Bad bastard.
Bloodless and tearless, terrible, filthy, mean…! I roared, floundering my limbs in the sawdust.
—Whoops! (Give me my wheel, you bastard!)
I haven't even ridden half of it yet!
How can you just look at documents and pretend you don't care about hamsters at all, then hit them in the back of the head like this? Yes? If I had known, I would have pretended to ride moderately.
I was stupid to believe that a hamster otaku who couldn't stop would be indifferent to me even for one minute. I was the Grand Duke of the North, on top of being a jumping hamster.
Kyle even took the wheel and patrolled around the territory the next day. It was truly a frenzied affair. There are no miracles to perform in this hamster cage, and there are no quests.
"A miracle like that enemy…"
I crawled upside down the slide and sighed heavily as I slid down the slope repeatedly.
I don't want to eat well and live well in the world, but I just want to live like a human being until the day I die. As a human in the dictionary sense, please!
Anyway, time passed against my will.
It was a day of playing and eating. Riding the slide, eating walnuts, taking a nap, eating peanuts, playing flipping over in the hiding place, eating sunflower seeds, swinging, eating pistachios…
It's a cold town, so are nuts a specialty? It's a good restaurant. It's also a job to keep cracking them, but if you peel them all at once, put them in a bowl, and take them out little by little whenever you think of it…
…Insane. What am I thinking?
Is my mindset changing like a hamster now?
I began to fear that I would adapt so casually. I am a human being. I am an intelligent person!
"Cashew."
Kyle came in long after sunset.
I don't know if he came in late at night. It was hard to see the clock here, and in the winter of Blake Estate, night took up more than half of the day.
He returned to the study to examine me, but I didn't even pretend to know. I wasn't in the mood to do that.
Well, it's pretty.
Crouching between the first and second floors, I didn't even look at him, so he looked around the hamster house for a long time before returning to his bedroom.
I think he was disappointed…
Well, if you bring a wheel, I will give you a greeting.
The next day, sandwiched between the transparent passages, the hot-tempered Grand Duke of the North found the study before the sun even rose.
"I'll be back."
He said affectionately, his face close to me.
"I need to adjust your diet a little from today. I feel like the passage is getting stuck in your body more than I thought."
Wait, what are you talking about?
I crawled out of the hiding house in surprise.
But Kyle was so fast that he was already turning my bowl upside down. My bowl, which had been full of all kinds of nuts… My vessel… It was empty except for three almonds.
"I don't want to strain your joints. I've left a little bit of it, so you'll be fine until night. I'm busy preparing for the festival, so I'm going to come in late today."
—…
"…Is it too little?"
Before I could protest, the driver waiting next to him said,
"No, I don't. The mathematician says that the individual has not yet reached its growth stage, Your Grace. That's enough."
What are you talking about? Diet management? Are your eyes full of knots? It's also unfair to eat only nuts in the morning and evening!
This is the first time since school lunches that someone else makes a meal. I looked up at Kyle with a dumbfounded expression on my face, and then took a swipe at the bowl! It was full.
I can't eat what I want.
I want to eat chicken and beer. Capers on top of salmon. Chicken feet. Bunmoja tteokbokki. Pane pasta… Oily, spicy, and unhealthy, something that only Koreans can eat!
"You should get some exercise."
"Yes, Your Grace. It's not good to overdo it, but it's still better than gaining weight."
"Hmm."
Kyle nodded with a very sad expression, and placed the treadmill in my house.
Yes! That's it!
I looked up at him, my blue eyes twinkling. Today, he looked like an angel.
Whether it's a festival or a trivial matter, prepare very slowly, Your Grace. I will run only eight hundred laps, no more and no less, and get rid of this dirty hamster life.
Let's stay calm for now. As soon as you give it, if you get on the wheel, it will take it away again. I turned my head as calmly as I could, as if I didn't care at all about the wheel that had just returned to my arms.
Kyle looked at me for a long time as if he was going to die because I was so cute.
It looks like he's kissed me a hundred times with his eyes. But when someone is next to you, you know how to control yourself. He's grown a lot.
"Are you so good at handling demons?"
I could hear the conversation between the two of them as they went out.
"It's called the northern vole. The formation of magic stones in the heart is a little late, and the physical strength is weak… They can behave socially and are smarter than anything else."
"That's what it's like when you're a baby, anyway. It looks just like a hamster. No matter how you look at it, it's just… gold."
The subordinate driver turned around and pouted at me.
"It's a rat."
"A mouse."
Kyle replied coldly and slapped the knight's hand.
"Are you cross-eyed?"
"…I, Your Grace."
"That's enough. While I finish my review of the festival, bring me a small needle and thread."
"What are you going to do with that?"
"I don't know. I'm going to use it for important things, so prepare only the highest level."
"Yes…"
Kyle coughed and left the study.
"This winter was exceptionally cold…"
No way, this bastard.
You don't want to knit my clothes, do you? Don't do anything strangely homely, Grand Duke. If you don't want to see a fragile hamster grabbed by the back of the scruff.
Just imagining it made my hair stand on end, and I quickly rubbed my limbs.
Let's not think about it. Don't think about it.
I quickly got on the wheel. The best way to get rid of your thoughts is to spin a wheel. Now that you have the ropes, you can do eight hundred laps in no time.
I took a deep breath and began to move on all fours.
Rattle.
The large Ferris wheel began to move slowly.
Now, let's go with the flow and think about something else. I thought it was peaceful and pleasant. Pizza, hot pot bulgogi, sundae gukbap… I felt saliva pooling in my mouth and kicked the wheel with the driving force.
[0217/1000]
…
[0322/1000]
…
[0445/1000]
The numbers went up smoothly.
I'm confident that no hamster can spin a wheel better than me. Also, it's rewarding to do this, and I feel like I'm accumulating points because I can count the number of times.
I looked at the system window, which had just run between 600 and 700, with a strange sense of joy. Look, it's just now, right?
I was a little hungry, so I went down and ate something, and I remembered what Kyle and the Knight had said earlier.
What? Control your diet? Is the passage stuck in my body?
There's no way. I'll lose weight. You'll hit the ground and regret it.
I was so enthusiastic that I didn't even take a break and spun the wheel like crazy. I was worried that the screw would come off.
So when I first heard the creaking sound, I thought that this ridiculous wheel had finally fulfilled its fate.
That? But is this sound right?
"The Grand Duke hides a woman in the castle?"
"I heard that he is dying very well. He said he wears them every day."
…Woman?
"You stupid bastards. Would you hide a woman in your study? He put it in his bedroom!"
"…Is that so? Let's start here and go to the bedroom."
"That's right. Wouldn't it be nice if you were lucky enough to get a military secret?"
I stopped the wheel and looked down at the three men who had crawled in through the door, literally crawled in.
They came close to the desk in a crawling posture that could only be seen in the army, and they were wearing black masks. He didn't look like an invited guest.
"Let's either arrest or assassinate women."
"Yes, it's easier for ordinary people."
"So you hid it tightly?"
Masked men. Then, the thieves exchanged gossip among themselves and searched the drawers. Documents in the top column, documents in the next column, and documents in the next column. And in the last column...
"What's all this?"
One of the men lifted a heavy pouch. I sat down next to the rice bowl and looked at them, forgetting the almonds.
"…Macadamia?"
That was over there.
By the way, there's also some in the small drawer next to the door.
Crunch. Crunch.
When the thieves were silent in their absurdity, all I could hear was the sound of me forgetting almonds in the library. Two other thieves, who had noticed my presence, approached me.
"What is this?"
"It looks like a rat?"
"You look unusual. Isn't his fur golden?"
…Is it a demon beast?
"After all, it's about the Grand Duke of the North…"
No, it's just a hamster.
I took the last almond and took a picture of the mukbang. Bring me some macadamias in your hand. Three almonds? I don't even go to the message.
"…Is this expensive?"
I heard the sound of saliva coming from the thief's mouth as he stared at my mukbang for a long time. They exchanged glances and soon began to open the hamster cage.
It's really a plan, and there's nothing to it.
I found a woman, I found a confidential, and now I kidnapped a hamster.
There's no stick. How could such clumsy people try to be thieves? It's a miracle that I didn't get caught.
I sighed without even looking at the hands coming down from the ceiling. Come out soon. It's a good time to appear, isn't it?
Then.
"What, what!"
Clang! There was a loud sound of glass breaking. Three thieves. Then, the idiots craned their necks like meerkats and glanced out the window.
"Do you dare to touch mine?"
Like a sharpened blade, a voice resembling the wind of the highest altitudes of the North, fell like frost. The idiots had already started trembling as if they were dead three times just by his voice.
Yes… So, this is called karma in technical terms. In a word, it's a mess.
[Dare to kidnap my sugar hamster! ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ ]
I never said that. But why are you excited?
"I won't let you live."
No, you're punished by death for touching a hamster?
Kyle pulled a knife from his waistband.
…Apparently, they really wouldn't let him live.