The Educational Inspector
"Ugh... We've already got so much homework, and it hasn't even been a week. Aunt Narcissa gave us a half-metre essay on the Giant Wars, Snape wants another twelve-inch essay on the properties and uses of opal, and even Trelawney assigned us a dream journal for an entire month. Who dreams that much?" Daphne complained as she and the group walked down the corridor towards their next class of the day.
"Well, this is our O.W.L. year, so it's only natural that it'll be a difficult one," Hermione replied at once, not seeming particularly worried.
In fact, the only one who genuinely seemed concerned about the amount of homework was Daphne herself. Which was rather interesting, considering she had ranked as the fourth highest-scoring student in the entire year ever since joining Hogwarts. Naturally, the other three spots belonged to Harry, Hermione, and Draco, who always seemed to be competing for first place—the only competition Daphne never really bothered trying to win.
"Besides, remember that at Hogwarts you're supposed to call her Professor, not Aunt," Hermione added in a serious tone worthy of her prefect badge.
Naturally, Daphne paid absolutely no attention to that last part.
"Ugh, I just hope Aunt Wanda doesn't give us too much homework either," she said as they were about to enter the Defence Against the Dark Arts classroom.
"Pro-fess-or," Hermione immediately corrected her again.
Harry and Draco, walking behind them, simply watched the exchange without adding much. For them, it was hard not to get confused and call their mothers "Professor" or their professors "Mum," or something along those lines. After all, their mothers were their professors.
When they opened the classroom door, Wanda was already sitting at her desk with her usual calm composure, patiently waiting.
"Hi, Aunt Wanda," Daphne greeted immediately, quite obviously ignoring Hermione's earlier words... once again.
Hermione looked mildly annoyed for a moment before adding respectfully,
"Good afternoon, Professor Maximoff."
Wanda looked at the two girls for a moment and simply smiled in amusement, not making much of it, before gently waving at all four of them.
As in every one of Wanda's lessons, the rest of the students entered cheerfully and greeted her with remarkable ease. Not quite to Daphne's level, but everyone offered a simple greeting before taking their seats.
Wanda rose from her chair, ready to begin the lesson as usual.
A lesson that, as always, the students genuinely looked forward to more than almost any other, enjoying it immensely. They even loved the way Wanda taught. After all, she was a witch renowned for being stronger than perhaps even Dumbledore himself. She was approachable.
And above all...
She was incredibly beautiful.
But before Wanda could even open her mouth to begin, she turned her head toward the classroom entrance.
There, before the students had even noticed, someone was already standing in the doorway, watching everything with a sickeningly sweet smile.
Wearing that bright pink cardigan.
With a body resembling an oversized pink toad.
Dolores Umbridge.
"Do you need something?" Wanda asked in a flat tone.
For a brief moment, the entire classroom fell completely silent.
Wanda simply looked at her, waiting for an answer.
Umbridge's smile seemed to widen as she stepped fully into the classroom and walked towards Wanda.
"Good afternoon, Professor Maximoff, and good afternoon, students," Umbridge greeted them in that sugary voice that somehow managed to inspire nothing but disgust.
The students, momentarily confused, replied timidly,
"Good afternoon."
"Oh, dear, dear. Is that how you greet your professor?" Umbridge exclaimed upon hearing them. "Let's try that again, shall we—"
Before she could continue, Wanda interrupted her in an even colder tone than before.
"Excuse me, but I'm the professor in this classroom, and I'm trying to teach a lesson. So I'll ask you again. Do you need something?" Wanda said, staring directly at Umbridge and cutting off whatever she had been trying to do.
Normally, a look from Wanda was enough to make anyone instinctively take a step back.
But for some reason, Umbridge seemed brave enough not only to stand her ground, but to smile sweetly back at her.
"My apologies. I may have gotten a little carried away," Umbridge said in her sugary tone. "I'm sure that, like the other professors, Headmaster Black explained what my duties at Hogwarts would be, didn't he?"
"Educational Inspector at Hogwarts. We're aware of that," Wanda replied calmly, never taking her eyes off Umbridge.
"Excellent," Umbridge said at once. "I'm certain the Ministry sent every professor a letter—especially the Defence Against the Dark Arts professor, which would be you—explaining the subjects that should be covered this year, along with the required course material. Since in previous years the professors kept coming and going, and none of them even followed a Ministry-approved curriculum, the standard of this class has fallen well below what the Ministry considers acceptable. Therefore, the Ministry has prepared a new teaching method to correct those mistakes, beginning with the basics and focusing primarily on theory."
As Umbridge said this, the students waiting for the lesson couldn't help exchanging confused, bewildered looks.
Especially at the words theory...
...and basics.
"So I merely stopped by to make sure that you, as the Defence Against the Dark Arts professor, were following the carefully structured curriculum that was prepared for this school year. Though, of course, perhaps I'm worrying too much, because you must already have everything prepared... wouldn't you?" Umbridge finished in her ever-friendly tone.
But she didn't wait for Wanda's answer.
Instead, she turned towards the students.
"Does everyone have their copy of Defensive Magical Theory by Wilbert Slinkhard?"
"Who?" several students murmured one after another, equally confused by a textbook that hadn't appeared on their school supply list before the year had begun.
Harry, who had been watching the strange spectacle with an expression that was both interested and surprised at seeing Umbridge standing in front of his mother like that, found the whole thing rather fascinating.
Especially because his mother, who hadn't said a word until now, tilted her head slightly as she looked at Umbridge, wearing an intrigued smile.
"How can that be?" Umbridge exclaimed, as though what she'd just heard were the most shocking and disgraceful thing imaginable, even placing a hand dramatically over her chest. "Did the professor forget to inform her students about this year's required reading?" Umbridge asked, turning back towards Wanda, who continued looking at her.
"Perhaps I forgot," Wanda replied easily, without showing much of a reaction.
Naturally, no one in the classroom actually believed that answer.
"Then you should be grateful that I, as the Educational Inspector, happened to visit your very first lesson. Fortunately for your students, I had already prepared several copies so that each of them would have one to use," Umbridge said with a tight smile directed at the students, who, for a brief moment, all felt a faint sense of discomfort. "Don't worry, there's one for everyone," she quickly added, drawing her wand, which was noticeably shorter than most, and pointing it towards the doorway, where a trolley piled high with books had apparently been waiting. It now rolled gently into the classroom as the books floated off by themselves, each one drifting towards a desk until every student had a copy lying in front of them.
The students exchanged glances before looking down at the books.
Some of them actually seemed interested and opened the books.
Barely a few seconds later, those interested expressions had already turned into profound boredom, as though they had suddenly found themselves sitting through one of Professor Binns' lectures. To rid themselves of that feeling, they promptly closed the books again.
Even Harry and his group seemed intrigued at first.
Until they read part of the work written by this Wilbert fellow.
Judging from the very beginning of his masterpiece, if the contents reflected either his personality or his views on the subject, then Slinkhard was an absurdly extreme pacifist who advocated an entirely passive approach to conflict and discouraged the use of combative spells—even for self-defence. In fact, he seemed to discourage magic of almost any kind. It was as though, if someone or something were about to attack you, the only appropriate response would be to apologise or beg for mercy.
Harry shut the book with a dull thud, as though he had decided that reading any further posed a genuine threat to his mental health.
Draco simply flipped through the pages with one finger, skimming them, but his expression made it clear he wasn't even remotely interested in continuing.
Daphne read the introduction and, apparently without realising it, had reread the same paragraph several times while slowly dying of boredom.
Even Hermione seemed to be making an effort to keep reading it.
And that was saying a lot.
"Now that everyone has a copy, I won't disturb your lesson any longer, Professor Maximoff. I look forward to working alongside you and the other professors this year to make Hogwarts the finest magical school in the wizarding world," Umbridge said sweetly.
"Of course," Wanda replied, not even bothering to bid Umbridge farewell, simply watching her walk out through the door.
She didn't say another word until the door had closed behind her.
Only then did she turn back towards the students.
"Right. For now, put the book aside. It's time to begin today's lesson," Wanda said.
The moment she said that, the students couldn't help smiling in relief, realising they apparently wouldn't have to study from that book after all. It was as though she had simply let Umbridge keep talking until she ran out of words before finally getting on with the lesson.
Which, naturally, drew a smile from Harry.
As though there were anyone in the world capable of telling his mother what to do.