I was lying on the couch — drifting somewhere between consciousness and sleep — while Misa, as usual, sat on my chest, licking the tip of my finger like it was some rare, addictive delicacy.
But that peaceful moment didn't last.
Ding dong.
My eyes widened in pure terror.
"Mom!"
I jumped like I'd been electrocuted.
"Hide! Now! Don't stand! Don't lick anything! Don't even breathe!"
Misa looked at me, then at the door, and with that innocent-devilish smirk said:
"Is she the new enemy?"
"She's my mom, Misa! My mom! If she sees you, I'll be buried alive!"
Misa bolted into my room, crawling into the closet — but not before grabbing my shirt and whispering:
"I'll wear this… your scent calms me."
God help me.
Knock knock. Again.
I opened the door with the fakest smile on my face.
"Kyle? What's that smell? It's like… some kind of weird creature lives here."
"Huh? Nothing! Cooking! I've started... cooking now!"
She narrowed her eyes suspiciously, pointing at the couch.
"And does cooking leave drool on furniture?"
I fumbled. Panicked.
"I had a dog! I adopted him! He, uh… ran away last night!"
But then — disaster struck.
A soft, flirtatious giggle echoed from the closet.
Feminine.
Dangerous.
Deadly.
I froze.
Mom looked at me.
Then at the closet.
"What… was that?"
"My stomach! It... makes sounds sometimes!"
But my mom, completely done with my crap, walked over and yanked the closet door open.
And there she was.
Misa.
Wearing my shirt.
Crouched like a cat.
Smiling like sin.
"Hiii!"
She waved her tail playfully.
My mom gasped.
Looked at her ears.
Then at me.
Then at her.
Then collapsed onto the couch, like her brain just quit.
"Who... who are you?! And why are your ears... like that?!"
Misa, with the most innocent voice ever:
"I'm his kitty. I mean — his girlfriend too. He feeds me, pets me, and sleeps beside me."
"WHAT?!"
My mom screamed — and I screamed with her:
"She's joking! I swear she's joking! I don't do any of that!"
But Misa leaned into my ear, whispering:
"Should I tell her about the bathroom?"
"MISA!!!"
And then...
My mom passed out.
Misa crawled up to her, sniffed her face like a curious feline, then muttered:
"Is this what all human mothers do when they're shocked by love?"