"Okay, okay. Class is over now. You all worked very well. I hope you enjoy your snack at break, Im going to go get a bagel from the canteen and, wait I need to save my myself, I'm going on a diet. A-hah, also..." Nobody cares to listen to the teacher, instead everbody walks out the classroom, ignoring the teacher's yabbering for their own safety.
Claria has art which happens to be in the classroom next to mine, it wouldn't suprise me if she heard the teacher shouting at me today. She normally meets met outside of 'Expressive art block' which as the name suggests, is the block with subjects like art, dt , graphics and so on. The names of each school buildings are very literal for example the building that teachs English is 'Language, literature block' named after the 2 types of English gsce exams.
I walk out the door of the building to see the bright sun a quarter way through the sky. The sky is clear but the winds are cold. I look around and see a girl with blue eyes and blond hair. As expected Claria is there, grinning at me mischievously.
"Mesia, I didn't know you had it in you." She lets out a small laugh, shes directly quoting sir. " I can't believe you actually swore. And over a petty reason at that."
"You don't need to remind me, and it wasn't petty. I have poor patience I didn't want to be teaching anybody anything."
Claria looks at me for a little bit before turning away. Claria is about 5'5 a similar height to me. Shes a gorgeous girl as I've already said. She's much more tolerant than I am and she doesn't bang on when I make it clear that I'm annoying. If she was fruity maybe I'd think about her as an option for the future.
I'm not against liking the same gender, if I manage to find someone who I care about, it wouldn't really matter to me what gender they are. Yet the world still has something against people like that. The world still can't accept anything different.
" So whats the new kid like, he doesn't talk to me in English. I'm pretty sure you guys have the same timetable or similar at the least. He's never in thought so you wouldn't be able to find out if you wanted to."
I think about it for a moment, she not wrong I'm pretty sure we'd have the same timetable if it wasn't for being in different sets for maths. I only remember what classes he has is because the headteacher made him stand up and say his name. A very American Movie like thing to do. "Hmm, Not maths. The days he wasn't in last week were Tuesday and Wednesday. Anyway everything but maths and that's because he in a different set."
"Ohhhh that makes sense. By the way the bus is supposed to be early today I remember checking the bus app I can't remember the reason, just try not to be late from maths."
Another thing about Claria is that she has expectional memory its not suprise that she knows my own timetable better then I do. I nod quietly while getting my snack out my bag. We chat for a while before making our way to class.
***
As I expected the whole day was long and slow so when the bell went to mark the end of the day, you could imagine the relief I felt.
Claria said that the bus way going to be early. I probably have 2-3 minutes to get there on time.
"Mesai,Can I talk to you for a second? It's about the maths mock exam we did at the end of year 10. I've finished marking them" A bold men , short and stuby approaches me. Im probably half a head taller then him. My heart sinks. I really can't be stuck talking to him even if it is important.
"Sir, I'm sorry I really need to go I can't miss the bus." There's a sense of urgency in my voice.
"It'll only take a second, please. I know I know youth these days aren't bothered by I think it'll be good for you to know." My eyes scan between the clock and sir, back and forth.
If this takes a minute I can quickly run to bus and make it just in time. I let out a small sigh and turn to him, nodding, a signal for him yo go ahead. His face lights up as he smiles brightly.
"You did exceptional well on this mock exam. You only dropped one singular mark, this is probably the best anybody in this school did in the actually Gsce when it was done. You have a really bright future. For the next few lesson's we'll be going through the scores and what could be improved on I'd like you to go to another set to help tutor other students who struggled more, clearly you don't need help here. That's all thank you." He waves me away, I don't need to say goodbye it would waste time.
To my house to the school it's about a 30 minute bus drive so if I did miss the bus it would take a good while to get home. I'd need a map or my phone to get directions, I would also be late to picking up my brother which I would rather not be, as the price of watching him for extra hours would sky rocket. Child care is not as cheap as people would expect.
I run to the bus stop even as strange eyes follow me, like I'm crazy person but they would do the same in my situation. My legs move as fast as they could with a heavy bag full of book on my back.
My luck was never worthwhile from the beginning yet still to my dismay, I watch as a large double decker bus exits the bus stop. It drives down a long busy road. I watch as it passes by cars and soon out of sight. My breath is heavy from the running.
I try to turn my phone on to see if ,even the slightest possibility, that their may be another bus. Even if the bus was an hour from know it would still be quicker than walking. Yet my life is basically a series of unfortunate events because the dark screen to my phone doesn't light up and it doesn't even ping to say that it's powering up. For what felt like the thousandth time I let out a sigh.
I can't help but feel hard done to, I can't blame my maths teacher. He approached me to praise me, he didn't know the situation with my bus and it would be a waste to say. Maybe I should have walked off but that would risk a detention. My uncle would only scream louder, drink more and possibly use violence if I make one slip up. That's the exact reason why I pretend to be 'perfect' so that nothing bad happens. Nothing has yet, not until now.
I look around to try find the nearest tourist store, with the hope of finding a map.
After a while of searching I give up and met by the comfort of sitting in some random bench, my eyes try to stay awake but I slowly fall asleep. The darkness that surrounds me when I sleep brings me comfort. Being alone is the only way to not be judged and the be peaceful. Thats what I want. To be left alone, a peaceful out of the way life.
After a while a familiar voice approaches me, his words are cold but helpful.
"You missed the bus to? I know a way back. Its relatively fast." when I open my I eyes I see him looking own at me, I only just realise that he poked me.
"Mhm, does this way happen to stop by a little after school daycare nursery?" I look down at his hand that was poking my shoulder, watching him withdraw. He looks up to the public footpath and the cars passing by before nodding as if he wasn't 100% sure. It's the only option I've got and I might even be able to pick up my brother along the way if what he says is right.
I shut my eyes again for a minute before asking another question. "What time is it now?" I can feel him looking at me even with my eyes closed. I can only presume that the rustling of clothes is him pulling his sleeves up to check a watch or something.
"4:50"
My eyes quickly open in shock, "Huh, Repeat."
"I said that its 4:50"
"Crap, I actually fell asleep." My head knocks back and I let out a low chuckle. Im so fucked. I really am gonna have to pay extra.
"How long is it going to take to walk to were the bus goes." My voice sounds just as tired or maybe even more so than the English teacher yesterday. I've completely given up, my luck was bad but each year it progressively gets worse.
" Well we get off at the same stop I don't know the way back to your house but I normally walk past a place with little kid's thats probably the nursery your on about? correct me if I'm wrong."
"Yeh I think thats the one."
"So are you coming, I have places to be aswell." I slowly open my eyes once again to see his dark eyes. They look half dead, tired, fed up. It looks like hes done with life.
It's the first time im curious about someone else. The first time I'm curious as to why someone has the same look in their eyes as mine.
***
We walk in silence until we reach a building slightly larger than a long bungalow. I can see the concrete is flooded with colourful chalk drawings which are scruffy and hard to decipher. A large lady walks out her arms crossed. I know I'm about to get a scolding from this lady. I know shes going to scream and shout. The only thing I can do is let it happen.
" Ma'am. Do you have issues at home." To my suprise the Lady is more concerned then anything else. I let out a sigh and explain the situation with my bus being late.
I lie through my teeth as I explain my family doing so called 'work'. Once again my hypocrisy shows, I hate lying yet here I am, lying. Maybe I think myself as better because my lies are white. My lies are to protect others. Atleast that is what I tell myself.
"My uncle has a business job and is away alot. My aunty does later shifts today so she couldn't make it, Im sorry."
"Hm, okay." The lady turns around quickly before shouting loudly, "BRADON." she calls my brother name and turns to face me." Try be on time next time."
A small boy comes running up, he's a bit small for his age, a little malnourished and his hair is messy. He comes running up and unhesitatingly hugs my legs. He starts crying and I lower my eyes. My once cold eyes warm up a little, so little that nobody would notice.
Yet the tall boy standing at the entrance to the daycare notices. He can see the difference and as I turn my head around I can see a small smile on his face, it's so faint. Just as faint as the happiness in my eyes. I watch him slowly turn around and walk away into the darkness of the young night.
I can't help but watch as my curiosity grows. Curiosity should never have been a thing gifted to people, it makes them relentless. I don't want to be like that, invading anothers life when I know how much I want to be left alone. Yet I still feel the need to know even just a little bit more.