Sasuke was surprised to find that he was not the only one summoned to the Hokage's office. He'd thought this was about his latest mission (a complete disaster through no fault of his own) and had prepared a mental list as to why he should still be promoted within ANBU.
However, Neji was here, too, and Neji was not part of ANBU nor did Sasuke like his company very much. He frowned at Tsunade where she sat behind her desk, elbows on the table and hands clasped underneath her chin. She looked between them, calculating, with Shizune nervously shifting behind her left shoulder.
"I'm sure it hasn't escaped you that Uzushio is about to host their traditional selection of their future leader's chakra bond partner?" she asked, though it was clear she didn't expect the answer to be negative.
This was starting to smell like something Sasuke did not want to be part of. Perhaps his next mission would be to escort the poor kunoichi selected for the event to the Land of Whirlpools, which he would of course accept as it was his duty as a ninja, but would definitely hate every single second it lasted.
The thing was, you'd need to have been born under a rock to escape the tradition of chakra bindings between villages. Sasuke had tried to ignore it as much as possible, however. Seeing as some villages liked to pass the leadership down to their children, and some selected their strongest, most intelligent ninja for the position, there was always a bit of unrest and mixed feelings about the selection process that followed.
As in, if the title passed on to your child, everyone knew about the potential bonding from the moment the child was born. Of course Uzushiogakure practiced this tradition. Of course every single kunoichi born not too far from the birth of a certain Uzushio heir harbored a secret hope that she would be the one selected.
The positive effect was terribly strong kunoichi in the surrounding villages. The negative effects were that they wouldn't shut up about it. Sasuke hated gossip and he hated the thought of becoming a village leader without proving your actual worth as a ninja, and he also hated the idea of living a meaningless existence in someone's shadow because of politics.
"I don't see how it concerns us," he replied eventually, realizing that Tsunade was expecting some sort of reaction.
He'd spent a few months at the age of eighteen worrying that the recently appointed Mizukage would extend her acceptable age range to more than ten years her junior or senior, which could have potentially made him a candidate for Konoha. Even though the villages would send some of their strongest ninja as candidates, they wouldn't send their absolute strongest or someone indispensable to the village.
Sasuke had been working hard all his life to become indispensable, as he was the second son of the Uchiha clan leader, and as such was living in constant risk of political maneuvering. He'd rather die than become a trophy. His brother had tried to convince him it was an enviable position to the benefit of the village, peace, and general protection of his clan. His brother was full of bullshit.
The pinched look on Tsunade's young-looking face made his stomach drop. She was not chakra-bonded to another village as she had married long before taking up the position, and Sasuke knew that this meant Konoha was hard-pressed to have their candidates selected by other villages to form proper alliances. Either that or select a second Hokage, seeing as the Third had retired and the Fourth had died before any bonding had been performed.
Somehow he doubted they were there to be offered the position of Hokage.
"Yes, well," she started, huffing a little in irritation. "As you may know, Uzumaki Naruto is a rather unpredictable person. He's been holding the selection off for several years, and it seems they finally agreed to his terms."
Well, this was rather surprising. Sasuke had assumed the man held them off to keep his freedom for a little longer – understandable, as it was not a bond made out of love. It didn't necessarily mean the people involved were unhappy, as a certain level of compatibility was needed, but no one wanted a political marriage at eighteen.
Sasuke didn't want one at twenty-four either, but that was beside the point.
"Please tell us why we've been summoned, Hokage-sama." It was Neji, his voice dripping with boredom, but Sasuke could see the slightly wild look in his pale eyes. "I was in the middle of a mission with my genin team."
It didn't escape Sasuke that they were both of suitable age, strong enough to be considered, and not important enough to their clans that they couldn't be spared. He felt his life start flashing before his eyes.
"The future Uzushio leader has requested a man as his bonding partner."
If Sasuke had not been busy panicking, he would have laughed at all the poor girls working so hard to be selected only to have been born the wrong gender. They were always going on about how handsome Naruto was, how strong and cool and perfect. He wasn't sure they'd ever even met him.
Sasuke had, at the tender age of twelve. The guy was a snot-nosed brat with a terrible temper and stupid mouth, and they'd had to be separated by force before successfully maiming each other. He would die of humiliation before accepting what Tsunade was implying.
"No," he gritted out between clenched teeth, and only the fact that turning around and leaving would mean Tsunade picking him out of sheer pettiness kept him from hightailing it out of there.
"It's already been discussed with your clans."
She didn't even have the decency to look apologetic. Well, to her it was probably also considered an honor to be selected. Sasuke had felt falsely secure that he was successfully avoiding any potential matchmaking, especially since he'd managed to personally piss off several current kages and other village leaders. It was a gift to be insulting enough that they hated him, but not enough that they'd consider it an official insult to their villages.
Letting out a slow breath, his mind whirred as he considered a way out. If his clan had agreed, they'd shun him for digging his heels in and refusing. If he lost on purpose, he'd be shamed for the rest of his life. If he died, he was certain they'd find a way to bring him back to life just to make sure he couldn't escape.
His only hope was that Naruto still hated him and would dismiss him for personal reasons. If he was still quick to anger it shouldn't be too hard to aggravate him enough, and then the fault would be on Naruto's side and Sasuke could escape with his pride intact.
Shikamaru might find a few flaws with this plan, which was why he vowed to never tell a living soul about it. It was better to let people think he was reluctantly agreeing to do his duty, and then fail the compatibility test.
Thus, Sasuke 'accepted' his fate with a mask of boredom firmly in place.
"As you wish, Hokage-sama."
On the inside, he considered, for the first time in his life, letting Neji beat him at something on purpose.
♡♡♡
The trip to Uzushiogakure was not long. It felt long, but that was attributable to the feeling of doom and gloom attached to him the past weeks. His brother had tried to encourage him to see this as a great opportunity and experience, as it would be incredibly beneficial and important to the clan if you were chosen. Some days he hated how much Itachi cared about the village and the clan. Other days he simply ignored it and pretended he cared, too.
The thing was, Sasuke was not the most loyal of villagers. He'd been kidnapped and brainwashed to turn on his home and family, and even though that creepy snake Orochimaru had been stupid to pick him – considering Sasuke eventually killed him and all that – he'd also become rather disillusioned to things like village loyalty. All villages were the same, and they all fought each other over pointless things. Or, as was the case currently, fought other people together. Sending him as an offering to Uzushio could very well be seen as an offense, though Sasuke had built up a reputation that maybe (emphasis on the maybe) allowed people to overlook his misspent youth.
Sasuke was not annoyed at the potential switch of villages, but certainly irked at the thought of ending his days as a political pawn. And so he dragged his feet along the way, lips continuously downturned to show his displeasure.
"I can't believe you're going through with this," Neji said by the end of their first day of travel, his tone bored but his expression betraying his curiosity. "I was half convinced you'd leave the village altogether to escape."
"Too much work," he muttered, shrugging.
It was absolutely not because his mother had been on cloud nine and his father had given one of his hard-won nods of approval. He could have run away if he'd wanted to. But honestly, Sasuke did care about his family and shuddered at the thought of forcing his brother to hunt him down. Again.
"Still," Neji pressed on, ignoring Sasuke's scathing look. "As much as I hate the thought of playing house with someone I've never met, I've long since accepted my fate as an expendable member of my clan. Now that Hinata-sama has given birth, even more so. But you? It's almost laughable to think about."
If Sasuke was not wholly dedicated (body and soul and all that jazz) to his plan of faking agreement and making the idiot reject him out of supposed free will, he would have… well, he's not sure what he would have done, but as it was he simply smirked superiorly at Neji.
"I'm a man of many talents, unlike you," he said, enjoying with sadistic pleasure how Neji almost choked in anger. "I'll have the future Uzushio leader wrapped around my little finger in no time."
There was still suspicion in Neji's eyes, mingled with shock, but then he shook his head and walked over to Kakashi who was busy setting up a small fire.
The thing was, Sasuke could probably wrap Naruto around his little finger, if he wanted to. He was an attractive man. He knew how to flirt with men and women alike – but only because he so enjoyed breaking their hearts. He would, however, be absolutely useless at playing house, seeing as he could barely cook rice (his brother cooked for them), unless by cooking you counted mixing dried ingredients with hot water during missions and pretending it was actual stew. He also hated cleaning and decorating and all things homely. Give him a katana and a training field and he'd be happy as a genin let loose in a weapon's shop.
Sasuke had priorities, and his first priority was to never show weakness. Weakness made people use you. It was weakness that gave Orochimaru the chance he needed to whisk him away.
He would not let the prospect of marrying an orange-loving, ramen-eating idiot scare him.
Chin held high, Sasuke vowed to never get involved in clan politics again.
♡♡♡
To stay true to character, Sasuke had chosen his outfit for his first (official) arrival in Uzushio carefully. Ino had helped, which was a surefire way to make sure he looked appropriately sexy. While Ino was not someone Sasuke generally liked to come within speaking distance of, he needed provocative, not clan-approved.
(That was his first of many mistakes.)
Of course, he still needed to wear the Uchiha clan symbol visibly. Let it be known that Sasuke was five-time winner of Konoha's inofficial sexiest ninja in the village competition, much to his traditional clan's chagrin. His original clothes had been picked for him by the clan elders, but with Ino's help they'd come up with alterations a bit more aligned with his plan.
(The plan was to make himself look mouthwatering enough that he survived a few weeks and then piss Naruto off so much that looks no longer mattered.)
He still wore his regular ninja sandals, because they were ninjas obviously, but the rest…
At first glance, you'd think he was wearing a traditional type of kimono made of the finest silk as the innermost visible layer. It was black, and it truly was made of fine silk, but it was also very thin and not designed to close properly across his chest. It could have been an accident, the way the overlapping fabric seemed to fall outwards to reveal both collarbones and sternum (and perhaps a nipple, if you looked from the right angle). Little Uchiha fans adorned the borders, to fully accentuate how sinfully not-closed the flaps were.
The lower half of the kimono was hidden underneath his hakama skirt, the pleated fabric a pale grey color that ended just above his ankles. It was tied very tightly around his waist, in contrast to the kimono above, showing off his slim waist and long legs. The haori was dark blue, the wide sleeves artfully showing off the pale skin of his underarms when he lifted a hand to run it through his hair (yes, he had practiced this move). It had a large clan symbol on the back, and so you could argue that he was wearing traditional clothing, but anyone who looked closely enough would raise their eyebrows at the supposed kimono. And Naruto would come close enough, certainly.
Sasuke would saunter and smirk and allow the haori to artfully slip down one shoulder, and perhaps he'd bite his lip and absentmindedly run a finger down the visible dip between his pectorals. He might even go so far as to blame the heat and ask Naruto to hold his haori for a bit. (If he turned around then, you'd be able to see how the hakama somehow managed to accentuate his ass with purpose.)
And so, dressed traditionally slutty (ahem), Sasuke made his way out of the room he'd been assigned the previous night, and steeled himself for the formal welcoming to the village that awaited him that morning. Even though they had arrived the day before, they'd snuck inside without much notice, all in order to make the 'reveal' that much more exciting to the people. Naruto himself supposedly didn't know who had been sent by the respective villages.
He met Neji in the corridor outside their rooms, acting as if he didn't notice the wide eyes and slightly flushed cheeks his look inspired in the other ninja.
"Should I be concerned?" Neji asked once he'd gotten over his initial shock, his own clothing decidedly more conservative.
"I have no idea what you're talking about," Sasuke sniffed, and practiced walking seductively down the hallway towards the stairs.
They had eaten breakfast in their respective rooms, but now Sasuke couldn't help but feel curious as to his so called competition from the other villages. It wouldn't only be the big five, but several smaller ones too. Not that he cared. He just needed to scope out the others to make sure his plan worked. If everyone else was awful, he'd need to be a more awful choice than them. If he were lucky, there would be several people fitting Naruto's type that he could easily lose to.
He didn't know Naruto's type, but that shouldn't be too hard to figure out after a couple of days.
Rolling his neck, he mentally prepared himself for weeks full of suffering.
♡♡♡
Uzumaki Naruto was going to marry for love, believe it. It had taken him long enough to convince the annoying village council that he would only marry a man, but he wouldn't settle. His parents loved each other deeply, anyway, and Naruto wanted that, too.
He could, he supposed, be alright with a woman, but men made his breath hitch and his palms sweat and his heartbeat skyrocket, whereas women was mostly just, well, alright. Not for lack of trying, certainly. How he'd spent years with Jiraiya, self-proclaimed master of all womanly secrets, and turned out gay is a mystery.
(Or maybe not, depending on how you chose to view his experiences while travelling).
Maybe he was just born this way.
Anyway, the point was, Naruto was extremely nervous to meet his suitors because what if none of them were the love of his life?? There was no way he'd get another chance. The few encounters he'd had during missions and the like had never resulted in anything stronger than attraction, and Naruto had not, not even once in his life, felt more than a slight crush towards someone.
(Unless you counted his obsessive episode at age twelve, but that was really a case of bruised pride and not sexual awakening. No sir, not in the slightest.)
He thought he had the right to be nervous, considering. The diplomacy lessons that had been drilled into his head the past few weeks seemed to fade to black all at once as he stepped onto the stage where he was to receive his guests. Navigating a chakra bonding selection had been impossible enough in theory. Now, he would face 24 skilled ninjas from 12 different villages, all eager (?) to marry him. At least their villages were eager for them to marry him. How was he supposed to find someone who genuinely liked him, and wasn't motivated by the promised alliance? He had three weeks to drop the number down to half, and then another month to make his final choice.
All of it would be supervised by representatives of the villages, to ensure no one tried to break the rules. (And there would be attempts, for sure). Uzushio had appointed a special taskforce to spy on them from the shadows, and never had Naruto been subject to such little privacy. They started three months ago, just following him around and guarding his apartment, all to ensure no one tried to get to him in advance.
His friends had speculated over possible candidates, but Naruto had tried to tune them out. He didn't want to make guesses or look up information in advance. He would have the entire day tomorrow to go through each contestant's personal file, and compare it with experiences that other Uzushio ninja may have had with them.
But first impressions were everything, apparently, and so Naruto dried his sweaty hands on his kimono (hoping no one noticed) and squared his shoulders.
Need me to give you a pep talk? Kurama asked, snickering already.
"Please spare me," Naruto muttered out loud, nodding once at his mother and father and then at the guard standing by the draperies that they would all appear from.
There was a whole crowd gathered below the stage, eagerly murmuring and standing on their toes to catch a glimpse of things. Naruto usually loved attention – thrived on it, even – but he would much rather meet his future husband in private the first time.
I'll make sure you pick someone who won't bore me to death, Kurama said, which had Naruto's lips twitch just a bit.
He was not so sure that a chakra entity knew much of romance, though, of course, the chakra bonding would most likely affect him as well. Now that was something Naruto preferred not to dwell on. No pressure, he'd just be bound by chakra for his entire life to the person he chose. Everything was fine.
Everything was not fine, as his mother stepped up to the edge of the stage and started on her speech, voice booming over the crowd, red hair flaming around her. He could not have repeated her words under threat of life, once she finished. But the audience gave her a big applause, and then an old, gnarly council member went up to a microphone, tapped it to make sure everyone's ears had to suffer, and then proceeded to announce the first candidate chosen by Kirigakure.
The order had been chosen randomly, though each village had decided which candidate would be in the first half and which would be in the second half. Some took this seriously, others left it up to chance.
The first contestant (aspiring fiancé, Kurama reminded him) was around the same age as him, pale hair reaching his chin, eyes a strange shade of lilac. When he parted his lips to smile, Naruto almost shuddered at how sharp his teeth were.
"Hozuki Suigetsu, pleasure to meet you, Naruto," he drawled after a quick bow, and the casual drop of his name had Naruto both feeling at ease and full of suspicion.
"Nice to meet you, Suigetsu-san," he replied as he returned the bow, because his mother would flay him alive if he didn't act according to the level of not-formal but definitely not hinting at having met before that the council had agreed on with the visiting villages.
As Suigetsu flashed him another sharp grin and turned to walk towards the seats where the contestants would sit as their rivals were introduced, Naruto hoped the next person would have normal teeth.
His nerves didn't let up as his suitors came on stage one by one. A few of them seemed nice, and several of them were attractive. Some he recognized, and of course he knew Gaara, one of his oldest friends. Seeing Gaara was a relief, because even though Naruto had never really felt any romantic attraction towards him, he knew his friend would make a great partner.
Still, no one had stood out to him with only a few left, though he tried to convince himself that he was just too nervous to make a connection on a stage in front of half his village. (Love at first sight only happened in movies and his dreams, anyway).
He smoothed down the front of his kimono, white with red swirls and an orange haori on top. His father had expressed concerns that the colors weren't appropriate, but his mother had only laughed and allowed him to dress as he wished. He wondered what they all thought of him – some had eyed him a little too closely, and some had seemed rather bored. A few were nervous, stumbling over their words, which surprised him as they were all trained ninjas.
Greeting the second of the two samurai that competed for the Land of Iron, Naruto briefly wondered if he truly was doomed to live his life in a loveless marriage. But maybe someone would surprise him. He shouldn't be too shallow, anyway, and only rely on his first impression–
"Konohagakure, Uchiha Sasuke," the announcer's voice rang out over the crowd, and Naruto's mouth fell open.
Sasuke? Of all people-
All thoughts died the moment Sasuke stepped through the draperies, elegant hand pushing them aside.
Breathtaking.
Tall and slender, with a grace that screamed of raw power, and a face like he'd been sculpted from Naruto's inner desires.
Gone was the bratty twelve-year-old with an upturned nose, whose temper was quick to blow the second Naruto goaded him. He was no longer a child – obviously – and more than a decade's time had transformed Sasuke into pure temptation.
Naruto's knees were weak.
His palms were sweaty again.
His heart beat so hard against his ribs that he feared it might escape.
It was all he could do not to choke on air, tongue like lead in his mouth. Sasuke moved towards him as if Naruto was currently dreaming, dark eyes bearing down on him. His lips looked so soft. Naruto's eyes trailed down from his mouth to his chin to the creamy skin stretched over collarbones, further down the length of his sternum, getting stuck where the kimono folded across his chest much lower than could be legal.
Oh, how was he going to survive?
Something in Sasuke's body language made him shiver, a promise of pleasure so intense he would be ruined for any other man. Choose me if you dare, whispered the deliberate steps of his feet, the curve of his shoulders as he paused to bow. I will destroy you and you will love every second of it.
His gaze tore away from the indecent fluttering of the much too open kimono, barely daring to meet Sasuke's as his smooth, deep voice introduced him to Naruto.
"Uchiha Sasuke," he said, each word weighed carefully, ensuring Naruto was fully entranced. "I look forward to knowing you, Na-ru-to."
So cocky, and Naruto bit back a groan at the knowing twinkle in those dark, dark eyes. He wanted to walk up to Sasuke and grab his face, just to see if he was truly real. Instead he bowed in return, mumbling something he wasn't entirely sure was coherent. Sasuke quirked his lips, just a little at the corner, just enough to make a perfect combination of sexy and infuriating. Naruto was thankful for the many layers of fabric he wore, hoping he wouldn't sweat through them. Or worse.
When Sasuke turned – elegantly and holding his gaze for a moment past his shoulder – Naruto was helpless against the urge to watch him walk the entire way over to the seats. Fuck. He had no idea what the other contestants were called or what they looked like anymore. His brain had screeched to a halt and now shot the name Sasuke back and forth like a ball. It bounced around in there until he got dizzy, which might also have been due to forgetting to breathe.
Something told him he was now in a lot of trouble. But Sasuke had entered the selection, hadn't he? Naruto couldn't for the life of him understand why Sasuke was still single. He greeted the last two contestants in a confused haze, barely recognizing how his father then held a speech about finding love and the honor of supporting their village leader through life and death.
His skin felt like it was buzzing, impatience crawling up his spine. He wanted to go home and pour over Sasuke's personal file, and maybe try to deal with all the overwhelming feelings his mere presence inspired. Maybe get a grip before he sent all the other people home and picked his winner before they even started.
You're thinking with your dick, Kurama informed him with glee, and Naruto couldn't even deny it.
Yeah, he really needed to get a grip.
Not entirely sure of his success rate so far (because Naruto had looked like a gaping fish, but that could just be because he was an idiot), Sasuke obediently followed everyone else down the stage and back into the hotel where they were to stay during the whole thing. They had to mingle with important people from Uzushio, no doubt to test them on their social and diplomatic skills, and Sasuke needed to figure out an appropriate level of aloof but not obviously rude. The problem was that his brain seemed stuck on the red color dusting Naruto's cheeks as he ran his eyes unashamedly up and down Sasuke's body.
At least he had made an impression. The fact that Naruto wasn't terrible to look at, well, at least his stay wouldn't be insufferable. He could probably have fun teasing the other man, drawing expressions from his open face but never giving him what he wanted. He was curious to know what Naruto's breaking point might be…
But he was getting ahead of himself. He needed to sow a few seeds of doubt on his suitability, not enough to deter Naruto at this early stage, but something that would weigh into the decision as they neared the first selection round. Just to make sure Naruto's advisors didn't feel any sense of joy in his presence. Sasuke would certainly not feel any joy as he mingled with them.
He kept his body language strictly business, and his answers short but to the point. He didn't back down from those who tried to challenge him, but he didn't rise to the bait either. Honestly, all it did was leave him with a faint headache at the end of the few hours that felt like a lifetime, and not nearly as many disapproving faces as he'd planned.
Hopefully they all just had orders to look neutral at all times to make sure no one suspected any allegiances. Politics was so exhausting.
They were ushered into the attached restaurant for lunch, and Sasuke ended up sandwiched between Neji and the jinchuuriki from Suna. Obviously he knew who Gaara was, everyone did. Sasuke especially knew as they had faced off during the chuunin exams. It had been a match in Gaara's favor, and Sasuke had not made chuunin until much later, after the whole debacle with Orochimaru was over.
No, he was not bitter about it.
"What do you think of Naruto?" Gaara asked, his strangely pale green eyes fixated on him.
Sasuke could feel them burn holes in the side of his head. Maybe Gaara felt threatened by him, because to Sasuke's limited knowledge he was already rather close with Naruto. And Gaara was not an unattractive man, instead fairly eye-catching with his dark red hair matching the kanji tattooed on his forehead, not to mention the heavy eyeliner around his eyes. But he had no eyebrows. It was hard not to stare when Sasuke turned to face him.
"Not much," he shrugged flippantly.
Neji snorted on his other side, most likely thinking of how the both of them weren't exactly happy volunteers. His answer seemed to annoy Gaara however, eyes narrowing and fingers clenching the chopsticks in his hand.
"You're the only one he reacted to," Gaara told him, in that toneless voice he seemed stuck with. "Why?"
Well, that was news to Sasuke. Of course, he'd missed all the other ones since he was almost the last one out, and a quick glance at Neji showed that Gaara spoke the truth.
"Feel free to ask him," was all Sasuke said, but he made sure to smirk just a bit at Gaara, because obviously he was the better looking out of all of them.
His strategy of sexy but rude seemed to be working well so far.
♡♡♡
Naruto was shut inside his room with a pile of folders, each one containing information on his potential future husbands. So far, all of them lay untouched except the one he kept flipping the pages of, back and forth, between the picture and the scarce personal info.
Sasuke was 182 cm tall. That was two centimeters taller than him. He could not stop thinking about it.
The picture was the simple headshot most ninja have to take for their registration file, decidedly impersonal and with a chuunin vest zipped up high. He still looked beautiful.
He tapped his foot against the floor, a nervous beat out of sync with his heart. There wasn't a lot to read in the file, since all questions had short answers. Of course, they couldn't reveal more about his ninja abilities than what was already mostly known, though with Sasuke you would have to assume they were extra secretive. He liked tomatoes because they were nutritious. He had a lightning chakra affinity (everyone knew and feared his chidori) aside from the Uchiha clan's well-known fire affinity. He was born on July 23rd, same year as Naruto. He was a jounin.
Naruto groaned, smacking the folder against his forehead. It wasn't nearly enough! Even the questionnaire that had to be filled in by the contestants was so generically answered that you'd think Sasuke had no personality whatsoever. Who the hell lists their favorite book as the ninja codex?! It was a blatant lie and Naruto wanted to scream in frustration.
Sasuke was a mystery in so many ways and Naruto needed to figure him out. He would start tomorrow, when he was meant to escort each contestant one lap around the decorative garden located not far from the headquarters building. It was conveniently maintained for official visitors, so that pleasant discussions could be held while multiple ninja spied on them. Naruto was not a fan of being spied on, but in this case he had picked everyone on his own, to make sure that if he embarrassed himself, he'd know exactly who knew and how to make sure they kept silent about it.
They're still going to make fun of you, Kurama snorted, but Naruto was too busy panicking over what he'd say to Sasuke to listen to him.
He had so many questions…
♡♡♡
No one had told him how boring it would be. On day two since the night of arrival, Sasuke had eaten breakfast, had listened to a long, monotonous presentation on Uzushio's history, and had then tried to meditate in his room. It was a lovely hotel room if you cared about things like that, with a soft bed and moss green walls and a clean bathroom. There was not enough room to work out. He still tried, though, before giving up and resorting to meditation.
Lunch was served in the restaurant, and Sasuke had sat opposite of Neji and neither had uttered a single word. There had been tension in the air, because everyone knew that things would start for real that afternoon. They were to stay in their rooms until fetched (and oh how Sasuke hated being fetched) by their designated guide, and then Naruto would take them for a walk around some garden where they would make a second first impression on him.
It was easy to tell who cared and who didn't as he'd swept his eyes over his fellow contestants at lunch. He recognized a few, and though he could usually tell where they came from, he had to admit that no one looked particularly impressive. He wondered if Naruto would be as annoying as he'd been as a kid.
At precisely a quarter past four, someone knocked on the door to Sasuke's room. He had dressed yet again in his formal clothes, as instructed. Maybe so that Naruto would remember them easier. He opened the door to a red-haired woman in glasses and purple clothes, who took one look at him and immediately licked her lips.
"I'm Uzumaki Karin," she said, finally lifting her eyes to his face. "Hurry up."
She turned and left, and Sasuke contemplated not following. Then he sighed, resigning himself to his current circumstances, and did as told. Karin led him to the garden through a series of connected corridors, maybe to make sure random people didn't interrupt them. Most buildings in Uzushio were tall and rounded, but the corridors seemed to go in a straight line – probably underground, considering the flight of stairs leading down to them, and then another set leading out into the garden itself. He wondered if there was an entire network of tunnels underneath the city. It seemed both practical and difficult to defend.
"You need to wait in there," she said, pointing to an open tent standing underneath a tree with twisted branches.
There were a couple of genin in the tent serving tea as they waited, and Sasuke sipped from his cup with barely contained impatience. He wasn't used to being idle. This wasn't a mission requiring constant vigilance, but it wasn't leisure time either where he could relax and focus on whatever piqued his interest lately. Usually he was training on his days off.
It was one of many reasons he couldn't imagine himself as a house husband. If the village leader was shut indoors for paperwork, what was their chakra bond partner supposed to do with all their free time? Knit?
He almost laughed out loud. Luckily he didn't, because Naruto chose that moment to walk into the tent, his eyes zoning in on Sasuke and not leaving.
Sasuke stared back. No one said anything. Naruto's eye twitched nervously, and then he jerked his head for Sasuke to follow him. Scoffing on the inside, Sasuke placed his cup on a table and slowly made his way over to the future Uzushio leader, chin held high. They maintained eye contact until Sasuke paused just a step away, and he could see Naruto swallow, gaze flickering down to Sasuke's mouth and back up.
Maybe he was a little too good at this being seductive thing.
"Well?" he asked, raising an eyebrow at the still silent ninja.
"Uh, yeah," Naruto said, glancing behind Sasuke and then stiffly turning towards the garden path. "Let's, uh, let's just. Go."
He was about as smooth as a pile of shuriken. Sasuke followed him a step behind, eyeing the brightly orange kimono he wore today. The silk looked stiff and heavy, with a beautiful embroidered pattern that shimmered in the afternoon sun. It showed off Naruto's broad shoulders, though he looked tense and slightly hunched over. Sasuke hated being part of awkward silences. Either say what you wanted or don't bother spending time together. He was not going to start talking, though. This was Naruto's problem, not his.
Naruto did not start talking, either.
They walked slowly, shoulder to shoulder, looking anywhere but each other. He could feel several ninjas spying on them, some hiding better than others. The park was beautiful, with ponds and bridges and trees hanging over the water. There were water lilies and koi fish, statues artfully placed here and there. The sunlight bathed Naruto in golden colors, his bright hair and brighter kimono difficult to look at whenever Sasuke snuck glances at him.
Sure, Naruto was attractive, he couldn't deny that. Had they met randomly he wouldn't have been opposed to spending the night together. He wondered what the rules were on physical intimacy – he'd kind of zoned out whenever Shizune tried to go over the rules with him. Maybe if they slept together he'd be disqualified. What a win-win situation.
As they neared the end of the path, Naruto drew in a deep breath and paused. They were standing on a small bridge, the wood painted red. It looked like a fresh paint job. Sasuke considered this as he pretended to be utterly bored, Naruto working his mouth but no words leaving him.
"Ugh," Naruto eventually forced out, taking the two steps to reach the railing and leaning over it, arms folded. "You know you're the only one who didn't write anything interesting or personal in your file, right?"
Sasuke blinked, lifting his gaze from the planks underneath his feet to squint in irritation at Naruto's back.
"My sincerest apologies," he drawled, ignoring Naruto's half-hearted glare. "Can't help having such a bland personality."
"I really doubt you have a bland personality."
"It's terribly bland. People tell me all the time."
Clearly frustrated, Naruto ran both hands through his hair, messing it up.
"Literally the only thing you listed under likes were tomatoes. That's just stupid."
Rolling his eyes, Sasuke joined Naruto by the railing. He poked at the paint before delicately leaning his underarms on it, turning to look at the fish swimming lazily below them.
"Maybe tomatoes are the key to my heart. What would you know."
"When it comes to you, it seems I know absolutely nothing."
He watched Naruto from the corner of his eye, amused despite himself at the obvious way he pouted, as if Sasuke was the one pestering him and not the other way around. Figuring he might as well make his move, Sasuke shifted his weight and stretched his arm out, fingertips gently touching Naruto's jaw. It had the other man turning towards him, eyes wide in surprise.
"Maybe I want you to find things out yourself," he said, adding a mischievous little smile that had Naruto blushing furiously. "And where's the fun in making it easy for you?"
Naruto gaped at him, but before he could reply, Sasuke pushed off the railing and headed down the path again. He couldn't help feeling a little smug as Naruto raced to catch up with him, face going through a myriad of expressions before settling on exasperated.
"You're just toying with me," he grumbled, crossing his arms before letting out a huff. "Bastard."
"Idiot."
They glared at each other until they reached the tent.
(Sasuke had, unknowingly, just made his second mistake.)
Sasuke had never felt any particular emotion towards ramen before, but he did now. Hatred. He stared down at the soggy mess supposed to be offered to Naruto, and wondered if he'd be sent home immediately for ruining the meal. It would be embarrassing, but at least he'd be able to go home.
A quick glance around the large room filled with cooking stations – it was usually used for cooking classes, something Sasuke had avoided successfully so far in life – showed that he was the only one who seemed ready to throw the whole thing away. This was a good thing, he told himself. He didn't want to impress Naruto. But even he could tell that whatever was in the bowl, was a miserable excuse for a meal and he had a moment where he feared his brother getting married and leaving him to fend for himself.
(Luckily his brother seemed to believe that the more family members he lived with, the better. Although, now that he thought about it, wasn't it a little strange that he and Shisui shared a bedroom? It's not like there was any lack of space.)
Shaking his head, he resolutely took his bowl over to the table by the side where Naruto sat, tasting the ramen one by one. Sasuke was one of the last to finish, which meant everyone else was expectantly watching as it was his turn. He thinned his lips and schooled his face into an indifferent mask, carelessly putting the bowl down in front of Naruto so that the broth threatened to spill over.
Naruto stared at him, then looked down at the bowl, immediately frowning.
"What the-?" he said, poking at the contents with his chopsticks. "Did you do this on purpose?!"
If only.
He raised his eyebrows, challenging Naruto to taste it.
"I can't eat this," Naruto muttered, picking up a piece of undercooked pork and eyeing it with distaste. "That's a health hazard."
"Oh no," Sasuke drawled, keeping his eyes firmly on Naruto's face. He didn't like how the others murmured amongst themselves, as if Sasuke cared about their opinion. "Don't eat it, then."
"I have to!" Naruto abandoned the pork to poke at the noodles instead, making a face like Sasuke had personally offended his ramen gods. "How did you manage to both undercook and overcook it? It's like you're trying to kill me!"
Sasuke huffed at him.
"I assure you, this is not how I go about killing people."
"What, you don't just ruin their favorite food so badly that they die from the sheer horror of it? Because you're killing me, Sasuke."
Naruto looked like he might start crying.
"It's just ramen," he said, apparently driving the nail into the coffin because Naruto let out a wail, pushing the bowl away from himself.
"I seriously can't eat this," he whined, then blinked, then blushed something fierce.
His eyes trailed over Sasuke's bare arms, then his chest, then settled somewhere on his neck.
"I can't eat that, either," he muttered under his breath, almost too low for Sasuke to catch it.
But he did catch it, and he rolled his shoulders for good measure, Naruto licking his lips as his gaze followed the movement. Sasuke had discarded his haori, since even though he'd worn it tucked into his hakama pants, the loose sleeves had kept getting in the way when he cooked. It seemed Naruto appreciated the tank top that was left, the neckline cut inappropriately low. It honestly hadn't been part of his plan, he'd just forgotten to get dressed again before dumping his complete failure in Naruto's lap.
Maybe that's what the others were whispering about, and not the ramen.
"Are we done?" he asked pointedly, biting his lip against a taunting smile as Naruto shook himself back to the present.
"Yes," he said, clearing his throat. "That was the worst attempt at ramen I've ever seen in my entire life."
"You're welcome."
Naruto glared at him. Sasuke glared back. Someone coughed. When Sasuke turned on his heel to retrieve his shirt, he could feel Naruto's eyes burning against his back.
(If he rolled his shoulders again, it was only because they felt stiff.)
♡♡♡
Two weeks down the road, Naruto was close to ripping his hair out.
"Does he have to be like that all the time," he groaned, pacing his bedroom. It was the only place he felt moderately alone in. At least he hoped no one spied on him in here, because they would have had to watch him work his poor dick to exhaustion. "Can't I just screw him and be done with it?!"
Sure, Kurama agreed, tone disinterested. If you want to start a political mayhem.
Letting out a frustrated noise, Naruto threw himself onto his bed, rolling around a few times to emphasize the pain he was currently feeling. There were going to be many trials and compatibility tests, but none of them would include bedroom compatibility. In fact, his mother had given him a very stern and embarrassing talk before everyone arrived to make sure he understood that he was under no circumstances allowed to choose his partner based on physical attraction.
He hadn't thought it would be a problem.
Sasuke, however, seemed fully intent on making his life (and dick) miserable. He kept wearing provocative outfits, kept teasing him, kept walking around like sin personified. It would be less of a problem if the others did the same thing – but either no one was trying to seduce him, or they were simply really bad at it.
They probably know they won't be picked if your reasoning is that you want to sleep with them, Kurama pointed out, causing Naruto to muffle a scream into his pillow.
He couldn't understand Sasuke at all. He was so inconsistent during challenges, and seemed to take twisted pleasure in aggravating Naruto until he was fuming, torn between punching him and shutting him up with a kiss. The cooking challenge was clearly an assassination attempt in disguise. Then, during the concealment challenge, no one had been able to find him for hours after all the others had been discovered, and he'd had the nerve to suddenly walk out in plain sight and shrug when asked how he'd done it.
They'd played shogi together, which Sasuke could have won easily ten times over, but which he dragged out while allowing Naruto to yell at him for refusing to answer simple questions about his life and family.
Everyone else was either easy or boring to spend time with. With Sasuke, he felt like he was boiling underneath his skin, one step away from blowing a fuse at all times. The one thing he'd definitely figured out about Sasuke was that he absolutely loved having the upper hand. He was no longer wondering why Sasuke was single. Clearly he was single because spending time with him drove you mad.
"He's awful," Naruto said, face still shoved into the pillow.
He couldn't stop thinking of ways to wipe the smug look off his face. What was the real Sasuke like? Did he even want to be a candidate? Was he just a jerk who felt sadistic pleasure at Naruto's suffering, or was he capable of showing other emotions as well?
He couldn't even begin to guess how the time spent with Orochimaru had changed the boy he met all those years ago – but so far Sasuke only looked different. He acted pretty much the same, actually. Taunting Naruto, always one step ahead. Acting so superior.
"Ugh, I hate him so much."
Says the guy obsessively thinking about him every second of the day.
"Oh, shut up."
♡♡♡
A few hours later, Naruto found himself standing between his mother and father, watching the group of suitors trickling into the training grounds. He still wasn't sure of what to call them. Suitors sounded weird, but calling them contestants made him feel like some kind of prize. He worried his lower lip between his teeth, watching the scenery instead. Not that there was much to see – these training grounds were surrounded by big piles of rocks, the ground flat and well-worn with no trees or any type of training equipment in sight. It was the ideal place to gather a large group of people and ensure maximum visibility.
In the middle, a large circle had been drawn on the ground in white paint. Spectators stood on the uneven rocks, some parts fixed to hold an audience, other parts only manageable if you were a ninja and could hold yourself up with chakra. The representatives of each village formed a half moon to one side of the circle, and all his suitors stood a ways off, a poor official struggling to make them form a proper line.
"Oh, this will be exciting!" his mom said, rubbing her hands together.
Most of her hair was obscured under a large hat with veils falling down the sides, but she turned her face towards him to grin brightly.
"Sure," he mumbled, receiving a slap to the back for his lack of enthusiasm.
"None of that! Your future husband is out there, and I won't accept someone who can't hold their own in a spar with you!"
Technically they would be sparring with one of his clones, but he bit his tongue and tried not to look at Sasuke too much.
"I'm sure they are all skilled," his dad added, smiling encouragingly at him. "And besides, just because your mother beat everyone to a pulp at her own trials, doesn't mean you need to do the same."
"Minato! I did no such thing!"
His dad merely winked at him, and Naruto huffed out a laugh. His mother was truly frightening sometimes. And of course he'd want to marry someone he could have fun training with, but why did it have to be in front of so many people?
He sighed, creating 24 identical clones that jogged over towards their opponents, forming a line opposite them. They were all grinning and stretching, much more excited than he himself felt. One day he'd have to consider the implications of his clones being so independent of him.
The rules were simple; all you had to do was push the clone out of the ring, or dispel it. Of course, Naruto's clones were more resilient than most, but only hand-to-hand combat was allowed. This ensured that no one simply walked in and blew fire at them or something, cutting the fight short. It also meant that each time the clone dispelled, Naruto was struck by the memories of the fight, letting him form an opinion on the person without he himself being involved in the fighting. As the clones had the same level of energy, there would be no advantage to being later in line.
Of course the line was the same as when Naruto had first greeted them. This meant Sasuke was almost last, and he had to fight down his nerves for a long time, anticipating their fight.
Some of the others were alright. The other ninja from Konoha, Neji, managed to dispel his clone faster than anyone else. Naruto didn't like him much, though. He was way too stiff and formal, even if he had nice hair.
By the end of next week, he'd need to cut the suitors down to half, preferably choosing one person from each village to stay. In some instances he already knew whom to choose, in others he wasn't so sure. When it came to Neji and Sasuke, the choice was both easy and hard. It was fairly easy to dismiss Neji, and very difficult to choose Sasuke.
"What do you think so far?" his mother asked him, when they were about two thirds through.
He shrugged, not sure what to say. He already knew Gaara was fun to spar with. Some of them had surprised him, like Suigetsu who kept turning into water to avoid getting hit, and both the samurai who were comparatively bad at fighting without their swords.
"Come on," she goaded him, "there must be someone you're starting to like? You've been clammed up ever since they got here!"
"It's only been two weeks," he defended himself with, sending his dad a pleading look. "It's not like I've spent a lot of time with each of them."
"Well, it'll be easier once they're cut down to half," his dad said, placing a hand on his shoulder. "All you need to do now is consider if they're worth getting to know or not."
If it really was like that, he'd cut them down to Sasuke and Gaara. Because he knew Gaara well enough to know they worked together, and Sasuke was honestly the only one who felt interesting to him. Even if interesting wasn't necessarily a positive word when it came to him.
"Don't give me that face," his mother scolded him, poking him in the cheek. "They're all fine young men. Let's get drinks tonight and talk about which ones you like!"
Naruto shuddered, thinking about what a disaster that would be. He was not good with alcohol and his mother was even worse. He wondered what Sasuke was like when he drank. Would he open up? Or close off even more, maybe. Maybe he refused to drink, simple as that.
Too soon and not soon enough it was Sasuke's turn. The man was dressed in simple standard pants and a sleeveless turtleneck that showed off his arms and the definition of his chest. Now that he stood in the drawn circle, Naruto could easily trail his eyes over his body, down and up again, meeting dark eyes filled with amusement.
He couldn't even feel bad about being caught. As his clone entered the circle, Naruto watched Sasuke's fingers flex once, his stance remaining relaxed. The judge gave the signal, and all of a sudden Sasuke was a blur engaged in battle.
There was no rule against using the Sharingan, Naruto realized as Sasuke's eyes flashed red. His clone held his own against him for a while, leaning heavily on defense. Sasuke moved beautifully, almost arrogantly, all his movements perfectly controlled. It didn't take long for Naruto to realize that his clone was being played with.
Definitely arrogant, he thought, biting his thumb. He felt jittery with nerves, anticipating the onslaught of memory once the clone disappeared. Sasuke slammed his clone to the ground, arm twisted behind it in Sasuke's tight grip, knee pressed into its back – Sasuke didn't really need to lean over it and murmur in its ear, eyes holding the real Naruto captive.
But he did, and when the clone disappeared with a sharp pop he almost grabbed onto his mother for support.
God, nothing could have prepared him for Sasuke up close, the intensity of his eyes, the breathless feeling of clashing fists. And the words gifted to his ear, lips just barely brushing the shell of it…
Let's fight for real next time.