Nox's POV:
So apparently, I messed up. I was worried someone would somehow notice a discrepancy in my fake license and wanted a real one, which was why I outed myself as an expert on magical beasts to the cops. I was going to swipe the license for my new persona going forwards before bolting, but …
"It would be such a shame if the name John Doe were to appear on the tamer's guild's wanted list for dealing with magical beasts without the prerequisite knowledge! Anyone who is found carrying a license with such a unique name would be immediately arrested!"
Yeah, maybe I shouldn't have bragged so much. If only I had broken our deal and lied about who the expert was, damn my righteous heart of infinite wisdom. Oh well, at least this way I won't suddenly find myself on another list one day because a salty old geezer revoked my license after he realized he had been bamboozled. I've already got one bounty on my head, no need to get another if I can help it.
The test I agreed to take was a written exam on various magical beast's native to this continent. Good thing I have been secretly 'collecting' books on that subject for 'charity' while doing my market research. Once I finished memorizing the content I didn't already know, me being the environmentally friendly businesswoman that I am decided to recycle the books into the charity soup kitchen I was running. So, many hungry bellies were filled with just one or two rounds of my book-fueled cooking that I never saw another starving homeless person I could overcharge again. And all it took was some monster eggs and a crap load of burnable books.
"Candidate John Doe! If you could please remove those bandages!" Evaluator glasses-kun said as I sat down at my desk.
For some stupid reason I have to show my face to take this dumb test as well, they were probably afraid I was some sort of criminal and wanted to confirm my identity. What kind of scoundrel do they take me for. Anyways, I swapped the cheat sheet disguised as bandages with my water mask. That way they can see my face with no problem.
"You have 1 hour to finish the test! You may now begin!"
I immediately pushed the brush aside and poured the entire ink bottle over the paper and used spirit magic to write the answers to the test, finishing it in record time.
"Candidate Doe, is something the matter? Are you giving up on passing the-!"
"Done! Here you go!" I said before submitting my exam paper in under 30 seconds.
"How did you write all this? You didn't even use a brush!" Glasses-kun said, obviously in awe of my excellent answers.
Feeling good about getting this whole thing over with, I walked out the door of the exam room as I could hear glasses-kun begging me not to leave him behind, but alas in the whole 30 seconds that I have known him, I know he will do just fine without me. Farewell, glasses-kun, may we meet in the next life.
Anyways, after the tearful farewell with a stranger, I headed towards the exit when I ran into captain fur-beard who I spotted eating a sandwich while reading a paper.
"Okay, I'm done! Hey, fur-beard you better keep your word or you're not going to like what I do next!" I said, feeling the fanfiction brewing in my guts.
"Huh? Fur-beard? Wait, you finished? You only left 10 minutes ago!" He said, before taking a bit out of his non-beast egg sandwich.
"Well, it was a basic test to verify my general knowledge of magical beasts! Any relatively knowledgeable person would be able to finish it early! Anyways, I'll be going now! Bye!" I said as I was about to walk past him, but of course …
"And where do you think you are going?" Fur-beard said as he grabbed my shoulder.
If my life was ever this easy, I wouldn't have needed to take that stupid test in the first place.
"I took the stupid test, so where I go is none of your business!"
"We still need to wait for the results! And besides, even if you passed it doesn't prove the scroll on the butterfly spider is correct! I still need to-!"
"Oh, hell no! You only said I needed to take one test! I am not going bug catching with you over some dumb license! So, get your paws off me!" I said as I slapped his hand off my shoulder.
While I was there, I took the liberty of going on a scavenger hunt for the local beasts and plant life around my daughter's action figure training camp. I was lucky enough to find a fully grown butterfly spider I could dissect and experiment on. Using what I learned and what I know from similar types of magical beasts I have studied in the past, I am now probably the biggest expert on that potential species of kaiju, which is why I know it's going to take forever to find another one.
There is no way in hell I am wasting another minute on this license business. I would rather risk it with my counterfeits than spend another day trying to go legit over such an unprofitable profession. I spent over a week trying to get rid of those eggs, but whether it was as a pet or a snack, I only managed to sell three or four of the little turds. The only upside is that I managed to scam fur-beard into paying for them after the tunnel incident.
If I ever get involved with the animal market again it will be too soon.
"WAIT! CANDIDATE JOHN DOE! WE HAVE YOUR TEST RESULTS!" Glasses-kun screamed, waving my test score in the air as he came running towards us.
*sigh*
I might as well rub my test score in fur-beards face before I go.
"Read it and weep, fur-beard!" I said as I swiped the papers out of glasses-kun's hand and slapped it into the captain's face.
"100 POINTS! HOW?"
A perfect score. Though I wasn't sure why he looked so surprised, I am satisfied, nonetheless.
"Okey dokey! Time to skedaddle! Hey! What's the big idea?" I said as he used his spatial movement to teleport in front of me.
"Did you cheat?" He said, insulting glasses-kun's honor.
Does he think those glasses are just for show. I bet he sees all sorts of hidden truths with those cosmic lenses of his.
"What? Of course not! How could I cheat with glasses-kun over there staring at me the entire time? Right, glasses-kun?"
"Are you referring to me?" Glasses-kun asked in a confused tone that I am sure was sarcastic.
"Take it again!" Fur-beard said.
"Excuse you!"
"Take it again!" He said as he pulled out another copy of the test from his spatial ring.
"Are you out of your furry mind? I'm not-!"
*BOOM*
"Take it again!" He said, after exploding with elemental energy.
"Fine! Geez! What rabies-infested animal crawled up your ass this morning?" I said, a little exasperated at how much this sore loser was after seeing my test score.
I then proceeded to pour the ink onto the paper like I did before, only this time I had an old itchy beard breathing down my neck. He seemed a little surprised upon witnessing my spirit magic, but at least he wasn't pestering me about that like he has about everything else.
"There I'm done now bye! Whoa!"
Just as I stood up the guy grabbed me and teleported me somewhere else. I should really make some anti-teleportation talismans or something. This spatial kidnapping thing is getting old.
"Hey, let go! HELP! I'M BEING KIDNAPPED! THIS OLD MAN IS NOT MY GRANDPA! HEL-! *Muffled shouting*"
As I tried to gather another crowd to slander this old pirate to fanfiction hell, I was suddenly silenced by an old wrinkly hand as he dragged me into a building.
"Eww! Did you just lick my hand? Are you a dog or something?"
"HELP! I-! *Muffled*"
"Hey! Ouch! Are you biting me! Ouch! How does a mortal have such jaw strength! Ouch! Damn it! GET BACK HERE!"
It seemed human teeth wasn't going to cut it for this old man, so I swapped my dentures for shark teeth and really got to chewing. He finally flinched and loosened his grip after I chewed off a third of his hand. Once freed, I bolted down the hallway as I started screaming about the tale of Darsh the butt-predator with an egg allergy.
"HELP! ELDER DARSH WANTS TO PLAY WITH MY BUTT! QUICKLY! SOMEONE GIVE ME AN EGG TO WARD HIM OFF!"
*Pop*
Suddenly, popping out through a spatial distortion right ahead of me was the aforementioned butt-predator, trying to silence me before I spread the knowledge of his only weakness to the whole world.
"Got yo-! Ugh!"
Just as he tried to grab me, I jumped over his arms and used his head as a springboard as I leaped further down the hall.
"HE SHOVED A SQUIRREL UP HIS AS AND CONTRACTED RABIES! HELP!"
After about 10 minutes of a little game I call dodge and slander, fur-beard went from capture to kill as he started hurling spatial slashes and punches in my direction. Fortunately, with my sixth senses and combat instincts, I could dodge them blindfolded which I did cause I wanted to piss him off for making me redo my final exam after graduation.
"COME BACK HERE YOU LITTLE LIER!"
"NYAH, NYAH-NYAH, NYAH, NYAH! YOU CAN'T CATCH ME!" I taunted before turning my body to run backwards so I could stick my tongue out at the old man chasing after me.
*Bang*
*thud*
"WHO IS MAKING ALL THAT-?"
Unfortunately, it seems someone else wanted to get in on the fun and caught me off guard as I slammed back-first into an opening door.
"Outh! I Bith my phunge! (Ouch! I bit my tongue!)" I said as I watched my severed tongue plop on to the floor.
If only I had listened to the old saying 'don't go running with shark teeth'.
"-RACKET?"
"Ha! I got you now! Whoa!"
*Crash*
Just as I watched the fur-beard close the distance I kicked my severed tongue right under his foot, before sidestepping the old man as he slipped past me and into the greenish-grey-haired baby-face who had opened the door in the first place.
"Ugh! Darsh?" The baby-face said in confusion upon seeing who had tackled him to the floor.
*click*
"Who-! GUILD MASTER AARAV?!"
*click*
"GET OFF OF ME YOU FOOL!" The red-faced baby-face shouted at the rabid old pirate
*click*
"Y-YES SIR!"
"Darsh! What on earth is all this ruckus about? And who is that young man?" Baby-face asked as he finally noticed me taking pictures with my crystal ball camera.
"*whistle* With a bit of editing, these will be perfect for my next erotic novel, or maybe I should make it a picture book!" I said to myself as I pondered if I could somehow trip them into kissing next.
*Swoosh*
"GIVE ME THAT!" Fur-beard screamed as he tried to swipe my material for his own picture book, I'm sure.
"Help! Guild master! Elder Darsh is assaulting me!" I said, as I clung on to the guild master.
"What?"
"YOU! GET OFF OF THE GUILD MASTER!" He said as he lunged at me.
This was my chance. I swiftly pulled the guild master in front of me intending to use him as a meat shield. I had my camera ready as I had managed to position the staggered baby-face in just the right position to receive fur-beard's flying kiss. Unfortunately, my plans were foiled by fur-beards last second teleport. I got some suggestive shots though. If I do a bit of editing, I could make it look like they're kissing. Anyways, before fur-beard could pop out the door next to me, I swapped out my camera. And as expected, moments later, …
*slam*
*swoosh*
*Smash*
"Aww man! You destroyed my camera! You better pay for a new one!" I said, doing some half-assed acting, except for the thing about replacing the camera, that was real. I should bring some props next time. It would save me a fortune in decoys.
"CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT IN THE WORLD IS GOING ON!"
"*huff* Apologies guild master! This is-!"
"Hi, I'm John Doe, the poor victim of this butt-! *muffled*" I was silenced by the butt-predator's poopy hand once more, as I tried to reveal his sinful behavior to the almighty baby-face.
"*sigh* This slandering maniac is the newest person to pass the elder's exam with a perfect score!"
"Hm? Perfect you say? He seems to be rather young to have attained that level of knowledge! Are you certain of this Darsh?"
"Yes! Unfortunately, I am! I watched him fill out the test directly, with spirit magic no less!"
"Oh! So, he also has a contracted spirit as well! How peculiar! And you made sure to monitor any signs of the little fairy sneaking a peek at the answers I presume?"
"Yes, Sir! Ouch!"
Tired of being ignored in a conversation about me, I bit the gross hand of captain fur-beard so he would get it out of my face.
"Why are you guys going on about that dumb test?"
"Dumb?"
"Hehe! You seem rather arrogant, though I suppose that is part of being young! *giggle*" The baby-face chuckled to himself, like the crazy old man he really is.
"Anyways, can I go now?" I asked, getting really sick of running into old people disguised as teenagers.
"Hehe! I am afraid you have one final trial you must overcome before passing the test!"
"Come on! It has been like this all day! *sigh* Fine, whatever! But if you guys suddenly ask me to do one last thing one more time, I'm spreading my fanfiction to the world!" I said, while already cooking up a plan to spread my fanfiction across the continent.
"…!"
*giggle*
Captain fur-beard looked a bit uncomfortable, while looking back and forth between me and the geezer in disguise. Meanwhile, baby-face just shrugged me off with a chuckle.
"So, much energy this generation has! Let's hope it will be enough! Now if you would follow me to the trial room!" Baby-face said before walking off somewhere.
"So, what's this new test going to be about? Diet? Evolution? Anatomy? … Reproduction?" I asked as I followed along
"*Giggle* You mean Mr. Darsh hasn't told you yet?"
"He threatened to put a bounty on my head if I didn't pass some basic test!"
"Oh, is that so?" Baby-face said as he gave a squinty glare at fur-beard trailing awkwardly behind us.
"I-It is not what you think! He had been selling beast eggs without a license!" Fur-beard said in a fluster.
"Dude! Not cool man! Nobody likes a narc!"
"Hahaha! So, it is true then! Young man, if you passed that test, then you have the knowledge to pass the license examination! Why not just do so in the first place?"
"Because all the animals in the practical were too wimpy! Kind of hard to tame something when it passes out at the sight of you!"
"Is that so? Then you should have no trouble with this trial!"
"So, let me guess! The test I'm supposed to take is behind that big ominous looking door?" I said, pointing at a pair of metal double doors with a cool looking four-armed elephant-human chimera printed on it.
"Indeed, it is!
Behind the ominous doors was some weirdly familiar dark space. There were no walls, no roof and no floor. Just a giant floating thermometer.
"I wonder?"
"Feeling hesitant?" I heard baby-face ask as I hopped in.
"I thought so! There is no gravity in this room! Weeee!" I said as I did a bunch of backflips while floating in the dark space.
"You seem rather at ease for someone who is here for the first time!" Baby-face said, as he entered after me.
"Well, it's not my first time in an imaginary space! Hey, what's the thermostat for exactly?"
"Hm? Not your first time? It doesn't matter! That device is a tool that can only exist inside this space! It will measure a person's capabilities and create an illusory beast specifically tailored to that individual! Your trial will be to tame your inner beast within this realm of boundless possibilities!"
"So, basically, I just plop my hand on this pedestal and make whatever pops out heel! Okey doke!" I said as I high-fived the pedestal in front of the thermostat.
"Well, yeah, but even if it is an illusion, it can still kill you inside this space!" Fur-beard chimed in.
"So, what does the different lines mean exactly?" I asked, as I watched the thermostat rise.
"They indicate the rank of the beast you will. Be. Taming…!" Baby-face seemed to trail off as he looked at the steadily rising line in the thermostat.
"Guild master? Why isn't it stopping?" Fur-beard asked baby-face.
"…"
"Hey, you said it measures me, but what exactly does it use as a basis for that?" I asked.
"…"
"Guild master? Is the machine broken? It's not stopping!"
"…"
"Hello! I asked you guys a question!" I said, but the fur-beard kept ignoring me and the baby-face just stared silently at the thermostat as it filled up.
"Guild master! Hey!"
"…"
"Never mind! I think I just figured it out!" I said, as I could feel my private info being peeked at by this pervy rectal thermometer.
"AARAV!!!"
"Huh?"
Trying to get his boss's attention, fur-beard tried calling out to baby-face, but it wasn't until he screamed in his ears that baby-face finally snapped back to the reality that was in this imaginary plane.
"The device must have broken! We need to get out of here! Hey, youngster! Take your hand off the-!"
"NO! If he takes his hand of now, it will just summon it prematurely!"
"What? But if he waits any longer it will just make the summon creature stronger, won't it?"
"…"
"We need to get out of here!"
"…"
"Why are you just standing there! Say something! Or better yet, help me get these doors open!"
"They can only be opened once the trial has ended!"
"WHAT?"
"Darsh! Haven't you ever wondered what's at the top?"
"Now's not the time for daydreams! It has already reached mythical! It could go off any second!"
"What is the strongest magical beast this place can produce? We limit our understanding of a beast's power to the conventional ranking systems we can find in the real world, but what if there was a creature even beyond that?"
"WHAT ARE YOU EVEN TALKING ABOUT AT A TIME LIKE THIS! CAN'T YOU SEE THAT THE SPHERE AT THE TOP IS BEGINNING TO FILL UP!"
"The limit of an imaginary space is not bound by the laws of reality! It is not governed by the laws of physics, the rules of magic or the teachings of dao! Its only limitation is our ability to control it through the anchor to reality which we used to enter it! But right now, during this trial, that anchor is temporarily severed to remove such limitations!"
"YOU CAN'T BE SERIOUS!"
"That device may use our ranking system as a basis for the measurements, but it is not limited by them! It is only limited by the power of this plane of existence, which means the power of a creature that is created from a full gauge will possess the immeasurable power of this realm, not governed by any natural laws that we know of or comprehend for that matter. I don't know why this trial is malfunctioning now, but does it matter? We are about to witness the ultimate being, born from the void! What form will it take? What abilities will it have? I can't even imagine it! It will surpass anything that could exist in reality, making it the strongest beast, no, the strongest entity to ever be witnessed! And we are the lucky few who get to witness its birth! I can't think of a higher honor! It is the peak beyond the pinnacle! The supreme beast! Don't you want to see it with your own two eyes?"
"Sure I do! But I would also like to keep living afterward, so help me come up with a… Solution? Until the trial ends?"
"I know what you are thinking fur-beard, and it won't work!"
"…"
"You're thinking of killing me to end the trial! But I got some bad news for you!" I said as I could feel him getting ready to attack.
*BOOM*
Fortunately, the suicidal baby-faces fanatic blocked the attack of the rabid pirate.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING! WE NEED TO END THE TRIAL BEFORE THE MEASURING DEVICE FILLS COMPLETALY!"
"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND! AS A TAMER, HOW CAN YOU RESIST SEEING THE ULTIMATE BEAST THAT SURPASSES THE IMAGINATION!"
"Sorry, to burst your bubble captain fur-beard, but with the anchor gone, it seems the trial won't end until all of us are dead or the beast is subdued!"
"HOW WOULD YOU KNOW? YOUR JUST A MORTAL!"
"A mortal who has experienced controlling an imaginary space! Which is why I also know the only way out other than the preset conditions once the anchor has been sealed away!"
"What?"
"An imaginary space is a stable vacuum of sorts! It hates it when laws of reality, energy, matter or pretty much anything exists within it! Which is why, when you create too much of something within it! It will become unstable and any restrictions like the walls separating this imaginary space from reality will start to crack, meaning we don't need to pass through the reality anchor itself to leave this space!"
"What?"
"In short! Full gauge equals exit! Assuming we don't all die first, that is!"
"…"
"How do you know all this stuff?"
"Because I do my homework! Oh, looks like it's starting! Let's see what the supreme big boy of dreams got for us!" I said as I watched my inner beast unleashed.
The black void was absorbed into a single point, turning out surroundings into a cracked white void instead. Then as the thermometer crumbled away, the gauge inside it changed its color from red to blue, before slithering its way towards the black dot, enveloping it as it compressed itself into, a tiny blue energy snake the size of my pinky.
"Well, that was a little anti-climactic! Why is it so tiny!"
"It's actually kind of cute?" Fur-beard said as he looked at the little serpent rattling its tale in excitement.
"…"
"Sit!" I ordered, and it stretched out its tail into the shape of a chair before sitting on it.
"Roll!" I ordered, and it, pit its tail and turned itself into a wheel as it started racing around the place.
"Shake!" I ordered, and it suddenly grew a human shaped hand and gave me a handshake.
*creak*
"Hey, the doors are opening! We can lea-!"
"Destroy the world!" I ordered, and suddenly the entire space exploded into the color blue, destroying the crumbling imaginary space in an instant, causing a similar situation to how I escaped my last imaginary space.
The world twisted and distorted as we were turned in every which direction before being pooped back into reality.