The Sword Saint's blade was flirting with him.
Luo Feng stared at the shimmering longsword embedded in the sacred stone, its blade vibrating excitedly as he approached. The moment his shadow touched the hilt, the weapon launched itself free, twirling through the air like a lovestruck maiden before hovering expectantly in front of his face.
A voice like wind chimes made of steel echoed from the blade:
"You came back! I knew you wouldn't forget little Mie Chen!"
Li Qing's eye twitched. "Master's sword has a name?"
The Fox Spirit clutched her stomach, wheezing with laughter. "Oh this is too good—"
[System Alert: Divine Weapon Bond Detected]
[Mission: Acquire "Living God's Heartbeat" from Sentient Sword]
[Reward: Death Veil Immunity]
[Warning: Sword is Very Clingy]
Luo Feng reached out cautiously—
—and the sword lunged, its hilt pressing eagerly into his palm. The moment skin met metal, the blade transformed, shifting into a slender woman with silver hair and eyes like polished steel. She clung to his arm, nuzzling his shoulder.
"I knew you'd return to me! Even after you became all patchwork and weird!"
The Fox Spirit's tails bristled. "Okay, what?"
[The Sword's Secret: A Heartbeat of Steel]
Mie Chen (the sword, the girl, the disaster) pouted when Luo Feng explained what he needed.
"You only want me for my pulse?" She clutched her chest dramatically. "After all we've been through!"
Li Qing looked ready to commit blasphemy. "Swords don't have heartbeats."
"This one does!" Mie Chen grabbed Luo Feng's hand and pressed it to her sternum—where a steady thrum of divine energy pulsed beneath cold steel skin. "Forged from a shard of the War God's first blade! Very rare!"
The System confirmed:
[Living God's Heartbeat Detected]
[Method of Extraction: Romantic Flattery or Theft]
The Fox Spirit smirked. "I vote theft."
Mie Chen gasped and transformed back into a sword, hovering protectively out of reach. "Try it and I'll stab your other lung!"
[The Courtship: A Blade's Whims]
What followed was the most absurd hour of Luo Feng's life:
Poetry Attempt
Luo Feng: "Your, uh, edge is as sharp as the moon's curve…?"
Mie Chen: Swooning blade vibrations
Fox Spirit: Mimicking vomiting noises
Sword Dance
Mie Chen demanded a "mating flight" (aerial sword forms)
Luo Feng nearly impaled himself on a tree branch
Li Qing facepalmed so hard it echoed
The Final Request
"A lock of your hair! For my collection!"
The Fox Spirit: "She's literally the Death Queen but pointier."
[Progress: 85% (Just Needs to Seal the Deal)]
[The Death Queen Interrupts]
Just as Luo Feng secured the strand of hair (and Mie Chen giggled in blade form), the forest died around them.
Trees withered to ash. Birds fell mid-flight. And from the rotting undergrowth emerged the Death Queen's envoy—a skeletal figure in tattered bridal silks, its voice a chorus of weeping women:
"Mistress says: DON'T TOUCH MY SWORD."
Mie Chen shrieked and buried herself in Luo Feng's robes. "It's her wedding gift! She'll kill me for betraying her!"
The Fox Spirit's tails flared. "Okay, what wedding gift—"
The envoy lunged.
[Check-In Complete (Chaos Achieved)]
[Reward: Living God's Heartbeat Acquired (Via Dramatic Theft)]
[New Problem: Death Queen Now Extra Pissed]
They escaped by the skin of their teeth—Luo Feng clutching a shard of Mie Chen's blade (still pulsing), the sword herself wailing as she was dragged back into the shadows by skeletal hands.
The Fox Spirit grinned. "Two down, one to go!"
Li Qing stared at the lock of Luo Feng's hair now tied around the shard. "We're never speaking of this."
END OF THE CHAPTER32