"Who!"
Feeling the slight pain on his head and a pile of building blocks on the floor, Fugaku jumped up at once, and even his Sharingan appeared.
"Damn it! Don't let me find out who did this!"
"You woke my son — I'll tear you apart!"
In Fugaku's mind, this had to be some jealous person playing a prank on him because he had a son.
He originally wanted to run around the house to see who it was, but suddenly Itachi's crying drew him in.
At that, Fugaku couldn't bother hunting for the culprit any longer and hurried off to soothe his son.
Gekko Chizan watched this scene and laughed so hard he could hardly contain himself.
[Ding! Detected the host using the Telescope Technique combined with the Flying Thunder God Technique to prank Uchiha Fugaku. Special reward: physique +1.]
[Ding! You messed with a brand-new dad — that is seriously... awesome!]
[Keep it up! Host, continue your good work.]
Listening to the system's utterly lecherous voice, Gekko Chizan couldn't help but grin.
So that's it — the reason he's gotten this rotten is all the system's doing, not his own will, tsk tsk.
With the chakra from the crystal ball withdrawn, he prepared to switch targets. This time his target would be Minato Namikaze.
If he remembered correctly, Minato's chakra nature included Fire, Wind, and Lightning...
Right, he input the three types of chakra into the crystal ball.
Wow — Minato's big face appeared before Gekko Chizan, but the scene?
Huh? That red-haired woman beside him...
Oh? Is Minato on a date with Kushina? Or is this at his own home?
Watching Kushina cooking, Minato looked so blissfully happy.
"Where was Minato's house again..."
"Wasn't it around the Hokage building?"
Gekko Chizan flashed away from home again; he was hunting — hunting for Minato's house...
He was, after all, the living map of Konoha; back when he wanted to increase his attributes, he had memorized the whole village.
He quickly found Minato's home, used Transparent Release to perch on the window and peeked in — yep, it was Minato and Kushina.
He chuckled, placed one hand on Minato's house wall, and left the seal of his technique there.
Back at home, Gekko Chizan looked at the crystal ball and began plotting how to mess with Minato...
He had to be careful with Minato — after all, they both used the Flying Thunder God technique; he might be easily exposed...
But he soon thought of a neat trick.
"Bang!"
A shadow clone appeared. Gekko Chizan looked at the several clones before him and immediately activated a disguise jutsu.
Uchiha Fugaku, Third Hokage, Jiraiya.
One by one, the clones were sent to Minato's door.
Clone No. 1, Uchiha Fugaku, knocked on Minato's door.
Minato hurriedly opened it.
"Oh? Fugaku, do you need something?"
Minato didn't invite Fugaku in — after all, he was on a date with Kushina, and Kushina was still cooking.
He didn't want anyone interrupting their time together.
"Minato, what's the matter? Not welcoming me?"
"Should I leave then?"
Clone Fugaku fully embodied the Uchiha's tsundere pride, leaving Minato awkward-faced.
"Well, Fugaku, I'm not feeling well today. How about next time — next time I'll take you out for barbecue, okay?"
Oh? This blond-haired guy is lying with his eyes open — not even a blush. Quite a performer!
Watching Minato through the crystal ball, Gekko Chizan's eyes widened; he really hadn't expected Minato to speak so freely.
Tsk tsk, but the Telescope Technique shows the truth.
"Hmph, Minato, we're comrades. If you act like that, want to see if I'll tell Mikoto about this?"
"I'm just here to borrow something."
"I've run out of salt and sugar at home and the shops are closed. Lend me some — I need to go back and make something tasty for Itachi."
How are books of anecdotes made? People make them up. Gekko Chizan's nonsense was even wilder than Minato's!
Hearing Fugaku's request, Minato didn't hesitate and said:
"Wait a second."
He quickly returned to the room, grabbed a jar of salt and a jar of sugar from beside Kushina, and dashed back.
"Hey, Minato, if you take the salt, how am I supposed to season the food?"
"It's fine, Kushina. Lately I've been feeling overheated and prefer bland food — no salt is okay!"
In order to preserve his private moment, Minato dashed back to the door, opened it, shoved the salt and sugar into Fugaku's hands, and left with,
"Here, keep them. No need to return — sometime I'll treat you to a meal!"
"Slap!"
The door closed. Gekko Chizan laughed until he was out of breath.
Cooking without salt — Minato, you really did it!
[Ding! Detected the host using clone technique to pilfer a jar of salt and a jar of sugar from Minato Namikaze's home — truly a petty thief! Bonus reward: 500 ryō!]
What the — 500 ryō? Seriously?
[Ding! The salt and sugar in the host's hands are worth 50 ryō total! Their value has been multiplied by tenfold! What else do you want?]
Screw it — being able to prank Minato was fun, so 500 ryō it is.
Clone No.1 mission complete; the Flying Thunder God returned him and then the clone dissipated into smoke.
Clone No.2 deployed! The Third Hokage Hiruzen Sarutobi.
Wearing the Hokage robe, chewing on a pipe, smiling broadly, Hiruzen Sarutobi headed for Minato's house.
He knocked and waited for Minato to answer.
Minato, who'd just seen Fugaku off and had only just relaxed, hadn't even warmed the chair when the door was knocked again.
This drove Minato almost mad.
No one ever came to his place — why were there so many people today?
Who was it, interrupting him at this hour!
Suppressing his irritation, he went to the door and opened it, only to be stunned.
"Uh, Lord Hokage, is there something you need?"
"Heh heh heh, Minato, why not invite me in for a seat?"
Minato felt awkward. Under normal circumstances he'd certainly invite the Hokage in, but not today.
Today he was on a date with Kushina! He'd even lit candles and everything.
Just waiting for Kushina to finish cooking, and they would have a warm candlelit dinner!
Taking a deep breath, he planned to tell the truth — after all, tricking Fugaku earlier had made his conscience uneasy.
But who knew Hiruzen's next few words would leave him even more bewildered.
"Not letting this old man in — I'm telling you, if you mess around behind Kushina's back, I'll beat you up."
"Have you forgotten Mito-sama's words? You must treat Kushina well!"
"No, I have to come in and check. I have to look after Kushina for her."
Saying that, Hiruzen stepped inside the house with a sidestep.
Seeing Kushina unsure how to proceed without salt, Gekko Chizan laughed again.
"Oh, Minato, not bad — going as far as a candlelit dinner, huh."