The first time I saw her it felt like my whole world stopped, she stood out to me as the most beautiful girl in the room I wanted to keep staring but I was scared of getting caught. As I walked out the room, something tugged at me-I couldn't resist glancing back, "just once more" I said to myself, our eyes locked for the briefest moment and in a flurry of nerve and impulse I smiled and said a soft "hi". But it hunged in the air, unanswered. I instantly regretted it, you didn't smile back, you didn't even blink as you walked past me like I didn't say a word, leaving me to the chill of your silence. I keptee walking, my face burning of embarrassment wondering if you heard me and just ignored me. Replaying the moment in my head I don't know why I thought it would go differently.
That evening, just as the weight of the awkward moment was beginning to settle into something I'd laugh of latter, my phone lit up with a message. I didn't recognize the number, but the words ere clear and direct "Hi, I'm Soshan. You don't know me-I got your number from a friend". I blinked at my screen half confused, half thrown off. It was "her". My first instinct was to ignore it after all, this was the same person who had brushed me off earlier. I stared at the message, a mix of curiosity swirling in me. I debated with myself whether to respond or let go. After a few minute of internal back and forth, I decided to reply with a simple "Hi I am Reuelle".
Just only if I could see the future I would have trusted my instinct and stayed silent. Cause that single word -hi- was the thread that unraveled everything. what followed wasn't the connection I'd hoped for, but a slow descent into confusion and emotional turmoil. It as if that initial message has opened a door to a part of me, I didn't know existed- a place filled with insecurity and despair.
My phone buzzed again it was Soshan " you have such a nice name what does it mean" I hesitated fingers hovering over the keyboard, then replied "God's friend" what about yours, she replied almost immediately "lily flower". After a few minute of silent when I thought the conversation was over my phone beeped again it was her " so, what kind of music do you like" I hesitated for a while didn't want to look too desperate then replied, "mostly alternative pop" you?.
Same, who is your favorite artist?. As a big fan of halsey I couldn't help to show her off with how good her song are, from there our conversation flowed effortlessly. We exchanged favorite movies, debated over the best icecream flavors, and even confessed our guilty pleasures. Each messages felt like a step closer, a layer peeled back. I found myself smiling at her witty remarks and pondering her thoughtful questions.
Days turned into night, and our chats became the highlight of my routine. Then, one evening, she asked, "would you like to meet up this weekend?" My heart raced as I typed back "I'd love to".