Chapter 240: Allen Sends Lilith into a Humiliated Rage
The night was dark and the wind was high.
And in New York, nighttime meant crime time.
But the city's criminals had developed a preference: robbing ATMs yielded far better returns than mugging random pedestrians.
So it was common to see everyone's friendly neighborhood Spider-Man tangling with crooks by cash machines.
A shadow zipped across the sky and landed swiftly on a rooftop.
Deadpool had been waiting there, standing motionless like a statue.
"I have to say, you're incredibly stupid."
Lilith walked toward him step by step and said coldly, "You should have negotiated from the beginning, instead of trying to raise your price after the fact."
As she spoke, she silently activated her blood magic.
Hmm…
To her astonishment, the Deadpool before her remained unaffected, as if her magic had failed. Nothing happened as expected.
Normally, her spell would draw blood from a target little by little, killing them in agony.
Granted, Deadpool couldn't die, but it should've at least weakened him—enough to torment him bit by bit and see if he truly could ignore pain.
"What's going on?"
Her razor-sharp fingernails slashed through the air, leaving blood-red afterimages glowing in the night.
In an instant, Deadpool was chopped into several pieces—stuffing spilled out like cotton snow.
"A dummy!"
She'd been tricked with a fake!
Lilith's eyes widened. "Damn it—it's a trap!"
"Hi hi hi..."
From inside the rooftop water tank, Allen's head popped out with a smug grin. "You fell for it."
"Allen!?"
Lilith instinctively glanced around, wary of a possible ambush by a group of heroes. When she called Allen's name, she was actually using the sound vibrations to test the surrounding space.
"What's your name again?" Allen tilted his head.
Apparently, they'd never properly introduced themselves.
Not that Allen had any interest in learning the name of the leader of the vampire clan.
"Judging by the voice, the client's a woman. Let me get a look at her."
Wade squeezed his head out of the tank and whistled at Lilith when he saw her face. "Beautiful lady, if you're here to kill this guy next to me, I'll help you for free—as long as you agree to be my girlfriend."
"She pretty? Prettier than dolphin? King Shark wants to see too."
The tank opening was already tight, and now with King Shark trying to push his head through too, it became a chaotic crush.
"King Shark, stop pushing, my throat's jammed against the edge!"
"Allen, turn your face—our mouths are about to touch."
"King Shark's stuck! King Shark can't get out!"
"Who came up with hiding in a water tank?"
"Allen, that was your idea."
"..."
Lilith watched the three stooges jammed in the water tank, bickering like idiots, and her forehead twitched with frustration.
Three morons, stuck in a tank, looking just like Dugtrio from Pokémon.
Thinking back, Lilith felt utterly ashamed to have taken them seriously as enemies.
If she won, it'd feel like bullying the mentally challenged.
If she lost—then she wouldn't even be as good as said idiots.
A dilemma so humiliating it made her scalp tingle.
Might as well kill them while she had the chance.
A flash of resolve passed through Lilith's eyes.
Blood magic surged between her hands as she prepared to end Allen with a single strike.
Hmm…
A sharp gasp escaped her lips as her expression twisted—her left hand clutched at her chest.
That strange sensation again—it was back.
"Give me back my body parts!" Lilith roared.
"Hey, hey, hey—what the hell are you talking about? When did I steal your kidney?" Allen shot back.
"..."
Allen had no idea that the two red bats he'd captured were actually Lilith's breasts.
Of course, Lilith couldn't exactly say out loud: Give me back my boobs.
"You stole what part of hers? She's so pissed she hired someone to kill you! What could you possibly take off someone's body like that?" Wade asked curiously.
"Maybe… her heart," Allen mused. "After all, I'm a known heartbreaker. It's practically common knowledge."
"So she's one of those 'if I can't have you, no one can' types. Terrifying," Wade said with a serious nod. "You can mess with a woman's body, but not her feelings."
Allen looked up at the stars and sighed dramatically. "What is love, if not a holy disaster awaiting mass salvation?"
"Shit, I didn't expect you to be poetic." Wade looked jealous.
"Master is amazing. King Shark wants to read more and be a poet too."
King Shark didn't understand what was said but thought it sounded impressive.
"Talent is innate," Allen said smugly. "Just one of my many subtle, incredible traits."
He went on bragging, "Actually, I'm a Pokémon trainer. Got tons of pets—King Shark, the Supreme Sorcerer Dog Husky, the Devourer Cat with Three Colors, and the two red bats."
"You're full of it. Total nonsense," Wade said, skeptical.
"That's enough!"
Show some respect!
This isn't your damn chatroom, you jerks!
Lilith's face was flushed with anger, and her eyes blazed. "Give me back those two bats you caught, and I'll let you live."
"Nope!"
Allen rejected her flatly. "They're my loofahs now—I've gotten used to them. Without 'em, my showers feel soulless."
Loofahs?
Used for bathing!?
Hearing that, Lilith nearly coughed up blood from rage.
Those were her…
And he was rubbing them all over his body every day?
Wasn't that basically like giving him daily Thai-style imperial massages herself?
"I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"
Furious beyond reason, Lilith summoned a massive curtain of blood behind her. She no longer cared about hiding her presence—her mind was consumed by the desire to murder Allen.
Suddenly—
A flash of silver light tore through the blood curtain.
No one knew when he arrived, but a middle-aged priest now stood at the edge of the rooftop, each hand gripping a silver sword, the blades crossed into a cruciform. His voice rang out with solemn authority:
"I am Zerath, War Priest of the New York Diocese, follower of the Lord, Centurion of the Silver Cross, one of the Twenty-Six Sacrificed—I will not allow vampires to plague mankind."
"Damn, cool entrance."
"Holy crap, this guy's a master poser."
"Who is he? King Shark is very shocked."
The trio jammed in the water tank stared in awe. This guy's dramatic entrance was maxed out. Four titles, all recited at once—clearly terrified someone might not know who he was.
"Get lost. Don't get in my way," Lilith snapped. She had no interest in tangling with him—her only goal was to finish off Allen.
"Vampire," Zerath declared, "as a War Priest, I have sworn before the Lord never to let your kind slaughter the innocent."
He chanted quickly, "O Lord, blade of divine justice on Earth, hear your follower's prayer. Let the will of the Silver Cross grant your protection. I offer myself in sacrifice to drive back the darkness. Amen!"
A beam of white light shone over the city.
A portal opened in the sky, and from it emerged a six-winged angel, descending in response to the prayer.
"It's you!"
Lilith's face paled. "The Supreme Sorcerer who massacred the progenitors of darkness five hundred years ago…"
Before she could finish, bats scattered in all directions in a panic.
She had witnessed firsthand the brutal battle of the New Continent during the dimensional invasion. Had she not fled when things looked grim, she would've been dead too.
Zerath, however, stared at the angel in a daze, then whispered with excitement, "The Lord is watching over me…"
Clearly, Lilith had mistaken him for Allen from five hundred years ago.