It's been exactly one month since I was reincarnated into this world.
Apparently, I had been reborn.
The reality of my situation had finally set in:
I was a baby.
I was finally able to confirm this after they picked me up and cradled my head so I could see my own body.
But why do I still have all my memories from my previous life?
Not that I was complaining, exactly, but who would imagine someone being reborn with all their memories, let alone that this wild delusion was actually true?
At first, I realized I wasn't in America; the language was different, and my parents didn't have American facial features; they looked like traditional Europeans.
They also wore what appeared to be an ancient form of clothing.
I didn't see anything resembling household appliances; a woman dressed as a maid came and wiped me with a rag after I was born.
The furniture, eating utensils, and the like were all made of wood.
Wherever I was, it didn't seem to be a developed nation.
We didn't even have electric lights, only candles and oil lamps. Maybe my parents were so poor they couldn't afford the electric bill.
But how likely was that, really? Seeing as they had a maid, I figured they must have money, but maybe the maid was my father's sister, or my mother's.
That wouldn't be so strange. At least she'd help with the housework, right?
I'd wished I could go back and do it all over again, but being born into a family too poor to pay the utilities wasn't exactly what I had in mind.
The woman who is apparently my mother is blonde with blue eyes; I see her practically every day.
The man who is apparently my father has brown hair and green eyes, and he always carries a metal sword at his waist...
I don't know how legal that is, but my mother and the maid don't seem to complain, so I have no reason to complain...
Yeah, as if I could say that.
This entire month I've spent trapped in a crib and blankets.
The air outside is too cold for some reason, and I'm always extremely tired.
The only good thing about all of this is that I kill most of the time simply sleeping.
But it gets to the point where even that becomes tedious.
As the workaholic grown man that I am, lying around all day doing nothing isn't exactly the best feeling in the world.
The worst comes when it's time to go to the bathroom. I have no control over this body, so before I know it, I'm covered in my own urine and shit.
To do this, I simply scream a few times to alert my mother or the maid about my embarrassing situation.
Also, one of the things I hate the most is mealtimes, considering the fact that I have to suck on a woman's tits.
And I won't lie.
My mother and the maid are both well-developed in that area, but thank goodness I can't have any erotic thoughts about my mother.
The maid is a different story, but she's always well-dressed when she's with me.
Also, for some reason...
for some fucking reason, my parents had sex the day after I was born.
Doesn't he know how painful that must be for my mother?!
"Aaah!..aahhh! Honey!..n-no more!"
"I'm just getting started!"
Uugh... yeah, this is bullshit.
...
Another five months passed as slowly as a snail.
After six months of listening to my parents converse, I began to learn some of the language.
My Spanish grades had never been very good, but I guess it's true what they say about sticking to your native language making it harder to advance in your studies.
Or maybe, since I had a new body, my brain was better equipped to learn this time around? I felt I had an unusual ability to remember things, perhaps because I was still so young.
Around this time, I started learning to crawl, too. Being able to move around was a wonderful thing. I'd never been so grateful to be in control of my own body.
"As soon as you take your eyes off him, he runs off somewhere," my mother said.
"Hey, as long as he's okay and healthy," my father replied, looking at me as he dragged me along.
"I was worried when he was born, and he never cried."
"He doesn't cry now either, does he?" My mother continued, somewhat concerned.
I wasn't exactly old enough to complain because I was hungry.
The times I did let out a cry were when I tried, and invariably failed, to stop soiling my pants.
Although I could only crawl, I learned a lot by being able to move around.
The first thing I learned was that this was definitely the home of a wealthy family.
The house was a two-story wooden structure with more than five separate rooms, and we had a maid on staff.
At first, I assumed she was my aunt or something, but given her respectful attitude toward my mother and father, I doubted she was family, not to mention her red hair, which was completely different from my parents'.
Our house was located in the countryside.
Outside the windows stretched a peaceful, pastoral landscape.
There were few other houses, just two or three nestled between the wheat fields on either side.
We really were in the countryside. I couldn't see any telephone poles or streetlights.
There might not even be a power plant nearby.
I'd heard that in some countries, power lines were run underground, but if that were the case here, it was strange that our house didn't have electricity.
This place was too pastoral.
I was used to the comforts of modern civilization. Here I was, having been reborn, practically dying to get my hands on a computer...
"Haaa..." I let out a sigh, which I immediately suppressed.
"My lady, young master Rudeus has escaped from his cradle again..." The maid said as she looked at me with a worried expression.
Apparently, in this world, my name is Rudeus. At first, it was very confusing because both my mother and father called me Rudy, but thanks to the maid, I was able to learn my real name.
Also, my parents' names are Zenith and Paul, and the maid's name is Lilia.
It was especially difficult to find out their names since my parents always use nicknames like "my love, darling, honey, cupcake, etc."
"Haaa...let him be, but if he gets close to a dangerous place, we'll stop him, okay?" my mother said with a resigned tone, and the maid nodded.
Yes, since I learned to crawl a month ago, the crib has no longer been a restriction for me. With good technique and patience, I can escape my wooden prison and crawl around the house.
The first few days, my mother was alarmed and immediately returned me to her. But when she saw my stubbornness, she moved my crib to the kitchen for a few days.
From there, I had a view of the outside, and of her too, but that still wasn't enough.
When I escaped again, she returned me to the crib.
And so I did again and again.
It was a silent war that lasted for weeks, but in the end, she threw in the towel when she saw I wasn't touching or getting close to dangerous things, and she just went out to the yard.
Besides that...
(Ziin! Swoon! raash!)
The sound of the air whistling as it was cut had become familiar to me. It was my father, Paul, who came out to the yard every day to swing his sword, shirtless...
It seemed like he was used to it and could have dismissed it as simple exercise, but the problem was that he always had that damn smug smile on his face.
And he also flirted with any woman who walked by, a total jerk.
"Hehe, what's up, Rudy? Are you here to watch your amazing dad train?" he said with his signature grin.
I just frowned in response and continued crawling toward my mom's garden.
I didn't turn around, but I can bet that guy's mood was now rock bottom, hehehe...
From what I could see, my mother puts considerable effort into her garden and fence, and her efforts have paid off.
You could say this was my favorite part of the house, with the view outside being a close second.
Just sitting here for a few moments can help calm the torment of thoughts running through my mind.
Okay...let's do it.
"Awaaah..." I murmured as I slumped forward slightly. I needed the privacy of this place to practice, and what was I practicing? I just wanted to walk.
Crawling is one of the most tedious and exhausting things I've ever done, so the easiest way to avoid this is to simply walk. I know it's still a bit early, but I should at least start laying the foundation for what is one of the activities I do every day.
I placed both hands firmly on the ground, raised my hips, and raised my back.
"Darling... have you seen Rudy?"
"Huh? He went toward your garden."
I was so focused on my own exercise that I didn't hear my mother ask for me.
"Uwoo...!" With a superhuman effort, I managed to stay on my feet. I was sweating profusely, and my legs felt like jelly under the weight of my body.
But this was already progress.
"Ngh..." With all my strength, I lifted a leg and walked?...no.
"Rudy?!...A-are you!" My mother's surprised scream snapped me out of my concentration, and I fell.
Shit!
I fell backward, but before doing so, I managed to grab one of my mother's tree branches, but unfortunately, they were roses...
The thorn cut my hand diagonally, I fell on my butt, and the weight of my own body made me fall backward...
"Aaaaah..." I let out a sigh, defeated by my situation.
"Rudy!" My mother ran to me worriedly and picked me up in her arms.
"Oh no...you just hurt your little hand..." she murmured sadly as we walked back to the house.
Given the panic I was in, I must have taken a pretty nasty fall.
I mean, I fell on my head. Maybe I was going to be permanently stupid. Not that that's a change from the usual.
My head was throbbing and my hand was burning. I tried to hold onto the branch, but it was right on a thorny spot, but I couldn't muster the energy.
My mother didn't seem that nervous now, so she probably wasn't bleeding that badly or anything.
Just a bump or something, and a minor cut, most likely.
She looked carefully at my hand.
The look on her face suggested that, wound or not, she was taking it very seriously.
Finally, she placed her hand on my head and spoke.
"Relax, this pain will pass..." she said and began.
"May this divine power be like a satisfying meal, giving one who has lost their strength the strength to get up again: Healing!"
Huh? Is that this world's version of healing, frog's tail? They don't even wash the wound or something?!
But as I thought that, my mother's hand glowed with a dim light, and the pain in my head and the cut on my hand instantly disappeared.
"Haaa?!"
"Here we go," she said. "Better! You know, Mommy used to be a very famous adventurer." Her voice rang with pride.
My mind reeled in confusion, various terms swirling through my mind:
sword, fighter, adventurer, healing, enchantment, cleric...
Seriously, what just happened?
My father, having heard my mother's scream, poked his head out the window. "
What's wrong?" he asked. He was sweating, probably from swinging his sword.
"Honey, you need to be more careful," my mother scolded. "Rudy managed to make it to the garden. He could have been seriously injured."
My father seemed much calmer. "Hey, boys will be boys. The kid has a lot of energy." This kind of back-and-forth was pretty common with my parents. But this time, my mother wasn't just backing away, probably because of how she'd cut me off.
"Honey, he's not even a year old yet. Would it kill you to show any more concern?"
"It's like I said: falling and stumbling and getting bumps and bruises is how kids grow up to be strong. Besides, if he gets hurt, you can fix it!"
"I'm just worried he'll get hurt so bad I can't fix it."
"He'll be okay," my father assured her.
My mother gripped me tighter, her face red.
"You were worried from the start about how he wouldn't cry. If he's a rascal like this, then he'll be fine," my father continued, then leaned over to kiss my mother.
All right, you two. Get a room, will you?
After that, my parents took me to the other room to put me to bed, and then headed upstairs to make me a little brother or sister.
I knew this because I heard creaking and groaning coming from the second floor.
I guess there was life outside the internet.
And also... magic?
After all that, I paid close attention to the conversations my parents had with each other and with the maid.
In doing so, I realized they used a lot of words I wasn't familiar with.
Most of these were the names of countries, regions, and territories, all of them clearly proper nouns I'd never heard before.
I didn't want to jump to conclusions, but at this point, that could only mean one thing: I was no longer on Earth.
This is a different world...
a world of swords and magic