"Well, once you were married, I could-"
"You never intended for me to become chief. That's what you're telling me. That, that mother's wishes are nothing to you?" He voice wavers with the force of her disbelief.
...
This is the first I've heard about her mother's wishes. Or Arnook's planning. It seems, we can add misogyny to our list of societal shortcomings. Not much of a surprise.
"I didn't say that! That's not at all what I-"
She silences him with a harsh, slashing gesture. "Enough! This- We're leaving!"
Yue drags me out of the room, and in answer to his pleading look, I nod. I'll see what I can do to put him in a more favourable light.
She ignores the looks we're getting, dragging me behind her, clearly upset, and to any who know her, ready to tear up. This is not a small thing. She has a right to feel the way she does, especially if Arnook always made her feel that she would be the tribe's leader one day. If her assumptions about the true nature of her engagement are true, Arnook is not the man I think he is.
The Spirit Oasis is our destination, and she slows to a stop at the entrance, breathes a deep breath, and tugs me inside behind her.
Her forcefulness is very uncharacteristic of her usual poised behaviour.
She goes to kneel before the pond, and forces me to do the same, if I don't want to yank myself free. I sit with crossed legs, instead.
'Hello, Tui and La,' I think, 'How much experience have you with agitated prncesses?' less than me, probably.
I resolve to let her begin the conversation. Anything I say will sound wrong, at this point.
"How-" her voice is thick with unspilled tears. No doubt her throat feels like it's closing up.
"Why…"
She turns her eyes on me, watery and devastated. Oh fuck. I am not equipped to handle this. Not well.
No words. Those will- I don't know. They're not what's needed.
Slowly, projecting my intentions so that she can move away if she wants to, I hug her. It feels awkward, and stilted, and clearly I've not hugged enough people since- since my mother. Well. Double fuck.
Sex is easy. It's familiar, movement, and never quite still. This is just painfully weird.
She must feel awkward, too, because she shifts, until we're properly pressed together, and her head is in the crook of my neck. I'm properly holding her now, and she feels so small, and delicate, and she's trembling.
"It's…" I slowly lift a hand to stroke her hair, "It'll be alright, I think."
She huffs, "You think? Spirits, no wonder you're always such an arse if this is what being kind does to you."
I sigh. At least she's not close to stuttering any more. I set my chin on top of her head.
"Stop that."
"Mmmno."
She shifts her head to look up at me, glaring. Alright, she's back. This worked out better than expected.
"Stop smirking."
I'm positive that my mouth was not doing anything like what she's accusing me of. Sighing, I resign myself to our familiar exchange, "Yes, princess."
Her mouth twists downwards. "Princess," she repeats, flatly. "Is that what I am?"
My arms still holding her up, I shrug. "To me, yes."
"Wonderful. Nothing's changed for you, huh?"
"I guess not. You're still the princess, the future leader of this tribe, and my personal pain in the-"
She hits me.
"Ow," I state, and get whacked up the backside of my head for my troubles.
"You moron! You're just like my father! Both stupid, and selfish, and drunk!"
"Hey. I'm not drunk."
"Right, but you will be, tonight! You're like, like mirrors of each other! Deciding what's good for me, and what isn't, and never telling me anything!" She leaves me no opportunity for protest as she rants. "And he's kept me in the dark for so long, going on about marriage when I could've been helping to protect the tribe! Marriage! When it could all end so soon!"
"Better to have someone lined up, just in case," I wonder whether it does her any good if I reiterate the motivations behind Arnook's encouraging her to choose Hahn as her intended.
"What?" She blinks, slowly. I'm sure the implications are already dawning on her, and she just wants to be sure that I said what she thinks I did.
"Well. We might all die. And we might not. But if your father ends up as one of the dead, we need someone to look to. You know how the people are, how the benders are, the council. They will hardly listen to you alone. You need someone respected by your side. Hahn is, with the warriors, just that. With my support for your union you have half the benders on your side, and the other half because of Pakku who has always supported your father. That leaves the civilians, who adore you. Think about it. With Hahn, you are in perfect position to take over the tribe."
"…What?"
I let go of her and let myself fall on my back. Sigh. "Politics, princess," I run a hand down my face and stare up at the night sky. "Our society is built on opinions of powerful people, and the people themselves."
She kicks me, not too gently.
"Ow. I was trying to be nice, here, princess. Show me some appreciation," I drawl, and roll to evade another kick.
Now comfortably back in my own private bubble of space, I can relax. Spirits, this girl is more than a handful. Good luck to you Hahn, although you might not be the one she decides on, after all. I think of Sokka. He'd worship the ground she walks on, the idiot.
"You fail," she states.
"Huh?"
"You fail at being nice."
"Great."
"What?"
"What?"
"You know what!"
"I… do?"
"Arrgh! That's it! I'll rule the tribe on my own one day! And you'll have to stop being such an idiot then! I'll make it a law!"
"I hereby command thy to never be an idiot again, Kaito, son of Hotaka! So it shall be henceforth!"
I am not prepared for the shawl that whacks me in the face.
...
The Avatar, I think as I watch his amazed face at Pakku and his student's performance for the New Moon Celebration, is a twelve-year-old child.
The world's hopes rest on his slim shoulders and there's nothing anyone can do to change that. I'm aware, always was aware, that he's younger than I am mentally. Maybe even physically if I don't count the hundred years he spent encased in ice. But seeing him flit about, well, he's just like I used to be when I was ten. Maybe a little more carefree, even. The poor kid. He has everyone's hopes riding on his back, just because the Avatar was traditionally a peacemaker.
Mine, too, as worried as I am about that fact.
Although he probably doesn't want any pity, it's what I feel for him. I wouldn't want to be the Avatar. The funny thing about responsibility is that it is never easy to define where it begins. I would argue that those who are not responsible for themselves are akin to children, or slaves. But does that make us all into slaves of the Avatar?
I'm aware that in the end, to stop Firelord and Fire Nation, Aang will have to step up, regardless of whether we are slaves or not.
That does not mean that I couldn't extend a helping hand. In what form, I don't know yet. I know of the invasion to come. If I were to remain here, in the North afterwards I might be able to build up a fort capable of withstanding a siege. I might be able to build a fleet of elite fighters who could take on the Fire Nation Navy by itself.
Those are, of course, fantasies. But they are possible, and so I would call them latent dreams.
However, too much hinges on this first point of contact with me and the story I once knew. Too much has cast this life into sharp relief for me to want to rely on vague memories of plotlines. Today has made it once more abundantly clear.
Reliance always makes dependent, which leads to compliance and eventually, weakness.
We're not weak. Yet.
...
Don't forget to throw some power stones :)
...
If you want to read ahead of the public release, or just want to support me.
you can join my p atreon :
[email protected]/Numera