"GAH!"
Zhan let out a scream that echoed through the narrow alleyway behind the old school building. His voice cracked with pain and terror as the bigger boy's fist connected with his ribs once again, sending sharp waves of agony through his entire body.
"Didn't... I TELL YOU NOT TO SCREAM?"
The boy had a deep voice that sounded much older than his teenage appearance, making him seem like a dangerous predator instead of just another student. His dark eyes burned with cruel satisfaction as he watched Zhan crumple against the cold brick wall.
He grabbed Zhan by the collar of his school uniform and slammed him harder against the rough stones. The impact knocked the breath out of Zhan's lungs and left scrapes along his back that burned like fire.
"JUST TAKE IT LIKE A GOOD DOG."
He commanded with a twisted smile spreading across his face like poison. His grip tightened around Zhan's throat, cutting off his air supply and making black spots dance at the edges of his vision.
"N-no... Please... I'm a man... Stop..."
Zhan pleaded in a weak, trembling voice that barely came out as a whisper. His whole body was shaking with fear and exhaustion from the daily beatings that had become as regular as breathing.
He was being bullied every single day after school by the same group of boys, but he couldn't do anything about it. His small, weak frame was no match for their size and cruelty, and there was nobody who cared enough to help him.
The bully continued his assault for what felt like an eternity. Zhan could only close his eyes and endure the pain, feeling his soul break a little more with each blow that landed on his already bruised body.
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"What a true good boy you are, Zhan."
The bully walked away slowly, not even bothering to look back at the broken figure lying motionless on the ground. His footsteps echoed off the alley walls as he disappeared into the busy street, whistling a cheerful tune like nothing had happened.
Zhan was lying on the cold, filthy ground behind the alleyway, his body broken and his spirit completely crushed. His school uniform was torn in multiple places, stained with fresh blood and dirt from the pavement.
Tears came down from his swollen face in steady streams that he couldn't control anymore. The salty drops mixed with the blood from his split lip, creating pink trails that dripped onto the concrete below.
—Why does it have to be like this..?
He looked up at the narrow strip of sky visible between the tall buildings that towered over him like prison walls. The bright blue color seemed to mock his suffering with its peaceful, carefree appearance.
Despite Zhan's terrible situation, the sky was happily blue and clear without a single cloud in sight. Birds flew overhead freely, completely unaware of the hell that was happening just a few feet below them.
"Why..."
He raised his trembling, bloodied hand up toward the sky, reaching desperately for something that would never come. His fingers stretched out like he was trying to grab onto hope itself, but there was nothing there to hold onto.
Like he wanted God to reach down and pull him out of this nightmare that had become his daily reality. Like he wanted to fly away from all the pain and never have to face another day of torture.
He picked up his tattered, ripped clothes, and put them on.
He stood up slowly and painfully, sighing deeply as every muscle in his battered body protested the movement. His legs felt weak and unsteady, threatening to collapse beneath him at any moment.
His clothes were tattered and ripped beyond any hope of repair. The white shirt that his mother had carefully washed and pressed that morning was now destroyed, just like everything else good in his life.
The streets were full of students walking home from school, each one turning to stare at him as he stumbled past like a zombie. Their eyes were filled with pity, disgust, or cruel amusement at seeing someone so pathetic and broken.
He felt deeply uncomfortable under their judgmental stares and whispered comments. Some of them pointed at him and laughed with their friends, making him feel even more ashamed and isolated than he already was.
He opened the front door to his small, run-down house and put his torn shoes in the old shoebox by the entrance. The familiar smell of poverty and desperation greeted him like an unwelcome but expected visitor.
He hung his destroyed jacket on the rusty hook by the door and put his bloodstained clothes in the overflowing laundry basket. His movements were slow and mechanical, like a broken robot trying to complete its programming.
His face was as dead and emotionless as ever, showing no trace of hope or life behind his dull eyes. He had learned long ago that showing his feelings only brought more pain and humiliation from the cruel world around him.
He climbed the creaky wooden staircase that groaned and complained under his weight with each step. The old boards were warped and loose from years of neglect, threatening to break through and send him crashing down.
But he stopped abruptly right outside his mother's bedroom door when he heard the familiar sounds coming from inside. His heart sank into his stomach like a stone as he realized what was happening behind that thin wooden barrier.
He fell down hard onto the cold floor, sitting with his back pressed against the peeling wallpaper. Fresh tears started flowing down his bruised and swollen face as his hands clenched into tight, angry fists.
The sounds from his mother's room made him feel sick to his very core. He knew exactly what she was doing in there and why she felt like she had no other choice.
He opened the door slowly and quietly, trying not to make any noise that might disturb what was happening inside. The hinges squeaked softly as the door swung open to reveal the tragic scene that had become all too familiar.
A bald man in wrinkled, dirty clothes pushed past him roughly without saying a word. The stranger's face was filled with guilt and shame as he hurried out of the house, not wanting to face the reality of what he had just done.
His mother was sitting on the edge of her unmade bed with her head buried in her trembling hands. She looked up when she heard him enter, and he could see the deep shame and self-hatred written clearly across her tired, worn face.
"Mom... D-didn't I tell you not to do it again?"
His voice broke completely as he spoke those painful words, unable to hide the disappointment and heartbreak that filled every corner of his soul. He had begged her so many times to find another way to survive.
His mother felt the crushing weight of guilt pressing down on her shoulders like a mountain of shame. She could see the pain in her son's eyes, and it made her want to disappear from the world forever.
She stood up on shaking legs and walked over to him with tears streaming down her hollow cheeks. Her thin arms wrapped around his fragile body as she pulled him into a desperate, clinging hug.
"I'm sorry... We needed the money."
She cried over his shoulders as they both collapsed onto the floor together in their shared misery and desperation. Her tears soaked into his torn shirt, mixing with the blood and sweat that was already there from his beating.
"I'm sorry... I'm sorry... Please..."
She pleaded for forgiveness that she didn't believe she deserved, her long black hair falling over her back like a dark waterfall of sorrow. Her brown eyes were filled with pain, regret, and self-loathing that cut deeper than any physical wound.
"M-Mom... It's okay."
Zhan stood up carefully and lifted his mother in his arms, surprised once again by how light and fragile she had become. She felt like she might break apart in his hands if he wasn't gentle enough with her.
He carried her over to the bed and laid her down as gently as possible, pulling the thin, worn blanket up to her chin. She looked so small and broken lying there, like a child who had lost her way in a dark, cruel world.
"It's okay, Mom. It's okay."
He whispered softly as he brushed the damp hair away from her face with tender, loving fingers. His voice was full of forgiveness and unconditional love, even though his own heart was shattering into countless pieces.
He left her room quietly, closing the door behind him with the softest possible click so he wouldn't disturb her fragile peace. The narrow hallway felt cold and empty as he walked the short distance to his own bedroom.
He went to his room, which was located just to the right of his mother's room down the dark, narrow hallway. The door was old and painted white, but most of the paint had peeled off over the years, leaving ugly patches of bare wood exposed.
He opened the door, and it made its usual loud creaking sound that echoed through the quiet house like a dying animal's cry. The sound seemed to mock him with its persistence and refusal to be silenced.
He instantly fell onto his small, uncomfortable bed without even bothering to change out of his torn and bloodied clothes. His fists were clenched so tightly that his fingernails dug deep, painful crescents into his sweaty palms.
"KILL MEE... KILL ME!!! FUCKING KILL ME!"
He begged for God to end his unbearable suffering, his voice muffled by the thin pillow that smelled of old tears and broken dreams. His whole body shook with rage, despair, and complete hopelessness.
"PLEASE, JUST LET ME DIE, KILL ME!"
He grabbed the small wooden cross that sat on his rickety desk next to his bed with desperate, grasping fingers. It was the only thing his father had left behind before abandoning them to this hell years ago.
"I DON'T WANT TO DO THIS ANYMORE..."
His voice was raw and hoarse from screaming, and his throat felt like it was being torn apart by razor blades. But the words kept pouring out of him like blood from an open wound that wouldn't stop bleeding.
"AT LEAST... MAKE MY MOTHER HAPPY!"
He kept begging and pleading with a God who seemed to have forgotten that they even existed in this world. He held the cross so tightly that it left deep red marks and cuts on his already injured palms.
"JUST LET HER... BE HAPPY... PLEASE..!"
His voice finally broke completely and utterly, and he couldn't release any more tears from his exhausted, dehydrated body. He had cried so much over the years that he felt completely empty inside, like a dried-up river bed.
He finally went silent, his breathing heavy and labored in the suffocating darkness of his small, cramped room. The only sounds were his racing heartbeat and the steady, mocking ticking of the old alarm clock on his nightstand.
He closed his swollen, red eyes and fell into a restless sleep filled with nightmares and memories of pain. His dreams were haunted by the faces of his tormentors and the sound of his mother's quiet, heartbroken sobs.
"Zhan... I'm sorry..."
His mother cried softly outside his bedroom door, her back pressed against the cold wood as she slid down to the floor. She had heard every word of his desperate prayers, and each one pierced through her heart like a poison arrow.
"I didn't want this to happen..."
Her voice was barely a whisper, but it carried the weight of all her guilt, shame, and regret for the choices she had been forced to make. She wished she could take away all of his pain and suffering, even if it meant doubling her own.
"I'm sorry for being such a pathetic mother... Zhan..."
She curled up into a tight fetal position on the bare, cold floor of the hallway. Her body shook with silent, violent sobs as she cried for her son, for herself, and for the normal life they would never have.
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—I... Slept for two hours...
Zhan's eyes were puffy and swollen from crying, with dark purple circles underneath them that made him look like he had been beaten even worse than he actually had. His whole body felt like it had been run over by a truck and left to rot.
He stood up slowly and painfully, then opened his bedroom door while wincing at the familiar creaking sound it made. Every muscle in his battered body ached and protested with each small movement he tried to make.
He went down the stairs carefully, gripping the wobbly wooden railing tightly because his legs still felt weak and unsteady beneath him. His empty stomach was growling loudly and angrily, reminding him that he hadn't eaten anything since early that morning.
But when he reached the bottom of the stairs, he was genuinely surprised to see his mother sitting beside their small, worn dining table. She was waiting for him with a gentle, loving smile on her face, despite everything terrible that had happened that day.
"Mom..?"
Zhan spoke softly, truly surprised and confused to see her there instead of hiding in her room. He had expected her to be too ashamed and guilty to face him after what he had witnessed earlier.
"Zhan..! Happy birthday!"
Despite suffering through so much pain, humiliation, and heartbreak, she was still somehow able to smile brightly for her beloved son. Her voice was cheerful and warm, as if she was trying to chase away all the darkness that surrounded their lives.
On the table in front of her sat a small chocolate cake with seventeen flickering candles arranged carefully on top. It wasn't fancy or expensive, but it had been bought with all the love and sacrifice she had left in her broken heart.
"M-Mom... Y-you should've forgotten about it... You did all that for this..."
He ran across the small room and hugged her tightly, his thin arms wrapping around her fragile frame like he was afraid she might disappear. He couldn't believe that she had remembered his birthday after everything they had both endured.
"Don't be like that."
She patted his back gently and lovingly as she held him as close to her heart as possible. Her touch was soft and comforting, like a warm blanket on the coldest and darkest winter night.
"Love you Zhan."
She smiled up at him with genuine happiness and pride shining in her tired but loving brown eyes. For just a brief moment, all the pain and suffering seemed to fade away completely, leaving only a mother's pure, unconditional love.
"L-love you too Mom..."
He chuckled softly through his tears of joy and gratitude, and for the first time in many months, he felt a tiny spark of genuine happiness flickering in his chest. His mother's endless love was the only thing that kept him alive each day.
He sat down in the rickety wooden chair across from his mother and stared at the beautiful cake she had somehow managed to afford. The candles flickered and danced in the dim light, casting warm, golden shadows on the cracked and peeling walls.
It was the cake that his mother had sold her dignity and body to complete strangers to buy. She had endured shame, humiliation, and self-hatred just so she could give him this one small moment of birthday joy.
He hesitated for a long, painful moment, knowing exactly what terrible things she had done to get the money for this simple cake. The thought of her sacrifice made his stomach turn and his heart ache with overwhelming guilt.
"Don't worry Zhan."
Her voice was gentle, encouraging, and full of love, giving him the permission and strength he needed to accept her precious gift. She wanted him to be happy and celebrate, even if it was just for a few fleeting minutes.
Zhan didn't hesitate anymore and took a bite from the piece of cake she had carefully cut for him with shaking hands. The rich, sweet chocolate melted on his tongue, and it tasted better than anything he could remember eating in his entire life.
"I-I haven't tasted anything this good in so long..."
He looked down at the cracked linoleum floor as his voice started to break again with overwhelming emotion. It had been many long, hungry months since they had been able to afford anything sweet, special, or celebratory like this.
"Mom..."
He couldn't find the right words to express the complex mixture of gratitude, guilt, love, and heartbreak that was flooding through his mind and soul. His mother had sacrificed everything she had left for him, and he felt unworthy of such pure love.
"Like I told ya, I care for you."
She reached across the small, wobbly table and took his trembling hand gently in both of hers. Her skin was rough and calloused from years of hard work and hardship, but her touch was still infinitely gentle and loving.
He just couldn't handle all the overwhelming emotions that were crashing through his heart and mind like a violent tsunami. Love, gratitude, guilt, sadness, hope, and despair all mixed together in a chaotic storm that threatened to drown him completely.
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Both Zhan and his mother had gone to sleep already, feeling more content and at peace than they had experienced in a very long time. The small birthday celebration had brought them closer together and reminded them both of their unbreakable bond.
Moreover, it had made him genuinely happy to see his mother smile and laugh again, even if it was just for a brief, precious moment. Her happiness and well-being were more important to him than anything else in the entire world or universe.
After all, the other days in their miserable lives were much worse and more painful than this one had been. Today had been like a miracle, a small ray of sunshine breaking through the endless storm clouds that surrounded them.
Yet, somehow he still lived and breathed and found the strength to continue existing despite everything that tried to break him down. He didn't understand where that inner strength came from, but he was grateful that it still existed somewhere deep inside him.
But how long could he realistically keep this up before he finally reached his absolute breaking point? How much more pain, suffering, and heartbreak could one person endure before their spirit was completely and utterly destroyed forever?
"Guh... What is this smell..."
He groaned as he slowly opened his heavy, tired eyes, immediately confused and alarmed by the strange, sharp smell that was filling his nostrils. It was acrid, burning, and chemical, making his eyes water and his throat feel scratchy and raw.
—I'll go check on mother...
He muttered anxiously in his racing thoughts as he sat up quickly in his small bed. Something felt very wrong and dangerous, and a growing sense of dread and panic was building in the pit of his stomach.
He stood up as fast as his weak body would allow and rushed to his bedroom door with growing alarm. His bare feet slapped against the cold wooden floor as his heart began racing with fear and worry.
He opened the door and was immediately hit by a massive wave of intense, suffocating heat and thick, choking black smoke. The narrow hallway was completely filled with a gray, toxic haze that made it almost impossible to see or breathe.
A terrifying mix of bright red and yellow flames was dancing wildly along the walls and ceiling of their small house. The fire was spreading quickly and hungrily, consuming everything in its destructive path like a living monster.
Fire. Their entire house was engulfed in flames, and he had no idea how it had started or how long it had been burning while they slept peacefully. The heat was so intense that it felt like his skin might melt right off his bones.
"W-WHAT..!?"
He exclaimed in complete shock, terror, and disbelief, his voice barely audible over the loud roaring and violent crackling of the rapidly spreading fire. The smoke was so thick that he could barely see his own hands in front of his face.
"MOM! MOM!"
He banged desperately on his mother's bedroom door with both fists, rushing blindly through the dangerous flames and choking smoke that blocked his path. The wooden door was already burning hot to the touch, and he could feel the fire trying to claim him too.
Eventually, he was able to break through the door by throwing his entire body weight against it with every ounce of strength he had left. The burning wood splintered and cracked, allowing him to stumble into the smoke-filled room that had become a death trap.
But what he saw inside was the most horrible, heartbreaking, and nightmarish thing he could ever imagine in his worst fears. His beloved mother was trapped and crushed under a massive piece of burning debris that had fallen from the collapsed ceiling above.
"M-MOM... MOM!"
Zhan's mother had been completely crushed under the heavy, burning rubble, with only her head and one trembling arm visible and sticking out from underneath the concrete and wooden beams. Blood was trickling steadily from her mouth and nose, staining her pale face red.
"Zhan..."
She groaned weakly through gritted teeth, extending her free hand toward him with what little strength she had left. Her voice was barely a whisper, and he could see the precious life slowly fading from her once-bright brown eyes.
"MOM!!!"
He rushed through the thick, poisonous smoke and grabbed her outstretched hand tightly in both of his shaking hands. Her skin felt cold and clammy despite the intense heat, and he could feel her pulse getting weaker and more irregular with each passing second.
He tried desperately to lift the massive piece of burning roof and concrete that had crushed his mother's fragile body beneath its terrible weight. His muscles strained and burned with the impossible effort, and his hands quickly became bloody and torn from trying to grip the jagged debris.
But there was absolutely no luck at all. The heavy piece of rubble was far too massive and impossible for him to move by himself, and there was nobody else in the world who would come to help them save each other.
"Zhan. Run... Survive!"
She groaned through clenched teeth as tears streamed down her dirt and blood-covered face. She knew with certainty that she was dying, but her only concern was making sure that her precious son would live and escape this terrible fate.
"MOM! DONT FUCKING SAY THAT! YOU'RE COMING WITH ME, ALIVE!!!"
He screamed at the top of his lungs as he continued desperately trying to lift the impossible weight with every fiber of his being. His voice was becoming hoarse and raw from the toxic smoke, but he absolutely refused to give up on saving her life.
"ZHAN! I LOVE YOU, SO PLEASE, LIVE! PLEASE..."
This was the first and only time in his entire life that she had ever raised her voice at him in anger, but it came from a place of pure, desperate, unconditional love. She wanted him to save himself, even if it meant leaving her behind to die alone in agony.
"Mom..."
He stopped his futile efforts to move the debris and looked directly into her dying eyes with complete heartbreak. He could see that she was completely serious, and that she was rapidly running out of time and life.
"No matter where I am... Heaven, hell or earth... I'll always be there for you..."
Her voice grew weaker and fainter with each precious word, but she managed to get out her final, most important message to him. She wanted him to know that her love would never die, even when her body did.
"..."
He couldn't cry anymore because all his tears had been completely used up over the years of suffering. He felt totally empty, numb, and broken inside, like his soul had been ripped out of his chest and destroyed.
Before he even noticed what was happening, another massive piece of burning rubble came crashing down from the collapsing ceiling above them. It landed directly on top of his mother with a sickening, crushing sound that would haunt him forever.
*CRUNCH.*
Her esophagus flipped inside out, insides rushing out, her eyeballs exploded.
She died instantly, her fragile body completely crushed and broken under the terrible weight of the debris. Her hand went limp and lifeless in his, and her beautiful brown eyes lost forever, never to be seen again.
"MOOOOMMM—"
And before he could say anything else or even process what had just happened to the only person who had ever loved him, a massive burning beam from the ceiling came crashing down directly onto his head. His vision went completely black as consciousness left his broken body forever.
Zhan Welson had died at the young age of seventeen, his short, pathetic life finally ended by the same cruel fate that had claimed his mother. His miserable existence had come to a tragic, meaningless end in the flames that consumed everything he had ever known or loved.