The Qin Family Ancestral Hall buzzed with the weight of centuries-old drama. Rows upon rows of ancestral tablets stared judgmentally at the current lineup of Qin bigwigs. At the center sat the **First Ancestor**—a man with a beard so long it could double as a ladder—flanked by nine other elders who looked like they'd been pickled in seriousness. Qin Tian, the family's current head (and resident *"Disappointing Dad"*), stood stiffly behind them, sweating bullets.
"First Ancestor," Qin Tian began, bowing so low his nose almost scraped the floor, "the Imperial Xia Clan is coming for us. War is inevitable."
The First Ancestor stroked his beard like it owed him money. "Then we fight. Let them taste the wrath of—"
**"WAIT!"**
A tiny figure burst into the hall, tripping over his own robes. It was **Qin Feng**, the family's eight-year-old chaos gremlin, whose hobbies included trolling his brother and inventing new ways to give his father heart attacks.
"Feng! Out!" Qin Tian hissed, but the First Ancestor raised a hand, his eyes twinkling like a grandpa spotting cookies.
"Let the child speak," he said, ignoring Qin Tian's pout. "Qin Feng, why shouldn't we fight?"
Qin Feng straightened up, channeling his inner TED Talk host. "Only *idiots* start wars! Win, and we're exhausted. Lose, and we're extinct. Let's outsmart them instead!"
The elders gasped. Qin Tian facepalmed. *"Idiots"?!* Since when did his son learn vocabulary that spicy?
"Go on," the First Ancestor urged, leaning forward like this was the juiciest episode of *"Qin Family Drama: Ancient Edition."*
Qin Feng whipped out a dusty scroll titled **"How to Cheat at Cultivation: For Dummies."** "The Xia Clan's scared because Little Brother Qin Hao has **Supreme Bone™** and I've got **Emperor Potential™**. So let's *hide* us! But not in a boring way—let's make it *spectacular*!"
He paused for effect, then dropped the bomb: **"We'll dig out Qin Hao's bone!"**
The room erupted. Elders clutched their chests. One fainted. Another spat out his immortality tea.
"ARE YOU MAD?!" Qin Tian screeched. "He's FIVE! He still thinks *nap time* is a human right!"
But Qin Feng wasn't done. "It's not just about the bone! There's a *method*!" He flipped to a page titled **"How to Trauma-Dump Your Way to Godhood."** "See? You yank the bone, let him suffer *tragic backstory juice*, and bam! He becomes an OP protagonist!"
The First Ancestor's beard quivered with excitement. "Brilliant! The Heavens *love* a good sob story!"
"BUT—!" Qin Tian tried again, but Qin Feng steamrolled him.
"Wait, there's more! *I'll* play the villain!" He struck a pose, imaginary cape fluttering. "I'll 'steal' Hao's bone, get banished, and the family can act all *'Oh no, he's a monster! Someone chase him!'* Meanwhile, I'll be vibing in exile, dodging assassins, and collecting rare loot!"
The elders blinked. This kid had more layers than a cursed onion.
"NO!" Qin Tian wailed. "You'll die! Or worse—get a *bad reputation*!"
Qin Feng patted his dad's shoulder. "Relax, Dad. I've got plot armor thicker than Ancestor's beard. Besides, suffering builds character! Remember: *'A sword isn't sharp without grinding, and a hero isn't cool without trauma!'*"
The First Ancestor wiped a tear. "Such wisdom… from a child who still wets his bed…"
"I do NOT—" Qin Feng started, but the First Ancestor cut him off.
"Approved! Let the *'Qin Family Scandal Arc'* begin!"
Qin Tian slumped, muttering, "Why'd I teach him to read…?"
Meanwhile, Qin Feng mentally high-fived himself. *Finally!* No more bedtime stories about "responsibility"! Time to explore the world, find some OP artifacts, and maybe flirt with a demoness or three. Who needs family drama when you've got *main character energy*?
As the elders debated which curse to put on his "wanted" poster, Qin Feng grinned. This was gonna be *epic*.