"Why did you take off your watch yesterday? Emerald said he had no data from it for three hours," Theo asked, standing near him in the garden with a shovel.
Looking at the soil stains on his hands, he didn't wait long to respond. "I must've taken it off while working with the pots."
Le An was digging the ground to plant a seed he had recently discovered, a spring flower. The little seedling was too delicate, barely the size of his palm. It will be the kind of bloom that would only grow in spring, when the earth has just shaken off the cold days. There was a faint trace of purple on the flower, Le An couldn't help but feel excited about what it might become. Maybe something tender and ephemeral, yet strikingly bold?
Once it grew a little stronger, he planned to bring it inside in a pot and keep it in his room. Watching the quiet joy on Le An's face, Theo smiled and asked, "You really like this seedling, huh?"
"I do," Le An replied. "I hadn't ordered an endemic flower in a long time. They told me this one might actually have a chance in my garden with the right care."
Theo gave a small nod, but soon returned to their previous conversation.
"You were up really late. The outside guards told me your lights were on until 3 a.m."
When he regained consciousness, it was already 3 a.m. Right after that, he put his watch back on and went back to sleep. Faced with too many questions, Le An looked at Theo briefly, smiling at the way he worried.
"I'm afraid one day you'll put a camera in my room."
Theo was startled. "No, I didn't mean to— I'm just worried about you, Le An."
"I know."
He was also worried about himself, more than ever this time. Le An felt like he was fighting monsters day and night. "I know, of course. Just kidding."
Theo waited, watching him tend to the soil. "You know you can talk to me anytime. About anything, Le An."
"I know that, too."
"You could crave ice cream in the middle of the night, and everyone here would rush to get it just to see you smile. You know that, too."
"I already have everything I need. And even if I didn't, I have people like you around me—kind, caring, always. It's just that I'm speechless. Everything is happening at once."
"Are there any other problems?" Theo caught on to his words, and Le An cursed himself internally.
"No. I meant the hawks circling around me." He added quickly. And one more. The cruelest of them all.
"Everyone's working on this. Don't worry. We'll protect you no matter what," Theo said seriously.
Le An smiled at him. His heart felt warm. He knew he couldn't get through this without Theo. Theo was the best—and maybe the only—thing GAC had ever given him.
"Are we doing exposure training today?" Theo asked.
"Yes," Le An said, brushing soil from his hands. "Right after I come out of the pheromone room."
—
The room that man had seen last night was Le An's pheromone room. To protect his scent, he only released his pheromones inside it. The room was like a sealed capsule—no trace of his scent could escape. Only Theo, Le An, and a few people they had met only once had ever known what he smelled like.
Le An's heart ached every time he remembered the days he had spent inside that room during heat cycles.
It was always one of two things: painful or shameful.
Because if he couldn't endure the heat for three days, GAC would send him a partner—an alpha. And although he tried to bear it alone, Le An would eventually break.
It was a new regulation GAC had enforced eight months ago. Since then, three different alphas had been sent to him, each time when he was at his most desperate.
In the remaining months, he had rejected all three of them, never even letting them into the room. He endured the agony with Theo by his side, sometimes begging him for help, other times shouting at him, and then apologizing again and again.
Theo stayed with him every time he had to be with a partner, for safety. He watched Le An have sex with others without flinching once. But to both of them, it felt like a nightmare.
Theo only interfered rarely, when the alpha had to be warned to be more gentle or slower. And when one of them was about to knot without consent or lose control, Theo stopped it immediately.
After Le An reluctantly agreed to consider the next partner, since he had refused three times in a row, a devastating incident occurred. In that very bed he despised, a truth too cruel for him came to light.
The last alpha GAC sent, a month ago, was a dominant alpha. He looked clean and calm, and his scent was strong and citrusy, like fresh lemon.
On the second night of his heat, Le An remembered only fragments. The moment Theo asked him if he wanted a partner. A tall figure approaching him, and a hand rubbing his back to soothe him. And, a voice whispering:
"Do you know what happens to your partners after they leave you?"
Le An had looked into the man's eyes, confused. The expression he saw, pure disgust… It still haunted him.
"They get killed. The same day, right after they slept with you."
The man started shouting, his fingers digging into Le An's neck.
"Castell was my friend! He got killed just because he found out you were a fucking omega! He begged them! He swore he wouldn't tell anyone! You selfish bitc-"
Theo used his telekinesis to rip the alpha off of Le An. One by one, he broke his fingers. Then, with a twist, he broke his neck. The twisted fingers of that alpha were what Le An remembered most clearly. Since that day, the scent of every alpha made him nauseous. Every alpha, except Theo. He was okay with Theo's pheromones.
Le An was now staring at the spot where that man had died. It wasn't the first time he'd witnessed death. But it was the first time he'd seen someone be killed. There had been countless assassination attempts over the years, most stopped in time. But this one had left him broken, not because of the violence. But because of the truth.
His trembling hands held the memory of the price others paid just for touching him. It was the debt for being intimate with him. Death.
Outside the pheromone room, Theo waited for Le An to call him in. Le An remembered their first talk after the incident; honestly, he never once forgot that. He had asked, "Did you know?"
Theo's reply was slow, like he wished the truth could've stayed hidden. "Yes. I knew."
No other words were said. And Le An felt stupid again. How could Theo not have known? And how could he not have seen how cruel GAC truly was? There was nothing to say, nothing left to talk about. And back then, Le An hadn't even dared to react in a way that would put Theo under pressure, between their friendship and his duty.
And since then, the whole thing ended up becoming something they'd never talk about. A notification pinged Theo's watch.
After the room had been completely cleared of his scent, Le An had messaged him. "Let's start."