feel better though, I saw her smiling as she left," with that Muneeb patted Sanit's shoulder and walked to his room, waving from behind.
Sanit came out to watch Muneeb tottering and leaning against the walls, a little disoriented at his words.
He closed his door and leant against it, feeling light headed now at the sudden revelation.
His eyes traveled to all parts of the room, taking in the disorderly mess it had become and wondering how he was going to live here.
Or if he wanted to live here at all.
"No, no, enough of that," he slapped himself and let an involuntary shiver pass through him, getting goosebumps at the thought of his near future where he had no idea what he was going to do.
All he knew for certain was that it was time to get his life in order.
And it was mainly one thought constantly running in his mind that kept him going.
Which also kept him grinning like the biggest idiot ever.
At least she smiled.