I woke up to Llewellyn half on top of me. His nose brushed my throat, his arm was flung over me, and our legs were—
Yeah. Tangled.
"…"
I stared at the ceiling.
I'd brought this on myself. No one else to blame here.
I wanted to move, but.
I didn't want to wake him.
Nothing had happened last night, but clearly that was worse. I could feel where his breath kept landing, making my whole body tighten.
Llewellyn stirred.
Ah, damn it.
If I stayed still, completely still, maybe he'd settle back down—
But then I felt his fingers tighten around my waist.
"You're awake," Llewellyn murmured, voice low, nosing a little closer.
I swallowed. My body felt hot.
"Technically," I managed. "I was hoping you'd be the one to wake up first and make it weird."
There was a beat. I could feel him thinking.
He shifted, lifting his head just slightly, eyes finding mine.
"How weird?"
Great. Amazing. I was going to die in this bed, apparently.
I made the mistake of looking at his bed hair then at his mouth.
"I thought—" The word caught. "Wake-up-in-a-panic kind of weird? Maybe I could add a dramatic yelp. You fall off the bed and I deny remembering ever pulling you into bed with me."
Llewellyn's lips quirked up.
"This is not the first time we've shared a bed," he noted. "And you're not yelping."
"I'm… choosing silence."
"You're talking."
"Silence doesn't work when you're—uh—looking at me like that."
What was I even saying?!
His fingers flexed around my waist.
"Should I stop?"
I really couldn't breathe properly. My body was having opinions. Loud ones.
…What was the question again?
"You're—very close," I muttered.
"I'm aware."
A breath passed. Then another.
If one of us leaned in—
But we didn't.
Llewellyn exhaled.
One part of me wanted him to move away. The other really didn't.
He was hot. And breathing against my lips. And smelled unfairly good.
And I wanted to grab him by the collar and—
No. No, we were not doing that.
I was dying to. That was the problem.
And right now I could just yank him forward very slightly and—
But.
If this became a thing, and I fucked things up, and he refused to partner up with me anymore, the next time the System sent him in, he'd be alone.
With his 67% chance of lethal outcome.
He'd even asked if my contract had an end date, and I hadn't even fucked anything up yet!
I wanted to kiss him.
But I didn't want him to die.
…Wait, that sounded wrong. My kisses weren't poisonous.
The point was, this was a bad idea.
Llewellyn's weight shifted, bringing him fractionally closer. My pulse hammered so hard I was sure he could feel it.
"You're thinking very loudly."
"You're—" I swallowed. "Not helping."
He moved slightly and his breath hit my jaw. "Should I help?"
My whole body jolted. I opened my mouth, but nothing came out.
"You're doing this on purpose," I accused after a moment.
"Doing what? I'm not—doing anything." A beat. His voice was low, but not as steady as before. "You haven't even yelped yet."
"…"
I was really going to die.
"Your ears are red," I fumbled, just to shift the attention off me.
"Are they?"
"Yeah."
"Mm."
Somehow my hand was on his back—and. Under his shirt. When had that happened? Anyway, it was not like I was going to take it back.
I closed my eyes and repositioned slightly.
"Let's… pretend I'm still asleep."
Llewellyn's nose brushed my cheek. "That would be easier if you stopped talking."
This asshole.
My heartbeat felt annoyingly loud in my ears.
"…You're not going to get off me, are you?"
"That depends. Do you want me to?"
I opened my eyes again. I'd sort of… turned toward him even more, apparently. Not that there was any distance at all. He was still half on top of me. But now our lips were really as close as they could be.
"…No."
Wait, I hadn't meant to say that.
Can't the System send a notification or something? Like, [System Notification: Sexual engagement with Partner right now will yield optimal outcome!]
Llewellyn didn't move but his fingers tightened slightly. His mouth kept hovering too close to mine.
I wanted to roll him over, pin him down, and take him on this bed. Or the reverse, I wasn't picky.
This was terrible.
…Now that I thought about it, he probably preferred the reverse.
Suddenly, I was imagining it. Superimposed onto our last… training.
I shivered.
The problem here was that he seemed… very willing. And.
Obviously I was.
The last thing I wanted was to give the impression that I was rejecting him.
Ah, what a mess.
Maybe I should just take his clothes off and pull him down.
The hand on my waist had found skin. Then his fingers slid down to my hipbone.
I was burning up.
"You're still here," I said.
"You said not to move."
"That was ten seconds ago."
"…Besides—"
"Besides?"
"You're holding me here."
I—Oh.
Yeah, I was doing that.
The hand not under his shirt had somehow ended up in his hair. It was... stupidly soft. Llewellyn let out a shaky breath.
This was going to go down as the worst case of blue balls in history. Not yanking him into a kiss at the very least sounded like the stupidest idea anyone had ever had.
I tugged on his hair without meaning to. Just a little.
Llewellyn made a noise that went straight to my—
"…"
We stared at each other, his lips parted in what looked like half-shock.
I'd never seen him this flustered. If he didn't move off soon I was really going to—
From somewhere to the side, Penguin chirped.
Then Lumos barked too, for good measure.
Llewellyn's forehead dropped onto my sternum and he took a deep breath. After a long moment, he rolled off the bed.
"I need caffeine," I said.
What I actually needed was… yeah, not that.
***
In the kitchen, I leaned back against the counter, hoping it grounded me.
Llewellyn brushed past to grab a mug, and his shoulder bumped mine. Then he turned the coffee machine on to make coffee.
I stared at the full mug Llewellyn handed me, and tried to remember how to be a person who wasn't overly preoccupied with ripping his clothes off and getting my mouth on his jaw, his throat, his—
"Is this coffee," I said, "or am I being tested."
"You haven't even tried it."
Yes, but. It looked too watery.
I took a sip, just to prove my point, but it was actually very good.
Llewellyn clocked my expression and looked smug.
…This was torture.
"Your hair's a mess," I said, just to hit back with something.
He raised an eyebrow. "I think that's your fault."
"…"
Okay, that backfired.
Llewellyn reached around me to get a spoon, so for a moment I was caged in.
Even that felt good. What the hell.
I took another sip. "You always hover this much in the morning?"
"I like to use the counter."
"There's an entire counter on the other side."
"This one has you in front of it."
Ah, damn it.
"…" I took another sip and met his eyes. "So it's a territorial thing."
"Possibly," Llewellyn said. Then, rougher, "You're wearing my clothes."
…Oh.
Llewellyn's ears went red and he stepped back immediately, like he wished he could rewind that sentence.
I had to stop myself from following. I was literally one full-body impulse away from dragging him back and damn the consequences.
This was the worst test of willpower I'd ever failed while still technically passing.
I rubbed my face.
"I—Um. Before I go—"
I wasn't sure what I should say. I really didn't want to go.
Just then, the System chimed in.
[System Notification: Setting up a new training session is highly recommended! Awaiting joint confirmation.]
No, what?!
I mean, at least my input was requested this time, but was this the best time to schedule sweaty, hands‑on, boundary‑pushing, possibly soaked, pinning-to-the ground action with—
We both groaned.
We were saved from having to reply by Llewellyn's phone vibrating nearby.
Llewellyn frowned and reached out for it.
"Tiernan," he answered.
I couldn't hear what he was saying, but Llewellyn's expression didn't look good. "Are you sure?"
A longer pause.
"Alright, thank you. Let me know if you find out more."
Llewellyn hung up and moved closer again, to make his own coffee this time.
I should have probably moved, but… I didn't.
I was caged in again. He stayed there.
"Tiernan has just received the first results of their analysis. Apparently, the artifact had been tampered with then forcefully activated from a distance."